Every time you read one of my stories, an orphan is allowed to be happy. Do it for the orphans.
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Twilight's new pet owl, Owlowiscious, is exactly what the doctor ordered for those late nights when Spike isn't there to help her. Now her biggest concern is making sure her Number One Assistant can get along with the newest member of their little family.
She totally didn't have to be concerned.
Many thanks to Syeekoh, Poo-san, and Kamikakushi for prereading this fic. They should've just put it down.
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Oh look at this sexy thing.
What the fuck is this.
7562684
Fucked if I know
Speaking of the farm but no mention of Granny Smith?
This is not ungood.
They targeted pears.
Pears.
We're a group of trees who will sit for hours, days, even weeks on end growing some of the tastiest, most pectin-rich fruits. Over, and over, and over all for nothing more than a little batch of seeds saying we did.
We'll punish our selfs doing things others would consider torture, because we think it's fun.
We'll spend most if not all of our free time min maxing the biochemical makeup of our reproductive apparatuses all to draw out a single extra point of reproductive fitness.
Many of us have made careers out of doing just these things: slogging through the grind, all day, the same fruit over and over, hundreds of times to the point where we know evety little detail such that some have attained such pear nirvana that they can literally bear fruit blindfolded.
Do these people have any idea how many insects have swarmed, limbs splintered, flowers and fruits destroyed 8n drought? All to latter be referred to as hardiness?
Pears are competative, hard core, by nature. We love a challange. The worst thing you did in all of this was to challange us. You're not special, you're not original, you're not the first; this is just another blight.
7562748
Is this what they call Poo-posting?
7562758
...yes :(
Oh but she did.
I'm idly wondering if Spike actually knows about the yoga lessons and was just playing dumb. Or if this stunt just resulted in him finding out. If it's the latter, he's a really good actor. Or did the Viggo Mortensen thing like when he broke his toe and rolled with it.
Either way. That's one down.
I forgot to mention this, but I think I caught one typo.
Shouldn't it be, "This has nothing to do with whether you're into both guys or girls..."?
7562836
Nah. Twilight's saying it doesn't matter to her if they're a same-sex couple or not. Thanks for bringing it up, though, and thanks for reading!
That pun was painful.
The chapter title itself deserves a like.
7563300
Well it's hard to argue with that. Thanks for giving it a try, though!
Next up on Spike's hit list: Angel.
That is, if he feels Twilight can convince Fluttershy to do that to her best friend...
That twist ending.
The fuck?
7562839
That's honestly what I thought it meant, too. But I was like, eh... just in case.
7563300
I'm not sure they actually did that. If you read until the end, it might really just have been a wrestling move.
Fluttershy, on the other hand, might be the one with the actual problem...
7563600
Well, if they're set in the same universe, then Fluttershy already did it.
https://www.fimfiction.net/story/319095/pop-goes-the-bunny
.... Have you been running lines of scratch-n-sniff pony pictures?
7564165
Okay I need to vent about something. The Applejack sticker smells like orange. Like, really? Just because she's the color orange, you have to make her smell like oranges? It isn't like there's another fruit that her character is more geared towards? Christ's sake, making her smell like an orange is so racist.
7564211
Applejack smells like oranges?
Well, Owl never be the same after reading this.
Geeze, I'm slow. I finally understand the meaning of the story's title.
The chapter title I got, the main title - not so much until now.
7563838 Heh, I actually read that story a while back. That's a little extreme for Fluttershy, though. She "fixed" him alright. Permanently.
7564926 I think Spike only pretended to love him. From Twilight's description of the sheets, I have to assume they really had sex and Spike didn't try to duplicate what he did in the actual episode by framing Owlowiscious with a look-alike liquid. It wouldn't make sense anyway for the act to be faked - Twilight seems to be able to understand owl-speak, and Fluttershy would certainly find out the truth before a Few of the Owl's Most Favorite Things were lost forever.
Spike has learned a valuable example from his parent:
If he disapproves of Twilight's "yoga" sessions with Rarity, he needs to wait until Twilight's asleep and have her fixed.