New Year's Eve
It was one of those days where I woke up early. The kind where I could tell right away what kind of day was in store. In this case, something in the air told me a good day was coming up. Well, I grabbed breakfast, adding another of the Hooves family muffins to spice it up. I finished that delight soon enough, but with the early wake-up came the realization that I had some extra time before work this morning. Since I just felt like moving about instead of sitting still, I wandered about the house a bit. As I trod through my living room, which still faintly sparkled from the cleaning Moonlight had given it, I thought on how relaxing a good, brisk walk was. Walking and jogging were the most tolerable exercises for me, and Bon Bon had already tried encouraging Lyra to take walks with her in the evening, so that should fit in nicely with the diet plans we were making. After a while, I took a glance down at my watch. It was now around the time I would usually head out the door for work, so I geared up and left.
On the way to Bon Bon’s, as I entered the marketplace, I spotted Fluttershy and Rarity walking together. Rarity was talking heatedly about something that some mare had apparently said that rubbed her the wrong way, while Fluttershy was merely nodding whenever she paused. The gentle pegasus seemed content merely to listen rather than speak, while Rarity was more than capable of filling in any gaps in conversation.
They were drawing closer as Rarity prattled on, but when they finally took notice of me once we were level, they stopped, and Rarity clammed up at once
“Hello, ladies,” I said, genially.
I was expecting a ‘hello’ back, but instead, Fluttershy enveloped me in a warm embrace, while Rarity looked on with a mixture of surprise and amusement on her face. Fluttershy was surprisingly strong for somepony of her slender build.
“Thank you so much, Dave,” she said. “How did you find out I really wanted to see Octavia’s concert?”
“Oh, lucky guess, I suppose,” I said, innocently.
“Ohh,” Fluttershy said, suddenly looking concerned. “I just hope I didn’t keep some other pony who really wanted to go from going. It would be better if there were lots of seats left over...Oh no! That wouldn’t be fair to Octavia, then. She deserves a full audience...Oh, I’m just being ridiculous, aren’t I? I’m sorry, Dave.”
“What she means to say, Dave, is ‘Thank you’,” Rarity interjected.
“Yes, that.”
“You’re welcome, Fluttershy,” I said. “And thank you for the cookbook. I’ve been looking through it, and the recipes in it look great! Don’t even get me started on the desserts!”
Although, if I was going to go on this diet with Bon Bon and Lyra, I was going to have to refrain from looking at them, lest I get the urge to binge.
Fluttershy smiled.
“I particularly prefer the dandelion cheesecake,” she said, “but Angel prefers the mint leaf cookies.”
She then released me, only for Rarity to take over with a much more sedate embrace.
“You darling, thoughtful boy,” she said. “I had no idea you knew I was in need of vermillion silk, and you even got it from Le Roche’s, no less!”
“I’m glad you like it,” I said. “Thanks for the new clothes, by the way. Incidentally, how did you know I like fedoras?”
“Call it a lady’s intuition,” said Rarity. “I saw how well you looked in a top hat and deerstalker, so a fedora was right up your alley.”
“Well, I greatly appreciate it, milady,” I said, as Rarity released me. “Where are you two off to?”
“The spa, naturally,” said Rarity. “A dip in the hot tub is just what’s needed on a day like today, though I daresay it’ll get much colder mid-January.”
“And afterwards,” said Fluttershy, “I was going to stock up on some long-lasting feed for my animal friends. Once they wake up from hibernation and return from the south, they’ll need plenty of nourishment.”
“That’s good,” I said. “Well, I hope you have a great time in Canterlot.”
“Thank you, Dave, and I hope you do at the party tomorrow.”
I blinked.
“Party? What party?”
“You didn’t know?” Rarity asked. “Pinkie Pie-”
But Rarity suddenly stopped mid-sentence, and looked as if she was staring at a ghost right behind me. I whipped around...but there was no one there.
“You all right, Rarity?” I asked.
“I thought I saw...Er, *ahem* yes. I’m quite fine, Dave.”
“Ooookay, then,” I said, uncertainly. “Well, I should get going. See you, ladies.”
“Goodbye, Dave.”
“Ta!”
The two resumed their journey to the spa, Rarity picking up where she left off in her gossip, while I continued onwards to work. However, I had barely gone more than a few steps when a familiar, throaty voice called after me.
“Good morning, Dave! I wanted to say ‘Thank you’ for your gift on Hearth’s Warming Day!”
Only one equine I knew spoke like that, and sure enough, turning around allowed me to behold a smiling Zecora, who was wearing a thicker cloak than the one I’d usually seen her wearing, and which was a forest green rather than an earthy brown.
“Hey, Zecora! I’m glad you liked it. I thought it suited you pretty well.”
“It adds a nice touch to my decor arrangement,” said Zecora, before adopting a more puzzled tone, ‘but why give me a mask that stands for ‘engagement’?”
A hot rush of embarrassment and shock ran through me at these words. Engagement?! As in, engaged to be married?! But Mr. Bric-a-Brac told me it meant friendship and companionship! How could an antiques dealer have gotten something like that wrong?!
