• Member Since 8th Oct, 2012
  • offline last seen May 12th

Yinglong Fujun


I also draw. Maybe I draw too much and write too little.

E
Source

Spike woke up to find himself as his pony caretaker, Twilight Sparkle, while the original Spike somehow still acted like Spike himself. The now-pony decided to go about fixing it alone and not tell a soul about it.

Chapters (18)
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Comments ( 83 )

OK that cover art is pretty awesome and defiantly seems to fit this story's premise well.

Good job I'll definitely check this one out.

7561826 Thanks mate, I was just feeling quite skittish about submitting stories publicly, since I've only written stories for my own reading all these years, and I'm not sure if I've got this 'fanfic' thing right. Your kind words are very meaningful to me! :twilightsheepish:

7561843 ah yeah Iknow how that feels, iI wasn't sure about submitting storied either as I jad never written a fanfics before and it had been many years since I wrote anything to boot.

I have to say though it has helped me improve as a storyteller actually getting feed back on my work and there is nothing quite like seeing people enjoy what you have written.

7561858 I sure hope so. I'm already happy to have someone willing to spend time to read what I've written, anything more will be a bonus :twilightsmile:

7561868 I'mttaking a bit of a break from reading as I've burned out a bit on it but I'll be sure to read this and comment when I return to reading.

7561891 Cheers, take your time! Thanks for taking your time to comment again!

Spike fumbling through the plot as Twilight is fantastic.

So, I'm reading all of the "Spike becomes overlaid onto the other elements" stories you write, and I think I like this one the best, and I definitely like that Twilight is taking steps, here.

Seems like the chances of this turning out well is slim, at the moment...

>no next chapter :raritydespair:

7577482 Heh, I'm just glad that some fumbling is there, instead of being all perfect and like!

7583450 Cheers mate. I thought so after gathering some responses (and peeking at the like ratio). Still, this is a tagged as a comedy (eh...), and it won't go too sad or dark... I think, probably, yep.

Stopping the incident in semi-early stages before it starts... Huh.
I don't think anyone has done this before (except as a joke, in a comic). Kudos to you.

7590541 Cheers :twilightsheepish: Her expertise in magic is required for the later part of story, so an early encounter has to happen.

8

Now, this was better than how I expected you to introduce Starlight. Go on.

Early Starlight is a cool twist... and the mind control stuff that we know Starlight doesn't worry about too much forms an interesting thematic link.

This is certainly a... unique story. I've seen body switching stories before, but this is different. This is probably my favorite variation of the Spiketastic idea, not just due to the length, but also the first person narrative focus. The other Elements story has a lot more characters, and most of them act closer to normal. This new "Twilight" is sure different, all the memories and magic (and vocabulary, just "she" doesn't use all of it) and some mixture of her and Spike's personalities.

Funny, season six started with Spike and Starlight traveling around, and now this scenario is kind of similar in a way, a few years early. So Spike's presence is blocking the cutie mark spell, wonder what else has changed and what other experiments they'll get up to. Well, as long as Spike doesn't try more whacks to the head, that got the biggest result but that's too damaging.

First, sorry for the late reply! Real life and the writing of reference blog posts demanded too much of my attention...

7591386 Will try to keep going :twilightblush:

7602691 Ah, you're a very perceptive reader! :twilightsmile:

Edit: Holy cow, I just have a look of the last episode. Apparently she's really as mind-control-trigger-happy as I wrote. (Chapter 1 to the coming chapter 13 were chiefly written 4 months ago) I originally wrote based on the events in Cutie Re-Mark only. Sheesh, Starlight, even I am a bit unnerved...

7605145 I did want to add some twist to the age-old plot device, but it seems that the this kind of mind-screw now permeates many stories that I write :twilightblush: I also agree that the style is more mature in this story, but I will also try to improve upon the others as I write on.

And indeed, that's an Another Place, Another Time situation for the pair. I'm planning out the road-map for the story ahead, so these are my first concerns as well. As for repeated black-outs, I can't make firm promise that they won't reoccur and cause hilarious brain damage lead to advancement of plot :rainbowlaugh:

Edit 2: Forgot to say, I appreciate your reference to my silly name for the trio of stories! :twilightblush:

7605145

Well, as long as Spike doesn't try more whacks to the head, that got the biggest result but that's too damaging.

Yeah, but at least Twilight misses out on the crap Ditzy drops on her head this time. Insert joke using the word 'anvilicious' here.

c'mon spike, Starlight is well studied in mind magic, and your problem is clearly of the mind, so enlisting her help would come in handy

If Twilight-Spike is planning to tell Starlight about her problems, she should tell her before Spike-Spike can overhear by accident.

... But it might be fun for Starlight to meet Spike first, even if it's probably a better idea to tell her first instead.

It's hard to write anything coherently - English is not my native language, but in two words - excellent job in writing this story and instant fave after I completed the currently last chapter (14) - I simply could not stop the reading until it was finished.

7620814 And so she seems to agree to do so now... Seems to, heh.

7713595 Oh my, I'm going to have fun writing S-S and SG's interactions, haha!

7713649 Thank you so much, I appreciate it! And heh, English's not my mother tongue too, don't sweat it!

Does anyone know a groups for stories like these? It's a great genre

7738082 How specific is the genre you meant? Also thanks!

So it gets an itty-bittily bleak for a story with a comedy tag (Eh), but the possible consequences have to be clarified ahead. Also, the story zipper-merged with the canon again.

