Chapter Two - A Pony who is Welcomed.
Chapter Two - Welcome to Ponyville!
It has been a rather strange day for Twilight Sparkle, esteemed student of Princess Celestia and the Bearer of the Element of Magic. What had started out as a normal picnic lunch with her friends had turned into a day that was unlike any other. Twilight and her friends had dealt with ancient darkness long since sealed, a god of untold Chaos and a horde of creatures that fed on love itself. But they had never seen anything like the stallion that stood before them now.
“My name is Twilight Sparkle!” The lavender introduced herself first. “Do you have a name?”
The stallion blinked for a moment and Twilight wondered if the translation spell had truly worked, until he replied, “My name is Flare Blitz.”
“Flare Blitz?” The name had a nice ring to it and seemed to suit the stallion. “So um, if I may ask… What are you?” Twilight asked curiously.
“I’m a Ponyta,” He replied, like it should have been common knowledge. “And my question is what kind of Pokémon are you?”
“Pokémon?” Twilight had never heard of that before, and this Flare Blitz thought she was one? “What’s a Pokémon?”
“You’re kidding, right?” Flare was astounded. How could this purple thing not know what a Pokémon was? Everyone knew what a Pokémon was! “Oookay, then where am I? Kanto, Johto… Kalos?”
“I haven’t heard of any of those places,” Twilight said. “This is the town of Ponyville, in the land of Equestria.”
“Equestria?” Flare sat down rather suddenly and blinked. “Just where the heck am I?”
First he had been running from an enraged Palkia and Dialga and now he was Arceus knows where and no clue on how to get back! Flare was much taller than purple mare standing in front of him and now he was sitting, he could look her directly in the eye. “Her eyes are kinda pretty,” The idle thought just passed through his mind before he shook his head. “What the hell am I thinking? I have bigger Magikarp to fry.”
“H-how did I get here?” He said, his voice a little shaky as panic began to set in.
“I don’t know, there was a tear in the sky, and then a bolt of lightning hit the ground and you were there, I truly have no idea what caused it.”
“It was one heck of an entrance though!” Rainbow Dash chimed in before Applejack nudged her in the ribs. “Ow, what?”
“Show some tact!” The farmer warned her pegasus friend. “The poor colt has no idea where he is and he seems a bit confused?”
Flare turned his head when Applejack spoke, her voice sounded familiar somehow. “So Equestria huh? And there really aren’t any other Pokémon here at all?”
“Um, I’m sorry,” A soft and gentle voice replied. Flare turned to its source and saw a yellow pegasus with a pink mane. “But even I have never heard of ‘Pokémon’ before...”
“Fluttershy is an expert on all sorts of animals and if she’s never heard of them...” This got Twilight back into thinking mode as she walked off to a bookshelf, mumbling to herself.
“The ‘Twilight Zone’, we’ve lost her for a while now~” Pinkie giggled and bounced up to Flare. “Is it my turn for a question?”
Flare gave the pink pony an inquisitive look and nodded his head. “Sure, why not?”
“Okie Doki Loki,” Pinkie giggled again as she bounced up and down on the spot. Was she made of rubber or something? “When’s your birthday?”
“...” Flare just stared blankly at her. He had expected a lot of questions, but this one threw him for a loop. “Wha-? But why?” Flare took a breath and looked back at her. Pinkie’s smile was as endless as her bouncing. “The third day of summer is when I hatched,” he said and Pinkie nodded, scribbling something down in a notepad. “Okay, and what’s your favourite type of food?”
Flare blinked again. What was the point of these questions? “Uh, Passho berries I suppose...”
‘Okay, okay last one!” Pinkie said, she was now wearing a journalist hat. “What is your favourite type of mare?”
“Alrighty, I think that’s enough!” Rainbow said, pulling her pink friend away. “I think he’s had enough Pinkie for one afternoon.”
“There is no such thing as too much Pinkie!” Pinkie declared as she bounced around happily, humming a little tune.
Rainbow sighed and turned back to Flare. “Sorry ‘bout that. Pinkie is, well... Pinkie.”
“It’s alright,” he said. “No harm, no foul.”
Rarity smiled at him as her eyes gazed upon the flickering flames that danced along his body. “If I may ask darling, those flames, they don’t hurt at all?”
