All hail the Queen
Thorax stood before a crowd of unaltered changelings. They weren’t the warrior caste he and his friends had dealt with when infiltrating the castle, but those of the lower worker caste. They looked terrified after having been rounded up by their multicolored brethren. Thorax leaned over to his yellow colored guard and whispered, “Weevil, you did inform them they wouldn’t be harmed, correct?”
Without taking her eyes off the crowd Weevil answered, “Yes your majesty, although some may not have heard us over all the screaming.”
Thorax facehooved. Less than a third of the changelings within the central hive had transformed, most of them being in the warrior caste. He had hoped to ease the rest of the changelings through this transition, but clearly that was no longer possible.
A lone changeling stepped in front of the crowd, he was barely half the height of Thorax, “What are you?”
Thorax smiled down to him and to the crowd, “I used to be just like all of you. I can still remember the constant hunger, and how we fought over scraps of love while the upper caste gorged themselves. I have cast off that old life and the name changeling. With the friendship of ponies and each other we have become—The Ninltkim.” Thorax held out a colorful hoove. “You can become like this too just share your love with others, be their friend.”
The Changeling glanced around but got only confused looks from the other changelings. “I-I’ll try.” He closed his eyes and allowed his magic to flow from him. The magic almost immediately rebounded and swirled back around it’s owner, wrapping him into a tight cocoon. Within moments the Changeling emerged as a colorful version of himself.
“How do you feel?” Thorax asked.
“I feel...full.” The new Ninltkim said. He looked over his new body and asked. “But do I have to look so ugly?”
Thorax gave a laugh. “You’ll get use to it.”
Seeing their comrade was unharmed other changelings took the plunge and allowed their magic to turn them into ninltkims. The new ninltkims stood with Thorax and look to the remaining changelings. “You see there is nothing to fear,” Thorax said, and gestured to the ninltkims. “This is the natural step in our evolution. No longer must we—”
“HERESY!” A voice from the back of the crowd called out. The crowd parted and all eyes fell onto a single changeling, who stared Thorax down with flaming emerald eyes. “You're all crazy, there is nothing natural about what you're becoming. Are you so ashamed of what you are that you would cast off your very names! I was born a changeling, I am a changeling, and I will always be a changeling and when the Queen returns she will deal with you traitors, but I will have no part in this.” She turned on her hooves and bolted from the hall.
“After her!” Weevil ordered.
“No!” Thorax countered. “Let her go, I will not force this on those who are not ready.” What little trust he had with the other changelings was all but shattered now. He hung his head, “Much has happened today, please return to your homes and think over what we’ve offered you.” Thorax nodded to his guards and they turned to leave, as the other changelings wasted little time in dispersing.
Thorax was all too happy to enter his chambers. He could hardly believe it had only been a week since he became a king. He trotted over to a round table were the stacks of paperwork waited for his approval. Most of it were request forms from the worker and royal caste, but a few were from the princesses in Equestria. He wasn’t sure how Chrysalis handled all of this no matter how much he did there was always more to come. “Maybe that’s why Chrysalis was always so angry.” He thought to himself.
A knock on the door drew his attention, “Enter,” He called.
Weevil let herself in and trotted up to Thorax. With a quick salute she said, “I have the report from the team we send to the southern hive.” —Thorax gave a nod and Weevil continued— “Unfortunately, while we were able to contact the Hive Lord he refused to acknowledge us as changelings stating and I quote, ‘We will never acknowledge some nymph, who drowns himself in paint, as ruler. We have but one queen: Queen Chrysalis.’ As we speak the southern hive is fortifying their defences under the belief we will be launching an attack. Will we be launching an attack?”
“Of course not!” Thorax snapped, regretting it almost immediately. “I’m sorry, I didn't mean to yell. But we will not be like Chrysalis, we will be better.”