“Engagement?” I stammered. “Zecora, I had no idea-! I mean, I think you’re a great friend, but-”
But Zecora broke into a chuckling laugh, and I felt my embarrassment and anxiousness ebbing away.
“I was only joking around, my dear human boy,” she laughed. “Your mask means friendship, and brings me much joy.”
What was it with these ponies messing with me? Maybe I was just an easy target, but at least it wasn’t mean-spirited. Zecora obviously had meant no malice by it. I did, however, make a mental note adding her to my list of known pranksters.
“Good,” I said. “And thanks for the wind chimes. Did you make them yourself?”
I made another mental note to hang those chimes up one of these days.
“I did indeed craft them by hoof,” said Zecora. “The wood is long-lasting and weather-proof. I hope when they ring, you will think of me, in my home deep in the Everfree.”
“Zecora,” I said, kindly, “how could I ever forget about you? You saved my life the first time we met. That’s not something you can easily forget.”
Wait a minute. That rhymed. Now she had me doing it! Zecora, however, contented herself with a grin.
“I am glad to hear that. It warms my heart. Until next time, then. For now, I depart.”
“All right. See you, Zecora.”
As I took leave of the zebra, I couldn’t help thinking back to that day she’d found me bleeding, threatened by timberwolves, looking for a lost and lonely filly. However, I didn’t really have time to reminisce. I was getting close to running late, so I picked up the pace.
***
That day at Bon Bon’s passed routinely, without further visits from thankful ponies. The one big difference was in Lyra. Bon Bon had given her a couple books to read about successful Equestrian diets and the effects they had produced. Lyra’s spirits didn’t seem at all bolstered by these success stories. On the contrary, she mumbled and grumbled from the time I walked in, and made faces every time Bon Bon turned her back. Finally, Bon Bon got fed up with the grumbling.
“Lyra, will you knock it off?” she asked. “It’s just a simple diet.”
“But I don’t wanna diet, and I don’t need to diet!” whined Lyra. “Why do I have to starve myself?”
“Oh, don’t be ridiculous,” said Bon Bon, impatiently. “I’m not asking you to starve yourself. I’m not that cruel. Just a few pounds off the tummy, that’s all.”
Lyra only made a derisive ‘Hmph!’ noise and turned her back on her friend, facing me instead.
“Listen to this, Dave. Bonnie won’t let me use her radio until I lose 10 pounds! That’s cruel and un-equine torture!”
“It’s so you don’t spend every night parked next to it on the couch,” said Bon Bon, firmly.
“Come on, Dave, talk some sense into her!” Lyra pleaded.
(Oh, please keep me out of this.)
“Er, so, Bon Bon,” I said, trying to divert the topic, “I know I said the three of us could diet together, but did you honestly want to take part? You look in fine shape to me.”
“Well, thank you, Dave,” said Bon Bon, “but it’s not entirely my weight I’m concerned about.”
She cast a sidelong glance at Lyra, who had just pulled her tongue back into her mouth.
“What is it, then?” I asked.
“The other day, Lyra broke one of our chairs when she sat in it. I know it’s been a while since she left her boarding school in Canterlot, but she really needs to keep healthy somehow, or she could have problems down the line.”
“I see,” I said, gravely.
Lyra said nothing, but the resentment had faded from her face, replaced with a thoughtful, sad expression. It looked as if Bon Bon’s words had actually left an impact on her. She looked up at her best friend.
“Bonnie,” she began, apologetically, but Bon Bon cut her off, stepping over and draping a foreleg around her shoulders.
“It’s all right,” she said, gently. “We’re going to get through this together.”
“Exactly,” I said, leaning down and putting an arm around Lyra from her other side. “And I’ll be right there with you.”
Lyra smiled, apparently mollified by the comforting words of her two close friends, and hugged the both of us in turn. Of course, that was when she turned to me with a smirk and said,
“Maybe in the beginning, but I’ve seen you running, and your stamina could really use some work. Don’t worry, though. Your Auntie Lyra’s gonna stick with this to the bitter end.”
I was pretty sure we weren’t related, but I felt it was best to just roll with it, since she was in a good mood again.
***
Actually, there was one other thing of note that happened that day. At around 3, Pinkie arrived with her sisters.
“Hi, Davie!” said Pinkie.
“Hey, Pinkie, Marble, Limestone,” I said. “What brings you around here?”
“We just came to say goodbye, Dave,” said Marble.
“Goodbye?” I asked, puzzled.
“We’re heading back to the rock farm tonight,” said Limestone.
“Oh,” I said, feeling a little disappointed. “You’re not going to stay for New Year’s?”
“We wish we could,” said Marble, “but we promised Mom, Dad, and Grammy that we’d be back by New Year’s Eve.”
“We’re sorry we couldn’t spend a lot of time with you,” said Limestone. “Feels like both times we’ve met, we only see you a little bit.”
“Oh, no no,” I insisted. “This was about you spending time with Pinkie, and I was more than happy to oblige. I hope you all had fun.”
“We sure did!” said Pinkie.