Flare gave his tail a flick, which caused the mares present to flinch slightly as embers fell from it and onto the wooden floor, but didn’t do anything.
“I can control the temperature of my mane and tail, and as for hurting me, well no.” He beckoned Rarity over and motioned for her to touch his mane. “Trust me.” He said with a warm smile as Rarity gulped and reached for his mane with a shaking hoof. As she got closer, Flare sighed and leaned into her hoof as the unicorn shrieked as she thought she was about to burn until she realised that there was no heat at all.
“Incredible.” She breathed quietly as she ran her hoof through his mane. Flare concentrated a bit and Rarity felt his mane get a little warmer until it was about the same temperature as a warm bath. “See?” he said, “It’s alright.”
Rarity’s eyes suddenly went wide as a flood of ideas washed over her mind. “I-I have to go! Please excuse me!” She bolted towards the door, but turned just as she reached it. “It was a pleasure to meet you Mr. Blitz.” Rarity gave a polite bow and then left hurriedly out of the door.
“What the heck was that all about?” Flare wondered. “I didn’t make my flame too hot did I?”
Applejack shook her head and placed a hoof on his shoulder. “Naw, ah’ve seen that look before, She’s just got an idea or two and went home to work on ‘em.”
Flare tilted his head and Applejack explained further. “She’s a fashion designer by trade and I’ll bet ten bits that yer flames gave her a bout ‘o’ inspiration!”
“I see.” Flare never paid much attention to that sort of thing. Velvet had tried to get him to wear a fancy outfit or two, but Flare found they didn’t last long in the heat of battle, much to the despair of the Espeon.
“So what about you two?” he said to RD and AJ. “Any questions for the Pokémon?”
Applejack shook her head and gave him a friendly smile. “Y’all seem like a nice enough stallion to me, so ah think we’re good.” She thought for a moment and then decided to ask. “Y’all have any experience in buckin’ trees?”
“Trees?” What did she mean by that? “Um, I’m not sure what you mean, so no, I guess I don’t.”
“Already looking for cheap labour huh?” Rainbow teased the farm pony. “Well I have a question actually.” She walked up to him and looked him in the eye. “I wanna know how you saved the Cake twins earlier today.”
“Finally, an easy question! I just used my Quick Attack to catch the carriage.”
“Quick Attack? What the hay?” Rainbow was confused as to what he meant. He wasn’t a unicorn, so it couldn’t have been magic. “How do you do it?”
“It’s just one of my attacks,” Flare explained. “Kind of like a special ability or power would be another way of putting it.”
“A special power!?” The four remaining ponies turned to see Twilight coming back over to them. “Can you tell me more about them? What do they do? Is it like magic? Were they powers you were born with?”
“Whoa there Sugarcube!” Applejack said, trying to reign in her excited friend. “Yer beginnin’ to sound like Pinkie.”
“But he’s a completely new life form!” Twilight levitated over a quill and some paper and was ready to write. “Can you explain these powers? In as much detail as possible would be perfect.”
There was a shriek as all ponies in the room turned to the libraries front door to see Roseluck standing there, her eyes wide and pointing a shaking hoof at Flare.
“M-m-m-monster!” She screamed and bolted from the library and into town.
Fluttershy finally spoke up after the dramatic exit of the earth pony. “Um, perhaps we should tell the townsponies that Flare isn’t dangerous first?”
“That might be a good idea,” Twilight sighed and put her quill down. Her research would have to wait.
***
It was like the whole Zecora incident all over again. Doors and windows were boarded up and ponies watched with fearful eyes as Twilight and her friends walked Flare through town.
“Did I do something wrong?” Flare asked. “Why are all these poke- I mean, ponies, hiding from me?”
“It’s not you,” Twilight replied with a twitch in her eye. “I seriously thought we’d learned from this with Zecora already.”
Pinkie nodded and bounced on ahead. “Alright everypony!” she suddenly called out at the top of her voice. “Unless you all come out and make friends with Flarey, then I won’t invite you to any parties!”
This was an interesting tactic to say the least. “Seriously? You really think that something like that will-”
Flare stopped talking as ponies came out of their homes by the droves, their faces filled with regret for shunning a newcomer and fear of never seeing another Pinkie party again.
“You have got to be kidding me,” Flare muttered as ponies of all shapes and colours began to introduce themselves to him. “You must throw some amazing parties Miss Pinkie.” Flare said, looking at the pink pony.