“If I may be blunt your majesty, pleasant words and kind actions will not solve our problems, sometimes an iron hoof is needed. Qu—Chrysalis, understood this quite well. She may have been cruel at times, but I never doubted that everything she did was done for the hive.”
Thorax steard at her for a moment and contemplated her words. “If that’s true then why did you side with me?”
She answered back with unblinking eyes, “I was tired of being hungry.”
Thorax sighed. He looked over his paperwork and watch the words blur together. “Even so, I will not stoop to her level.”
“I wasn’t sure if I should bring this up, but it seems I must. For the past few nights our scouts have spotted groups of civilians fleeing the hive, as of yet we don’t know where they are going.”
Thorax’s head shot up, “Why am I just now hearing about this?”
Weevil pointed a hoof at the table, and said. “You can barely keep up with all the work as it is. I did not wish to burden you any further, besides would you have ordered us to bring them back?”
Thorax shook his head. “No, this city is not their prison.”
A ninltkim guard stormed into the room, stopping just feet past the threshold. He took in a gulp of air, as Weevil called out. “What is the meaning of this?”
“Forgive my intrusion, but there is a messenger in the throne room. He claims to have a message from former Queen Chrysalis.”
Thorax rose to his hooves and wasted very little time, “Come Weevil, let us see what Chrysalis has to say.” Thorax led the way through the shifting hallways, and despite the pathways opening and closing at seemingly random he knew exactly where he was going.
They exited out of a tunnel into the throneroom shortly after. The room was still a mess from the fight with Chrysalis; the remains of the throne still lay scattered about, and the hole in the ceiling had yet to be sealed.
Sitting near the throne was a Changeling in full armor; the mandibles on his helmet identified him as an elite guard. Thorax and his two guards stood before the messenger and Thorax spoke in his most commanding voice. “I am told you have a message, let's hear it.”
“The Queen does not wish to plunge her people into a civil war. She requests a meeting with you on how best to resolve this for the betterment of our race, Queen on...King.” The Guard said, nearly spitting out the last word.
Weevil leaned close and whispered to Thorax, “I advise caution my lord. Chrysalis will have some plan in store for you, I’m sure.”
Thorax nodded and addressed the Changeling “I agree, Inform your Queen that she is free to return to the hive at her leisure, and I will guarantee her safety while she is here.”
“No,” the guard quickly said.
“No?” Thorax asked in confusion.
“The Queen is far too wise to trust the word of a traitor, but in her wisdom she has suggested a neutral meeting ground. Travel to the Black Rock Valley, follow the dried river bed east until you come upon a great gorge, and at the deepest point of the gorge you will find a cave. That is where the Queen will meet you and only there. She will wait one day for your arrival and no more, so if you fail to show you have only your cowardice to blame for the resulting war.” The Guard glanced over to the other ninltkim, and gave an uncomfortable twitch of his wings before he asked. “Is there a message you want to send back?”
“No,” Thorax said in a cold voice.
“Good, then I’m leaving before your filth gets on me.” Said the Guard. His wings buzzed and he flew out through the ceiling.
Thorax and Weevil watched as the guard disappeared into the sky. “You know it’s a trap.” said Weevil.
“I’m sure she will try something, but if there is even the slightest chance of avoiding a war we have to take it.” Thorax said. He closed his eyes and breathe in the badland air.
“She is going to kill you.”
“She can try.” Thorax stated. It may have only been a week but he had been growing more confident in his magic.
“Oh she will, again, and again.
“That was rhetorical.”
“Your majesty,” Weevil began, turning to him. “This meeting may just be the thing we need. As long as Chrysalis lives your rain will never be secure. If the chance arrives, I recommend killing her.”
Thorax shook his head. “Not if there’s a way we can get her to understand.”
“And if there’s not?”
“Than I will do it personally,” Thorax said. His voice hung with sadness at the prospect of killing another being. “Gather fifty of your best guards, if this is a trap then we will go prepared.” Weevil salute and left, leaving Thorax to stair out of the broken ceiling. He suddenly wished he was back in the Crystal Empire with Spike when things were so much simpler.
