A Doctor, a Scientist, and a Cardinal walk into a Casino.
Two earth ponies and a dwarf griffon stepped out onto the streets of Las Pegasus amidst a large crowd of tourists doing the same. Two of them began coughing immediately.
"Sweet Celestia!" Twilight exclaimed as she attempted to wave away the smell with a forehoof. "What on Equis is that smell?"
Discord inhaled deeply through his new pony nostrils, and released it with a contemplative lip-smacking. "The aroma of cheap fried foods, discount cigar smoke, and a large amount of very cheap perfume." He grinned knowingly. "Consider it your Las Pegasus welcome package. Don't worry, you'll get used to it in a few minutes."
Discord guided his still hacking companions away from the train station's exit and out of the main flow of traffic. As they gradually acclimatized themselves to the smells of the city, Spike, whose griffon hardiness had allowed him to recover much more quickly, took a moment to take in the city.
It was a grand affair. The buildings were tall, not a big as the skyscrapers of Manehatten, but far more lavishly decorated. Neon seemed to be the generally agreed upon theme, and the architects and decorators had apparently leapt on it with a passion. There wasn't a single building that didn't have either it's edges strung out in lights or an oversized mascot prancing across its surface in garish reds and greens. While most buildings looked very modern, others bucked the trend in the face as they graced themselves with the architectural stylings of ancient times or foreign realms. Layered pagodas squeezed themselves in between futuristic spires and stylish hotels. Every building had a name, proclaimed in large vibrant letters, and each seemed to be trying to outdo their neighbors in sheer scale and gaudyness.
Besides the lights and color was the constant unending noise. Beyond the general hubbub standard of any place with a large group of ponies, there was also the whirling, dinging, music and sounds which spilled forth from every open door. Every building had it's own soundtrack of games and ambiance, and they all played at once.
"This doesn't look anything like how Fluttershy described it." Spike murmured.
"And why is it so dark?" Twilight questioned, having finally adjusted enough to breathe and talk normally. "We should be well into late morning by now, but it's still so dim."
She was right. Despite the excess of neon, the city was surprisingly devoid of natural light. But then again, there was so much neon that most visitors probably would never even realize it. If some sort of sudden massive power failure was to occur, the city would probably be in pitch darkness.
"I believe I can answer both your concerns at once," Discord said. "Just look up."
They turned their eyes skyward. Above them sat a very thick cloud layer, heavy and dense. It would have seemed completely ordinary, if it weren't for a few small oddities. Here and there, various things seemed to poke down through the cloud. The bottom edge of some sort of of golden construction, a section that seemed to be in perpetual drizzle, even one particularly obvious section that looked like the bottom floors of a building.
"No way," Spike breathed, "Is... is there another city built right above this one?"
"Not another city, per say," Discord clarified, "But close enough. That," he pointed, "Is New Las Pegasus. Or Upper Las Pegasus, or just uptown Las Pegasus. The naming debate goes back decades. Chances are that's where Fluttershy visited, otherwise I doubt she would have returned with such fond memories of the place. Lots of mass entertainment centers up there as well as the middle-tier resorts. It's all very foal and family friendly."
"Down here, however," he gestured back to the hustle and bustle of their surroundings, "Is the Las Pegasus that's been building on itself and becoming more and more extravagant over the last five hundred years."
"Amazing..." Twilight mused, "I had no idea this city had such a unique history and design."
"Well yes, I rather doubt you'd have found anything about Las Pegasus in a textbook on magical theory. Game theory perhaps, but that's beside my point."
They probably would have continued staring at the sky for a good while longer if it weren't for three sparkly dressed mares with obviously dyed manes who called out to them from a nearby alley.
"Hey there," the pink maned one called, "You look a little lost. First time in the city?" At Twilight's hesitant nodding, she smiled. "Well, perhaps what you stallions need is three lovely young mares to show you around?"
"Um..." The cyan maned pegasus and clearly youngest of the group piped in, "I think the one in the jacket is a mare." Good looks aside, her whispering skills were atrocious.
"I have no problem with that," pink mane replied smoothly, though she did adjust her pose ever so slightly.
"How about you old timer?" The eldest mare of the group who sported a lime green mane addressed Discord. "You look like ya know your way around the block, but I bet there's still something new I could show ya."
Discord raised an eyebrow. Whether it was due to being addressed as an "old timer" or the intricate dance the mare's eyebrows seemed to be doing, the world would never know. There was a pause for a moment before limey gave the cyan maned mare a light cuff to the back of the head. She snapped to full attention immediately.
