Evangelium (Celestia)
"Your Divine Radiance, Prince Solus has arrived."
"Show him in."
What shall I do with thee, Solus?
Minen son looketh awfully nervous as he entereth. Maybe he is not a lost cause if he already realizeth how his attitude is most unbecoming of a Prince of Equestria.
"You wanted to see me Mother?". he says.
"Yes. Some guards informed me that you were throwing quite the tantrum."
"Ah, well, you see-"
"No excuses, just tell me."
"He was hurting my...companion."
"Did you not tell him to train your new acquisition?"
"Well, yes, but he didn't do it the way I wanted."
"And what is the way you wanted?"
"I want a companion, not a weapon. The Throne already have more than enough of those."
"Hmm, I see."
It is only normal, I suppose. He hast no other friends. At least, none that shall not betray hine.
"Is that all?", I say.
"Um, yes?"
"Well then, learn to be more clear in your demands in the future. That shall be all."
"Really?"
"Yes. Unless there is something else?"
"No! With your leave, Mother."
"Goodnight, Solus."
He leaveth at a swift pace. Do I frighten him so? I thoughte I hadde ybeen lax in min discipline of hine. Maybe...
"Hey there little Sunshine. How do you do, there’s a great kingdom, waiting for you..."
Maybe I ought to showen hine more overt affection. It would not do for hine to thinken that I do not love hine. If only I didde not have to hide my plan to get rid of her...
No point crying over spilled milk. He already hath three companions, far more than I thoughte he wouldst have by now. And two of them aren slaves.
Hmm, Duchess Satin hath a daughter, doth she not? What was her name? Sunset Shimmer, I thinke? I am sure she shall make a most excellent companion. A few years older, but far more experienced in the Game. I heard she was quite adept at ruling over her class.
Food for thoughts, though perhaps I shoulde help hine assure the loyalty of Lord Armour.
"Herald, go fetch Duchess Velvet."
"At once, Empress."
"Your Divine Radiance, you asked for me?"
"Indeed We did. We heard your son was now taught by the Prince's tutors?"
"Yes, Empress."
"Then maybe we could use the opportunity to bring them closer together."
"Your Radiance?"
"What would you say if We proposed to make Lord Armour the sworn sword of the Prince?"
The Duchess' face goeth through quite a few emotions before settling on mild disbelief.
"I...we would be honoured, Empress."
"Good. I hope you won't mind if We relocate his residence to be in the Prince's quarters? A sworn sword that is not by his master's side his quite ineffective."
"Ah, no, of course I do not mind, Your Radiance."
"Perfect. Send your son to Our steward and I shall soon make it official."
"I understand, Empress. A thousand thanks for this great honour, Your Divine Radiance. I shall take my leave now, if you will excuse me?"
"Farewell, Duchess."
She boweth and leaveth promptly.
That take care of that, maybe it will even allow me to show minen son minen love for him.
Just a few more years, and I shall get rid of the traitor and I will finally rule in peace, alongside minen son who shall not betray me.
Thou chooseth the name Nightmare Moon, sister of min? Well, the rising Sun will banish the nightmare, once and for all, and Equestria will be free of your discord.
Order shall reign supreme and all will work together for the Greater Good, like it was always meant to ben.
"Empress?"
"Fair tidings to you, Proper Worth."
"Um, you too, Your Radiance. What brings you here?"
"I'd like to see my son."
"Of course, this way."
He showeth me the way to Solus' bedroom and I entere. I go to the side of the bed.
"Mother?"
I lay a kiss on his head and use my magic to adjust his covers.
"Goodnight my son, know that I love you very much. Have sweet dreams."
I turne and I leave, though not before getting a glimpse of his face, where utter surprise is etched. I have been a poor mother if minen own son is this surprised at such a simple show of affection. It would not do for him to turn out like...
Like Luna.
No, never, he shall never be like that ungrateful wretch. Never like that foal who complained about nothing all the time. It's not my fault our subjects saw her for what she was. She brought this upon herself.
Solus is better than that. He will not turn on me for such trivial reasons. He will soon see the value of Order.
I will make sure of it.
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Why does she speak Normally on the outside, but in her mind speaks Olde English?
I see what's going on here. "Corona" represents order in the extreme, Nightmare Moon represents Discord/chaos... or anarchy in another way. Makes you wonder what happened to the actual "Discord" here.
Harmony is the balance between the two, which has been lost.
8301783
Because she's really old and never quite got around to change her ways.
WTF I love Celestia now!
Wow, this chapter was quite an interesting surprise
Behold, for we have been graced with a glimpse of the mysteries behind the Empress' mask. Celestia must have swung far into the Order side of the scale. I'm still not sure if turned before or after Luna's fall. But still. It's really creepy seeing her actually care though
I see where this is going...
In this world, the two sisters are a bit more extreme on both sides of the spectrum. Similar events, but instead of breaking down and loathing, celestial went full control instead. Not a complete tyrant, just unable to fully grasp the balance that harmony brings.
