Crossworlds Guardian, Sailor Orbital!

by Masterweaver

Outfitting and Armory! Some Problems are Encountered.

"So as most of you know, we are here today to form a strike group with the intention of gathering enough data to unlock a portal to a secret moon base and gain access to an ancient stargate network spread out across the planet whilst simultaneously dealing with a potential invasion of hostile extra-terrestrials through said stargate network." Blue Oyster cleared her throat. "I'm really only repeating this for Carrot Top and Summer Raindrops--KIKAI WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!"

The Munarin blinked. "I am... preparing to consume this lovely meal that miss Golden Harvest made for me?"

"It's Earth food! You're an alien! Even assuming your biochemistry is founded on the same principles as our own there's no reason to believe that our bodies can process similar proteins or sugars or--"

"Do not fret, miss Oyster. I have been aligned."

"...And what does that mean?"

"While we were still active on your planet, we would magically bind our physical forms to the essence of other species. As you say, it would be foolhardy to eat anything from this world otherwise; with a simple spell we rendered our physiologies similar to native creatures and, in so doing, avoided the faux pas of dying in the homes of our hosts."

"Oh." Blue threw up her hands. "Right. Great. No, it really is great, because that's a good quarter of sci-fi conflicts solved right there, because of course we have magic now! Whoop-dee-freakin'-do!"

Golden Harvest quirked an eyebrow. "I thought you were supposed to be the sane one."

"Well, yes, but... it's just hard, knowing that a lot of what I know isn't that important anymore." Blue sighed. "Okay, fine. So I guess... wait, but you were in stasis for a thousand years. Are you sure you're still safe to--"

"I aligned myself three days ago," Kikai assured her. "With one... Spike, I believe his name was. Quite an erudite individual, and his handler was very intelligent herself."

"Oh. Well. Alright then." Blue Oyster rubbed her forehead. "Right, where was I?"

"You were telling us that we got together to save the world," Raspberry Fluff offered.

"Right, right right. Anyway!" She turned and gestured at five mannequins behind her. "After some discussion with the Aztlan institute and a few purchases of my own from a few Company of D.R.E.A.M.S. subsidiaries, I've managed to wrangle together a basic outfit kit for each of us."

Ditzy tilted her head. "Those are Crossworlds Guardian Emergency Worker Uniforms, aren't they?"

"Yes. Well, mostly. You and Summer--"

"Raindrops!" the green-haired girl said. "I prefer Raindrops!"

"...Raindrops," Blue corrected, "need your neck fluff exposed to fly, and Razz probably should have her gem exposed if she's flinging fire around willy nilly. So I ditched the helmets and rigged together something different." She tapped a tiara resting on one of the mannequin's heads. "This is a micro-radio, complete with earbuds, that will let us remain in contact if we are anywhere within... three, four miles of each other. They are not aerodynamic, so there's not going to be any Lunar Tiara Action."

Ditzy pouted.

"Most of the rest of the suit is intact," she continued. "The undersuit will protect against environmental factors such as fire and acid, the boots have built in micro-jets that allow for impressive jumps and zero-grav maneuvering if needed, the torso armor has numerous shock absorbers so we can survive getting banged around a bit, and the greaves..." She took one of the manniquin's arms. "They're connected to a sort of magical pocket dimension--it can only store so much, but there's no weight on you, and you can recall items at any time. I've taken the liberty of loading all of these with some standard emergency equipment: Gas masks, first aid kits, emergency translocators, survival guides--"

"Question," Golden Harvest interrupted. "Are the colored collars and miniskirts just so we can look like Sailor Luna and her pals?"

"Actually no." Blue moved her hands up to the sailor collar. "The jewel on the chest is the outfit conversion module--you put your hand to it and say a keyphrase, you switch back to your civilian clothes. The ribbons serve as thaumatic dispersion units, keeping hostile magic from overwhelming the wearer. And the collar itself is woven with the Identity Derecognition Pattern."

"The what now?"

"...The stuff the Power Patriots wear, that psychologically disconnects the image of the wearer from other identities in the viewer's minds."

"Oh, I remember reading about that!" Razz proclaimed gleefully. "Like, there was a mental filter to keep us from noticing magic, then Sunset repurposed it to keep us from freaking out about magic, then after the Power Patriots were made she agreed to repurpose it again so they could keep their civilian identities safe from the general public!"

"She sure is getting a lot of mileage out of that spell," Ditzy commented.

"Of course she is. Our Divine Bacon Horse is very environmentally friendly."

Blue Oyster rolled her eyes. "Theological debates aside... we're going to be beating up aliens in miniskirts. Which means we're going to get attention. This is a preemptive measure to dissuade hordes of fans locating our homes."