"Oh! My turn. Right, yes. Hello there you..." she drifted off as she finally took in Spike's crimson form. A cross of surprise and confusion overtook her face as she found herself a at a loss for words. An awkward silence arose between the two groups, as they each waited to see just where in the world she would go with this.
Eventually, limey leaned in towards her compatriot and whispered, "Why'd you stop?"
"Well... he... I mean she.. or is it... well it's a griffon!"
Her whispering had surprisingly not improved since several moments prior.
"So?"
"So, I don't know what I'm supposed to say to a griffon!"
"And if you don't know what to say then you..." Limey said leadingly.
"Oh, right! The manual." From somewhere within the sequins of her outfit, the mare pulled out a battered and weathered old book. Half the pages looked like they were held together with little more than good faith, but still the small mare leafed through confidently. Twilight and Discord shared a look as the mare searched through her book's index. A brief but very complex series of exchanges (consisting entirely of minor head shakes and gestures, widenings of the eyes, and eyebrow movement) resulted in the agreement that they should probably leave, but didn't know how to best break off the interaction. Meanwhile, Cyan had come across a problem.
"It doesn't say anything about small red griffons."
"Then use the default."
"Oh, good idea." More pages turned.
"Oh this is embarrassing." Pink bemoaned as she turned her gaze skyward. "First potential clients of the shift and she's ruined the whole mood before we could even get started."
"Lay off' 'er, she's still new."
"Not that new. She should be able to improvise by now. It's a fundamental skill."
"Ah ha! Here's the griffon section." She cleared her throat and began reciting in a stilted and awkward voice. "Hey there young... cub slash chick. That's some nice... plumage you have there. Tell me... is that ruff natural or did you do it... yourself?"
She looked up with wide expecting eyes, ready and prepared to to be showered with praise for her stunning delivery. Unfortunately, the sight which met her eyes was that of her three potential patrons already a significant distance away and blending into the crowd.
Another admonishing blow came to the back of her head. "Nice goin'. You botched the delivery and they left before you could seal the deal."
Cyan rubbed the back of her head and her reply was soft and subdued. "I'm sorry..."
Pink rolled her eyes. "Keep this up and you'll be a novice until you're my age."
"Now don't be like that, not everypony gets it right off the bat." Limey placed a comforting hoof around Cyan's depressed form. "Don't let her get you down. You're out here with us to get field experience, and that exactly what you're doing. Learn from your mistakes. Study that manual for the basics and practice bein' flexible like. Work hard an' before you know it, you'll rank up from a novice, to a journeymare, all the way to an officially sanctioned, union approved Las Pegasus tour guide!"
She lifted her cyan mane to dry her eyes, revealing her yellow roots in the process. "You... you really think so?"
"I know so. Now buck up filly. Plenty more ponies'll be headed our way once the express train gets here. Lots of impressionable tourists with outdated maps in need of a fresh-faced young tour guide."
After escaping their woefully misinterpreted first interaction, Twilight and company merged with the ponies traversing the main street of Las Pegasus. The crowd was thick as groups and individuals alike made the trek between hotels, casinos, and restaurants with little to no regard for wherever anyone else was trying to go.
Discord, of course, seemed perfectly at ease with this natural occurrence of chaos. He bobbed and weaved amongst the crowd like a swimmer, perfectly timing every backpedal and sidestep to avoid collision by slightest of margins, making the whole thoroughfare seem like a well rehearsed choreography.
Twilight, however, was not having quite as much success navigating the crowd. Growing up in Canterlot, where the guards enforced the rules of the road, and subsequently living in Ponyville, where the pedestrian to street size ratio was healthily low, had left her ill-equipped to handle the dense traffic of Las Pegasus. There was no order, no logic, not even dedicated sections for "ponies going roughly up the street" versus "ponies generally travelling downward". Every step seemed to invite somepony to cut her off, and every startled backstep led to a minor collision and a flurry of apologies. Her mouth soon set itself to autopilot in an endless stream of "Excuse me. Pardon me. Sorry. Excuse me. Terribly sorry. Coming through. If you could just... sorry, go ahead then."
Spike had given up entirely and was riding the trip out on Twilight's back. His foreclaws gripped the two locks of mane that continued to fall in front of her eyes, which had the dual effect of keeping her vision clear and also giving him a way to hold on as she stumbled along. A few ponies gave them odd looks, but most just brushed it off as another one of Las Pegasus's eccentricities.