“Of course,” said Marble, smiling. “Thanks so much for arranging this for us, Dave.”
“Yeah, thanks,” said Limestone. “You’ll always be welcome to stop by the rock farm if you’re in the area.”
“I’ll keep that in mind,” I said.
“Oh!” said Pinkie, suddenly. “Before I forget, Davie, I’ve got something for you, Lyra, and Bon Bon. Rarity won’t get to spoil it, either!”
She actually stuck a hoof into her mane and began digging around inside it, sticking her tongue out in concentration. I could hear her hoof rustling about inside the tangle of hair, but I also heard clinking and jingling noises that made it sound like she kept everything that should have been in one’s pockets in her mane or tail. At last, she pulled out, perfectly intact, a sealed card and handed it to me. Pinkie then went to Lyra and Bon Bon, performing the same search through her mane for them. Flipping mine open, I read the following message, written in very loopy writing:
“You’re invited to Pinkie Pie’s New Year’s Eve Bash!
Where: Sugarcube Corner
When: December 28, 8:00 P.M.
What: Food, games, music, dancing, welcoming the new year”
A New Year’s party? Headed by Pinkie? That sounded like fun!
“Thanks, Pinkie,” I said, appreciatively. “With you at the helm, it’s bound to be great.”
Pinkie smiled squeakily.
“Well, Dave, so long,” said Marble.
“Hope to see you again soon,” said Limestone.
“Same to you two,” I said, reaching out to shake their hooves. “Safe travels, both of you.”
With that, the Pie sisters exited the shop, while Lyra and Bon Bon eagerly discussed the upcoming party.
***
New Year’s Eve had finally arrived, though it was still odd for me to be celebrating it on the 28th of the month, and the town was buzzing about the festivities. Even inside the shop, customers were in high spirits, prepared to stay up all night at Pinkie’s party. It also happened to be my last day working at the shop. I was somewhat sad at the season being over, but I did have another job, and I was sure that with a new year, would come new assignments from Ironmane. I could certainly use the extra free time to deal with them.
At last, 6 o’clock rolled around. We locked up together one last time, then Bon Bon handed me a bag containing my final wages. It was a bit smaller than normal, probably because of my two days off.
“Thanks, Bon Bon,” I said, appreciatively. “Again, I’m really glad I could help you and Lyra out.”
Bon Bon smiled, and Lyra reared up and gave me an affectionate squeeze.
“Feel free to stop by if you wanna hang out,” she said. “And keep up on that piano practicing, got it?”
“Of course,” I said, ruffling her mane. “I’ve got more time to practice now, after all.”
“That’s the spirit,” said Lyra, letting go of me. “We’ll see you at Sugarcube Corner, all righty?”
“Gotcha. See you two in a couple hours.”
I’ll admit, I felt a twinge of regret as I stepped away from the shop, knowing I wouldn’t be working here again, and that I’d only be a customer the next time I came. Well, maybe it was for the best that I reduced my visits for the time being, for the sake of the diet.
I arrived at home to wash up and change my clothes for the party. I wasn’t going to go all out, since it was a Pinkie party, not a soiree like Rarity would rather attend, but I figured it was a good time to break out my new fedora. I stood looking at myself in the bathroom mirror with it perched on my head. Kinda foolish, I know, but it made me wonder if Linkara felt the same way whenever he wore his trilby.
I still had some time to kill, so I sat down at my new piano and tried to play something. Needless to say, I was still pretty dreadful. Even after testing out which key was where, I still had to master reading sheet music. I’d have to bring that up at my next lesson. I was glad no one could hear me as I played, and that only I had to endure my musical mangling. I prayed that no one else knew I was practicing and didn’t make me play something at the party, if that was even an option.
***
7:30 rolled around, and I figured that was time enough to head over to the party, even if it meant taking my time. I didn’t want to be too early. Just as I was stepping out, Moonlight’s door opened, and she stepped out. Once again, it took a moment to register, but I noticed something different about her. She had changed her mane-style yet again, swapping her pigtails for bangs and one braid draped over her neck. It was a nice look for her.
“Moonlight!” I called.
“Oh!” she said, upon spying me. “Hello, Dave! Happy New Year!”
“Same to you!” I said. “You look really nice. Did you change your mane?”
“I did, actually. I just decided on it today.”
I saw her eyes travel up me to the top of my head, resting on my hat.
“Nice hat,” she complimented.
“Thanks. It was a gift from Rarity. Were you on your way to the party?”
“Yep!” said Moonlight. “Were you?”
“Yeah. Shall we go together?”
“All right.”
So, side by side, the two of us left our little neighborhood and started the walk toward Ponyville.
***
Sugarcube Corner was already packed with ponies by the time we arrived, and plenty noisy to boot. Music was playing, ponies were laughing, eating, drinking, and talking. I could pick out most of my Ponyville friends, including Lyra and Bon Bon, Berry, Derpy, Sparkler, Big Mac, Magnum, Pearl, Minuette, Zecora, Cheerilee, Screwball, Twilight, Spike, Applejack, Rarity, Rainbow Dash, and Pinkie. Fluttershy and Vinyl were absent, obviously because they were both in Canterlot. Mr. and Mrs. Cake were bringing out cakes and pastries from the kitchen, balancing trays precariously on their heads and backs and setting them down with expert ease.