***
The directions the Guard had given were simple enough to follow, but what the Guard failed to mention was the sheer distance they would be traveling. It had taken them eight hours alone to reach Black Rock Valley and then another three to follow the river bed and find the cave.
The group landed more than one hundred yards away from the entrance and watched for any signs of trouble. Twenty meters tall cliff walls blocked both sides of the gorge, leaving the only path forward. The moon was out casting the only light the changelings had, for they dared not use magic and draw attention to themselves.
Weevil looked to the air as the sound as buzzing marked the return of the scouts. Two ninltkims landed at the edge of the camp. “Report,” Weevil ordered.
One who was almost completely purple answered. “We’ve done a sweep of one hundred meters in every direction with no signs of life.”
“Good, rest up while you can. We will be moving out soon.”
The scouts gave a salute and trotted off. She spotted Thorax on a hill not far from camp; the moonlight reflected off his yellow and green chitin. “The scouts have seen no sign of the enemy, your majesty,” Weevil informed.
Thorax continued to peer into the dark as he answered. “If you think of them as enemies you will only see enemies. Think of them as old friends.”
“Words that may do more harm than good.” Weevil said under her breath. “We are ready to move out. What are your orders?”
Thorax turned his gaze to Weevil and answered. “We will only attack if provoked. If possible I want this to end peacefully.”
“And what of Chrysalis?”
“You have your orders. Gather the others it’s time to proceed.”
Weevil felt the frustration grow in her. She didn’t want to see her comrades killed because the King wanted to make friends, but she held her tongue. It was not her place to speak out.
Not a word was spoken when the group moved into the cave. The farther in they moved the louder the dripping water from the stalactites became. The darkness was near blinding even for the adaptive eyes of changelings. “My lord,” Weevil spoke in a hush whisper. “Permission to use a light spell?”
Weevil could see Thorax hesitating. She could understand why, she wasn’t thrilled about announcing their presence without knowing the location of the changelings, but she had no idea how long they would be traveling until they found Chrysalis. Thorax gave a nod in approval.
Weevil flowed magic into her horn and focused her mind on a light spell, but instead of an illuminating aura it simply fizzled out. She stopped in her tracks; a look of confusion on her face.
“Is something wrong?” asked Thorax.
Instead of answering Weevil tried her magic once again, but was met with the same results. “I can’t use my magic.” She said, worry clear in her voice.
Weevil could feel Thorax channel his magic, and many guards around them doing the same, yet they all ended with a fizzle. Before they could contemplate what was happening battle cries erupted from all around them. “Ambush!” A Guard called.
“Protect the King!” Weevil ordered. They formed a circle around Thorax and waited for the attack. They were armed with swords and spears, but nearly half of them relied on magic to fight. They needed to get out of there but she could already hear something in the tunnel they had came from. They were truly trapped.
“Chrysalis, stop this madness! Let us talk this out.” Thorax called out, but the only answer he got were more cries of battle.
All eyes watched every direction. The ninltkims prepared themselves for an enemy charge, but failed to watch below. Holes in the ground broke away and a dozen elite guard changelings emerged inside their lines. The changelings didn’t bother with Thorax instead going straight for the ninltkim guards. Four were cut down before Weevil realized they were under attack. “Hold the line!” She called. “They don't have magic either.” As if the very Fates themselves were laughing at her a bolt of changeling fire shot past her and impacted the guard next to her.
From the very darkness of the cave changelings poured out. From every direction they attacked and slammed into the ninltkims, and Weevil watched as the line broke. Changelings and ninltkims took to the air and the walls, each one squaring off in their own dance of death. It became a chaotic free for all.
Weevil ducked low and avoided a blade aiming for her head. Her opponent let out a hiss and cried, “Die traitor!” The Changeling lunged forward his sword aiming for Weevils’ throat. She brought her sword up and parried the blow, following through she swepped her blade in an arc that should have landed a fatal blow, but the Guard nimbly avoided it. She felt the chaos of the battlefield fade from her mind as her training took over. She lashed out with a series of blows that the Changeling either blocked or outright dodged.
