• Published 5th Oct 2016
  • 8,389 Views, 50 Comments

Celestia's Secret - Robo Bro



Celestia has a secret that she wishes to tell Twilight Sparkle. It is not what the love struck Twilight expected at all.

  • ...
26
 50
 8,389

The Secret

It was shortly after the Grand Galloping Gala had ended and Twilight Sparkle, princess of friendship, paced inside of Princess Celestia’s empty bedroom. She readjusted her gala dress for the millionth time in the last one hour and thirty three minutes, which seemed so odd to her since it had been so comfortable for the entire gala before now. She smoothed the feathers of her wings nearly nonstop just trying to ensure that she would be presentable, it wouldn’t do to have a stray feather out of place for this occasion. Her head snapped in the direction of every single clopping of nearby hooves, anticipating her old mentor to have finally shown up. Princess Celestia was late by a full four minutes now and she was beginning to think that she was just playing a silly little prank on her. A very cruel, silly, insignificant little, earth shatteringly mean spirited prank.

An hour and forty minutes ago, just as the Gala had been wrapping up and the never ending line of ponies seeking to meet with their country’s leader finally had been exhausted, Princess Celestia had whispered something in Twilight’s ear. She told her that she had a secret that she desperately needed to confess to her. She had asked for Twilight to meet her one and a half hours after the Gala’s end inside her bedroom and that she would bare all before her, and to ensure that nopony followed her.

Twilight had been taken completely off guard by those words. She wanted to confess a secret that was burning inside of her and demanding release? She wanted to meet her at the incredibly intimate location of her bedchambers? Alone? It seemed too good to be true.

Twilight had developed quite the school filly crush on her teacher very shortly after reaching puberty. After doing three and half weeks of study, in actual hours of study, not time passed on a calendar, she had concluded that her infatuation was nothing more than a temporary thing. Crushing on your school teacher was an incredibly common occurrence among hormonally addled teenage brains of both sexes. It was incredibly rare for such emotions to be reciprocated, and the cases where they did were almost always major scandals where the teacher’s reputation would be forever tarnished. Twilight would never have allowed for that to happen, she respected the Princess far too much for that. She had resigned herself to letting time wash away such feelings, as her research had indicated was the norm. Unfortunately for her, that didn’t happen.

Twilight’s feelings for her mentor only grew with time, the embers of love had been fanned into a raging inferno as she became an adult. Even once she had become a princess too and was no longer her pupil, she had kept her feelings secret out of fear that she would be rejected. Why would a pony as amazing as Princess Celestia ever want a pathetic little mare like her? That’s even assuming she was into mares at all. Being rejected for being the wrong sex seemed hardly any better to her, either way her heart would be torn completely in two.

That was all before she had heard those words from Celestia’s lips. Could she possibly love her in return? What else could this entire intimate confession be if not an admission of long restrained passion for her young pupil? A goofy smile spread across her face as she imagined the possibilities for the future.

Her daydreaming was cut off by the opening of Celestia’s bedroom door and the entrance of Princess Celestia herself. She stood tall and regal, her golden dress looked absolutely immaculate upon her white frame. Her crown shone atop her head, having been polished specially for the Grand Galloping Gala. Her lips were twisted into a concerned frown as she came into view, but it warped into a gentle smile as she saw Twilight standing there. She trotted forth, closing and locking the door behind her with her magic, and nuzzled Twilight lovingly. Twilight was in heaven for those precious few seconds of physical contact and was practically in a daze even after Celestia drew away from her.

“Good evening, Twilight, you have no idea how pleased I am that you have come.”

“The pleasure is all mine, Princess!” Twilight responded in a dreamy tone, the goofy grin returning to her face.

“Now now, I thought I told you that we are equals, Twilight. Just Celestia will do.”

“Yes, Celestia.” Twilight gazed up at the taller mare adoringly as she rolled that wondrous name over her tongue. She loved wrapping her tongue all over that word...Celestia.

“As I was saying, I am tremendously glad that you have come. I was afraid that you would reject my invitation.”

