• Published 30th Jun 2012
  • 1,413 Views, 32 Comments

An Engineered Friendship - Engiminer



A human arrives in Ponyville at the beginning of the first episode, escaping from zombies on Earth.

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Chapter 6

To pass the time as we walked, the Mane Six ponies interviewed me about life on Earth - both before and after the beginning of the Zombie Armageddon.

"I was apprenticed to an inventor named Roy Scott. He was like a second father to me. He was also the last human I saw fall to those cannibalistic freaks. He activated the teleporter on his final breath." I sighed as a single tear fell down my cheek. "He was the man that gave me these." I held out the DS and my pistol. "He was experimenting with something called 'artificial magic'. His reasoning was: 'If an illusionist can pretend to do it, a scientist should be able to perfect it.' He gave me these because I was the only one who believed in him."

Applejack, Rainbow Dash, and Pinkie Pie could barely contain their curiosity. "Well, c'mon! What do they do?!"

"A handheld game system was a perfect housing for this little device." I held up the DS, grinning. The grin faded fast as a look of horror scrawled itself across my face. "Um, R-R-Rainbow?" I stammered, pointing behind her. "W-What's that?!"

They whirled around and found... nothing but trees. They turned back, annoyed. Rainbow Dash asked, "Alright, what's the big ide-" She froze when she saw me - or rather, herself. "What the hay?"

I grinned again and chuckled. "That's funny," I spoke with her voice, "When did this mirror get here?" I opened my DS again and changed into the Team Fortress 2 Spy. (Note: I have a few other video game references in this story. Some are subtle, others aren't.) "Gentlemares." I said in a prim, dignified voice. Then I changed back into myself.

"That. Was. AWESOME!" Rainbow exclaimed.

We heard a roar coming from a gap in the rocks ahead. Fluttershy squeaked, Twilight gulped, and Rarity gasped. I tensed up. "Now to demonstrate Weapon X."

Fluttershy flashed me a disapproving look. "Weapon X?" she asked. I could tell by the tone in her voice and her posture that she hated weapons.

"Don't worry," I reassured her. "I never cause harm if I can help it. For example, thus:" I held up the pistol, now glowing brightly. Its silhouette morphed into that of a shield crest. The light dimmed, and I held I dark purple shield with a bright blue inlay. Engraved into the inlay were pickaxe and spanner wrench from my "Cutie Mark." "Say hello to the Obsidian Cobalt Shield."

"Hello!" called Pinkie, totally forgetting about the roar from the rocks. The source of that roar, a manticore, pounced out and roared again.

Rarity, who was closest, kicked the manticore in the face. "Take that, ruffian!" She taunted. The manticore roared once more, this time at Rarity, messing up her mane. "My hair!" she shouted with dismay. She didn't notice the claw that was rising to cleave her down the middle.

Why isn't she taking notice? I thought, sprinting towards them. She won't have time to dodge! The claw fell. Rarity finally realized the danger she was in and squealed. She rose her forelegs in a feeble attempt to ward off the attack. It never came. *CLANG* Rarity opened her eyes, surprised. I had hopped over Rarity and into the path of the humongous claw. My shield was the only thing between me and a rather ribbon-y fate.

"G-G-GET G-G-GOIN'!" I yelled. She backed away as quickly as her legs could take her. The manticore started slamming on the shield with both paws. My boots started to slide. "Damnit girls! Could use some help here!"

Rainbow dashed above the manticore, and stomped down with both hind hooves, stunning him. I backed off and yelled for Dash to do the same. No dice; she didn't listen. I cringed when the monster slapped her with his scorpion tail. The ponies lined up to charge-

"WAAIIT!" Fluttershy cried out. The others stopped confused. Fluttershy trotted right up to the manticore, who was about to slash when she nuzzled his other paw. The manticore hesitated, then, sensing no threat from the pink-haired pegasus, turned the paw over, revealing a thorn stuck inside.

"Oh, you poor little baby..." she cooed sympathetically.

"Little?" exclaimed Dash with disbelief. The others shushed her.

"Now, this may sting for just a second." Ploink! The manticore roared, scooped her up, and... started licking her. Fluttermedic giggled at the gratitude. The others smiled and waltzed right past. I started to follow them, amazed at Fluttershy's bravery, when the manticore started growling at me! I recoiled, a bit scared and unsure of what to do. Fluttershy placed one hoof against the monster's mouth.

"Shhh..." she whispered gently. She motioned to me with her other hoof. "Keep going!" she whisper-yelled to me. I tip-toed past the creature. The manticore tensed up when I got close, but reassurances from Fluttershy kept him calm. The second I passed the manticore, I bolted to safety. Fluttershy convinced the manticore to put her down, then she trotted over to join us.

"How did you know about the thorn, Fluttershy?" Twilight inquired.

"I didn't!" she replied. "Sometimes, everyone just needs to be shown a little kindness." D'AAWW!!! "Nice shield, by the way. I was expecting something more dangerous."

"If I had been alone, then trust me, I would have done some damage." I said thoughtfully. "But with you all here, I didn't need to, because we had a better option."

"Thank you. I hate violence." Fluttershy sighed. "Too bad there are times when it is the only option."

"Not all the time," I said. "Quite a few hostilities can be diffused with something even easier than a fight." It was my turn to sigh. "Unfortunately, my fellow man didn't seem to think so. Now violence is the only way to deal with zombies. Did I tell you that the entire plague was started when some hostile idiot released the virus onto the planet? It wasn't a natural virus, oh no. It was a military project, made as a weapon that was more devastating than a nuke." I felt my heart grow colder. I spat: "Well it sure hell worked wonders, didn't it?!"

Fluttershy gave me a sympathetic hug that thawed my cold logical heart a bit. "How in heck did you get so adorable?!?" Yeesh, me and my fanboy squeals.

Fluttershy blushed, making her even cuter. I just wanted to scoop her up and squeeze her. I coughed, blushing, and tried to pull myself together.

Pinkie broke the silence while the others stifled laughter. "Well, if everypony is done complimenting each other, those Elements of Harmony aren't going to find themselves!"