Weevil didn’t understand what was happening. As a ninltkim she should be stronger then her changeling counterpart, unlike them she doesn’t have to use a portion of her love for food all of it can be used to make her stronger. “Why can’t I hit him!” The thought screamed in her mind.
The Changeling flared his wings and flew into the air before swooping down at her. She barely had time to block and recover before he was swooping in for another attack. Weevil felt the sting as his blade cut into her forehoof but pushed through it, and plunged her sword into the Guard’s back hoof. He let out a cry and hit the ground, sword still embedded.
Weevil charged forward. Her forehoof screamed every time she put pressure on it, but her target was so close. In one swift motion she pulled her sword free and cleaved his head from his body.
She took in a breath and savored the taste of victory. All around her the ninltkim were being cut down some were being overwhelmed by numbers, while others were blasted apart by magic. She scanned the battlefield until she spotted Thorax, he and two guards were being attacked by a group of six, yet they were still holding their own. So overwhelmed with finding her King she forgot to watch her surroundings and never saw the green bolt of fire until it impacted her back.
She let out a cry of pain. She could feel her wings being consumed by the flames, acting fast she flipped on her back and did her best to smother the fire. When the pain when from a roaring inferno to a never ending sting she rolled back onto her hooves. She did her best to ignore the pain, telling herself her wings would grow back. Weevil held her sword in her mouth and limped as fast as she could to Thorax. He was just over thirty feet away but to Weevil it felt like miles.
Thorax bucked two of the changelings sending them flying back. “Is that all you’ve got?” Thorax yelled.
“I haven’t even begun to show you ‘what I've got’” A voice echoed through the cave but there was no mistaking that owner: Chrysalis.
A spear of magic shot from the shadows, ripping through the air, and knocking aside any poor soul that got too close. Weevil watched as Thorax looked from the spear to the ninltkim guard in its path. That spear was fast but she had seen just how fast Thorax’s reflexes were. Weevil held her breath as she watched Thorax knock the guard out of the way, and a scream was stuck in her throat when the spear impacted Thorax’s side, fracturing his chitin like a spider web. Thorax was sent flying back into the cave wall and slid down onto the ground.
Weevil’s sword fell from her mouth; she couldn’t move, yet her mind wanted to run to him but her body was locked. Whatever morale the ninltkim had it was shattered the moment Thorax fell. The few ninltkim that were left threw down their weapons and surrendered. Chrysalis strolled forth from the darkness, a wicked smile plastered on her face.
Another ninltkim gave a crazed cry the moment he saw Chrysalis. He grasped his spear from where it lay and charged at Chrysalis. What Weevil found far more alarming was the fact that none of the changelings tried to stop him.
“Oh please,” Chrysalis muttered. In a burst of magic far too fast for Weevil to see, the Guard was sent flying, his body in two different directions.
Weevil hardly noticed the changelings surrounding her. She couldn’t take her eyes off Chrysalis, but it was at that moment she realized the only thing standing in-between Thorax and Chrysalis was her. Weevil looked into Thorax’s eyes and he looked...defeated. She could only imagine what he was trying to tell her, probably to run and become an exile. Her gaze turned back to Chrysalis who stood mere feet from her. Chrysalis said nothing her mere presence was more than enough. Weevil knew in that moment she would not run; she was born to serve.”
Weevil kneeled down before the Queen, pressing her head into the ground. “Forgive me my Queen. I should have never turned against you.” Apart of her expected to feel Chrysalis’ wrath, but what she wasn’t expecting was the soft touch of Chrysalis’ hoof.
