• Published 7th Feb 2017
  • 2,374 Views, 35 Comments

"The Twilight of His Life" - TheTalentlessPony



That's what he always called her, and by no means did she want to give it up, but...

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To Be Together

It was quiet in the big castle; naturally, of course. It was so very late at night, the only sounds coming from Flash and Twilight's heartbeats as they hugged. For once in a long while, Twilight felt completely at peace. No concern about breaking up with Flash or feeling the constant want to return to the human world to see him. No, he was right here instead.

He exhaled softly. "Sorry it took me so long."

"It's all right. Sorry it took me so long too." She giggled. "Your hugs are pretty above average for just becoming a pony though."

"Really?" Flash asked, pulling away with a silly grin.

Twilight grinned back. "Nnnno, but I can tell you're trying, and that's more than good enough."

"Hey, you try having human hands all your life and then getting a pair of hooves instead." He sat down to the best of his ability, holding up his front hooves for emphasis.

"Fair enough. At least you get a pair of wings in addition to them."

"Wings?" Flash was immediately intrigued, glancing at his back with curiosity. "I can fly? For real?"

"For real!" Twilight echoed, spreading her own and giving them a rough flap. "The pony Flash - or I guess he's just the other Flash now - is a pegasus as well, so it makes sense that you have that trait too when crossing over to this world."

He nodded sheepishly. "So, uh, how would I get them to work?"

She smiled, turning and starting to walk out of the room. "I can teach you a little bit tomorrow if you'd like?"

"That'd be great! I mean, I should get used to this whole pony thing if I'm going to keep up with you." He followed her to the best of his ability, eyes occasionally drawn to her hooves so he could imitate them.

"I wouldn't worry. I still don't think I'm that amazing at flying," she admitted, though being embarrassed to do so. "My friend Starlight taught me how to use my magic as assistance, so I almost never fly with wings alone."

"Yeah..." Flash drew his gaze up to her horn. "Do I have one of those too?"

She glanced over at him to see what he meant. "Oh, a horn? No, only unicorns have horns. Alicorns, like myself, do too, but we're an amalgamation of all three types of ponies combined, so I don't particularly count it, especially since being an alicorn in and of itself is mostly exclusive to being a princess."

She waited for a response, but he was silent. "...What?"

He smiled. "You're incredible, you know that? Having such a big role in Equestria..."

Twilight blushed, averting her gaze. "I-it was my destiny! That's what Princess Celestia told me."

Flash gave a cheery laugh. "And then you go and say that you're not worth me staying here? Come on, Twilight!" He bumped into her slightly as they trotted along. "Not that I would've cared if you were a princess or not. I'm the one who doesn't deserve you if anything!"

"That is so not true!" Twilight argued. Seeing his playful expression, however, she smiled and teased him back. "Though, if you disagree with my choice—"

"No no, I don't!" Flash interrupted. "No arguments here!"

The two had a few giggles over the conversation as Twilight opened her bedroom door and led Flash inside. He seemed curious about it, like he had with the few things he'd seen so far, but it came to a shy halt as they both approached the bed. Sure, they'd both cuddled and such before, but sleeping together was the one thing they hadn't done.

Flash watched as Twilight slowly climbed onto the bed. "...Is this okay?"

She nodded. "Is it okay with you? I know you're used to how I look as a human, so I imagine it's a bit weird for you now."

He waved a hoof dismissively, smiling. "You might look different, but I still see the same the same old Twilight, human or not."

He attempted to pull himself onto the bed with his forelegs, only to miscalculate and flop face-first into the bed, earning a giggle from Twilight. He squirmed a bit at first, then went over to her side, being careful not to crush his wings as he tried to get comfortable. Twilight watched him, recalling fond memories of the past; particularly, the day before she first met him, where she encountered the same problem. It was funny to think that her life wouldn't be nearly as enriched now if Sunset hadn't stolen her crown.

"So..." Flash's voice brought Twilight out of her thoughts. "What's a pegasus like me to do about getting a guitar?"