After running into umpteenth pony, Twilight snorted in frustration. "This is ridiculous. We'll never make any progress at this rate." She cast her gaze about, over what limited distance she could cover. She hadn't seen Discord in minutes, after he had slipped through the crowd. She took a deep breath to call out for him. "Di- Hey!" But the first syllable became strangled in her throat as Spike gave a sudden sharp tug to his hair reins.
She shot him a look. "What was that for?"
"You were about to yell out for him." Spike replied, "But we're using code names, remember?"
"Once we find the cult sure, but do we really need to start using them now?"
"Cultists could be anywhere," his avian eyes scanned the crowd warily, giving off a frightening aura despite his size. "Better safe than sorry, right?"
"I suppose that's rational." She readied herself to call out for him once more, before she paused and turned back to Spike sheepishly. "Ah... what was his code name again?"
"Disco," he replied without missing a beat, "Dr. Fevered Disco."
"Right." She called out for him, using his proper name this time, even as a small voice in the back of her mind worried that he'd already gotten bored with that name and chosen another without telling them. Luckily though, he'd apparently stuck with it.
"You rang?" Discord asked, making Twilight jump as his voice came from her immediate left.
"Don't do that." she complained, "We need to stay together, stay focused, and not wander around."
"Wandering? Wandering? Why I'm not wandering." He looked aghast. "Wandering implies that I have no clear goal, direction, or idea of where I am, and I have all of those things in abundance. I'm merely moving effectively through the crowd. Something it seems you could use a few pointers on."
She rolled her eyes, but allowed a small smirk to escape onto her features. "Alright, fair point. But could you at least stay close? I doubt it'll be easy to find each other if we get too separated."
"Fine." Discord agreed, taking to the front as he began to lead the group forward. He still bobbed and weaved around the incoming ponies, occasionally slipping back alongside Twilight as the crowds allowed, but at least they were steadily moving forward as a single unit.
"So Disc-" Twilight was once again interrupted, this time by a hoof to her muzzle.
"Ah ah ah," Discord chided, "Code names, remember?"
Twilight grumbled irritably. "If I still had my magic," she muttered, "it wouldn't even be a problem."
"Magic?" Discord inquired, "Of course you still have your magic. You're just disguised after all. It's a lot easier to try and disguise an alicorn than reverse the process of making one."
Twilight paused as she shifted her focus upward curiously. Sure enough, she could still feel the electric tingle of her magic just fine, despite the apparent lack of a physical appendage. She stopped walking and concentrated, causing a young stallion going to other way to bump into her. Ignorant to or just ignoring the contact, Twilight continued and a barely noticeable pink aura covered the group for a moment before dissipating.
The spell cast, she let out a small breath of relief. "There. I cast a privacy spell on us. We can say anything we want and all anypony else will hear is murmured gibberish, designed to blend in with ambient crowd noise." She shot both Discord and Spike a look. "So can I please ask something without being shushed?"
"Have it your way." Discord acquiesced, having bobbed around to her other side while she was distracted. "But you'll wish you had used this time to practice when it comes down to the real thing."
She nodded. "We'll cross that bridge when we come to it. Now," Twilight paused to collect her thoughts, accidentally coming between a meandering elderly couple in the process. She apologized briefly, only for the stallion to shake his cane and mutter about young ponies and their gibberish slang as he left in a huff.
"Anyways," Twilight picked up, "I was going to ask where you two thought we might start looking for the cult headquarters. With a city this size, going street by street would be incredibly inefficient."
"I dunno," Spike replied, "I pretty much figured that Discord'd have a plan. Like maybe he could scan the city for pockets of concentrated chaos."
"No can do Spike." Discord suddenly was in front of the group walking towards them. "While of course I could do that, though honestly I probably wouldn't anyway, far too straightforward for my tastes, in the unlikely event that this cult has actually managed to tap into the Great Chaotic Manifold, they might by able to detect a sudden surge of chaos magic like me nearby. And it wouldn't do to tip our hand prematurely."
"Wait," Twilight interjected, "So you can't use any of your chaos magic?"
"Well... I didn't say that." He tapped one side of his ruddy coat proudly, causing a slight clicking. "I've prepared a few... let's call them 'artefacts'... just in case we end up a little deeper than I can bluff our way out of." He paused for a moment, frowning. "Also, imagine that when I said that, I had done so while slowly sinking into the ground, leaving just my lips above the surface. Ugh, it's been five minutes without constant chaos magic and already I'm sick of this."