“Yepper deppers~” Pinkie sang. “I throw the bestest parties in Equestria, you just wait until tonight.”
Flare spent the next hour just greeting anypony and everypony. After Pinkie’s little threat, and actually getting to know him, everypony in town seemed to be okay with him. It seems that love and tolerance were the flavours of the day around here.
As Twilight and her remaining friends continued to show him around, they eventually came to the park and the still smoldering crater that Flare had caused with his arrival.
“Whoa!” Flare breathed in disbelief. “I caused that when I showed up?”
“Yeah, and totally wiped out the fountain along with it!” Rainbow laughed. “It was a pretty spectacular entrance.”
Flare’s eyes widened, no wonder everyone had been shocked to see him. Seeing the destruction he wrought upon his arrival and the description of the event that caused it, the title of ‘Demon Pony’ seemed rather fitting now.
“I’m so sorry about this,” Flare apologised, bowing his head to his new friends. “I promise I’ll make this up to everyone somehow.”
“Wha? Oh, no.” Twilight replied, shocked at the sudden apology. “It doesn’t sound like it was your fault... speaking of, do you remember how you got here?”
That was actually a good question. Flare closed his eyes for a moment and thought about the circumstances of his arrival in this strange place. “I remember running from Dialga and Palkia, and then...” He pressed a hoof to his head as he recalled nothing but a blank. “I-I don’t know, I simply remember running and then waking up in front of all of you.”
“Okay then,” Twilight had remembered the first time she attempted teleportation and that along with some bad magical burns, it also brought temporary memory loss. “Maybe you were teleported here somehow? Or perhaps...?” She walked off to the side and mumbled to herself again as she came up with dozens of theories.
“She does that a lot huh?” Flare noted as Rainbow nodded.
“Yeah, but Twi’s good at the eggheady stuff, so I think you’re in good hooves.” Rainbow Dash gave a single flap of her wings to propel herself into the air. “I got some weather stuff to take care of, but I’ll see you all at the party tonight?”
Fluttershy and Applejack nodded as RD raced off, a rainbow contrail in her wake.
“Wow, she’s pretty fast huh?” Flare was quite surprised at the abilities that these ponies had. Some were similar to pokemon powers, but others were simply amazing.
“Rainbow is one of a kind,” Applejack said. “But she’s dependable an’ more loyal than anypony else in the world.”
“She kinda reminds me of my friend Sapphira.” Flare closed his eyes again as he thought about the three friends that were probably looking all over Alamos Town for him. “She’s brash, quick to start a fight and doesn’t really trust anyone until she gets to know them... but I wouldn’t have anyone else by my side if I were ever in trouble.”
“Do you have a lot of friends?” Fluttershy asked him.
Flare shook his head. “No, I was never really good at making friends, but I love the ones I do have.”
“Well you can count us among them.” Twilight smiled, putting a hoof on his shoulder. “At least, I hope you will.”
Flare nodded and returned the smile. “I would like that,” He replied quietly. “Thank you.”
Twilight looked at the clock tower and then back to her friends. “Should we head to Sugarcube Corner? I don’t think Pinkie would want us to be tardy.”
Fluttershy and Applejack exchanged nervous glances at the mention of the word ‘tardy’ and nodded. “Yeah, I reckon we should go right now.”
***
“Well this is a great party.” Flare deadpanned as the Pokémon and three ponies stared at the closed bakery. “But seriously, it’s been what, thirty minutes? I don’t see how a party could be arranged that fast.”
“Trust me, Pinkie can do it.” Twilight said. “Well, I guess we could head back to the library for now. Maybe Pinkie is taking her time with this one?”
“An’ pigs’ll do a Sonic Rainboom,” Applejack retorted. “Pinks is up to sumthin, Ah can feel it.”
The group arrived back at the library and the moment they walked inside, the fiery Pokémon was assaulted with an explosion of confetti and noisemakers.
“Welcome to your Welcome to Equestria Super Surprise PARTY!!” Pinkie cheered as she appeared out of nowhere. The normally quiet library was filled to the brim with just about everypony in town. Twilight looked around for Flare, who seemed to have just disappeared.
“Where did he go?” She wondered aloud. Pinkie pointed up and Twilight saw the Pokémon dangling from the rafters, shaking like a leaf.
