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Shining Armor isn’t convinced that Thorax can be trusted. In fact, he’s not so sure he can trust Spike or Twilight, either.
Twilight might not be sure of anything anymore.
Written for the F*** THIS PROMPT #14 event, with the prompt “Write a fixfic”.
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I fixed the episode
Yay
And then the Crystal Empire got taken over. Shining Armor got beaten again. Cadance got imprisoned. Again.
And Twilight said, "Karma".
Oh this looks hilarious.
Now this was pretty amusing. Take a like.
Fix? Debatable. Rendered delightfully absurd on multiple levels? Definitely. Best of luck in the contest.
7559311
Alternately, the fear and paranoia riddling the Empire rendered the Crystal Heart inert, allowing the arctic climate to sweep in. Shining Armor's last words were accusing his daughter of being a changeling.
Buckball?
7559390
That's from Buckball Season, two episodes after The Times They are a Changeling.
this was hilariously stupid
Not Bad. You did a pretty good job with the story. Your great!!!
7559523
#goals -o-
7559654
Well thank you, I'm glad to hear you think so :>
What happened to poor Thorax?
7559792
Oh, shoot, uh…
Later that day, they went back for Thorax and teleported him to the castle and locked him in a room until they could do something about him. Which they will, but tomorrow.
Sorry. I like Thorax, but I didn’t realize I just left him like that… x.x
7559836 Poor guy.
It's amazing how smart and neurotic Twilight can be, yet shining is just paranoid.
Twilight under stress is just too funny!
7559851
I know, but the point of the story was to leave everything unresolved. I just didn't realize I'd left Thorax in that bad of a condition. I'm sure he'll be back to his normal self soon, though ^^
7559854
Stressed Twilight = best Twilight >3>
7559856 I certainly hope so.
7559864
Yes, indeed!
Hmmm. Feels incomplete. But, its okay, its amusing to see even Cadence was convinced
Take my likes, mustaches, follows, and love.
I mean ALL my love.
These feels
7559269 Yes.
Yes you did.
I'm proud of you, adorable Scruchy-Face Twilight.
Do you want some ice cream? Let's go get some ice cream.
I enjoyed this very much.
7560495 Only if you win a...battle of wits?
7560580 The battle was over before it began.
I played that card last week.
Infinite Emrakul.
wait, You're fixing something that isn't broken and you latch on to the thorax episode?
So... is Twilight a changeling?
7559836
7560764 Would it matter if she was?
7560495 7560580
Are you kidding? I’ll take that offer unconditionally. It’s ice cream. o3o
7560679
Yus. I “fixed” an episode that only needed a little bit of fixing, and even though issues from the episode (that I had) are brought up, nothing actually gets fixed. It’s playing a bit on the idea of fixfics.
And not only that, but some people in the comments are writing mini-fics that "fix" this fixfic without really fixing it. It's glorious. -w-
7560764
What 7560808 said. :>
Hmm
I must admit, wouldn't they've realized sooner? Don't most changelings have green magic? Or am I thinking too much?
Probably thinking too much.
Otherwise, nice story.
7561034
That did cross my mind, and it's why I left Rarity out in the last scene. So it's just Fluttershy, Rainbow Dash, Pinkie Pie, and Applejack: all non-unicorns.
7560808
Well, it would make planning for dinner a lot easier.
Great story! You really captured everypony's likeness! =)
Ah， Thorax, my favourite changeling
7559269
Conglaturation, you are winner. You prooved the justice in Equestria. Now go and rest our heros.
Maybe Twilight but I can't see the whole Crystal Empire turning on a dime against Spike and rough treating him on Shining's word.
Seems they like their hero a lot more than their king(?) to the point of offering themselves up to take orders from the dragon.
7561344
They suspected Twilight and Spike were changelings, though, so they're turning against what they think are changelings. If a changeling took the place of their hero, that's all the more reason to treat the changeling roughly and find where the real Spike is. :O
Uh... did Thorax die?
They kinda left him, starving and freezing, in the middle of a snowstorm.
...Alternately, Thorax was proclaimed a hero for getting rid of the two evil changelings that replaced Princess Twilight Sparkle and Spike the Dragon.