"Do you really think they're that much of a threat?" Spike asked as he subtly steered Twilight to the left, turning a potential collision into a minor shoulder brushing. "I mean, what are the chances they actually have chaos magic?"
"Low, I'll admit." Discord admitted in a low voice, "But when it comes to anyone other than me using chaos magic, I say better safe than sorry." He faded into the crowd, only to pop up once more on Twilight's opposite side. "Even then, that's only one of three possible scenarios."
"Three?" Spike questioned as he pulled Twilight's mane again, earning him a grunt from the mare as he once more barely steered her away from a collision.
"Well, top three most likely. Most cults fall into one of three types." Discord began to count off on one hoof, apparently forgetting that he lacked claws at the moment. "There's a good chance it's probably a bunch of angsty teens, disillusioned with the world, and making a big fuss by rebelling against everything their parents ever told them about embracing harmony and togetherness by focusing on chaos instead. Maybe rented themselves a clubhouse and bought some advertisements by putting the bill on their rich daddies' dimes. On the other hand, it could be a scam. Somepony trying to make money by offering up the unspecified benefits of whatever they define chaos to be. Ripping off down and out ponies with vague platitudes and inspirational quotes, that sort of thing." He shrugged. "And yes, it could also be someone who's tapped into actual chaos magic and styled themself a divine being or something. Good odds it's one of those three. Anyway, to answer your question, no Spike. I don't have any sort of plan to find them. More fun that way."
He sidled up close to Twilight and patted her saddlebags. "Also, Twilight, please keep a better eye on your belongings. You've been pickpocketted three times already and I'm only letting you know because it's getting boring pickpocketing the pickpockets and placepocketing the things back in your bag."
"Well that's just great then!" Twilight exclaimed in a final burst of frustration. Despite doing her best to keep her cool, the constant noise and pushing and shoving and pushing and smells of Las Pegasus had been grinding her nerves down to a fine wire since she'd stepped off the train. Discord's nonchalant attitude had just been the straw that broke the hippocampi's back. "We have no plan on how to find them, and a skeleton of a plan of what comes next once we do! What do we do now?! I suppose we should just wander the city until we find a giant neon sign that says 'Secret Chaos Cult Headquarters! Right this Way! Sign up now to win a free toaster!' ?"
Twilight's rant left her breathing hard and posed on her hind legs, having used her forelegs to gesticulate the grandeur of the supposed signs. A small open space had formed around her, edged with ponies either trying to discreetly escape the crazy mare or wondering if this was a live advertisement for some attraction. Discord applauded softly as he came up along side and began directing her away. Apparently this was enough to convince most ponies it was some sort of show, and they quickly lost interest.
"Ooh, very good show of frustration. I didn't know you were such a method actor. I certainly was convinced. Now just keep that feeling in mind when the curtain parts and the real show begins."
Discord slowly nudged Twilight this way and that, effectively guiding her through the crowd and away from the scene of her outburst as he continued. "As for your question, essentially, yes. Literally, well, it may be more likely than you might think. They're not exactly trying to hide in the shadows."
"Yeah," Spike agreed. "I mean we're here because we saw an ad in the mail. "
"Besides, it really doesn't matter." Discord spun Twilight around suddenly, leaving her dazed and unfocused for a brief moment, "Because we're here."
"What makes you say..." Twilight began a rebuttal, but the words died on her tongue. At some point, they had apparently turned off the main road and onto a side street, possibly several times. None of the buildings looked familiar, which was certainly saying something given their stalwart refusal to look like each other. The building in front of her in particular was a skyscraper, in a technical sense. To be more accurate, it was a sky piercer, being so tall that clearly went on up and through the cloud layer without any sign of tapering off. It's decoration was gaudy, but no more so than it's neighbors. What made it so unique was what the designers had chosen for their logo. There was on outline in pink neon of a large cloud, which 'dripped' brown neon droplets. At the center of the cloud were several long spiraling strands of green and orange lights, which turned on and off rapidly to make the whole shape look like it was spinning into itself. The sign below the logo read 'Chaos Central Casino'.
If that wasn't enough, the marquee board over the entrance read: Proud Headquarters of the Chaos Connection. New Members Welcome! Now featuring the vocal stylings of Scherzo Concerto!
Spike hopped off Twilight's back and stepped forward inquisitively. He tilted his head left, then right, allowing him to take in the whole building to it's fullest. Satisfied, he nodded and turned back to the still gob smacked Twilight. "Yeah, I've got a pretty good feeling this is it."