“Oh my,” Fluttershy gasped. “Are you alright?”
Flare dropped back down to the floor with a loud ‘thud’ and cleared his throat. “Uh, yeah… totally fine. I meant to do that.”
He looked around the room to see dozens of ponies all chatting, playing party games or munching on snacks.
“How the? When did she?” Flare was utterly baffled. “I saw half of these ponies like, ten minutes ago. How did she pull this off?”
The generally accepted response is that Pinkie Pie is just being Pinkie Pie.” Twilight explained with a sigh. “Trust me on this one. You do not want to try and figure it out. It will just lead to a headache you will not soon forget.” She cringed as she remembered that day.
“Oookay,” Flare backed away from the muttering unicorn and decided to see what was on the snack table when he was stopped by a new group of ponies.
“Um, hello.” A white pegasus mare with a pink and green mane greeted him. “I didn’t get to meet you earlier in town.”
“Oh? Uh, well hello then.” Flare greeted back. “My name is Flare Blitz, you?”
“Blossomforth,” The mare responded. She pointed to her acquaintance, a bluish-grey pegasus with a blonde mane and tail. “This is my friend Cloud Kicker, but I should warn you-“
“Don’t worry about that.” Cloud Kicker cut her off. She looked Flare up and down and smiled. “Well you’re certainly handsome enough for a non-pony I suppose.” She walked a bit closer until she was almost pressed up against him. “How about you and I ditch the party and have some fun somewhere else~”
Just what the heck was that mare talking about? The party was okay, and Flare really didn’t feel like being anywhere else right now, especially in a place that he knew nothing of with a pony he only just met. “Uh, no thanks.” He replied. “I think I’ll stay with Twilight and the others for now.”
“Twilight?” Cloud Kicker responded, “Are you and her-?” She was promptly cut off as Blossomforth grabbed Cloud Kickers’ tail and dragged her away. “Let’s see what Lyra’s doing huh?” she offered
“Oh? That’s an easy one. Me. Later tonight.” Cloud Kicker grinned, causing Blossom to blush and groan.
As the odd duo wandered off, two more ponies walked up. One was a brown earth pony stallion and sported a dapper-looking tie. His partner was a grey pegasus mare with eyes that didn’t seem to focus quite right.
“Good evening.” The earth pony greeted Flare, shaking his hoof. “You seemed to have caused quite a stir today. You can call me Time Turner.”
“And I’m Ditzy Doo!” The pegasus mare said happily. “Nice to meet you!”
Flare nodded and smiled. “Yes, it’s nice to meet you two as well. I really do apologise about earlier. It wasn’t my intention to make trouble like that.”
“Ah, don’t worry about that dear boy,” Turner waved a hoof. “No harm no foul and all that. And you saved a pair of foals to boot, so I’d say all is forgiven as far as anypony is concerned.”
“Yeah,” Ditzy agreed. “I bet you’ll be friends with everypony in no time.”
“Friendship really means something around here huh?” Flare asked. “Not that I’m complaining mind you, it just seems that everyone is just super friendly.”
“Ponyville is just that kind of place.” Turner said. “It’s a bit much to take in at first, but give it time and you’ll come to wonder how you lived without it.”
Flare nodded and bid them farewell as he continued to mingle and meet many ponies. Musicians, farmers, florists… so many ponies and all of them wanting to be his friend.”
“So how goes the meet and greet?” Twilight asked him as he was getting a drink. “Have you met everypony yet?”
“I’m fairly certain I’m friends with the entire town now.” Flare laughed. “But yeah, it’s actually kinda nice here.”
“That’s good,” Twilight smiled. This creature may have a strange (and slightly dangerous looking) appearance, but he seemed friendly enough. “But just where did he come from?” That question still lingered on the forefront of the unicorns mind.
Before long the party came to an end and only Flare, Twilight and her friends remained.
“So what will you do now Mr. Flare?” Rarity asked him. “Do you need someplace to stay?”
Flare shrugged and looked in the direction of the park. “Guess I’ll just sleep outside, it seems like it will be a nice night.”
“Outside? Like a wild animal?” Rarity was shocked. “That simply will not do, you must be able to rest in comfort.”
Flare was about to ask on what was so bad about sleeping outside when Twilight put a hoof up. “I have a spare bed in the library,” She mentioned. “You’re more than welcome to stay there until we find a way to get you home.”
