MLP Equestria girls/ Suicide Squad by mobian x
Co-author- Rainboomsrock
Proofreader/Editor-TheGingerWitch
I watched the movie and loved it maybe they could be turned into teens go to Canterlot high and meet the main six. Things get chaotic, and a lot more when they go to the Everfree for a field trip, and the enchantress and her brother are released and start turning the Everfree into a nightmare. Its up to the squad to save the day. Will mister J make an entrance.
I'm thinking kind of make it like the movie where they are in juvenile prison. Sunset shimmer is given a chance to try show them the friendship, approved by principle Celestia and luna. Rick flag and Amanda waller are replaced Moon dancer and flash sentry.
Takes place during the up coming fourth EQG movie.
Suicide Squad/ DC
MLP Equestria Girls/Hasbro
Uhhhh... I don't think this even counts as fan fiction. You took dialogue directly from the movie. I'm sorry but I'll be downvoting this.
?????
Thank you for your thoughts, but hope you continue reading this story. Because this is a lot more to this then dialogue.
The description alone is a jumbled mess; I can only imagine what the story is like.
PS. You don't need a human tag if you have the EG tag.
I'm new at this so please cut me some slack.
7545101
New or not, you shouldn't be stealing lines directly from something else. If nothing else it shows you don't have the creativity nessecary to write an engaging story. Your second chapter is pretty much ripped directly from the movie
Dude, show some creativity.
I've read a lot of fics with dialogue from movies and shows. I didn't steal anything this is what I visioned for my story. It is just the beginning just wait till more chapters come.
If no one has anything nice to say then don't post anything at all.
Thank you.
7546221
Yeah, how about no?
Writing isn't about positive feel goody whatever. No matter how good of a writer you are there is always room for improvement.
Always
If you restrict yourself to nothing but positive reviews you are doing yourself a disfavor.
Inb4 this is taken down due to plagiarism and you're possibly banned
Just in case
Guys please. Stop attackong her please. She's new at this and has passed this idea by me. She has some awesome ideas in store. If you don't like it don't read or. Don't go attackong Her because you have a problem withe he story. It's pretty clear she didn't exactly copy or the story never would have past.
7544348 I am sorry everyone! I was just trying to write a story. I didn't mean to plagiarize. Please forgive me this is my first time doing this. Please give my story a chance I am not a good writer I never thought I was, I was trying to something that I have had on my mind since I saw the movie and put it on paper. I try asking for help and as you can see people make mistakes. So again I'm sorry and I'm fixing it.
P.s I'm a guy not a girl if anyone got confused by that other comment.
7546445 I am sorry everyone! I was just trying to write a story. I didn't mean to plagiarize. Please forgive me this is my first time doing this. Please give my story a chance I am not a good writer I never thought I was, I was trying to something that I have had on my mind since I saw the movie and put it on paper. I try asking for help and as you can see people make mistakes. So again I'm sorry and I'm fixing it.
P.s I'm a guy not a girl if anyone got confused by that other comment.
If there are mistakes please let me know and I will do what I can to fix it. I would like some help in the corrections that may need made, please and thank you. And Enjoy!
I liek to see Dead Shot put that guard inhis place. Not kill him that be toof ar, but maybe shooting his knees and making him crawl and lick hsi booths before getting hsi teeth kicked in is fine.
thing is has to be a good reason he does that.
Okay, mate, I won't put you a negative, but you will have to read a mean critique in exchange:
PUT SOME EFFORT!
I mean, even the tittle is lazy, the description is less than a pitch and the story is so cut, it barely even has space to be told. But then, there's no real story to tell anyways. What is the story here?
I get you have a general concept, but what is the main conflict that the characters have to go through? What is the endgame of this plot? Does it even have a finality?
You need those elements because otherwise, there's no point in telling the story. You have to care. You have to be original.
And again, the name of the game is effort. Work hard for your art, otherwise it won't be more than a distraction.
Also, and this is the golden rule, learn to take a critique. It's not personal and you will probably survive to people pointing out problems with your work. If anything, value more the hard words over the "well done" comments, because the former can actually teach you one or two things about how to write.
7606059 Thank you for the advice.
7606066
Thank me by taking it. Trust me, all of that comes from experience. I was making those same mistakes in my day. Congratulations for making the jump, now learn to swim.
Things seem to have taken a heating up.
when is the next chapter ?
7624738 Almost done.
awesome ps love you ss story :)
MOM'S GONNA FREAK
I plan to continue this when the dvd extended cut comes out. To see more story and character with the Squad.
Stop being cruel. I think this follows with both movies pretty well
7547264
Don't worry, Mobian; I'm reading it right now, and have every intent to see it through to the end. I understand their complaints, but I also see that you're very new at this, being a brand new writer myself. If I could offer any advice, be a little bit more descriptive. In this chapter, half of the lines felt like these characters were meant to be kept a secret, then you reveal their names a few lines later.
Don't worry, you've got the potential for a great story here, which I pray to see run its full course. Write on, Mobian; write on.