"I guess so." Twilight admitted. "I don't know how we got here or how we missed it before, but this is definitely the place. The cotton candy cloud is rather a dead giveaway. It is kind of your thing, isn't it Discord?"
"No." He replied bluntly. "It is not my thing, it is a thing which I did once. That's the trouble with pony-created chaos. You're like parrots. You latch on to two or three non-sequiturs and repeat them over and over like they're still chaotic in any usage and quantity. Cotton candy clouds and chocolate rain are no more my thing than anything else I've ever done."
"What if I were to try and take over again?" He asked rhetorically. "Do you think it'd be all checkerboard fields and long-legged rabbits? Of course not! Maybe the ground would be like soft candle wax, with crystalline gypsum trees that grow Istallion cuisine. Where gravity is always adjacently perpendicular, and giant moths of flame perform aerial ballet with fish of living water through obsidian clouds." He sighed wistfully, as his poetic narrative turned internal.
After a few moments he shook himself from his trance and returned to the present as he noticed the odd looks Twilight and Spike were giving him. "Ahem, yes, right. Nevermind that. Anyway I'm not a fan of repetition and don't like being defined by any one thing I've done." He rubbed his head with a soft wince.
Twilight approached and put a comforting hoof across his withers. "Are you all right?"
"Yes, yes." He waved off her concerns. "This city is making it hard to concentrate and stay focused, and the chocoate rain thing is sort of a raw nerve, that's all." He shook his head, as if trying to physically shake free the cloud from his mind, and regrew his trademark grin. "I'm sure I'll be fine once we get inside and I can slip into a character. And now's a good a time as ever for us to get started." With that, he began a brisk trot towards the revolving doors. "Last one in gets their cover story dictated by the others!"
Twilight floundered for a moment before her brain caught up and she started after him, with Spike half-running half-flapping behind. Having a lucky thought, she quickly remembered to dispel the privacy charm before Discord could talk to anypony. She grunted as her shoulder hit the revolving door head on, but met more resistance than expected. Spike slipped into the same section of door just before the gap could close behind him.
"Is it just me," Twilight grumbled as the door made it's languidly slow rotation, "Or does Discord seem even more irksome and annoying than usual?"
Spike shrugged. "I dunno. I guess? Maybe he's trying to make up for not being able to do his visual gags."
"Maybe. Come help me push this. We need to get in there before he says or does anything ridiculous that we'll need to support."
The interior of Chaos Central Casino was pleasantly warm, a dear relief from the permanently undercloud chill of the city outside. A subtle electric tingle in the revolving doors indicated the presence of an air-freshening enchantment that likewise kept the smell of the city at bay. Unfortunately, there was nothing that could be done about the noise. Though less cacophonous than outside, the air was still rich with clicking, ringing, laughter and conversation, all bubbling over the music of some big band tune which was magically attuned to sound like it came from everywhere at once.
The main hall was set with a rich wine carpet, crisscrossed with gold thread to make a pattern of diamonds across the floor. A row of golden columns lifted the vaunted ceiling and created a pathway to the front desk. Past the columns on either side were rows of slot machines (abundantly occupied), with more refined and sophisticated games further on. The front desk was backed by a statued water feature, behind which was a raised area with various stairs, elevators, and customer services. A pair of overly wide staircases arched around from behind the fountain to come to a rest either side of reception desk, which was staffed by four mares with identical blazers, hats, and plastic smiles.
All in all, it was a very normal (if absurdly opulent and extravagant) casino. The only chaotic element would be Discord himself, though still in disguised pony form, who was nearly within the receptionists' conversation range.
"Hello, hello! Greetings and salutations!" Discord greeted with a bow and a flourish to the nearest receptionist.
She smiled cordially. "Hello sir, and welcome to the Chaos Central Casino and Hotel."
"Yes thank you dearie, lovely. Now I'm sure you know who I am so there no need for an introduction." He gave one anyway. "Disco, Doctor Disco, Doctor Fever Disco. I could go on but then we'd be here all day. Now I am sure you know all about my situation with the retirement and such." He leaned in conspiratorially and switched to a faux conspiratorial whisper. "Those papers, how do they get their sources?" He chuckled mirthfully.
The voice Discord had chosen for his character was a particular favorite of his. The pitch was higher than his usual timbre, and had a crispness to it that made everything sound somehow more intense. He spoke with a brisk staccato, never once fumbling or tripping over his words, occasionally stretching out a vowel to add almost a musical quality to it. If Spike was to categorize the voice, given his talent for mimicking such, he would place it somewhere between "wheedling aristocrat" and "boundlessly confident salespony". Discord had spent years fine tuning this voice, such that it had the most useful quality of making anyone who heard it think of him as trustworthy, knowledgeable, and above all, honest.