“Dave!” called Mr. Cake, setting down his current cargo. “How are you, kiddo?”
“Pretty good, Mr. Cake,” I said, heading over.
“Thanks for the bungee seats for the foals. They can’t get enough of them. Look!”
He pointed to a corner of the bakery, where Pound and Pumpkin were indeed bouncing up and down in the bungee seats I had gotten for them, squealing with delight while Pinkie supervised with a big grin on her face.
“Aww, that’s so adorable,” said Moonlight. “That was so thoughtful of you, Dave.”
“Well, you know…” I said, modestly.
“We’d ordered your gift, but it was put on backorder,” said Mr. Cake, apologetically. “The four of us were visiting relatives, you see.”
“Don’t worry about it, Mr. Cake,” I said. “I understand.”
“Davie! Moonlight!” called Pinkie, bouncing over to us. “ Nice hat, Davie! Nice manedo, Moonlight! Glad you both could make it!”
“I wouldn’t miss a Pinkie party for the world,” I said.
“Me neither,” said Moonlight.
“Only 4 more hours until the new year!” Pinkie said, eagerly. “I can hardly wait!”
Pinkie then hopped away to go mingle with some ponies, and before I knew what was happening, I felt somepony grab me and drag me backwards. Next thing I knew, Applejack had me in a hug that, while warm, still made me feel like my ribs were about to be tenderized.
“Been hopin’ to see ya, sugar,” she said. “Thanks a heap for the new lasso rope. How’d ya know I needed one?”
“Oh, let’s just say I’ve got my sources,” I said. “Thanks for the cookware, by the way. It gives me a lot more to work with.”
“Yer welcome, hun. Granny sends her thanks for the hoofwarmers, too.”
“Oh, she couldn’t make it?”
“Nah. She ain’t too good with stayin’ up late. She threw her own celebration in the kitchen before we left, sayin’ it was ‘midnight somewhere’.”
The two of us had a good chuckle over that, and Applejack released me, only for Big Mac to clap me on the shoulder, nearly sending me into the floor.
“Thanks for the jersey, Dave,” he said. “Ah love it.”
“You’re welcome, Big Mac,” I said, tenderly rubbing my shoulder. “Magnum told me he likes the one I got him too.”
“So Ah heard. You got jerseys for the whole gang, Ah hear. Now that’s the kinda team spirit Ah like to see.”
“You and yer bowlin’ league,” Applejack said, rolling her eyes playfully.
The two Apple siblings then went to go mingle, and I decided to do likewise. Moonlight was talking to Rainbow Dash and Twilight, probably discussing Daring Do, and it was then that I spotted my four fellow Crusaders. They looked as energetic as ever, and when they spotted me, they zipped over to stand before me.
“Hi, Dave!” they chorused.
“Cool hat!” said Dinky.
“Evening, girls. How did ice skating go?”
“Not too badly,” said Sweetie Belle. “I was at least able to keep on my skates.”
“Me too,” said Scootaloo, “but then Apple Bloom tripped us all up and we went straight into the snow.”
“Only cuz Ah was tryin’ to save Dinky from fallin’!” Apple Bloom retorted.
“Nuh-uh!” said Dinky. “I was saving you! You had jelly legs the minute you touched the ice!”
“Did not!”
(Sounds about as successful as my own skating experience.)
“So you four plan on staying awake all night?” I asked.
“Of course!” said Scootaloo. “We’re ready for it!”
“And with the kinda refreshments Pinkie Pie makes for her parties, it’ll be a cinch!” said Apple Bloom.
Now that I got a closer look at them, their eyes were a bit wilder-looking than usual, and their smiles were bigger than normal, perhaps even a little crazed.
(Hmm...Maybe I should stay away from the punch. Who knows how long this diet might have to last after a cup of that.)
“Come on!” said Sweetie Belle. “They’re starting a game of Pin the Tail on the Pony!”
The four fillies scampered off, leaving me to myself again. A game of Pin the Tail on the Pony was indeed in progress, and a blindfolded stallion had already succeeded in pinning it on the pony’s back, making it look like a deformed wing. I remembered when I’d made mine look like half of a mustache.
“Dave! Over here!”
Berry was waving for me to join her at the punch bowl. Well, I couldn’t exactly reject her invitation, so I went up to her.
“How are you doing, Berry?”
“Great! I love parties! Especially when I can provide my own refreshment! Check it out!”
She indicated the row of beverages set out. There was the punch bowl, bottles of fizzy apple cider, grape juice, apple juice, and set apart from the others, labelled under ‘Adults Only’, a row of bottles filled with a sparkling, golden liquid.
“Golden Griffon Wine!” said Berry, proudly. “Just made it yesterday! It’s getting its grand tasting tonight! Wanna sip?”
She wasn’t serious, was she?”
“Er…”
“Ha! Just kidding,” said Berry, nudging my arm. “You’re better off with the softer stuff. Leave the hard stuff to the professionals.”