“Don’t fear young one, I’m not upset with you. No, I understand quite well why you and the others turned on me. A chance to be rid of the hunger is a tempting offer indeed.” Chrysalis place a hoof under Weevil's chin and raised her head up to meet her eyes. “And I’m sure you will be a loyal servant from now on, correct?”
“You will have my unyielding devotion, your majesty.”
“We will see, and what is your name?” Said Chrysalis.
“Weevil.” She meeped out.
“Well Weevil, let us go see your would-be-king.” Chrysalis said. Weevil couldn’t help but shudder at the way Chrysalis spoke her name. Weevil took a step forward but her injured hoof nearly made her fall forward. Chrysalis just sighed and wrapped Weevil in a green aura of magic and drug her along.
Weevil was placed with the remaining ninltkims who were grouped up a foot from Thorax, including Weevil there were only fourteen left. All eyes fell on Chrysalis no one dared to speak as she approached Thorax.
“Thorax, Thorax, Thorax, did you honestly think you could take my kingdom from me? You who has the combat potential of a love gorged recruit; who has no understanding of what it takes to be a ruler, or did you think bossing others around was sufficient. You know nothing of tactics, or of the changeling nature.” Chrysalis looked at Weevil and asked, “Weevil, how many troops did you come with?”
Weevil answered without pause. “Fifty, my Queen.” She avoided the gaze of the other ninltkims and kept her eyes on the ground.
Chrysalis’ predatory smile seemed to grow. “How cute, I brought a thousand.” Chrysalis threw her head back and laughed. “From the rumors I’ve heard you’re far more interested in being friends with Equestria then seeing to your own people, but what can you expect from one who sold out his own kind.”
Thorax held a hoof tightly against his broken side, and the way he was taking deep breaths Weevil could see he was having trouble breathing. “Our magic...how?” Thorax wheezed out.
“That was the simplest part. Didn’t you think it was strange that I wanted to meet in some strange cave halfway across my kingdom,” Said Chrysalis. She waved to the cave around her. “This cave has been a very well kept secret, only known to those in the royal caste. This is the very cave the stone for my throne was mined, although in it’s raw form the the effects are very weak, so I doubt you would have felt it outside of the cave.”
Thorax took in a breath of air and tried his best to speak, “But that should only affect non-changelings.”
Chrysalis brought her face mere inches from Thorax, as she spoke her voice dripped with venom. “Yes that’s true, but you are not a changeling.” Chrysalis stepped back and her voice calmed as she continued. “I admit, I didn’t think you would show yourself, even with the threat of war hanging over your head. If it was me I would have simply dispatched a regiment to kill whoever was here, but in the end it wouldn’t have mattered what you did. This was only one of many plans I had to deal with you. But I do want to thank you Thorax.”
“Thank...me?”
“Yes, you see after I was driven from my home I had time to think. I realized that no matter how much love I could get for my people it would never be enough, so long as there are those like you who can end their hunger for good. But as I tried to contemplate this problem I couldn’t help but think about that stupid Starlight and how all of this was her fault. The more I thought about it the angrier I became, and the angrier I became the more I thought about it, until I was a boiling inferno inside, and then I noticed something. I wasn’t hungry any more.”
Thorax shook his head in disbelief, “No, that’s not possible, friendship is the only way. With Friendship we don’t need to be enemies with the ponies anymore.”
“Oh it is. We don’t need your precious friendship, Thorax. We have found something far superior: Rage.” Chrysalis said. She looked over to the groups of changelings that stood nearby. “Every changelings here is proof that it works. Each of them has found hatred in something to quench their hunger.”
“But...but that’s wrong.”
“Who are you to say what is wrong for my people!” Chrysalis snapped out. “Enough of this, Weevil, come!”
Weevil snapped to attention and trotted to Chrysalis side, putting as little weight on her injured hoof as she could. “Yes my Queen.”
“Break his hooves.” Chrysalis said in a nonchalant manner.
“What...I don’t understand your majesty?”
Chrysalis looked at Weevil and the annoyance was clear on her face. “Break. His. Hooves. Did you not just pledge your unyielding devotion to me?”