“I would never reject you, Celestia. I am available to you for anything at any time.”

“Thank you for that, Twilight. I see now that I was wrong to fear. I’m afraid that I have a confession to make, one that has been a long time coming. I had always hidden it from you for fear that you would revile me for it, but I can no longer keep it to myself.”

Twilight’s heart skipped a beat. Here it was! It was finally happening! Celestia would confess her love for her and they would live for eternity in pure marital bliss together. She watched as the older mare stepped towards the bed with an intoxicating mix of trepidation and anticipation. Is that what she wanted? So soon? They hadn’t even gone on a single date yet! But no, if that was what Celestia wanted, then she would do it. For her she would be the best possible lover, the societal norms for dating be damned!

Celestia turned back around and looked at the door. She used her magic to make absolute certain that it truly was locked. Satisfied that it was, she faced Twilight again as she nibbled on her lip uncertainly.

“Were you followed?”

Twilight shook her head.

“Good.” Celestia sighed, some of the tension that plagued her being released in the process.

Twilight was getting a little impatient with all the delays. She would have thought that Celestia would be much better at confessing her feelings, she would have had over a millennia of experience doing so after all. Perhaps it was something that never truly got easier. Twilight approached Celestia, hopping up on her bed so that she could be at an equal height to her future lover. Maybe she needed to be the one to make the first move. Celestia looked into Twilight’s eyes, a bit of uncertainty still evident within those dazzling pink orbs.

“I love you.”

“I’m a spy.”

The two of them spoke at the exact same time, culminating in a near impossible to understand mess of sound. Twilight, realizing her terrible mistake, clamped her mouth shut, blushed furiously and her eye began to twitch.

“I’m sorry, what did you say, Twilight?”

“Nothing!” She quickly shouted and immediately tried to steer the conversation away from her confession. “Did you just say you’re a spy?”

“Yes. I am a spy.” Celestia took a deep, calming breath and a smile of relief graced her features. “You couldn’t possibly understand how good it feels to get that off my chest, I have been keeping that secret for a very, very long time.”

“I...I don’t understand.” Twilight’s brow wrinkled with confusion. “I wouldn’t think you’d make for a very good spy.”

“And why is that?” Celestia raised an eyebrow.

“Well, you kind of stand out what with your mane flowing in a non-existent wind all the time, not to mention being much, much bigger than anypony else.” Twilight’s eyes widened as she realized her words could easily be misconstrued as an insult. “N...not that you’re fat or anything! I mean, you’re beautiful! Any mare would be lucky to have you—I mean have your body—I mean have a body like yours!”

“That’s very sweet of you to say, Twilight,” Celestia responded with a slight twinkle in her eye, “but my size and the unusual hair has hardly seemed to be a problem so far. You are the only one to know of my being a spy, and that’s only because I told you myself.”

“Are you sure? I find it hard to believe that the griffons wouldn’t notice the leader of Equestria spying on them.”

“I’m not spying on the griffons.”

“Oh, okay. The yaks?” Celestia shook her head. “The minotaurs? Changelings? Zebras? Diamond dogs? The humans on the other side of the mirror?”

Twilight grew more and more desperate with each suggestion she put forth that elicited only more shaking of Celestia’s head.

“Okay, I give up! Who are you spying on?” Twilight crossed her forelegs in a huff.

“I am spying on Equestria.”

Twilight blinked at that revelation. An awkward silence fell between the two ponies as she tried to wrap her head around the idea that Celestia was spying on her own ponies.

“What?” She deadpanned.

“I am spying on the ponies of Equestria.” Celestia repeated.

“What? Are you reading ponies’ mail to see if they want to overthrow you or something?”

“No, that’d be silly. I only read the important political documents.”

Twilight put a hoof to her face.

“That’s not spying! You’re the leader of Equestria! You’re supposed to read those!”

“It’s the perfect cover!” Celestia answered with a fair share of enthusiasm.

“You’re not a spy, you’re a politician!”

“Oh no, I am definitely a spy. I make sure to make reports on all of the important details of Equestria’s activities and send them to the head of the spy network by dragon’s fire.”