At least she's not completely gone, I feel as if this celestial could still see reason... if Solus doesn't do what I think he's gonna do and make the biggest mistake ever.
Eager for the next chapter.
Interesting getting a glimpse into her mind.
How she actually does love Solus, but is utterly clueless about it. Her plans is defeat Luna for good.
And Sunset?! I hope she isn't a bitch. But am A Element! Generosity? Maybe?
. Is that canon? Or a Star Wars reference?
8301815
Fanon. Twilight Velvet/Sunset Satin
I hate Celestia even more now in this fic
Perspective.
Aaaaw damn. I was really getting into the daily updates. But whatever works for you, you amazing word-creature.
Dunno how to feel about this, at first you make Celestia a tyrant, now you make her somewhat good, make up your mind.
It's gonna be interesting to see how the nobility is dealt with depending on how he deals with his mother and aunt. If they turn into kind ponies the nobility will turn on them faster then a swarm of piranhas skeletonizing a cow.
8301853
Well, the Mane 6 aren't born yet so he's preparing with what he has. Plus nothing guarantee that they are even alive to begin with. What do you think would happen to Fluttershy in that kind of world?
Thanks for the fan art, I love it!
You know, reading this story, it seems to be taking the path of a Greek Tragedy. Celestia, a mare who due to her inability to communicate the feelings she has for those she cares about, drives away her child into launching a civil war, shattering the order that she spent her life building, and turning all that she is responsible for to ash. Solus also in a way, to suffer the same fate. He, due to his blind belief in the perfect equestra from the show, and seeing any divergence from such a state as a corruption, shall drive away all whom care for him, drive the nation into the flames of war, and extinguishing the fires of friendship by dissolving the bonds binding the three tribes of Equestra together.
I see what you're going for here. This version of Celestia has many masks, and likely hasn't let them down in a long long time. She clearly loves Solus, even if she has a hard time showing it. She fears him falling to whatever made this worlds Luna fall, and is trying hard to make him see her ways. She however fails to to realize that by acting the way she does, she pushes him away like she did(maybe?) to Luna.
With Solus already having decided that "Corona" is pure evil, its only a matter of time before things come to a head. Will Solus gather the bearers before "Corona" realizes what he's doing? If she doesn't, will the elements petrify, or purify? If they purify, what will Celestia do once she realizes what she's done? And how will Luna tie into everything?
So many questions, so many paths this story could take. I wish you the best, and I thank you for the fast updates.
Thumb up!
8301932
More importantly what about her and Zephyr's parents, fan names Mr. Cloud Caller and Mrs. Shyla. Both are very much meeker then their filly. and case in point, I thought Applejack was at least an infant the chapter in the slave pens, so if that's true Fluttershy should have been born, since it seems that she is the oldest of the mane six.
... huh. Well, that happened. I'm really not getting a good sense of how this Celestia developed. From the last part of this chapter, I can assume that, upon banishing Luna, she countered her remorse with anger and mental attempts to validate her actions and absolve her guilt. But that doesn't explain how we went from there to slavery. Everything else up to that point seems canon, since I can't imagine the elements banishing an innocent Luna.
As for the last chapter, I'm glad you backtracked on the Mac situation. I still think Solus has all the subtlety of a brick to the face, but at least he's not a dislikable character. Fics never seem to work out well if you can't even stand the protagonist.
holy hell the evil queen isnt as evil as we thought
Stick to chapter lengths in excess of 2500 words or more, even if we don't see a chapter for a day it will work out better in the long term.
8301843
OOOOOOOOHHHH!
I C!
Oh splendid. This will turn out great. I am sure of this possibility in the future.
So she isn't pure evil, she simply have a rather.....complex view of life mixed with really bad experiences.
Celestia man I love you darling.
8302039
I'm guessing when Celestia began cracking the whip after Luna's banishment the Earth ponies stood by there own ways. Perhaps they weren't producing enough food or labor to support the growing empire and as a result had to be more strictly motivated using unicorn magic.
This eventually evolved from Supervision to Domination.
Unicorn Bastards.
Although having Sunset be the betrothed bride to him that he utterly hates and is forced to converse with despite her cruelty and snobbishness might be a good arch.
With Potential to change her.
Yeah, a lot of people seem to be thinking that just because Celestia isn't a parody of a mustache twirling villain that she might still be good. The thing is, there really aren't that many "villains" who see themselves as evil. Most who choose to do evil do so for reasons perfectly justified in their view. Just because she loves her son doesn't absolve her of her other crimes. And frankly... even if she says she loves him, is there anyone who doubts she wouldn't execute/banish him just like she did Luna if she finds out he's planning a coupe? On the other hoof she might be a little proud of him for trying to overthrow her at the age of 6.
Sorry, wasn't trying to rant...
But yeah, there goes the theory that his Auntie would help him once she returns. If she's calling herself Nightmare Moon then she'd probably think it funny to play guillotine with his head. Though he could still use her return as a smokescreen for blasting BOTH of them with the Elements. He might find it humorous to be bigger than his mother for a change.