“No...I mean I did,” Weevil stammered out. She took in a breath and started again. “I am yours to command your majesty.”
“Good, guards restrain him.”
Four auras of green magic wrapped themselves around Thorax’s legs and pulled him into an X. He cried out in clear pain, but whether it was from his legs being pulled too tight or his side Weevil wasn’t sure. She stepped up to Thorax and tried to look into his eyes but he kept his gaze locked on the ground. Weevil thought to say something but nothing came to mind. She trotted to his forehoof and rose her good hoof into the air before bringing it down with all her might.
Crack.
Thorax screamed.
She walked to the next hoof.
Crack, scream.
She walked to the next hoof.
Crack, scream.
She walked to the next hoof.
Crack, scream.
Weevil walked back to Chrysalis side, her head felt so dizzy.
Thorax was breathing heavily, tears rolled down his face, but he still found the strength to speak. “I never came back here to overthrow you. I only wanted to save the friends that you kidnapped, and show my people their was more to life then stealing love from others.
“Spoken like a true outsider. You are nothing more than a pony in sheep's clothing.” Chrysalis said. With her magic she levitated a rock, larger than Thorax’s head, into the air. “You know I had thought to add your names to the archives as Thorax the Traitor, but then I remembered: The archives are only for changelings.”
Weevil looked away unable to watch the final moment, but couldn’t stop her ears from hearing the sickening crunch.
Chrysalis turned her attention to the remaining ninltkims and looked at them as a cat would a mouse. “What to do with all of you.” She asked. “Ah yes, I know. All of you that wish to follow your captain's example and pledge your loyalty to me step to the right, and don’t worry once you learn to embrace the hatred I’m sure your old bodies will return.”
The ninltkims looked among themselves and a few of them looked to Weevil for confirmation, to which she nodded in approval. One by one the ninltkims followed the order and moved far to the right, that is except for three. Chrysalis approached the three with a look of amusement. “So I take it you three won’t be joining the others?”
The closest ninltkim spit on the ground. “Long live King Thorax!”
The smile faded from Chrysalis’ face. “That makes this simple then.” Her horn glowed for only a moment. A torrent of green fire erupted from the ground surrounding the three ninltkims and stretching all the way to the cave ceiling. Their screams echoed off the cave walls, filled with nothing but agony. Weevil covered her ears unable to bear it any longer.
The spell lasted for less than a minute but when it disappeared only a scorch mark was left. “That’s one chore down,” Chrysalis said. She turned and trotted for the exit. “Let us be off, I have a rebellion to crush. Not to mention a throne to rebuild, plotting revenge against the ponies, and what am I forgetting...oh that’s right, teaching my precious changelings the true meaning of hatred.”
Everyling followed quickly after the Queen, but Weevil lingered near the back and afforded herself one last look at Thorax’s broken remains. “I’m sorry,” She whispered to no one.
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Totally missed the dark tag before I started reading, and the Gore tag... (that's what I get for going to a story straight from my feed i guess?) But anyway wow, was not expecting that ending. Poor Thorax, his reign was so short. How could Weevil turn on him so easily like that?
still, a well done little short. Might not have liked how it ended, but then with what we have seen of Canon Chrysalis, it does seem to fit. (Much as I hate to admit it, what with her being my favourite character.)
7630785 Thanks I'm glad you liked it, more or less. With the exception of Weevil, this is basically how I imagine Thorax's reign would go. Short and with a messy end. But if it helps I don't think Chrysalis would be like that all the time.
7630817
but yeah I thought it an enjoyable read. (For example, nopony liked it when Dumbledore died, but we all mostly still love the books? That is kind of how it is for me if that makes sense?)
Yeah i can see that, from what we know of him he doesn't seem the leader type, being even more passive than Celestia(if that is even possible) so as much as I like the 'little' guy, I do have to agree with you there. And good, glad to hear you don't think of her as 'completely insane?
