• Member Since 8th Dec, 2014
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CrossRedstone


It's better to see death from her funny side. On my funeral there's gonna be a clown. I would hire Pinkie Pie, but sadly she only exists inside our poor minds.


T

This story is a sequel to Subconscious Being


After surprisingly coming to life, Midnight Sparkle is more than ready to tackle on the adventure called life. Her "sister" doesn't really share her excitement. Velvet and Nightlight are pretty much lost. Shining Armor is as unhelpful as always. Cadance feels guilty. And the Rainbooms are ready to pull off another rainbow-laser-beam exorcise.

[Tags added as needed]

Chapters (5)
Comments ( 117 )

Can't wait to see where this goes.

Inappropriate use of commas, words misspelled or confused with similar-sounding ones (auto-correct can be more a hindrance than a boon), awkward use of ellipsis... Mate, you need an editor.

Still, I'll stick around. Looks interesting enough.

7616947 I didn't have my program for the second part of the story. At least the commas won't be an issue in a few hours.

yes!! a sequel!! now lets see how this goes!

This has so much potential. Great start, I'm glad you're continuing this.

Only thing, Twilight and Shining's father is called Night Light, not Nightland; other than that, nice work!

7617240 Whoops.
7616947 Okay, now it should be at least a little bit better to read. Though you're right, I need an editor. Machines can only do so much after all.

This can go wrong so quickly.

7617281 It's like Spike learning that he can talk and Pinkie's acid vision.

put comedy tag because i can sense this is going to be a comedy as well

Can't wait to read the next chapter. This is so exciting.:pinkiegasp::pinkiehappy:

7617340 Not sure if the following chapters will be funny, really. I certainly didn't laugh writing this. But I guess for now.

Midnight Sparkle can be such a perv.

7617414 I have yet to add the sex tag you know? :applejackunsure:
So far I have no reason to add it.

This alone goes against the law of conservation of mass and the law of conservation of energy.

It's magic duh.

7617494 Ah, but she did use magic to subconsciously create her.

7617498 Still, how do you think Twilight's mind works? Magic is still an entirely new concept to her. While this is obvious to the reader, she is thrown in a rather peculiar situation.

7617503 As long as she doesn't attempt to create the humanized version of the Want it Need it spell she could refer to Sunset for magical lessons.

7617507 Did you really need to give me this idea? Just give me an excuse for using it and I can make you a chapter.

7617511 I wasn't intending to give you an idea but whatever works.

Comment posted by CrossRedstone deleted Oct 4th, 2016

7617422 I'm only stating my opinion mkay.

7617602 That'd be nice, actually. Mind sending me a PM for further discussion? I'm kinda cooking right now^^

Definitely adding this to tracking. Looking forward to this story continuing.

They may want to figure out how to hide those wings before the government shows up.
I'm hooked, can't wait for more! :twilightsmile:

Great intro and loved the ending, nice work. :twilightsmile:

A nice start, I'm glad that this story got a sequel, and I can't wait to see what'll happen next. Twilight and Midnight'll definitely have some problems with the situation they're in.

And come on, Cadance, ever heard of knocking?! :rainbowlaugh:

the only way to make a clone has been proven inefficient, as the cloned sheep died, due to half of its genetic code missing.

pushes up thick rimmed nerd glasses

Well, actually Dolly's 4 "sister clones" are all perfectly healthy. Heres a piece on it from just earlier this year

I will definitely be tracking this one :twilightsmile:

7618723 I was only aware of the first attempt from 19something or so.

Why do I get a feeling that Midnight might go somewhat sexual or at least senual predator towards Flash Sentry... I acknowledge that I am Flashlight shipper but I highly doubt you plan on including him at all... As in he's nowhere in the story not even in the blood background for a nanosecond... but I am getting that vibe... Oh did I just give you an idea... I really need to make an appointment with Dr. Wolf...:twilightoops::twilightoops::twilightoops:

7619195 Shippings are still open. I'm generally not a Flashlight hater, but I personally ship him with the pony princess. Whether he will make an appearance as more than a background character, I'm not sure. Shippings with Midnight? No idea. That's mostly the reason for the lack of a romance tag.

7619289 The proposed Midnight x Flash idea was not implying that Flash was consecting to Midnight... there was a reason I said predator... :pinkiecrazy::pinkiecrazy::pinkiecrazy:
Oh sweet Celestia I do need to make an appointment with Dr. Wolf:rainbowderp::twilightoops::fluttershysad:

BWHAHAHAHA! Oh man that ending though!! <3

I am TOTALLY shipping Twilight x Midnight Sparkle >=)

7619083 Dolly's demise at 6-1/2 years was not contributed to her clone status but a common lung disease in sheep and she was euthanised after she was observed suffering and diagnosed. Thus endeth today's trivia lesson of irrelevant to story fact.:twilightsmile: Thanks Twilight!:trixieshiftleft:

Shining armor knew about this, of course.

Capital on Armor

Looking down they found Spike quite adorable fletching his teeth at Midnight Sparkle, his growls not stopping.

adorably flashing (fletching is the feather attachments on an arrow)

“Confusing is one way of putting ?.”

? = it

Midnight spoke before Twilight could vocal her thoughts.

voice or vocalise

The dog walked over to his basket and made it himself comfortable inside, before going back to sleep.

Delete 'it' (that's where that it went from above)

You think those girls will abandon you after all, that happened?!”

That comma needs to go.
Good first chapter, but disappointed no-one fainted at 2 Twi's. :rainbowlaugh: JK. A few little quirks to fix and it's perfect.:twilightsmile:

Interesting start, but you need to proof read or get a good editor for this-there are a lot of punctuation errors, misspelled words, and more. Not bad enough to make me drop the fic, but certainly drags down the quality and breaks immersion from time to time.

“Namely that magic somehow gave my subconsciousness a complete consciousness of its own. Of course, it’s just speculation at this point, as none of us had had the time to give it much thought…”

has
Nothing like a good faint scene of all the 2nd rank cast members for a chuckle.:rainbowlaugh:

Can I say it? I am saying it, 'Midnight Sparkle is a bitch'. I said it. There done, hit the thumbs down all you want

7651000 That was my intention. She is not exactly an "angel", so to speak.

She. Sounds. Like. Adagio.

7651000 To be perfectly fair, she is/was the embodiment of everything negative about Twilight Sparkle. Being a bitch is a few steps up (or down depending on perspective) from trying and having significant success in merging reality and possibly destroying the world.

7651341 a duck is still a duck, if you cut off it's wings or not.... Bad methaphor but my point still stands Midnight is a bitch

I wonder what Midnight thinks of Sunset, the Rainbooms and Mr. Wooden chin (aka Timber).

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