"Speaking of which, what are the miniskirts actually for?"

"The miniskirts cover up the hideous-looking lower armor."

"Hey!" Ditzy cried. "It doesn't look that bad!"

Blue frowned. "It looks like a metal diaper."

"Okay, first of all, diapers are curvy and the armor's sort of boxy. Secondly, it has those..." Ditsy gestured. "Ringy... things. The sort of ring things that Sailor Luna has on her shoulders and gloves. Right?"

"So it looks like a space diaper. The point is it's embarrassing and the miniskirt covers it."

"It's a miniskirt," Raspberry noted. "Won't it flip up and--"

"There are magnets."

"...but--"

"Can we move on from the miniskirt please?"

Raspberry stuck out her tongue, but backed off.

Blue Oyster took a breath. "Now then. That's the general outfit. In addition, I've procured a couple of unique items for each of us, tailored to our specific strengths and potential positions." She opened a cloth bag. "First, Ditzy, you're the one that has the most combat experience. So you're our general fighter and coordinator. I am fully aware of the irony," she added, pulling out two rods and handing them over, "so no comments."

Ditzy took the proffered objects. "I recognize this, it's the purifier I... pointed at that Vaucoi."

"Yes, I figured if it worked once it should work again. Of course, you have to get in range to use it, and there's no guarantee--it only works on 'tainted' magic, and there's a lot of technobabble behind that, so you also have..." Blue trailed off.

"Yes?"

"I want to say I didn't name the thing, I just bought it."

"And spray painted it pink," Razz added.

Blue sighed. "Yes. And spray-painted it pink."

"Okay." Ditzy twirled the other rod. "So what is this?"

"It's called a Mystic Mace." Blue shrugged. "It's basically a mace, made with modern day technology, that can also generate magical pulses of energy for pushing back crowds."

"Huh. Explained the thick ball on the end."

"Yes. Now--"

"Hold on!" Raindrops interjected. "Does that make her Sailor Luna?"

Blue sighed. "For the last time, we can't use the Sailor Luna names because of copyright!"

"How about Sailor Orbital then?"

"Sailor O--Razz, did you talk to her before this meeting?"

Raspberry held up her hands with a grin. "Don't look at me. I guess great minds think alike."

"I don't mind being Sailor Orbital," Ditzy said.

"Well, you do orbit my fridge," Golden Harvest noted.

"Okay, you know what, that was only one time! And I paid for all the groceries to replace what I ate!"

"Although I cannot blame her," Kikai added. "Your cooking is incredibly good, miss Harvest. I've never been so absorbed in eating before."

"Yeah, seriously though." Raspberry looked Ditzy over. "How are you not a beluga by now? You eat so much--"

"It goes straight to her butt!" Raindrops cheered.

Ditzy flushed. "It--okay, so I've got some padding back there, but--look, I lead a very active lifestyle, okay?"

Blue rubbed her temples. "If you girls don't settle down and behave yourselves, I'm not going to show you what toys I got you."

Golden Harvest grabbed Raspberry and Raindrops by their shoulders, pushing them back into their chairs. "Let's leave the schoolyard teasing to the schoolyard."

"Thank you, Carrot Top. Actually, let's get to you next." Blue pulled out a set of thick gloves. "Now, you've been in a couple martial arts tournaments before, so I'm going to make you the brawler. You get in, kick high, punch hard."

Golden picked up the gloves. "I notice there are some sort of wires in these things."

"Yes, those are Tesla gloves. You curl them up as fists, they generate an electric charge--give your punches an extra something. And if you clap them together, that electricity is released in a bolt of lightning--just in case you need a ranged option."

Ditzy whistled low. "Wow. That's a lotta power right there."

"Yes, well. I think the electric punching is all she's going to need, but best to be prepared. Also!" Blue let out a strained grunt as she pulled something long and heavy from the bag. "Got you, unf, this thing."

Golden took the object and looked it over. "...A sledgehammer?"

"Extra large. In case we need a wall smashed in or something."

"Hmm." The girl tested the heft. "Yeah, I can live with this."

"I'm calling you Sailor Plasma," Raindrops announced. "Because plasma and electricity are the same thing!"

Blue winced. "They're... not. They're really not."

"Me next!" Raspberry demanded. "What'cha get me, bestest friend ever?"

She gave her a flat look. "You're going to be flinging around fireballs. Do you really want more?"

"...Kinda?"

"Ugh. Fine. I made you this." Blue tossed her what looked like a ticker-tape dispenser with a handle on it.

"Hand-crafted, niiiiice! What's it do?"