Interesting, when i did mine "A promise of Hate" i thought baout doing this, but i liked fitting it in with my own ideas for changeling stories instead.
7630817 except no. and more so, if she did, she would have an even shorter reign and cdelestia would outright MURDER her for such violence.
chrysalis had to rely upon the defenses of her kingdom as a means to capture and contain the alicorns............. she no longer has it. it is gone. so she would be dead.
Wow, that was dark, but rather probable.
I love the idea of harnessing anger, it's a powerful emotion. And I like that you thought out of the box and didn't show the friendship way as the only true one.
Equestria might be kind of doomed, though, the changelings are now self-powered, so they can continuously grow in power without using it up to stay alive, and they retain all their abilities.
7630785 How was Weevil's turn surprising? She was one of the changelings who betrayed the Queen without a moment of hesitation, it's clear that she has no problems switching allegiances on the fly.
7631421 Only now Chryssie is more powerful than ever, not having to use up energy to keep herself alive. And she said that she'll rebuild the throne.
7631712
True, there is that, and each brought her something she wanted in different ways(getting rid of the hunger) heh anger at her was just my initial reaction.
Not surprising. If the other changelings only did change to get rid of their hunger, then it would be a fickle loyalty. In this story they can satisfy their hunger without becoming reliant on the ponies.
7631712 cept her acting like this would be a situation where she oculd not gain that energy. cause, well, she would not have changed
also it is beyond doutful she could repair the throne. i doubt she even MADE the damn thing to begin with. more than likely it wa an artifact from days before her.
and, again, it would have to be before celestia kills her. and no, even if she is somewhat stronger than before, she is nowhere near the league of Celestia. and even if she WAS they still have luna to back her up. or just send discord because of the potential threat she is to fluttershy and the others.
this is just a 'i hate the episode so i am going to 'improve' it' story. Cept they creat a scenario that has little actual thought to it.
7632398 Why would she not gain that energy? She's changed, but without changing her look. It's clearly stated in the fic that he changelings have had the same boost in power caused by not feeling the hunger anymore as Thorax and his changelings.
There's nothing pointing at her being unable to rebuild it. She knows where the material came from, it's more than likely that the throne was built by royal changelings in the past. Her words about rebuilding it point at her knowing how to do it.
With her newfound power, Celestia wouldn't have such easy of a job. Plus, cash she even finds Chrysalis? Apparently there are other hives and they're loyal to her. She can be in any of then. She can even hide in a random cave or have he changelings dig a new hive underground. Or she can hide feel in the cave where she killed Thorax, after dealing with any transformed changelings knowing where she called him. And said cave is protected against magic other than that of the changelings. She has so many ways to evade Celestia's wrath that the very thought of Sunbutt finding her is hilarious, especially that they have no spells that can detect a changeling in disguise. She could go and sit in a cafe in Canterlot and nobody would be none the wiser. Or she could transform into any object. Without ass pulls by the writers, like those during the wedding and the finale, the array of powers changelings have and the ponies' complete lack of ways to combat them aside of Shining and Cadance using that spell, which can clean a single city at a time at best and we don't even know if it works on disguised changelings, the changelings can pretty much evade the ponies whenever they like and infiltrate their society without limits.
7632398 you're absolutely right, it's just suffering for its sake rather then an actual conflict
7631421 You know I expect people not to like this story, but I expected their arguments to be more...sensible. OK lets straighten out some of these facts.
Celestia would not murder anyone given the choice. I don't know why so many people see her as a violence killing machine. Oh something else I feel I should point out: Moving the sun =/= godlike power. (Same goes for Luna)
But even if Celestia wanted to murder Chrysalis, she would still have to declare war in order to do so, and considering she didn't declare war after the initial invasion I doubt very much she would. There is also the views of other nations to take into account, considering Equestria basically helped Thorax in a Coup d'état they could view it as anything from interfering with foreign affairs to an outright invasion. Neither Celestia or Luna would want Equestria to be view in such a light. And all of this doesn't even cover the problems with an invasion.