I want to like and fave this story cause it's hilarious but I can't because it takes the characters of MLP to a whole new level of retarded. Like Shinings brain dead as hell, Cadence for some reason believed her brain dead husband, the other main six happen to be changelings for literally no reason, and when Twilight and Spike try to actually say 'we're not changelings and we can prove it' but everyone just has something shoved in their ears and something up their ass that it's both funny and so unbelievably infuriating that I just...can't. I'm sorry I still liked the story but still.
7561486
He didn't die :o I just didn't realize how bad a condition I'd left him in and now I feel bad about it :x So about that, see 7559836
7561520
I see what you mean. I agree, Shining and Cadence are acting stupid. It's part of why the AU tag and Comedy tag are up there.
One of my main problems with the episode was I thought Shining is a bit too paranoid to think all changelings are evil, so I ramped up his paranoia to conspiracy levels. It's exaggerated, but not completely unfounded or random. The fact that his wife agrees just kind of adds to the ridiculousness of it. They lash out decidedly for the reasons they state, which are conspiracy levels of stupid, as Twi points out. And the reason they dismiss proof that they're not changelings is because Shining realizes Twilight could be replaced by a changeling for years now, so there's no real way to prove one way or the other whether Twilight's a changeling.
It's stupid, it's ludicrous, but that's kind of the point. Sorry that you found it infruiating. :x
i confess...I wasn't that fond of this story. Leaving it unresolved, while I see why you did it, is rather...well, it causes it to lack issues, and, honestly?
It kinda wore out the "Main" trick INCREDIBLY quickly. After Twilight got exiled...the REALLY funny jokes were done. And, even then...it is the fic that has an important flaw.
Namely...it never moves beyond the basic premises. "Shining armor goes insane paranoid". And...that's it for the main deal. There's the "Thorax goes crazy" scene, and then...the "Okay, that's it. I'm done." scene.
7561580
I understand if you think part of it is funny and part of it isn't. Comedy is subjective and I understand that, and the beginning does have sort of a higher joke density than the rest.
I'm not sure what you mean by this:
Is it that you feel these things are unrelated? Do you mean not enough time/words were spent developing these events?
7559836 Maybe they can't tell one bug pony from the next? A bug pony did show up at that ass's wedding so... they not a big deal in Ponyville?
It goes all the way to the top!
7561599
Pretty much the "Need more time". And, most of the time spent in the last bit is, well, kinda just Twilight going "NOpenopenopenopenope." And, the joke of "The other mane six are changelings" is so out there it isn't really funny. Since...that's all we get.
Basically, it feels like the fic burned off all the good stuff in the first paragraph, and then just kinda...flounders. It's not badly written, I just don't think the design choices are best. You don't seem like a bad author, and it's not a BAAAD fic. But...it just doesn't really make me ROFL.
You have a good premise. But, a fic shouldn't just be "The premise". For instance..."Rainbow dash becomes a goddess" fic? It really goes into detail. Meanwhile, the "Nuggets" fic I just read has a REALLY good surprise punchline. This fic has neither.
My counter argument to Shining Armor. "We aren't Changelings, you are the real Changeling. You are trying to hard to deceive them and kick out your own sister. Its all a part of your plan to get rid of the only ones that can stop you. Don't you see, everyone in this room is probably a changeling, except Spike and I."
7561666
Okay. I think I understand, then.
All the issues are touched on briefly, you're right. My intent was to just pile on problem after problem and then the resolution is that Twilight just nopes out and decides to deal with it later. I guess I could've focused on just one problem and made that worse and worse. The thing is, I feel like if I focused on one of these problems, then the story would feel pretty standard. If I changed the rest of the story to focus on Shining's paranoia, I'd have a different story. The focus of this story is Twilight's stress and her reaction to all these crazy things happening. My hope was that the bad things happening here were not deep enough to require further exploring--I'm sure some people probably hoped for more paranoid Shining, but I tried to make him only paranoid so that you get the idea there and I could move on to the next thing and stress Twilight out more.
Sorry, I shouldn't be defending my story so much, but I'm just trying to maybe show you where I'm coming from with this story. I'll be thinking about this story so that I can hopefully learn from it. I like experimenting from time to time and seeing what works and what doesn't. ^^