“You really don’t have to do that,” Flare said. “I’m used to sleeping outside and-“
“Nonsense darling, we shall not take no for an answer.” Rarity stamped her hoof in determination. Luckily, Flare had long since learned that you never argue with a female, you can never win.
“Alright then, if you all insist.” Flare sighed and followed the mares back to the library once more.
***
Once there, Twilight wasted no time in disappearing into a side room to set it up for her new guest. As the other five mares sat in the main room in silence, it was Flare who broke the quiet stillness when he saw Pinkie staring at him.
“Yes Miss Pinkie?” He asked, and received a response that he was not expecting.
“Can I hug you?” She asked with a sweetly innocent tone.
Flare cocked his head to one side in confusion. “You-you want to hug me?”
Pinkie nodded and shuffled closer. “It’s just that Rarity was saying that your mane was nice and warm and I thought that if I hugged you, I bet it’d be like hugging a big hot-water bottle~”
“I-I see.” Flare was once again at a loss as to try and figure out that ponies train of thought. “I guess it’s alright.”
“Yippee!” Pinkie cheered and threw her forehooves around his neck. “Woow, you really are nice and warm~” She turned her head to face the others and she had a wide, dopey grin on her face. “Girls! You seriously have to get in on this.”
“Well I set most of the clutter to on side, but we can clean it up properly tomorrow.” Twilight emerged from the little used storage room only to see her five friends embracing Flare Blitz, who wore an expression of both confusion and amusement.
“Apparently I’m nice to hug?” He said and Twilight facehooved.
“Seriously girls?” She said. “What are you all doing?”
“Well we’re hugging Flarey, duh!” Pinkie responded, nuzzling Flare affectionately. “C’mon Twi, you try it too!”
“I think I’ll pass.” Twilight replied dryly. “But Flare has been through a lot so I think we should let him get some rest okay?”
There was a collective ‘aww’ from the group, but they released their new friend and bid him goodnight.
“Can we come and play tomorrow?” Pinkie asked hopefully and Twilight nodded, causing the mare to bounce away while giggling happily.
“Sorry about that,” She apologised as she closed the door. “My friends don’t mean any harm though.”
Flare nodded and smiled. “I figured as much.” He replied and a sly smile crossed his face. “Are you sure you don’t want a hug too?” He stood up and walked a little closer to the unicorn.
“I think I’ll be alright,” Twilight responded, pushing him away. She did notice on how warm he was to the touch though. “I need to write a letter to the Princess, did you need anything else?”
Flare thought for a moment and shook his head. “I had plenty to eat at the party, so I’m good.” He nudged the door to the guest room/storeroom open and looked back to Twilight. “Thank you for everything Miss Twilight.”
“Just call me Twilight okay?” She smiled and Flare nodded before disappearing inside the room.
Twilight walked upstairs and seeing that Spike was asleep, she decided to write the letter and send it tomorrow. Sitting at her desk, she took some paper and a quill with her magic and began to write.
------
Dear Princess Celestia.
This will be my first time writing to you since the wedding, I apologise that it’s taken so long. Are you and Princess Luna doing well? I hope that the repairs to Canterlot are going smoothly.
The main reason that I am writing to you is not because of a lesson in friendship, though friendship is something that I witnessed in abundance today.
I am sure that you saw the anomaly in the skies above Ponyville today. Please do not worry, nopony was hurt in any way and other than a fountain, even the town itself is intact this time.
But something rather strange did happen. Just before the anomaly vanished, a strange creature emerged from it. After the treatment of some minor wounds and the performance of a translation spell (to great success I might add), my friends and I discovered that the creature goes by the name Flare Blitz, and is what he calls, a Pokeymon!
He stands a head taller that a large draft pony, (possibly a little shorter than you) and even stranger is that his mane and tail are made of fire! It doesn’t appear to burn though and he said that he can control the temperature of the flames, all the while insisting that it isn’t magic.
He has no knowledge of Equestria and thought that we ponies were simply species of Pokeymon. I have a few guesses on what may have transpired, but nothing solid until I do some more research.
I would appreciate any insight that you have to offer
With love, your faithful student. Twilight Sparkle.
-----
Twilight rolled up the letter and bound it with the royal seal and crest. Setting it onto her nightstand to send first thing in the morning, she climbed into bed and with a flick of her horn extinguished all the lights.