She chuckled, amused that such a thing would be on his mind. "I'm sure we can find something to do for you." She laid down next to him as they cuddled, albeit semi-awkwardly. "I would definitely miss hearing you play otherwise."

He was flustered from the close contact, Twilight radiating an almost-magical warmth at such a range. It was nice; more than nice even.

"I could still sing to you?" he offered, though eyes slightly droopy. "Starting tomorrow though, when I'm not so tired."

She cuddled closer, nodding her head in approval. "I'd like that."

Flash smiled, nuzzling Twilight lovingly as they slowly fell asleep in each other's embrace.

Comments ( 34 )

Bravo! Lovely story with a fluffy happy ending!

7930723
Thank you so much! It was really hard for me to post this one because I felt so self-conscious about it, so the fact that my first comment was a positive one makes me very happy! :pinkiesad2:

7930730 Well put those silly fears away. I think I liked the fact that not only did it sum up how crappy a LDR is (growing apart, time and energy just to be together, busy busy) but you wrapped it up in 4 chapters that didn't just drag on and on with endless bull the most. Again, very well done.

7930742
Ahhh, thank you! It's definitely a very different fic, though cutting out pointless things that just drag the story on has been important to me since the beginning.

I actually posted this a few hours ago with the knowledge that I was going to have to leave the house for a while, and was certain that I'd come home to some sort of feedback. While the other two stories I'd posted did stunningly well, this one... yeah.

It's not a BAD like-to-dislike ratio, but it was so close that I think I might've hyperventilated for a bit; I was so scared that everyone would hate it because it's Flashlight, and I was just waiting for the first comment to be negative.

I'm really glad that wasn't the case. Now I'm just hoping it gets added to some sort of Flashlight group soon and people like it more so that dislike ratio goes down. It's really nerve-wracking if I'm honest, and a lack of comments means that I don't know if the dislikes are from people who legitimately hated the story or just didn't like Flashlight, didn't read, and disliked anyway.

I haven't read the story yet but I feel like a lot of the dislikes are from the Flash x Twilight pairing. I think its immature people are down-voting this story purely because of a pairing; its immature. This story looks promising and I can't wait to read it. :twilightsmile:

7931136 I agree... there's nothing really wrong with this fic, just discriminating people marking it down because the ship in question is among the most unpopular in MLP history. I bet most detractors aren't even reading it. :ajbemused:

Author... never start writing what you want to, and I'm sure posterity will look back on this fic with kindness. In the meantime, here's an upvote from me to redress the balance somewhat... :raritywink:

7931136
Aww, thank you very much. :twilightsmile:

A-and yeah, I was hoping that, by posting three stories at once, less people would come here to hate since I did have two other perfectly readable fics as other options, but I guess that didn't happen. This story has actually been on the backburner for a VERY long time for that reason too. I was just... so scared.

What's with all the dislikes? This is a good story. It can't be because of Flashlight. Right?

7931478
Firstly, thank you. I'm glad you like it. :twilightsmile:

Secondly, I'm really not sure, if I'm honest? Assuming that my writing is the same as all my other fanfictions, the like-to-dislike ratio is VASTLY different from even my worst (though I guess it'd be second-worst now) fanfiction, and that was written YEARS ago. It was maybe, 76% liked? Then there's this one which is even worse off.

So, truthfully, I have no idea. I know that the community as a whole tends to not like Flashlight, but I don't know if that's where the hate it coming from; my first comment was after 8 dislikes, after all, and it was a positive one.

Considering how many Anti-Flashlight groups there are (I can remember three currently), I just don't know.

It makes me really self-conscious, to tell the truth, because I can't figure out if these dislikes are for the story or for Flashlight.

Flashlight isn't my cup of tea, but given how bold you need to be to post a story about it and that you're looking for feedback, I'll give it a go anyway.

...Yeah, the dislikes definitely are because of the ship, not the story. Technically, it's near perfect- a few strange semicolons and a line in Cht.2 about how Twi and Flash fell for eachother that reads very strangely, but still better than 95% of the stuff here. The premise- issues revolving around a long-distance relationship across the mirror- is hardly unique, but satisfyingly resolved. The levels of emotion are pretty appropriate for the situation- Twilight's anguish is real, without being melodramatic. You never cross any lines, and there's plenty of potential for ensuing slice-of-lifey goodness if you ever wanted to continue this storyline without a serious goal in mind.