“Princess—”

“I told you to call me Celestia.”

“Celestia,” Twilight began again through gritted teeth, “you are the head of Equestria’s spy network!”

Celestia chuckled at Twilight’s words, as if she had just told a moderately funny joke.

“What’s so funny?”

“Oh, Twilight, I’m not talking about my Equestrian spy network, I’m talking about the one that sent me to spy on Equestria!”

“Wait, if you’re not spying for Equestria, then who are you spying for? The griffons?” Celestia shook her head. “The yaks?”

Celestia held up a hoof to silence her. “Let’s not do this again. I was sent to spy on Equestria for the Goat Empire by Emperor Grogar.”

“Emperor...Grogar.” Twilight repeated Celestia’s words.

“Yes.” Celestia nodded, a smile upon her lips.

“Of the Goat Empire.”

“Yes.” Celestia nodded again.

“The same Goat Empire that collapsed seven hundred years ago? That Goat Empire?!”

“The empire collapsed?” Celestia frowned. “Well, that would certainly explain why they stopped responding to my reports.”

“How could you have not noticed the Goat Empire collapsing?!”

“I’ve been very busy since I started ruling Equestria.” She paused as she tilted her head in contemplation. “It was quite the surprise when I was asked to become the leader of the very nation I was spying on. I thought it would be a tremendous opportunity for my activities as a spy, but it’s been as much a hindrance as a help. Sometimes I simply don’t have the energy to pay attention to the little things anymore.”

“There’s nothing little about the collapse of an entire empire!”

“Maybe not to one as young as you, but to one as exceptionally old and busy as I? Empires rise and fall in the time it takes my sister and I to get over a silly argument.”

Twilight sat on Celestia’s bed, her mouth hanging open as she stared into empty space, unable to even respond anymore.

“Are you okay, Twilight?”

“I...I...” Twilight stammered, but failed to get beyond that single word.

“I see this is a lot to take in.” Celestia lifted Twilight off of the bed in her golden magical aura and carried her with her to the door. “Perhaps we could meet again this time tomorrow evening?”

“I...I...”

“We can discuss things further then.” She opened the door and set her just outside of her bedroom. “I trust you will keep my secret? It would be very inconvenient for me if you told anypony.”

“I...I...”

“Perfect!” She said with a twinkle in her eye and a mischievous smile. “Oh, and Twilight?”

“Huh?” Twilight finally snapped out of her stupor and looked up at her ex-mentor.

Celestia leaned down and kissed Twilight on the lips, it was a gentle, quick peck.

“I love you too.” She whispered in her ear right before retreating behind her bedroom door.

Twilight stared at that closed door for several silent seconds. She could still feel Celestia’s soft lips upon her own and her warm breath upon her ear. Her eyes darted back and forth, as if she were reading invisible notes that she had taken on the entire encounter. Having completed her mental examination, she cried out in both frustration and confusion.

“What in Celestia’s sacred sun just happened?!”

Author's Note:

Just a silly idea that I got from one of those birthday games you can find on Derpibooru, one that told me "Princess Celestia confesses to you that she is a spy". I hope you guys enjoyed this little one shot.

Comments ( 50 )

Perfection.

Well, that was fun.:pinkiesmile:

i was betting the princess was going to say "i am your mother" but being a spy who does reaslise the empire she work for is gone, would have been funny if it was the pony who army under her control that put it down

That was pulled off in the most amazing way. Thumbs up here.

Well, Celestia certainly has the spying down to a pat. Nobody would ever know.
And quite a way to confess her love. Confuse them first, then strike when they're off balance!
She probably started that plan way before Twilight confessed, and was determined to see it through, no matter how silly it was.
Oh well, Celestia got it off her chest, Twilight's feelings are returned. Win-win!

wlam #6 · Oct 6th, 2016 · · ·

I'll give you that much: this definitely was not the secret I was expecting.

Wait, does that make Rainbow Dash right by extension? Celestia is a spy. Twilight reports to Celestia. Does that mean Twilight is a spy transitively?