"Anyway," he continued, "I've heard it said on the breeze that there's a most interesting association based here. And since the board voted me out I've found myself afflicted with the most terrible malaise. I've been looking for something new and invigorating to sink my considerable fortune into, and I have high hopes for this being it. That is, if this is in fact the location of the society of which I have been lead to believe it is?"
The receptionist blinked in shock for a moment as she processed his rapid-fire monologue. To her credit, she recovered quickly. "Yes sir, Doctor. I do believe you have come to the right place. I take it you would like a room then?"
"I should think so. I hardly think I'll be able to come to any sort of important decisions in the span of a single day. No, this is the sort of engagement that behooves one to invest a certain amount of time. I prefer to fully engulf myself in new situations. Really get the full experience, you know. I think at least three months will be necessary. I will, of course, be paying up front."
"Yes sir, a three month stay." The mare pulled out a small binder from behind her desk and flipped it open to a royal blue tabbed section near the middle. "I believe we have an Executive suite available for immediate use. It comes fully stocked with all amenities and-"
"Dearie," Discord interrupted with an ever so slight glint of iron in his voice. "I haven't stayed in an executive suite since I made my first million."
"Oh, I'm so sorry sir. Please forgive my misstep." She quickly flipped ahead in her book toward a gold tabbed section. "Ah, we do have a Grand Royale Suite available, if that would be more to your-"
"Surely, in an establishment of this size, I should expect there to be a Princess level suite, shouldn't I?" That bit of iron had turned to steel.
The receptionist's mouth gaped for a moment as she flubbed her words. Her hooves automatically, if shakily, turning to the single black tabbed page at the end of the binder. "Y-Y-Yes sir," she finally managed, "We- we do have a Princess suite, but... but it's usually reserved for visiting heads of state or, dare I even consider it, the Princesses themselves. A-And even then it's usually booked only days at a time."
"Sounds splendid." The jovial warmth had returned to his voice. "I'll take it." He reached into his suddenly very expensive looking jacket as the poor mare continued stuttering her way through some sort of reply or comment. Pulling out a large velvet bag he began to count out a series of coins. Very quickly though, he lost interest and casually tossed the entire bag onto the counter. The drawstring held most of the contents inside, but a coins managed to slip out onto the desk. They glinted in the light from the chandelier, slightly larger than standard bits, silver tinged with a faint iridescent gleam.
"Will a thousand platinum bits be sufficient? I can acquire more, of course, but I hesitate to carry more than a little walking around money at any time." He tapped the side of his nose knowingly.
The mare gaped unabashedly and bag of bits which, in all likelihood, was more than her family had ever earned for the past three generations combined. Luckily for her, her adjacent coworker had been discreetly paying attention to the conversation, and had done better with keeping her wits about her. With a smooth slide and a subtle push, the new receptionist took over from her compatriot (who's brain had finally threw in the towel and allowed her to faint). She tapped a bell and a young pegasus in similar uniform swooped down from somewhere to land at her side. She whispered harshly into his ear as his eyes widened in shock. Following his orders promptly, the errand colt rushed off, bag of bits in tow.
She smiled with utmost respect at the most important guest the establishment had ever had the pleasure to serve. "Sorry about that sir, your payment is most sufficient and is being processed now." By this time, Twilight and Spike had finally made their way across the unnecessarily long entryway and stood at Discord's sides. The receptionist shot them a glare. "Excuse me, but I am currently helping this fine gentlestallion right here. If you need assistance, please either wait respectfully behind him or see one of my associates to your right."
"Ah, they're with me. Did I not mention that?" Discord gestured toward Twilight. "This is Nova Flicker, my financial advisor and consultant." A sudden wicked grin appeared on his face. "Also, my beloved niece. Isn't that right dear?"
"Wha- I- niece?!" Twilight gasped in sudden and understandable confusion. "I'm no-" She started to refuse before catching herself. No matter how ridiculous or nonsensical a concept it may be, the claim had been made and there was no going back on it now. The second he spoke, the relationship had become an established part of their backstory, and any action on her part to alter or refuse would only serve to make things difficult for all of them. The only possible choice was to play along.
Which was not to say that she couldn't still get Discord back for this. Quickly, Twilight ran through all the backstory and personality she'd designed for her Triton character back in the game. How would she respond in this scenario? A bit rough, a bit sarcastic? Twilight could work with that.
