• Published 30th Jun 2012
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An Engineered Friendship - Engiminer



A human arrives in Ponyville at the beginning of the first episode, escaping from zombies on Earth.

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Chapter 7

If you are reading this, I'm sure you've seen the pilot episode, so I won't bore you with the consistencies. All you really need to know is that I played no part in the three obstacles that came next. I am not skipping these parts because they had nothing to do with me. I am skipping them because I don't want to waste our time describing something that you can just as easily find on YouTube or Netflix. I will, however, fast forward to the scene right after crossing the bridge over the ravine.


"I told you guys," Rainbow Dash said with a satisfied smile, "that I NEVER leave my friends hangin'!" I'd drink to that, if I had some water.

I pointed to the crumbling castle ruins in front of us. "Sir Point-Out-the-Obvious-alot spys the... The, uh... What was it called again?"

"The Ancient Castle of the Royal Pony Sisters." Twilight breathed.

Dashie flapped up into the air, then sped towards the door. She tried the knob. "No dice!" she called back. "It's locked!" The others groaned.

"Celestia FORBID it should be easy!" complained Rarity, rather fed up with the mission and irritable because of her missing tail.

Dash backed away from the door, then charged. She bounced off like a basketball off a stiff trampoline. She hit the ground hard, holding one foreleg with the other and screaming with pain. Shy and I ran to her, the others on our heels. Fluttershy gently asked Rainbow Dash to let her get a better look at the injury. She studied the leg intently for a moment, then picked up the injured foreleg. Dashie yelped with pain, and I winced in sympathy. The impact had dislocated her shoulder.

Fluttershy whispered comfortingly in her ear: "This is going to hurt a moment, but it will feel much better." Without giving Rainbow Dash a second to react, she rammed the leg back into its shoulder socket, relocating the joint with a *pop*. Dash screamed with pain, but only for a fraction of a second. The scream rapidly faded into a sigh of relief.

I took out Weapon X, turning it into the TF2 Medigun. "Dash, I know that you are going to be just fine, but this will prevent any bruising and remove any splinters you may have gotten from that door." I pulled the lever on the Medigun, and blue and red streams of light glowed from the nozzle. The red lights phased into her, while the blue skittered over her skin, sealing a couple cuts and removing them without a trace. She hopped up with a smile on her face.

"Whew! I feel good!" She exclaimed, jogging in place. "Haven't had this kind of energy since I was a filly, racing everypony in flight school!"

"Yeah, the Medigun will do that. But don't get cocky," I warned. "that buff is only temporary, and it only strengthens you a bit. It does NOT make you invincible!"

Twilight had been inspecting the door while we were talking to the good-as-new Rainbow Dash. Her horn shined, a mask of concentration plastered onto her face. The shine faded, and Twilight turned back, panting. "Nothing." She said simply. "It must be magically sealed, and I can't penetrate the seal."

"Hmm..." A smile trekked across my face. "I think I can do something." I turned the Medigun into a cannon. I asked Rarity to light the fuse, then yelled to everybody to cover their ears. BOOM I smiled at the door, and my jaw dropped. Not a freaking scratch! "Alright. New tactic." The cannon transformed into a mortar tube. "Cover your ears again, and keep. Them. Closed!" Thoonk Seven to ten seconds later, the explosive round landed with and earth-shattering boom. The pegasi carried the earth ponies up to the hole in the roof, and I carried the unicorns.

The ponies gasped as we dropped through. We were too late. Nightmare Moon was already inside, working out her super-villain laugh. She gestured to the fragments of stone around her. "You are too late! I have already destroyed your precious Elements of Harmony! The night. Will last. FOREVER!" More villain laughter. Man, she gets on my nerves.

Twilight was devastated. "No!" she cried. "That was our only hope!"

Applejack put one hoof on Twilight's shoulder. "Not our last hope," she said with conviction.

Dash zoomed up to the other side. "Yeah! We can... convince her to reconsider!" Huh. Her feisty side was more feisty than I thought.

"HUT!" Weapon X was now the Breaker Blade, 10 ridiculously long feet of serrated tempered titanium. I pointed the giant sword at Nightmare. "You stand no chance!" Twilight stared back at her six new friends, all backing her up. The panic slowly gave way to a confident smile. She turned to face the evil astronaut head-on.

