• Member Since 16th May, 2015
  • offline last seen August 12th

Lise


If you happen to cry, I will be there. If you happen to smile, will you do the same for me?

T

FemAnon never expected to get a second chance at life, dreams, and love. Now she is in Equestria, ready to go on a date. There's just one catch: she has agreed to share her free will with Discord, who only sees it fitting that he should guide her actions, as well as select her potential love interest.

Warning! Contains body control and suggestive topics of sexual nature.

Written because of a bet with Flutterpriest.

Special thanks to Trithtale, mikesnipe and Enigmatic Otaku, for editing and advice.

Chapters (1)
Join our Patreon to remove these adverts!
Comments ( 21 )

You should lose more bets. :D

7522717 Oh, really? :P

Colour me amused. Though I'll admit, I haven't really read any Anon fics anymore so the whole 2nd Person thing was a little... disorienting. Still: not nearly as bad as you made it out to be, and I found it to be entertaining at least. Silly.

7522841 :) Thanks, fourths! The 2nd person was part of the bet :(

Great job Lise! :D This was so good I'm kind of glad you lost the bet otherwise I would never have gotten to read it.

7523711 Custos! :))) Thanks. :D can't say it was easy writing, though... And a bit out of my comfort zone.

It is outside of your usual fair but its nice to get outside one's comfort zone every once in a while. Besides you did really well with it!

Pfffffft. Nice.

7523866 :) It's the wings, right? :P

Always the wings. I'm also moving into my own place finally on the 1st so hoping that opens up some possibilities for me.

A second person fic... that I was able to read while sober... without the overwhelming urge to :facehoof:. Neat little loophole you found with Discord.

Fantastic. I've never seen an Anon story written this way. Great job! :D

7523981 Nice! :) Looking forward to that voice channel :D

7524119 :) Thanks! :D I like finding loopholes in prompts... O:)

7524427 Well, if it isn't the voice of iiiivel! :P
Thanks, Priest :) We'll see who wins next time :) This definitely was a new experience :)

FemAnon

GASP! A female anonymous leading character!

7527485 :) Thought it would be nice

While I have no idea what the bet was, if this story is the result, I'm glad you lost. ;P It was really fun. You're right about the scary tags, second person and anon (I don't mind human), but you fixed them with the best remedy there is: Discord! Lol, seriously though, this was a very clever way of working around those conditions. The anon thing tends to bother me because the only thing anonymous about them is there name. Here though, you presented a reason, while still giving the character developement. And the second person works because it is more two beings conversing in her mind than "my" thoughts. I strangely tend to find it harder to relate to the main character in 2nd person stories than 1st or 3rd person.

I could also see this style working for a longer story, which is unique for what it is. I think you wrapped it up nicely, though. All in all, it was very enjoyable to read. Just wish I had time to comment on it when I initially read it.

Some things I caught (I did a search to make sure they weren't fixed already):

You poke your head out if the cloud-shower searching for a bar of soap when you suddenly are eye-to-eye with an extremely surprised grey mare wearing a purple bowtie.

"of"

Why should be ashamed just 'cause a horse with a posh accent asked a perfectly reasonable question?

"should I be"

The sound of a dozen shattering classes makes you turn around.

I imagine you meant "glasses", though the thought of social-economic classes shattering at her putting food in her hair is a funny one.

Flash stands goes to you, placing a gentle wing over your shoulders.

"stands and goes" You could add "over" after goes, but I don't know that it's needed.

7537362 :) It was a sneaky way out, I admit O:) Still, the better winner was okay with it, so it cake to life :D

Thanks for finding the sneaky mistakes! (I blame discord :P) All fixed now :D

I see what you did there with Octavia. I'm really glad I have this a shot. Well done, Lise

Login or register to comment
Join our Patreon to remove these adverts!