“I wonder if the Princess will have some answers?” She wondered to herself before drifting off to sleep.
***
Flare paced the room for a bit before going over to the circular window and peered out at the night sky. “Just where am I, and how in the name of Arceus do I get home?” He said quietly. He glanced towards the bed and after a moment, he climbed onto it, trying to find a comfortable position to sleep.
“Never really slept in a bed before, well, except for Pokémon Center ones.” He closed his eyes and eventually drifted off to sleep, his mind filled with thoughts of his friends back home, and the new ones he made here in Ponyville…
Stats
Page generated in 0.112 seconds
Total duration
625 users online
1,043,829 hits today, 2,814,898 yesterday
FIMFiction
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Follow & Support Us
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
By the Gods! Can it be? A new Chapter?
Yes, I finally got it done. I'm super sorry it took so long and I hope everyone enjoys it.
Major props to mah editor and apologies for putting up with all my 'never getting shit done'
Zzz... *snort* wha- oh look another chapter! At like 4 in the morning! Ima read then die. Metaphorically. Hopefully... Or just sleep *yawn*...
4 days away from this chapter being released a year after the first wow, also how does this story have a sequel when its not even done yet?
Sooo... Is there an old version of this? and where?
2804655 this is the first story, he is just rewriting it
2804655 It's being rewritten. So, it IS finished, hence the sequel.
2804655 - Ah, that's due to a derp on my part.
This is actually a re-write and the reason the date for chapter one didn't change is that I simply edited the original first chapter rather than upload a completely new one. I discovered that doing it that way caused it not to appear as a newly updated fic. I will eventually post the original version on gdocs, but have as yet to find the time,
2804671 - Yeah, see above. I would refrain from reading it until this is finished... again.
Ah gots Feature Box again!? Awesome~
Wow, Flare is quiet the mares' stud (ladies' man, for those who dont understand the analogy) even if he doesnt realise that.
I must say this rewrite hit me by suprise but I can see the reason for it. The original was good, but this one is better.
2805032 - Whoot! That's what I'm aiming for. Thanks for the comment man!
The ultimate blackmail...... No Pinkie parties for you....
Yay, update :)
You did a remake of the story but flare as his Ponyta self.. interesting i hope to see what happens..
2804655 This is a remake of a different version....
awesome
And so the rewrite appears. I'm liking it, but then I did like the original version too. *shrugs* I guess it's worth reading again
One thing I'd like to see is Flare going into detail explaining what Pokémon are to the Mane 6. It'd be interesting to see their reactions to Zebstrika (is that how you spell it?). It may just shatter their perception of reality if we're lucky.
Aha, a Winningverse shoutout. I'll be honest, I squeed somewhat.
Wait, so is this supposed to be a rewrite?
Just trade Twilight for Rarity.
encrypted-tbn1.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTNREkRyfQpO-8z6H5a4K9CkVO-g0YKPahFKm88V4KFzenXnZLsrw
And Mac for Flare Blitz.
mlkshk.com/r/8GRE
2804572 Yes it can, now make with the next one or I'm gonna Hyper Beam your ass.
im not really into spelling or anything, but your " a lot" are written as "alot" just lettin u know..
2807936 - Hmm, thanks, I get on that.
2807002 - First I lol'd, then I agreed wholeheartedly.
2805765 - YUSH! I love the Winningverse fics with a passion, so I'll be using the personas of Kicky, Blossom, Derpy & Family from that. I will have some shoutouts to other ???verse fics in later chapters and yes, I have permission before anypony asks too!
2806327 -I believe that has been explained multiple times by this point.
2805602 -Not so much of a reality shatter, seeing as how other universes are now canon. (Equestria Girls). But a Pokemon explanation is coming up next. The next chapter is already being written~
2805267 - Yah, that is probably the most significant change in this one. As well as the introduction of Flare's pokemon friends.
2805282 - Tusen takk!
2808534 Equestria Girls is non-canon with the show. And it WOULD be a reality shatterer, oh yes it would be.
2808534
As far as I'm aware, giving shoutouts like that is alright, so long as you don't go and rip off their stuff, you know? I don't think anyone would have a problem with you giving a nod in their direction with your stuff.