"You may have destroyed the STONES, Nightmare, but the Spirits of the Elements of Harmony are right HERE! Applejack, when she reassured me when I was in doubt, represents the Element of... HONESTY!"

Applejack, as well as some of the stone frags in front of Nightmare Moon, levitated high up into the air. Nightmare's eyes widened in horror. "What!?" she cried. "NO!!" The stone frags began to orbit Applejack.

"Fluttershy, who subdued the manticore with compassion rather than violence, represents the Element of... KINDNESS!" Yeah, FlutterSHY! Fluttershy tried in vain to hide from the stone fragments that began to orbit her. Twilight continued:

"Pinkie Pie, who laghed in the face of danger to dispel our fear, represents the Element of... LAUGHTER!

"Rarity, who cut her own tail to benefit the river dragon, represents the Element of... GENEROSITY!" Last one, I thought proudly.

"Rainbow Dash, who couldn't leave her friends for her own heart's desires, represents the Element of... LOYALTY!" Now for Twilight Sparkle herself...

"And finally Engiminer," Wait, WHAT? "who rescued me from a fatal fall, and Rarity from the manticore's claw, and got us into the Castle in the first place; represents the Element of... STRENGTH!"

"Woah, woah, woah, hold on." I protested as I floated up into the air. My Breaker Blade fell out of my hand and fell to the floor with a mighty clang. "I thought there were only six Elements? And how the heck do I have an Element? I'm human!" I couldn't believe the Fragments of Harmony swirling around me.

"And when the, uh, spark, is ignited, it unlocks the Element within us all: the Element of... MAGIC!"

The Fragments of Harmony formed necklaces on each of us. The new Stone of Harmony, Magic, formed a crown on Twilight's head. I looked down at the emblem on my necklace. A shiny purple shield with crossed silver swords reflected my human face. I noticed a pimple on my cheek. Stupid acne! Wow, we humans think of the dumbest things, don't we?

Suddenly, a green light shot out of my necklace, blinding and startling me. My eyes darted around. Sure enough, various colors were pouring out of everyone else's necklaces, too. Twilight's eyes shone a bright, clear, white. Without warning, the colors from our emblems swirled around us, shot up into the air, and came down in a rainbow arc onto Nightmare Moon.

"NNNOOOOOOOOOO!!!"

Finally, the colors disappeared. We all landed on our hooves. I opened my eyes and smiled. Princess Luna lay where Nightmare Moon had stood seconds earlier, all the evil and jealousy sucked out by the Elements of Harmony.

"Good work, my little ponies!"

Startled, I looked to my left. Gliding through a busted window was Princess Celestia.

"Princess!" Twilight called, overjoyed to find her teacher unharmed.

"Aw, man!" I cried. "There was a window? Al I needed was a damn sledgehammer! Oops. Need to work on my swearing some more, methinks." I glanced around and found I was the only one not bowing. I hastily closed my eyes and bent down. Celestia made a regal laugh that was somewhere between a giggle and a chuckle. I heard her footfalls (hooffalls?) grow louder as she approached me. I picked my head up and lifted my left eyelid as she spoke.

"I see we have a new addition to Equestria." Celestia bent her head down towards me. "And what might your name be, little one?"

I get out of my bow. "Engiminer." I replied. "I guess this is the first time you have ever seen a human?"

"No, actually. Sometimes humans do make their way here. Usually they are worried about home, but they normally decide to stay. Besides, you are no longer a human."

"Wha'?" I looked down. Hooves. Huh. I really need to pay more attention to myself, don't I? I heard groaning to my right as Luna came to. She slowly got off the floor. She opened her eyes blearily, blinked a few times, and inspected her surroundings. She caught sight of Celestia and gasped. Luna sprinted towards her big sister.

"Oh, Sister! Sister, I am so sorry. I don't know what came over me! Can you ever forgive me?"

"I already have." Celestia replied, nuzzling her little sister's neck. "I missed you so much. Please come back to Canterlot with me."

Luna smiled gratefully, and Pinkie Pie burst into tears. The full-fledged sobbing lasted for two seconds, then dried up immediately. "HEY!" She yelled. "Y'know what this calls for?!"