“Uh, yeah, sure,” I said.
(And you’re as professional a drinker as they come, or I’m very much mistaken.)
“As a matter of fact, I’m feeling a bit parched at the mo. Lemme get ya something too.”
She ladled a cup full of grape juice and handed it off to me, before grabbing one of her Golden Griffon bottles. She poured herself half a glass of this, then gulped it down in one swig. As I sipped my glass, I saw her face go from satisfaction, licking her lips, to a dreamy kind of bliss.
“Hoo, man, that’s the stuff,” she said. “Those griffons grow some sweet grapes, lemme tell ya.”
“Let’s just hope you don’t go overboard on the stuff,” I muttered to myself, draining my glass.
***
It was as wild and fun a party as I had imagined it could be. It was only missing two things that would have made it even better. The first was Vinyl’s music. In its place, Pinkie had hired a troop of ponies who could play the piano, percussion, trumpet, and tuba, setting up silly but lively tunes as a backdrop. The second was Trixie’s magic. I saw that, in its place, Twilight had gathered a group of foals, and was performing feats with her own magic, intercut with what I could only guess was a long-winded lecture on the magic involved. During these bits, I could see the foals’ attention wane into boredom. Spike didn’t look very happy either, and I heard him mutter, “I asked her, I begged her, but does she listen?”
The Crusaders were still running about, whooping and shrieking with laughter. I was on tenterhooks the whole time, and I made ready to dash toward them if they looked like they were close to knocking someone over or breaking something. Luckily, they somehow managed to keep their behavior confined to playing wild games of tag or other such games, weaving in and out of ponies’ legs. Still, it didn’t help that their sisters or parents didn’t seem to be paying much mind to them. I understood that questing for cutie marks was something ponies needed to be left to their own devices for, but what were they trying to accomplish? Cutie Mark Crusaders Sugar Junkies?
Berry wasn’t faring much better by way of behavior, either, although her Golden Griffon wine was receiving praise. Every time I saw her, she was drinking further from a bottle of spirits, and it was only a matter of time before she did something really stupid. Indeed, the first sign of her reaching dangerous levels of inebriation came when a sudden shout rent the party air.
“CALLOOH CALLAY!”
Many heads turned, mine included. Berry was swaying where she was, a pleased, goofy grin on her face. Somehow, she caught sight of me.
“Dave! C’mere! I gotta tell ya something!”
(Oh God.)
Ponies’ eyes fell on me as I made my way up to the refreshment table, wishing I knew how to vanish on the spot. As soon as I approached her, she reared up, threw a foreleg around me and clasped me to her side.
“Ah, Dave, I’m glad you’re here!” she said, mussing my hair under my hat with her other hoof. “We’ve got so much to talk about!”
“Like what?” I asked, warily.
“Anything! Or maybe just nothing at all! Doesn’t matter to me, cuz you’re my buddy, buddy! *Hic!* Whoopsie!”
She giggled. This was getting exceedingly embarrassing, so I tried to pry her off of me as gently as I could.
“Listen, Berry, I don’t want to sound rude, but I think you’re getting a little...you-know-what.”
“Ah, don’t be ridiculous, Dave,” said Berry, waving an airy hoof. “If I was drunk, could I do this?”
Quite suddenly, she began to dance in a wild kind of quick-step, where she teetered and threatened to trip all throughout. Still, she finally stopped and raised her forelegs as if to say ‘Ta-da!’ Several ponies started laughing and cheering, and I heard Rainbow Dash yell,
“I’ll have whatever she’s been drinking!”
“Rainbow Dash!” chided the unmistakable voice of Rarity.
“Berry, for heaven’s sake!” I hissed. “There are children at this party too!”
I might as well have been talking to a wall, for all the good it did. All of a sudden, Berry turned her attention away from me and clambered on top of the table. It didn’t help that this put her rump right in my line of vision, and I quickly stepped to the side.
“Attention, everypony!” she called. “I’d just like to say a few words!”
Everypony’s eyes were on her, some looking amused, others concerned. She cleared her throat, paused, cleared her throat again, paused again. It looked like she didn’t remember whatever drunken thought was swimming in her brain. At last, she let out a loud, squeaky hiccup. There was a brief silence, followed by polite applause and more snickering.
“Thank you!” crowed Berry, undeterred. “And now I’m feelin’ sleepy.”
Then, without warning, and without a change in her expression, she toppled forward off the table and onto her face. There, she promptly began to snore, and ponies returned to the party’s hubbub. As for me, I dragged her to a safe corner out of the way, where she slumbered on, peacefully. Maybe when she woke up, she’d have slept some of that drunkenness off.
***
11 o’clock had just passed, and some ponies were already beginning to show signs of tiredness. The Crusaders were still as energized as ever, but some of the older ponies had started yawning, though they were still chatting it up eagerly. Pinkie seemed to have anticipated this, as the next thing any of us knew, she was standing on a stage set up near her ensemble, waving her forelegs for everypony’s attention.