I don't like that her inner monolog is written. It's very confusing and kinda just looks like a jumble of letters and words with extra "e's". But that could just be me. Also take your time, as you said take a couple of days to make the chapter better, I feel like if this chapter had a bit more detail it could be a lot better than it is. It moves too quickly from one seen to the next.
8302346
I tried to write in Middle English and let me tell you something: It's fudgin weird.
Literally no one ever has thought like this.
8302397
I believe it. Completely weird to try to read to LOL!
8301932
It looks like traditional artwork which requires greater planning than digital, unless I'm mistaken, I assume chalk or colored pencil was the medium if not crayon...
Back to the subject of Solus I was wondering if she was going to figure out if he had memories of an alternate timeline at some point?
It would be interesting if Solus could raise the hairs on the back of her neck. Just by doing something unintentionally innocent from all outside appearances but really creepy to Celestia alone.
Something (let's say like) orchestrating a play or talent show as a gift for some holiday using songs or a storyline from Hocus Pocus and having something innocent like Come Little Children set her off. Maybe later in a attempt to approach, sneak up, or reconcile with Solus she catches him singing 'the banana song' that drove Luna batty, or lullaby for a princess, bonus points for creep factor if he sings Come Little Children. I guess it might also be fun if Solus and shining performed a 'two best sisters play parody' as well.
I also feel that Solus interaction with Sunset would go something like this...
What are these ragged shreds of flesh I clutch? Oh, it's what's left of my heart after you kept stabbing me in mine feels.
it's it's WONDERFUL!!!!!!!!!!! I cant wait to see what happens next!!!
gotta love some butcher'd ye olde english 😞
now this was an interesting bit of insight. we see the other side of the coin at last.
She's setting Solus up to use the Elements of Harmony! This will be interesting to see how they both work to achieve the same thing without the other knowing.
Can't wait for more!
NOOO!!!! Thou hast destroyed the Archaic language!!!! How could thou?!?! May thy Nights be filled with nightmares of bad grammar!!!! Have at thee!!!!!!! (p.s. We are not very surprised at the grammar as most people do not know the archaic language. So thou made a very good chapter!!!!
)
We art not surprised, Archaic Language is hard- But Uh... could you fix this chapter- We Think We Got cancer from trying to read it.
I'm starting to think, this AU is actually taking more to humanity than with the canon towards how the world is being operated. A strong european-esque system of ruler<noble<knight<serf but in the form of alicorn(ruler)<unicorn(noble)<pegasi(slave soldiers)<earth pony(multi-purpose slave).
If we see it in terms of human sensibilities, Luna would've been a mere case of regicide than some bout of emotional instability. But if that's the case.
His mom's actually normal, and he's setting up the world to fall...
8302918
Yeah... it was a bit butchered, but the point is made through the chapter nonetheless.
I know I shouldn't really say anything though, as my attempt at making 'ye olde' would be worse lol.
8301905
It's called character building. From one person's perspective she is an evil tyrant, whereas from another perspective, she is just a person who may have broke on the inside and doesn't want a mistake to happen again.
Aka... Solus' perspective, and Celestia's perspective, respectively.
We just haven't seen any other perspective other than Solus' obviously biased one.
8303260
That i get, what i don't get is what the author wants us to think, do we hate Celestia, like her or pity?
And then there's Luna given all we know was she truly the evil one? Guess we have to wait and see.
I would not be surprised that everything goes to shit because the MC cannot accept an AU for what it is, and destroys it, seeing as he vehemently enforces that the "canon" of the world must be that of the show.
This world cannot become like the canon-verse, simple as that. The noble system, the society, the culture and mindsets have been horribly altered 1000 years earlier. It doesn't just become all sunshine and rainbows after shooting the skittle beam of doom on Luna and Celestia, there is an entire tribe whose very livelihood was based on the enslavement of two others and treated them worse than dirt for over millenia. Ponies are going to die, be it the unicorns fighting to maintain the status quo or the other two seeking revenge and freedom. That's not even counting the attention from abroad, seeing how other races were enslaved, whatever nations that exist outside would see this as an opportunity to carve up whatever land they can conquer, while killing or enslaving ponies in kind.
Oh, I really want to see what happens
Good chapter, nice to have another perspective. Could have done without the ye olde english though.
I don't want to sound mean but maybe you should drop the old English speech. It's difficult to read and I am doubtful of its accuracy. Also Luna could get away with the old speech due to being stuck on the moon for a thousand years, but Celestia doesn't really have that excuse. I don't care how tyrannical her reign is language would've evolved somewhat since then.
8303461
She speaks in modern, but she's thinking here, and that's entirely her perogative, in universe. As for reading... It's unusual certainly but I think it's an interesting choice. It does take longer to parse, admittedly.
I can't wait for Souls friends to finally gather! I can imagine it now,the companions!
Never a grater force for Honor and Justice. In there ranks hero's of legend were forged the six gathering to make the greatest force the empire has ever known!
HAIL TO THE COMPANIONS!