"Er, right, dear Uncle." She replied through gritted teeth that she made sure the receptionist could see. "And what about that little conversation we had earlier? About keeping this relationship professional while in public? Are we just not doing that now?" She gave him a rough, but familial, whap to his withers.
Discord merely guffawed, regrettably unfazed by the blow, "Nova, you need to lighten up. Stop worrying about appearances and money all the time and try to relax. Might do you some good." He turned to Spike, who had been discreetly snickering over Twilight's predicament. "Also, this is Dantalion, my valet and assistant. Where I go, he goes."
"I- Wha?" Spike balked, before quickly coming to the same conclusions that Twilight had. "I mean... yes."
"Yes what?"
"Yes... sir?"
"Good lad." Discord turned back to the receptionist. "They will need accommodations as well. I trust the Princess suite is large enough?"
"Yes sir, you'll have the entire floor to yourselves." At this time, the pegasus colt returned, bagless but with a slip of paper. He passed it to the receptionist, nervously glanced at probably the most important ponies he'd ever seen, and quickly left to attend to other duties. The mare read the paper quickly before turning back to the guests. "Your suite has been prepared, valued guests. In addition, the proprietor has extended to you all level one gold memberships, and would like to meet in pony whenever it may best suit you."
"I'm sure we'd love to meet them as well." Twilight replied.
The receptionist opened a small door and stepped out before bowing slightly. "If you'll follow me please, I will show you to your suite. Following that, we have also arranged a short tour since you expressed interest in the Society." She turned and began walking up the grand staircase.
Twilight leaned in to whisper to Discord as they followed. "I really hope you have some kind of plan and aren't just making this all up as you go along. All this money isn't very discreet. And also, a niece and servant? If I find out you're just getting your kicks in at the expense of our investigation..."
"Have faith, Nova dearie," he replied without breaking character or changing his voice, "The best key to any door is an old stallion with too many bits and not enough sense. Works wonders in big cities where they're used to preying on the rich and overconfident. They also won't dream of separating master and servant, and a familial connection will keep you nearby as well. Not to criticize your acting, but I doubt you'd have been able to pull off being either my daughter or marefriend, so I chose the next best thing."
Twilight was surprised. She hadn't expected Discord to have planned things out so meticulously. Her image of him was starting to improve.
That image then shattered once more as he broke out into barely contained giggles. "Plus the looks on your faces when I said it! Oh the room was expensive, but that was priceless. I'll be pulling that from my memory and framing later."
Twilight rolled her eyes and smiled. No matter the circumstances, Discord would always be Discord.
Ahead of them, the receptionist waited at the doors of an elevator, patiently waiting to shepherd them into the belly of the beast.
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I dunno, I personally like it when Discord has to use his talents as a trickster because he can't just waltz in and chaos everything up. His whole performance as Dr. Fever Disco was great, and the fact that he actually put some thought into the cover stories he invented for the other two was very nice. I also like the idea of multi-level Las Pegasus enough that I might actually use it in my own stuff.
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I didn't say it was boring, just more of a challenge to pull off from a writing perspective. :)
I'm also rather proud of the multi-level trick. Most people's mental image of Las Vegas is at night, plus I wanted something a little grimier than the giant arcade/epcot center that was shown in canon.
(Plus, just imagine the logistics of having a train pull up to a cloud city!)
Discord is one of my favorite characters for a reason. This chapter showcases that reason quite well.
I doubt you see Luna complaining about Luna's Witnesses. :-)
I think the challenge of writing him like this was a boon, to be honest. He really shone in this chapter.
And the more "seriousness" of the plot, while keeping Discord funny and chaotic in his own way made this amazing.
So far, the best Discord-centric story I've read. (Others have included him to great effect, but this is the best that has him as a main character.)
Haha, I absolutely love how you write Discord, this is great. :D
Such a gentlestallion. It figures that he'd know exactly what to say to manipulate those ponies so flawlessly.
I'm quite enjoying your Discord. He's smart, cunning, canny, and experienced without being just a chessmaster playing a game, he's also a being of Chaos who goes wherever the whim takes him and does whatever strikes his fancy in any particular moment. While also now attempting to accommodate friends and their well-being and wishes into his Chaos.
And that's a good point about the cotton candy clouds with chocolate milk rain. Stories do tend to pigeonhole his chaos into only that and other things like it when the point is: It's chaos.