“Hey, everypony! We’ve only got an hour until New Year’s, and I think it’s time we start shaking our hoove thangs!”
She accompanied this with a silly sway of her pudgy hips, earning some chuckles from the crowd.
“I would call this the Hold-Your-Elbows-Out-Squeeze-Your-Knees-Together-and-Jump-Around Dance, but that’d be crazy, cuz it’s really called the Fun Dance! Partner up, everypony, cuz it takes two to do the Fun Dance!”
Ponies everywhere began to partner up with somepony else. I saw Lyra with Bon Bon (big surprise), Rainbow Dash with Applejack, Rarity with Twilight, and so on. Even Screwball had managed to get a partner in Zecora. I was looking around to see who was gonna partner with me when, all of a sudden, a foreleg looped around my arm, and I saw Moonlight beaming up at me.
“Hello, partner,” I said, genially.
“Hi, partner,” she replied. “Do you have any idea what Pinkie’s planning?”
“Believe me, Moonlight, I never know what goes on in that head of hers.”
“Ok, everypony!” Pinkie went on. “Here’s what you do. First, you hold your elbows out like a chicken. That’s ‘Oh, elbows to your partner’.”
As the band began to play a simple, polka-like accompaniment, Pinkie arched her forelegs in an imitation of chicken’s wings, bobbing along to the tune. We all tried to mimic her, and saw that the trick was to connect elbows with each other. Ok, simple enough.
“Now, back to back, and squeeze your knees together, like this. ‘Your knees against the wall’.”
Pinkie squatted down, jutting her knees out in time with the music, as if she were using a Thighmaster. We all went back to back, attempting the same maneuver. We must have looked so stupid doing this.
“Now straighten back up and link each other’s hooves. ‘If you don’t have fun at Pinkie’s tonight’.”
We all straightened up, some of us having more difficulty than others, and linked hooves, still bobbing in time with the tune. I clasped Moonlight’s hooves in my hands, and she gave me an amused smile.
“This is kinda fun already,” she said.
“Yeah,” I said, “and there’s something familiar about it.”
“And finally,” Pinkie said, “forelegs across each other’s shoulders and hop about. ‘You’ll never have fun at all’.”
All of us did as she asked, clasping each other to each other’s sides and hopping along with the music, as if we were in some kind of drunkard’s dance.
“That’s it!” said Pinkie, cheerfully. “You’ve got it! Now let’s put it all together! Hit it, boys!”
The music started up, and all at once, everypony broke into the chorus Pinkie had been demonstrating during each move of the dance.
“Oh, elbows to your partner
Your knees against the wall
If you don’t have fun at Pinkie’s tonight,
You’ll never have fun at all!”
Everypony cheered, and Pinkie beamed. Then, she waved her hoof at the band again, and they started up the tune anew. Breaking into a jig, she sang,
“Oh, the brave explorer, he was there
His knees began to shake
Because the rope he thought he held
Turned out to be a snake!”
Following this, she signaled to the crowd, who broke into the chorus once more. After that, one by one, ponies took their place on stage to supply their own nonsensical lyrics similar to hers, each one compounded by everyone breaking into the chorus. It was a lot of fun, and Moonlight was practically giddy with laughter. I still felt like I’d heard this kind of song before.
***
I don’t even know how long the singing and dancing lasted, since we eventually moved from the Fun Dance to other silly songs and dances, but a couple things happened at once that drew my attention away from it. The first was seeing Berry awake again, looking drowsy and messy-maned. The second was seeing Pinkie hopping back on stage.
“Hey, everypony! Guess what! It’s almost time!”
The music stopped, and everyone turned their attention to the big clock that had been put up on the wall. It was now 11:59. A round of excited talk started up. Moonlight and I exchanged gleeful looks. It was almost time!
“Count down with me, everypony!” said Pinkie. “10!”
“9!”
“8!”
“7!”
“6!”
“5!”
“4!”
“3!”
“2!”
“1!”
“HAPPY NEW YEAR!!”
There was a loud *boom!* as Pinkie’s party cannon went off somewhere, showering us all with confetti. Moonlight whooped and cheered at my side, flapping her wings so fast they were a blur. All at once, ponies began to sing, and I felt like I knew where this was going. Without even noticing what it was they were singing, I launched into Auld Lang Syne.
It was only after I’d begun singing for about half a minute that I realized I was the only one singing. Looking around, I saw that everypony’s eyes were on me, looking puzzled. With a rush of embarrassment, it became clear to me that Auld Lang Syne was not a traditional pony song.
“A-heh-heh,” I chuckled. “Sorry. Didn’t realize that wasn’t a song you sang here. Very popular back home. Please, carry on. I’ll just be...over here.”
“I liked the part about the pint cup!” came Berry’s voice through the silence.
(Of course you would, Berry.)
I shuffled off in a random direction, and after a moment or two, the song the ponies had been singing started up again. I went to the window and gazed out at the night sky, watching the stars being peppered with the explosions of fireworks. The Crusaders, meanwhile, had accomplished their mission of staying up late, and had now conked out by the refreshment table, before their families kindly moved them to a more comfortable spot where they wouldn’t be tripped on.