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Are you saying it's because Chrysalis didn't change into one of those colorful thing she would not be able to gain the power to defeat Celestia? If so that is wrong. As I explained in the story, with the new method of dealing with hunger Chrysalis will become stronger the more love she takes in.
Oh I didn't realize you wrote on the show and my story...oh you didn't. Then were are you getting this information? I clearly state in the story that it can be repaired and the show gives no hints to the contrary. It's fine if you want to use that information for your own stories, but I don't see it like that.
Chrysalis is as strong in this story as the time she defeated Celestia, I was trying to make that clear without down right saying it, and it's only up from here.
Discord doesn't care. They had to kidnap Fluttershy before he even gave it a second thought, so as long as they leave Fluttershy alone I doubt Discord will do anything.
The irony is your arguments has little actual thought put into it. But you are thinking of Fix fics, while a bit similar to what I did, they all take place during the episode itself. This is more of a episode follow up, but I won't deny that I wrote this because I hated that ending.
This was an interesting read, I liked it. Good to see that Chrysalis had realised the potential of sustainable emotional food sources, although building a society that filled with hatred is a risky business. Thanks for writing.
7667168 I'm glad you like the story.
Unfortunately, this story wasn't written with a sequel in mind, so sorry. I do have an idea for longer story similar to this one, but I have other stories I need to get caught up on first.
Interesting.... If there isn't a sequel you should definitely make one. However, if there is one and I just don't seem to see it please tell me about it and I'll take a look.
7716914 Unfortunately, this story will not be getting a direct sequel, but I do plan to write a much longer story based around this idea, a changeling civil war that is.
7717041 Okay, thank you for the quick reply!
Sorry, but this is garbage.Disregard this statement; I've changed my mind. I may not like how this story ended, but that doesn't make it garbage.
7721057 If you are going to go through the trouble of saying "It's garbage" you could at least take the time to say why.
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I'm not sure you're going to be able to take my reasons, as they're likely going to sound like RealityCheck at his most judgemental. However, since I do have dark-themed stories myself, I should at least give you my reasoning for calling this garbage.
In essence, I did not like the end because the Evil Bug Queen won, and the kind changeling lost. I know that happens all the time in real life; trouble is, I read these fics to ESCAPE from real life. When someone goes to the trouble of writing drivel- and this is an opinion of the fic, not the author -that brings real life shit on this level into the sugar bowl that is mlp, I can only see it as one thing.
The very worst of slash fiction.
Again, let me stress; this is my opinion. What I see as piss, another might see as fine wine. I may not like it, but others do.
By the way, this opinion goes beyond mlp. I don't care for Daxter for many of the same reasons; why in the hell would I want to read about the inner turmoil of a murderous sociopath?! The only thing they're good for is fertilizer.
Note: As my opinion has changed, I no longer consider this to be as bad as originally thought. I missed the subtext.
7721440 Based on how you worded everything I'm guessing you have been attacked a few times for a negative review, but don't worry I don't plan to bite your head off. I just wanted to know why you didn't like it, saying it's garbage tells me about as much as a drive by dislike.
I can understand why you would not like it, but I wouldn't consider this story garbage based on that alone. Don't get my wrong, I wouldn't exactly consider this story one of my "masterpieces," so to say. I mainly wrote this story as a way to vent my frustration about the season 6 final, as I'm sure you have guess I was not a big fan.
Anyway, thanks for giving me a reply and for reading the story in the first place.
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More like that I've seen others attacked by negative reviews. I hardly get any comments on my fics.
I should say that this story is well-written though, and I honestly shouldn't judge it based on the fact that I don't like the ending. So, I retract my 'garbage' comment, though I won't be able to retract the down vote.
And after this i remember it.
Tonight I intend to teach you how to hate.
Great story, got me goospumped keep them coming!