I'm with Twilight.
What the f did I just read? :derpyderp2:

That right there is some master-class breaking the ice. :trollestia:

Trollestia strikes again :trollestia:. And I've got to agree with 7621878 , that's some master level ice breaking alright :raritywink:

This is pure gold!

7621720
Yes. Yes it does.

7622551

Damn, you beat me to it.

7622618
Everything I know is a lie! :raritycry:

I think it was all an elaborate cover so that the ending wouldn't be spoiled.

Which is a very spy thing to do!

How clever, Celestia.

Too clever... :trixieshiftright:

She stood tall and regal, her golden dress looked absolutely immaculate upon her white frame.

Or did she stand tall and regal, her blue dress looking absolutely immaculate upon her black frame?

I'msorrynotsorry:rainbowlaugh:

7623932
:facehoof::rainbowlaugh: I see what you did there.

7623932
...you know, now I'm honestly wondering if Luna's and Celestia's respective color schemes may just be a massive joke that nobody has picked up on yet.

I don't know why but I was laughing throughout some parts of the story. All in all, it was perfection. :ajsmug::rainbowlaugh:

I was totally expecting Celestia to reveal that she had feelings for one of Twilight's friends. This was much funnier.

The "sex"-tag is misleading... I approve. :pinkiehappy:

7624858

As said in the description, it's there for only mild (emphasis on mild) innuendo and references. Mostly from Twilight early in the story. It's only rated teen, it's not like you'd find clop in it.

7623932

Took me a moment to realize what you were doing there...and now I'm going to be wondering on this all day. :unsuresweetie:

*snrk* that was great

7624236 :pinkiegasp:

You know what this means?


Celestia isnt really the older sister!

They're twins!

7623932

Empires rise and fall in the time it takes my sister and I to get over a silly argument.

derpicdn.net/img/2015/4/5/865814/medium.png

Fun little silly story.

I freaking loved this story. I especially enjoyed reading the comments that popped up from it.

LADY WAIT, SHE TRIED TO CLONE HERSELF!!

7621878
7622045
If anypony would know how to break the ice, it's the Alicorn of the Sun. :trollestia:
Welp, that sounds like Agent 707 breaking down my front door again. I'll send you a card from the Royal Pun-geon. I regret nothiiiiiiing!

(Ten bro(w)ny points if you know who Agent 707 is)

7622551 If you didn't post this, I was going to have to.

7625058 I suppose that might stand under scrutiny, maybe, but don't think it really needs the 'sex' tag for that.

Honestly, I thought it was part of the joke, give the reader false expectations, which I thought was pretty brilliant :rainbowlaugh:

I can't tell if Celestia was being serious about being a spy or told that to Twilight to break the ice so that their love confession wouldn't be awkward.

Regardless, a silly idea and I loved it.

Have a like.

Hilarious, and made 20% cooler by the Grogar reference. :rainbowlaugh:

7631834

To be honest, I'm not completely certain, either. Troll, or sincere? It may never be answered.

Lmao, great read! Good job!! :twilightsmile:

7624236

And no-one will understand until the third sister is introduced, who's predominant color is red :P

I reviewed this story as part of Read It Now Reviews #97.

My review can be found here.

7682162

Okay, thanks for letting me know and thanks for the review, even if it was a negative one.

What the what?

Hilarious, too hilarious indeed.

Trollestia at her finest...I think:twilightoops:

are you a spy?!?

9590108
Shhhh! Nobody's supposed to know!

Celestia took a big risk there. Would have taken forever to get the brain matter cleaned from the sheets.

I just love this 🤣❤️

So Celestia has been a spy for over 1000 years spying on Equestria than became the ruler of Equestria basically spying on herself and she's still spying on Equestria 700 years later after not even noticing that the empire she was spying for collapsed!? WHAT!!??!

Well this is the biggest plot twist I have ever read on this site. (For now)

I was expecting something completely different, I was expecting a plot twist but this was something else.
I heard of spies and ponies spying on Equestria doesn't sound far fetched by the very ruler of Equestria spying on her own nation? Well that's unheard-of.

Login or register to comment