"You know how you're enchanting those strips of paper to help us out? That thing lets you launch it a whiles away. Couple that with your pyrokinesis, and you're going to be our crowd control and sniper. Oh, that reminds me." She reached into the bag and handed her something else. "Scoping eye protection, lets you see long distances and through smoke or fog."

"So, magic sunglasses."

"...yes, fine. Magic sunglasses."

"¡Excelente!"

"Shadowjack's not canon," Ditzy singsonged.

"Hush, aguafiestas. Sailor Meteor's ready to go."

"Ooo! Ooo!" Raindrops leaned on the table. "What'd you get me?!"

"Well, I don't know much about you, but I hear from Ditzy that you're quite the acrobat." Blue shrugged, putting a couple of items on the table. "And if we're going with a theme anyway... you get the Magical Resonance Chain, which you can use to grapple things, and the Flaring Projection System, for shock and awe purposes. Your main job, though, is to get any civilians caught up in whatever mess is going on... out of the mess. You got that?"

"Yes ma'am! Sailor Photon is ready to go!"

Ditzy grinned. "So, what about you, Blue? Does Sailor Comet have anything special?"

"Sailor Comet. Why am I sailor Comet?"

"Probably the same reason I'm Sailor Plasma," Golden Harvest pointed out. "If we have magic secret identity collars, we need code names, right?"

"...Fair point. Okay, fine." Blue Oyster pulled two final items from the bag. "I'm going to be playing support and tactical analyzer, mostly. I've got my variable output ice sprayer, which lets me go anywhere from fog through icicles to, in theory, freezing things solid. And on top of that I've got my Virtual Analysis Visor, which... is essentially Gillion Glasses, but on their own separate network and with some more... tactical stuff. It's really complicated."

"Well, looks like we've all got cool gadgets to use," Ditzy quipped.

"So... now what?" Raindrops asked.

Blue Oyster steeled herself. "Now, we gather our new devices, practice with them, and be ready to go whenever we hear about an alien incursion."

Raspberry raised a hand. "Yeah, question? How are we going to hear about these aliens?"

Blue froze. "...I have no idea."

Author's Note:

"Well, don't look at me! I'm just a weirdness magnet, I don't know how to actually FIND strange events!"

"I must confess my own lack of knowledge toward tracing the Gates.

"So we're prepared to go, but have no idea where? I did all that work for nothing?!"

"I'm sure we'll figure this out in the next chapter, Blue..."

Comments

[FredMSloniker]

I was going to comment on the hazards involved with syncing your digestive system with a dog's, but it turns out cats shouldn't have chocolate either, so.

[GreenDrakeWeboen]

And of course, she forgets the alien cat. Kikai could totally rock a miniature mine dispenser, or something.

[Malandy]

Updated so fast! ... Space-themed codenames! ... Secret Identities... Magitech powers... This is set up for the battles! And it is great! ... Hmm... How prepared will they be for their first battle?

Another Noodle Incident! Ditzy literally orbiting Harvest's fridge??

Hmm... How to get Gate Locations or Vaucoi sightings... Twilight and her Magic-Detector-thing being repurposed? Or involving Discord or the Power Patriots? ... They need transport around the world in good time... Repurpose Ditzy's involuntary transport mechanism? ... Or the only Gate under human control...

Dinky hasn't shown up for 2 chapters...

So many tropes to catalog! Don't got the time... So sad! Love how it's so self-aware!

Ditto for Kikai possibly encountering problems from Aligning with a dog.

[mastermenthe]

I love it i love i love it I LOVE IT!!!!

[Rikmach]

7714316

Another Noodle Incident! Ditzy literally orbiting Harvest's fridge??

i2.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/facebook/000/146/893/731.jpg

[FanOfMostEverything]

Truly, there is no greater display of ungraciousness than dying from your host's hospitality.

As for the team's equipment, I have to say, Blue did a very thorough job. Useful and on theme. It's not every day you see such a combination.

On a semi-related note, I blame you for my losing the better part of a week to reading Shadowjack's recaps.

[shirotora]

and the greaves..." She took one of the manniquin's arms.

Greaves are leg armor. Vambraces is what I think you mean here.

Also, what's the limit determined by in the pocket dimension; Mass or volume?

[Man without a plan]

7715013 The limit is determined by whatever Weaver needs it to be determined by ATM, I think is a safe guess.

[ArtieStroke]

Doodled a little something at work, hope you enjoy!

i.imgur.com/U0bDg1u.jpg

[Masterweaver]

7718617
Oh wow, that's a lot better then my version!

[ArtieStroke]

7718734
Aww shucks, weren't nothin- just modified the design of a Sailor Moon outfit based on the description Blue Oyster gave. Thanks to you for painting a vivid picture with words!