Unfortunately, there's absolutely nothing you can do to cut down on the story's dislikes, short of changing who it's about (the same basic plot would work for Sunset, who's way more popular), badly misrepresenting it in the description (you won't get knee-jerk reactions, but many more legitimate unhappy readers) or limiting its exposure (posting on an alt, using no cover art, etc). Adding it to FlashLight groups could get you a few more fans, but be aware that haters follow those groups as well, so it'll rake in more downvotes as well. None of those are very good options, so the best you can do is shrug, move on, and care about the people who did like it instead.

As for improving the story itself without changing what it is or adding large amounts of "it would be cool to see" type scenes... I haven't much to say. It fulfills its purpose well, and the style works. Saying nothing here is saying quite a bit, though, because bad stories I can pick apart for days- basically, keep on doing what you're doing. Including being bold. Props for posting a story that's doomed to be negatively received, and taking the time to make it good anyway.

7931713
First off, I really appreciate you reading even if Flashlight isn't your thing; that means a lot! :twilightsmile:

Aww, you really think it's just the ship? People have been talking about it for a bit, but it's nice to hear it again just for the sake of it. And yeah, this is very slightly old, which might explain some weird semicolon uses. That's my bad; I'll fix whenever I go back and read this.

Thanks for the advice! I'm sort of just letting things happen for now as it does since I don't really follow groups. The dislikes hurt even though I expected them, but the positive comments did wonders to lift my spirit.

And double thanks for the props! It really did take all of my guts to post this, so I'm glad it's praised for that if nothing else. :twilightsheepish:

I'm surprised that this story (the ending of the third chapter) brought tears to my eyes. I don't normally get all teary-eyed from reading, so congrats on that. Have a like. :twilightsmile:

7932077
Yay! Thanks~ :yay:

I'm glad I could invoke the needed emotions~

Whoever downvoted this has their computer upside-down, or were victim to an unnecessary lobotomy. :trollestia:

Great stuff, TTP, and I love it. :twilightsmile::heart:

I'm sorry that the herd hive mind hates the flash/twi pairing so much. This story deserves a much better rating than the 29/14 it received.

7934646
Aww, thank you. It means a lot to hear people actually say that. :pinkiesad2:

That was very nice.

Why are there so many downvotes?! I mean, this is really really good! I wish I could write romance like this...

7937275
Aww, thanks so much. The current theory that people in the comments seem to have is that the downvotes are because people hate Flashlight shipping.

7937660 That's stupid! This story is a great small romance. It actually has some, unlike those 1000 word one shots that say they're romance, this was believable and well-written! Stupid downvoters!!!

7937678 No problem. Don't let the downvotes get to you, this was great! Which I forgot to favorite...hang on here.:facehoof:

7937660 Yeah that would be it, my guess is people judging before they read it. Personally I really like the idea of Twilight going to Flash when she just needs a break from everything.

Comment posted by Galaxy of Equestria deleted Feb 22nd, 2018

Absolutely beautiful and amazing, I am not exaggerating when I say I have tears of joy and a huge grin from that heartfelt and sweet ending.

9217194
Oh gosh, thank you so much! I'm so glad that most people are enjoying my story objectively instead of judging it based on the pairing.

It's okay, but it feels kinda rushed. I think it would've been stronger if you'd spent some time from Flash's point of view. You know, like talking to his parents about this, and everything. I have nothing against Flashlight, and if it's written properly, it can be really nice.

I really like this story, but it feels incomplete. It reads like the beginning of a much larger story. Also agree with Boltstrike58's assessment that we should have seen Flash's POV.

Tired of the Flashlight haters too. Consider me one of your fans (at least in regards to this story). In fact I even wrote a similar story years ago, so that alone should tell you how much on your side I am.:twilightsmile:

Think you'll do a sequel sometime? :pinkiehappy:

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