Reading an E-Rated story. Advertisement at the bottom is for a sexual-themed game.
derpicdn.net/img/2017/5/20/1441195/full.gif
Anywho, love the story! Discord's characterization is remarkably better than I can manage, and everything else- jokes, chaos, plot, character, setting, rtc. -flows naturally. I'll be watching this one.
I disagree, I laughed my ass off with this chapter. I loved it and would kill to write like you. Very well done, can't wait for more.
YAY!
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Thanks! Glad to know I've tapped into the right vein!
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Ooh I could certainly point you to some that put this to shame. I've a whole bookshelf just for Discord stories.
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The only trouble with them is that they're 90% threshals and batponies, so they always show up at your door at like 3:00 AM just when you're going to sleep.
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Thanks, and he certainly has had plenty of time to practice. After all, what else is there to do when you're cooped up for a thousand years except mentally script and rehearse theoretical conversations you may or may not ever have?
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Yes, admittedly that was me using Discord as a mouthpiece to rant my own feelings a little. There's just so many stories where Discord goes rogue or reverts and *snap* everything looks exactly like it did when he first broke out. Then again, even I'm falling for the trope of using a really obvious cover name (I'm amazed how many stories give Discord the incognito name "Drocsid" or "Mr. Ord" and leave it at that. At least with this name he can justify it that his 'parents' wanted him to be a dancer but he got into medicine instead).
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Eh, what can you do? If anything that says more about your browsing habits than me. And thanks for the praise! The trick is that I keep a particular other character in mind when I write his lines (and no it's not Q).
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Thanks, maybe I've misjudged it after staring at and rereading it so many times. You know what they say, you're your own worst critic.
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Yay indeed. (Also, best avatar icon I've seen in a good while!)
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Dude, I only use FiMfiction, Google, Discord, and YouTube, and I avoid clopfiction like a vampire avoids daylight. I thinks it's just one of FiMfiction's sponsors or something, I didn't think it had anything to do with you.
Another character, hm? Interesting...
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Thanks!
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Did you know a single Luna's Witness can eat up to 1,200 insects an hour? They're worth the annoyance if they keep the mosquitos down.
Welp, I guess you have to live with it now Twilight.
https://m.It’s been established.
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I knew that bit felt familiar when I was writing it, but I just couldn't put my finger on what it was!
Excellently spotted!
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Excellently written!
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Indeed, it's interesting and surprisingly refreshing seeing this take of the Lord of Chaos.
Nice work.
"Ahem... oh mighty and illustrious predator of ponies, would you like to eat me with gravy of cranberry... sauce... WHAAAAAAT?!"
Discord smirked as he rubbed lingering manual-altering magic from his talons.
Spike chose cranberry sauce. It got grimdark from there...
Or 'morose', for those with plentiful vocabularistics! 
My god, someone who actually understands this...
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One that did the "responsible Discord is still Discord" thing quite well that wasn't on that bookshelf: Transdementia, story six in the Petriculture Cycle.
Knowledge of the previous stories is helpful (and they're enjoyable reading too), but Transdementia should still stand decently on its own.
Enjoy!
Oh my, you so write Discord on point! Loving this and anxious for more.
This should probably be
Quite liking the story so far. You write an excellent Discord.
This is sooo good. I need more.
It seems that Discord is able to adapt decently to using mundane jokes. Now I wonder what will happen next. What will the cult look like? More of a Scientology cult, or more of Cthulhu cult? Or like Discord mentioned, possibly just an alternative medicine style of scam. If they see any tomes wrapped in unidentified leather, titled Necronomicon, I hope they book it out of there. Because, all the nopes.
Well this is shaping to be an interesting story so far, the premise of a non-draconequine sanctioned church of Discord is interesting. I always like Discord as one of the mane protagonists, not so much that 'he is so powerful' par but because he knows how to get what he wants with the sheer power of his charms and charisma that he exuded from him and having a constantly befuddled/frustrated Twilight along for the ride only adds to the fun of the ride. I loved the Farscape reference in the LARP scene, I just wished there was a crossover with the two appearing together. I will be looking forward to see the next chapter when it comes up, good luck.
Discord seems surprisingly patient. I would have expected him to slip up by now and do something big and loud and flashy, but I guess he can refrain from showing off and stick to the lower-scale stuff like how he expertly trolled Twilight and Spike with the identities he announced out loud for them. That said, he's obviously still acting out, given some of his more obnoxious moments.
And yes, the cotton candy and chocolate rainclouds! I've only written Discord a couple of times, but I like to keep him spontaneous and free-wheeling, never repeating the same antic twice.
Discord watches game theory? I don't put it past him.