• Member Since 5th Dec, 2011
  • offline last seen 1 hour ago

Cynewulf


Kofi: https://ko-fi.com/aliceroarke | Discord Link: Ask! | Blog: Coming soon!

E

Finished. It's nearly finished, now.

After the world, there are two ponies. One who sits and watches. One who comes and goes. They cannot leave each other, but they cannot stay in one place together. One works towards some last great mystery, and the other explores the darkness outside. But they never leave.

Twilight Sparkle is going to do the impossible. Again. And she knows that she will be successful, because she has already done it.

Loosely inspired by Endgame, by Samuel Beckett

Chapters (1)
Join our Patreon to remove these adverts!
Comments ( 40 )
JMP

Huh. Just....huh. Good, interesting read, but I unfortunately don't have anything more substantial to say than just, huh. I liked the story, though.

A fascinating way to describe the end of the universe.

Only twilight would get so worked up over the inevitable heat death of the universe, though the fact that the ponies lasted that long into the future surprises me greatly, they should've long since evolved into a new form or died out. Maybe even spread among the stars, then died out, then evolved again back into pony-like shapes. This is many billions of years we are talking about.

Then again, I'm applying real world physics to a universe of magic so...

7641044 I was going to write my paper for Development of Drama on how Endgame was set in a post-nuclear apocalypse but instead I did it on the treatment of time. Good times.


7641038 you should watch the Play. It's an experience. With good actors, it's weirdly great despite being, well, absurd.

You clearly tagged it dark because it is dark outside.

Words cannot express how well this story was written.

Curious about who the little one is. The teacher, maybe?

Don't know which tag actually applies, but I think dark is a bad fit.

7641771 I'm not sure that the End of the World isn't a bit dark.

Hmm, interesting. Part of the final set up seems to be inspired by the answer to Issac Asimoth's the last question.

Also, the name Beckett brings out memories of Quantum leap for me

7641794 Dying of old age isn't dark XD

7641862 IF you go in your sleep it isn't.


My experience is that every conscious dying is pretty horrifying.

....You know, I think I'm super fond of this. There's quite a bit going on here and I may need another read to get everything but anything that reminds me of Bastion is absolutely okay, and I do want to read Samuel Beckett now.

7641881 I don't think the ponies who witnessed the death of the universe really had much time to experience their death. I mean, I guess death by it's nature is dark... Like I said, I don't know what tag matches this.

That was certainly interesting. The thought of Twilight going back over and over again in a desperate fight against entropy is certainly an interesting idea to portray.

I find it very curious that you chose to follow a separate character from Twilight in all of this. I will admit following her perspective certainly helps to build up the strangeness and bleakness of the setting, but I think Twilight would have offered up a much more interesting look at things especially with her conflict here.

Unfortunately, that's the problem here. The conflict to me doesn't feel very real. What is actually at stake for the main character? Not a whole lot. Oh you certainly have interesting discussions and musings on the world, but as for something that is actually at stake for the main character that will elicit a change, even a small one, , it feels lacking. Twilight has all the conflict working on going back in time, but Blossom? She's just there and that's it.

So, I think a vague conflict at best is what holds this story back from being really great, but as it is, I'd say it's okay-not exceptional, but okay.

7642168 because Twilight isn't doing anything. She's working yet but she doesn't do anything more than what a machine does and that's the point.

She loses herself every time.

Twilight is stuck in a loop. Blossom is actually alive. She's the only one alive in more than the merely technical sense. Twilight goes back with Blossom so this time she can let someone in on the secret. So she can have community and have more room to be a person instead of just a machine.

7642193

Twilight goes back with Blossom

No she doesn't.
Please Show the line in the story where that happens.

7642249 It's not physical. From what I understood, touching the horn was the activation of a memory spell like RoH. Twilight's memories go back, but not her. Think somewhat like Search for Spock.

If I am right, how many lifetimes has she gone through? Scary thought.

7642261

touching the horn was the activation of a memory spell

There was an awesome oneshot fimfic of Starlight Glimmer in a time loop using that spell transfer. Do you remember it?

7642249

Um, he wrote the story. I think he is the one who gets to determine what happened during it.

7642275
I am claiming that he forgot to write an intended scene.

This was fascinating and chilling. I just... Wow.

7642310 I have no idea what you're referring to.

7642249

It’s alright. You will. I’ll carry you. I think… I think you’ll like it. We’ll go together. When I meet you again, it will be different.”

We'll go together. There being two characters, she can only be referring two Blossom. Together+Twilight going back=Blossom, logically, also goes back. Otherwise they would not go together.

It's literally right there in plain English.

7642534 Clearly those lines were spoken by Chrysalis, who had been there the whole time disguised as a chair. Any claims to the contrary are not privileged. Death to the author! Death to authorial intent!

(Translation: le sigh)

7642629 damn now I wish I had actually done that

7642534 7642534
The active implication of "We'll go together" is nullified by the active implication of "when i meet you again".
With this current arrangement of Twilight's speech, one or both of those statements must be allegorical.

If the two sentence fragments were in reverse order, the new implied causality of Twilight's statement would allow the reader to understand the intended implication of Twilight's speech

7641881 Other than it being painful (depending on the means), death is primarily oxygen deprivation to the brain. So all-in-all, it's probably more trippy or surreal than horrifying.

As for the story, for me it certainly captured the feel of 'entropy', in a way. This slow wearing down of information into noise and darkness.

7642751 seeing as how it seems to have not been a problem for anyone else, have you considered that you are seriously misreading one or both of those statements?

You have no idea where or when Blossom was deposited. It is very possible and in fact as I've already pointed out, explicitly stated, that they go together and meet again. If you think about this honestly for a few seconds you'll realize that these are not exclusive at all. If two people cross a threshold, it would be right if they said--we go together/see you on the other side--and that's if they arrive in exactly the same place.

The statements in either order mean the same thing as they do now. You're reading a conflict which does not exist.

7642751 How would those two reversing in order in any way reconcile the apparent contradiction, which is not, as a point of fact, any sort of contradiction? Particularly since we, as readers, can both understand that Twilight has fired up the Bastion and is going into a time loop, and that Apple Blossom has just been told that she is coming too. As a point of fact, it seems as though Twilight is inviting her along on a magical train to the past. I don't know how you missed this.



7642707 No you don't.

Profound.

That is all.

Ah, Twilight. Always struggling to answer The Last Question.

I'm a bit curious, if you'll indulge me - what happened to the others? Did they fade away when their respective domains did as well?

The Last Question, and Eternal Recurrence. So she's a combination to me of Multivac and Wilhelm. Hah. How droll.

Think you'll be tempted to continue this one? Solve for the end? Go over Twilight's future meeting with Blossom?

7643144 you know, I'm not sure myself. I have theories.

7643293

Well, do tell! in PM if you dont want to poste them here.

7641059 i would say that heat death of a magical universe is implausible. not when the universe is basically run by emotion, friendship, and so on.

beneath.them

That period should be a space.

Implaccable

You put an extra C in that word.

wasn't’

Extra apostrophe.

7643506
Well that's assuming the magic doesn't work like thermodynamics, ie the transfer of energy from one body to another. Also, since this has happened in the story several times, the heat death is happening.

Which, considering the stars wink out one by one and everything goes black, seems fairly obvious it works similar to our laws of physics, although the true hear death would cause all of the particles to reirganize themselves into a homogenous structure throughout the entirety of the Galaxy. If Equus is still there, then that proves it's not a real heat death. Perhaps a magical eat death?

Luz

.. interesting portrayal of the End of the Universe.

Login or register to comment
Join our Patreon to remove these adverts!