(Well, that could have gone better. Way to jump the gun, Dave.)
“Hey, Davie!”
I jumped. Pinkie had bounced up right beside me.
“Oh, hey, Pinkie.”
“What was that song you were singing?”
“Oh, that? It’s called Auld Lang Syne. It’s what we humans sing on New Year’s to celebrate. It’s about the days gone by.”
“Ohh.”
Pinkie settled beside me at the window, gazing out at the fireworks as well.
“I think a lot about the days gone by,” she said.
“You do?”
“Uh-huh. Most of the best parties I throw are all about celebrating the past. And since we’re supposed to think back on the last year, and how fun it was, I was also thinking about you!’
“You were?”
“Yep! It seems like only yesterday that you forgot you weren’t a pegasus and tried to nap in the clouds, but now, it’s like you’ve lived in Equestria all your life.”
“Aw, well, I don’t know about that,” I said, mostly because I wasn’t sure if that was her explanation for how I fell from the sky, or if she was joking, “but thanks, Pinkie.”
I turned to look at her, and saw that she was smiling warmly. She nestled herself up closer beside me, and I drew an arm around her. The singing and partying was still going on, but our eyes were on the fireworks outside, our brains abuzz with the fond, vivid memories of my first days in Equestria. Here I was on the threshold of a new year, ready to make it even better than the last!
The Fun Dance is based on the Ballroom game from Lil Howie's Great Word Adventure, which I loved as a kid. 
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Great chapter! And 100 is coming up, what are you gonna do for it?
Berry, go home, you're drunk.
Nah, but seriously, great chapter man! Keep it up!
> Fedora
> My Lady
Dear God
THE CUTE! IT BURNS!
Dammit Pinkie and Moonlight. Why must you be so damn adorable? 
This is delightful. Moonlight and Dave are bonding more and more... It's a good thing. I wouldn't mind seeing a picture of Moonlight just to be sure how she looks. Keep up the awesome Blazewing. This be great.
~Adjier
PS Typing broken sentences will be the death of me eventually. I mean look at it.
4418535
What? What's that reaction all about? 
4418669 i1.ytimg.com/vi/oe9uK9QGCUI/hqdefault.jpg
It's a meme about how everyone who wears fedoras are basically in the friendzone, and they're the guys that say "my lady".
4418738 Oh. Well, did you realize that "my lady" was a polite form of address to women among the upper-class men of England since... I'd guess at least the Middle Ages? I don't think it's supposed to be taken literally...
Thanks for your explanation! Wanting Dave to get himself a special somepony, then?
4418753 Yes, I know that. I'm a sucker when it comes to history
However, the combination of fedora and "m'lady" in this one clicked instantly in my head 
And yes, I would like for him and Moonlight to get together
*tips fedora*
4418762
I dunno, something seems suspicious about Moonlight to me
Woohoo! Got my Moonlight fix! Another wonderful chapter.
I love this story, I really do, but there's something off for me. Where's the story part? So far, we've merely gotten continuity nods, and while stuff has certainly been happening so far, I don't see any sort of conclusive ending at any point in the future. I'm not saying it needs to end abruptly per-se, but I think it's due time Dave remembered what sent him to Equestria, or at least had that addressed in some way. The way the first page just disappeared made me think it was going to come up again, is all, and I think it would be interesting for Dave to realize he was actually in the world of a cartoon, and have Ponyville cope with that.
That said, this is one of my favorite stories on the site, and every update brings a little bit of cheer to me alongside it. While this one was no different, I figured now was as good a time as any to voice my opinion on my one true gripe about this story.
Still, nice job.
4418738 such a shame then that the hats in the meme are actually trilby hats, not fedoras. Fedoras have a wider brim without as much of a curl at the back.
source:
Me. I like hats.
Also Wikipedia and online hat shops, among others.
Another excellent and adorable chapter.^^ You continue to impress, eh?
I don't care what people say about fedoras these days, they're freaking awesome!
Yes, it most certainly does.
That said, my favorite song of all time is Auld Lang Syne. You are awesome for mentioning it, and for actually knowing what it means.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=acxnmaVTlZA
I looked up this verson on Youtube and lissioned to it thoughout the rest of the chapter! And it was beautiful! It just made the chapter that much better to read! And the ending of the chapter was very touching!
DARNIT! When will Pinkie just admit to him she likes him?!
lol
and I was sure that with a with a new year, would come new assignments from Ironmane. I could certainly use the extra free time to deal with them.
4420567 Whoops! Thanks for pointing that out for me.
4420639 Not a problem... I do it for everyone when I find something I know is wrong or messed up I post it up for them to see...
Just trying to be helpful! 
I love this story. It seems to me more like a serial, rather than a book or something. It has a nice relaxed pace with realistic, well thought out arcs. I find many HIE stories too farfetched (and yes, I do realize the irony of that statement) in having the main character off slaying dragons or killing manticores and timberwolves with their bare hands when the truth is that most people would probably just end up settling down and finding a job like Dave does.