2808744 - I realise that, but people get butthurt in mysterious way so I'm just covering my flank. Plus the main reason I wanted Winningverse characters is that his version of Dinky is as cute as all hell~ She will be showing up in gratuitous amounts in the next chapter btw.
P.S. Chapter 3 is about 3 quaters done, so I should have it up by tomorrow sometime. Depends how long I hafta work
2809321 Great take you time.
so far, this rewrite FREAKING ROCKS! Keep it up!
good rewrite of the old chapter. cant wait for the rest.
Why does everyone see Cloud Kicker as a mare who will fuck anything with a pulse? I never understood that.
2814224 - Well I blame the Winningverse fics, but they are really well written and I enjoy them.
Going from a hard to soft sleeping surface can lead to serious cramping the next day. I learnedly that after coming home from college.
What is with every story I read minus that one fall out story have the freaking doctor and Derpy!!!!!!!!!!!!
2856011
By this point, the Doctor and Derpy is just this side of Canon. There's no use questioning it. Maybe season 4 will actually let us see Weeping Ponies or something!
Sorry couldn't resist!
well loved it the first time now i get to love it a second time lol
have you ever seen lucahjin
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lmoR9C36hU4
Nostalgia+my new Brony status= Incredible story expectations :D
Yes, after they've all been threatened. Really feeling the love.
[quote“Good evening.” The earth pony greeted Flare, shaking his hoof. “You seemed to have caused quite a stir today. You can call me Time Turner.”]Fore the last time. IT'S DOCTOR WHOOVES!!!
DOCTOR.WHOOVES!!!
3249573
Time Turner is his alias, like John Smith when he was human
"M-m-m-monster!" So wait, she sees several ponies standing somewhat calmly in front of a ponyta and she freaks out? Huh.
3423615
Hey they learned their lesson twice!
Applejack would never say that. You would however see her say "Simmer down Dash!"
But if you really want to go with "tact" then make it a mocking tone and then have her glance at Rarity, who will then give her a short glare.
Uh no this isn't a Pinkie question. Although I only quoted it just to answer it myself. My favorite kind of mare is one that's in character.
ba-da-tishhhhh 
I feel as if these two paragraphs are to be separate but you missed it when editing. Also why is Applejack already offering him a job? This is way too fast for the second chapter. Now maybe later on this'll be appropriate, but right now he's just too accepting and everyone else is too. Equestria is NOT an accepting land, especially not the main six. They should be more suspicious than this, and they should be a little more reserved.
But whatever, it's your story, not like I can do anything about it by now. You've already completed it and with an impressive chapter count. I assumed you rushed everything there too, but whatever. I'll continue reading.
You could have written 2000 words about this action alone. But you wasted it on a single paragraph to carry on with a plot that no one knows or wants to hear about. I want him to have a legitimate experience with the ponies before he goes plunging himself in evil things to save them. I mean this is just downright boring if you're going to skip over the interesting bits just to tell your version of the story.
But again. I can't influence you in any way because you're done with this story.
I am however leaving you these so that you can use this information to assist you in newer stories.
CARRYING ON AGAIN!
Aaaaaaaaaaaaand done...not sure I like how it's going but I'm going to continue to read in hopes I find something redeemable. This story isn't all that bad, but it's just got a few negative qualities that I've bitched about at some point. Anyway thank you for putting up with my comments and giving them a read.
I may not comment again, not like they'll do any good unless you really want to hear my feedback. If I find I like it then I'll favorite, but not like. I've fallen into that trap too many times really.
3431463 Oh, that is nothing. In the 1 Weird Al Yankovic show, Weird Al Yankovic learns the exact same lesson on at least 7 totally different occasions.
3423615 XD LOVE THE COMMENT!
first thing that comes to mind when twilight wright a letter to the princesses saying that a pokemon has come to ponyville ONE HAPPY GAMER LUNA
Speaking of Velvet, my friend Daniel would love his character. He does a funny 'fabulous' impression. I call it that due to this exchange we once had.
Daniel: Well, I won't be getting much sleep tonight. (Referring to the fact we're out in the open for an overnighter I dragged him on)
Me: Sleep is overrated, anyways!
Daniel: Tyler, you're gay.
(Others with us protest at that)
Daniel: Oh, sorry. I meant, Tyler, your Fabulous!
Sorry I couldn't help it.
Sigh, flare and twi are going to be in a relationship I'm guessing