... what is Starlight's problem with Spike? Just sheer annoyance or contempt at him slamming into her shield?

She didn't have much context at the time to be jealous of him being Twilight's friend, although she might have by him running toward her excitedly immediately.

Pretty sharp contrast from canon, too, where they seem to get along really well.

7741293 It's bit of everything really. She was already in a bad mood, quite bummed out by Spike-Twilight's reluctance to reveal what she's hiding from her. So she kinda vented it on the closest individual that was not Twilight. And unlike canon Starlight, this Starlight was not on an explicit mission to learn friendship, and her 'deprogramming' was less intense, so some edge remained. The circumstances that they met were also different, but indeed they did not have inherent personality conflict of any kind, and they should in theory mesh well, as in canon and as S-T thought. As for friendship and jealousy, ah, it will be something to be explained more clearly.

Without getting too spoilery, I would say that conflicts and misunderstanding are fickle things, things could easily happen otherwise. But if they have the inherent capacity to get along, then they could perhaps eventually get over fickler things like a bad first impression and become good friends... When the time comes.

One of the better fics about "in a different body" theme. I like that you don't avoid the philosophical problems connected that stem from this scenario and that Twi Spike experiments with his condition (trip away and cutie mark spell).
Your story simply scratches the itch.

My only bit of criticism would be about trip away from Ponyville. I expected to see more interactions between Spike the Twilight and other regular characters and how he deals with pretending to be Twilight while at the same time having Spike the Dragon around.
But I believe since he came back to Ponyville I'll see more of that in the future chapters.

Cheers. :ajsmug:

7743834 Cheers mate, thanks a lot for your in-depth comment! I'm indeed considering the immediate direction of this story. I've had the long-term and the closing stretch planned out, but I'm still balancing the need to write about the bumbling fun caused by S-T pretending to be Twi, and my own consideration about how far it should go without getting egregious.

Pulling materials from episodes are fun and relatable and easier to write, and alternate perspectives are a big thing to me as well, so I'll definitely bite into it in the coming chapters.

Curious about how this will develop. Following now, hope for more soon :pinkiehappy:

I sighed and smirked. “If you really want to pay me back, it doesn’t have to be with bits.”

I then said something into his ears, and his eyes widened with shock, but also interest.

Spike, what are you doing... :unsuresweetie:

“So, what now?”

:facehoof::ajbemused:

Great, Starlight is an insanely powerful unicorn, clingy, and protective. No wonder she had only one friend... the rest were clearly trying to steal him!

7792468 By Discord's devious derriere, I swear I didn't write those double entendres intentionally!

7792918 I do think that this character archetype really spices things up, and makes things quite fun in general (not necessarily to the characters, but still). I believe this is somewhat similar to the concept those oriental animation connoisseurs call ts- tu- tsun... whatwasit... :unsuresweetie:

7793426 Whelp, I guess some copious splashing of red would indeed fertilize the soil and help the oak tree grow. Time to rewrite the future snippets and slap certain tags on the story.

... Kidding. But the crazy and the clingy is separated by a line ever so thin. :pinkiecrazy:

Hm. The second half of the chapter was pretty good. :)
Yay!

This is yer strongest chapter so far!!!
Wow! Ah was mildly interested in your first. But this... This second chapter is what's impressive!

Ah hope it stays at this high quality. :D

Twilight Sparkle is The Dovahkin! Dragonborn!

This is nice.

Ah'm impressed that the quality hadn't dipped despite the lack of comments. Huh.

Ah like this!

Ah'm so happy you got featured. Yer first chapter was just so "bleh" that ah didn't expect any of this amazingness!
You really know yer stuff! Haha :D

Thank ye kindly for sharin!

This is just so nice.

You deserve hundreds of compliments :o

This is nice.

A bit plain compared to the other chapters. But it's nice.

Daww.

A bit short.

But daww.

Kinda short...
And um it was okay.

Ah liked the Luna reference though. That was nice.

Twilight, Princess of Foalnapping! :D Dun Dun Dun!!!!


Haha. Ah had fun with this chapter.
The transition was jarring and painful; however, ah had fun.

Obviously, ah had fun because ah think Starlight Glimmer is KeWL. But if somepony else read this, not knowin' Starlight, this chapter would be considered pretty subpar. It kinda reminded me of yer shaky first chapter, tbh.

Regardless, ah liked the chapter. Mostly cause that's what mah personal tastes are. Sure, the chapter could have been written hundreds of times better. But, at least ah smiled. An' ah'm curious about what will happen next.

Ah liked the cousin bit. Ah thought it was also funny how you had us guessin' if Twilight had amnesia again.

Still. this chapter was kinda dull and exposition forced.
Ah had some fun though. Thank you for sharing!

The last fourth was good.

Too much forced dialog for mah taste. But ah'm glad it ended on a positive note.

Ah like this. Written well an' whutnot.
Still, um, that was like super short. Liek... Short.

A solid, strong chapter.

Ah'm happy. :)
The story is fun again! Huzzah!

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