4419567 I already know that. However, I was considering the meme that thinks, albeit wrong, that trilbies are fedoras.
4421317 fair enough then. just trying to spread a little knowledge, but good to hear you know already.
Another year over, and a new one just begun.
Zecora and Screwball? Thats what I call mental agility.
Next, Dave has to go check up on the Dragons Bar and Grill?
I'm still waiting until he regains his brony memory back. But I can wait even longer. (also, why do I have this nagging feeling in the back of my mind that Moonlight secretly likes Dave?)
4421122
Or when the human knows where they landed, they run away from Ponyville as far and fast as they can, denying that they're human but something else instead (like a Bearotaur)... but it never helps because those crazy ponies will come find you anyway and make your life interesting. (Diary Of A Store Clerk is awesome)
Personally, I don't mind that this story keeps rolling along. I don't miss the epic drama commonly found in other HiE stories. Oh sure, something contrived could be cooked up once Dave fully immerses himself in his diplomatic career. Problem is, humans just aren't special in Equestria. Especially when there's just one. If anything, the more empathic races might feel pity on him; the last of his kind who will become a footnote in history's books (or did Celestia spill the beans about him being an unwilling traveller that's merely stuck in Equestria?)
So I am guessing since this is on December 28th they are using a lunar based calendar.
Is it just me or is the quality just increasing now :O
Also, dat Jabberwock
*grabs vorpal sword and sighs* and here I was hoping for a nice, quiet frabjust day
Ship them already!
4422443 I have that nagging feeling too.
4420032 Same
4439328
But of SEY!
meta.filesmelt.com/downloader.php?file=Spy_Blazyd.png
4439964 i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2011/03/17/article-1367376-0D77B7B7000005DC-450_468x601.jpg
better than spy
4441839
NYET!
SPY IS KING OF TEAM!!!
fc02.deviantart.net/fs70/f/2012/202/e/c/tf2_spy_by_biggreenpepper-d581d7q.jpg
4441856 and so this replying was caused because a story had a fedora in it
files.sharenator.com/11_Doctor_Fez-s290x321-279678.jpg
"A fez is cooler" -Doctor
4441856 technically,also the "king" of time
4442639
I think not!
vanillatf2.org/wp-content/uploads/2010/07/Hats-Spy.jpg
"The man makes the hat and I am that man."
-Spy
4442643
Perhaps but not the King of the Battlefield
cache.gawkerassets.com/assets/images/kotaku/2009/05/spy_update.jpg
4444164 The Doctor starts new Trends
),
.
.
eviledna.files.wordpress.com/2011/04/doctor-who-the-impossible-astronaut-matt-smith.jpg
files.sharenator.com/11_Doctor_Fez-s290x321-279678.jpg
media-cache-ec0.pinimg.com/236x/6f/45/83/6f45837cbf59787b749ab66f6d03eba3.jpg
4444179 A battlefield is only a certiant point in time and space,The Doctor is, technically,the king of the universe.Plus on that note he has WAY cooler 'wepons' than a basic spy.
a.tgcdn.net/images/products/additional/large/d7d8_doctor_who_new_sonic_screwdriver_inhand.jpg
A sonic screwdriver that can open anything(exept wood
posterplanet.net/doctorwho/images/doctor-who-tardis-bigger-on-the-inside-poster-p3623.jpg
A spaceship that can travel anywhere in the universe, as well as time itself.Plus its bigger on the inside
Make your move
4445704
as well as his stupidity (don't ask
).
for the future of humanity as a whole.
I would make my move but I recall being in a heated discussion with a Doc. Who fan not so long ago that raged out at me in more ways than I can remember when the beginning of our conversations was otherwise peaceful and calm.
Needless to say, his stubbornness was
In order to avoid a repeat of this, I decided to avoid any and all Doc. Who related discussions and dick-measuring contests or risk having a repeat of said event that left me quite tired and
As such, I'll end this before it begins with this:
i1.ytimg.com/vi/8Nws_sFMoNY/hqdefault.jpg
4445762 Ok,to end this nonsense of debating, lets just say that Fedoras are cool whoever wears them,may they be a spy,TV show character,or a person in a story.there all cool.
And with that,i leave u with a gift.
img2.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20131223063039/glee/images/1/1e/Fedora.jpg
4446830
Oh you~
img3.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20120715160813/mlp/images/3/3e/Twilight_hugging_Spike_S2E02.png
This is the most fabulous gift anyone has ever given me
4457668 ?ti t'nsaw nuf .elihw a retfa ysae s'ti. Hgouht ti gnietirw ysae ton s'ti
note: i was getting confused writing that so dont judge if its complicated.
4580376 Technically, they're still being worked on. I just put in some alternate material to replace the cutie mark stories and keep the flow consistent. I have the original stuff saved elsewhere, and am just waiting for my editor's OK. And I have gone back to make some changes to those chapters too.
4580391 Oh, okay.
I've read through all 96 chapters and now I am sad that there aren't more. A very nice, enjoyable, relaxing read.
4615967 I'm glad you've enjoyed it so far. There's more to come, but it's hard to tell when. My editor has a busy work schedule, y'see.