• Member Since 9th Jun, 2012
  • offline last seen 1 hour ago

ApexSixtail


Just another hack with strange ideas for those poor little ponies.

T
Source

After Twilight Sparkle quickly leaves for Canterlot one morning to see her family, the rest of the mane 6 get concerned and follow her, only to discover that the purple unicorn has a very big secret she is hiding.

Special thanks to Mudslinger077 for supplying the cover image

Chapters (8)
Comments ( 115 )

Good story so far, even though I'm PRETTY sure I already know what happened to twi :pinkiecrazy:
Nevertheless, though, good story.
I will track, and I will watch for more chapters :3

~Rosalynn~:yay:

Nice story and as my forecommenter said, obvious plot is obvious :ajsmug:
Comb out some minor bugs and tense discrepancies and she'll be perfect :yay:

started reading this on fanfiction, glad to see it here.

plot is a bit obvious there. i don't mean to be a grammer nazi :twilightblush: but i think it's spelled pinkie not pinky

Like we have all said, plot is obvious. Will watch for future chapters.:heart:

I can say this a million times over, more of a TwiDash Ship fan, but this is just as good.
moody....almost gives it away (Sarcastic much?) XD

EDIT: Maybe a little more room between paragraphs and speech. kind of a wall of text.

Not bad. I'll keep an eye on this to see where it goes. Also, like Zethariel said, just a couple of places where you switch between past and present tense. Ie, Applejack said as she rubs a slight bump [...], and a few spots where a new character begins speaking, but you don't start a new paragraph. Ie, Applejack quickly placed a hoof on her head to get her to calm down. "Whoa, simmer down there sugar cube. [...]
I know I sound like a grammar nazi and whatever, but those little things can really mess with reader immersion once they start to notice, like when someone is giving a speech and you try to count how many times they say "uh" or "um".
Nitpicks aside, your writing is solid, by which I mean your character portrayals and scene setups are spot on and interesting. Keep working at it, I'll keep reading.

Like everyone else seems to be saying I'll being tracking this for future chapters, don't disappoint me. :duck:

Everypony seems to think the plot is obvious; I'd like to go on record stating that the most obvious answer isn't necessarily the correct answer...but yeah, I think Twilight's got a foal back in Canterlot too.

Oh My Celestia!!! Twilight has an evil fat twin!:pinkiegasp: Or my better second guess as with everyone, a secret family. But I am more interested in how the group will take it:ajsmug:

i liked it, looking forward to more.

Oh, SNAP! The stupidity has been grossed! I mean doubled! XD

Oh this is about to get good.

Twilight: "What are you all doing here in Canterlot?!" :twilightangry2:

The others: "Um?" :applejackunsure: :fluttershyouch: :pinkiegasp: :rainbowhuh: :raritycry:

Is it just me or does it seem like Twilight's secret starting to look darker?

Twilight had a foal!

sorry, I had to say that!

:facehoof::twilightsmile:

Isn't it a bit rude to be invading another pony's privacy? :trixieshiftright:

The plot thickens...

And I'm really curious now. Just what is Twilight hiding? :rainbowhuh::twilightblush:

868327 She met a stallion got fat and moody then whent away came back not fat and happy im guessing she was pregnant

Hmmmm.......what's twilight hiding? This is getting quite suspicious.

Soon, readers, soon "the shit will hit the fan." XD
"DRAAAMMMAAAA!"
and my favorite: "Dun-dun-Duuun!"

So Twilight has managed to make a Pinkie Promise without Pinkie Pie finding out, either Pinkie Pie can't warp reality as much she appears to do or it only works if you actually repeat the motions or say the line "Losing a friend's trust is the fastest way to lose a friend.". :twilightsmile: :pinkiecrazy:

Got pregnant young, relationship probably went south, or there was some sort of issue. Had the kid but her parents are raising it, but she comes back occasionally. Foal would be around 4 or so at this point, so who knows what that means, or if the kid knows Twilight is the mother. I expect the parents are raising Twilight's foal as their own, more so if Twilight was young enough.

OK I'm gonna take a guess...twilight....has.....aaaaaaaaaaaaaa...grandson!

Twilight Sparkle had a child. Why do you think we are reading this? Awesome update.:heart::heart::yay:

I cant wait to read what twilights kid looks like.

The plot thickens. I wonder who this Twinkle Star is.

Twinkle Star is Twilight Sparkles daughter!

:twilightsmile:

Dang it I must know who twinkle star is

914382

Though, never let it be said that an author can't throw a curve ball. The evidence points to Twinkle Star and/or Star Shine to be Twilight's foal. Daughter or Son is yet undetermined. If they aren't twins, then it's possible the names are screwed around, or the other name is the father?

the way things look right now, I get the feeling Twinkle star is Twilights foal.

Yes, Authors can and often do throw curve balls. I could be wrong.

I wonder if Starshine and Twinkle Star are Twilights foals? The author will tell us soon.

:twilightsmile:

914325 You are talking as if there was any possibility of Twinkle not being Twilight's filly.

:pinkiegasp::pinkiegasp::pinkiegasp:

I knew something was up with that filly! So... who's the father?

Twilight is Twinkle Star's mother?

Not big surprise.

942644>>942683>>942747 Why is everyone asking who's the father or assuming Twinkle is Twilight's maternal daughter? Twinkle Star could be adopted for all we know. Or she could be Twilight's niece or young cousin or something.

That said, hurry up and update. I want to know if Twinkle Star's a blood relative or adopted relative. :twilightsmile:

942802
I would suggest rereading the first chapter, as there is a fairly good reason for the guesses there.

Wah wah waaaah?!:pinkiegasp:

TWILIGHT YOUS GOTS SOME SPLAINING TO DO!

DAWWWWW that last part was adorable!

943069 I sense a ponyfied Maury show coming

Woo! Loving it! Can't wait for the next part!
Please keep writing, I'll keep reading!

And so the last horseshoe falls. Now the secret's out. All that's left is the reactions.

943051 Doesn't make it true though. There's always a chance.

943069 Even though that's not the way everypony says explaning. :twilightsheepish:

Also Applejack used to wet the bed until she was 8, oh man she better hope Pinkie Pie and Twilight never blurt that out to Rainbow Dash or else Rainbow Dash will never let her live it down. :rainbowlaugh:

Wonderful story. An obvious plot but pulled off nicely. Keep up the good work. :twilightblush::fluttershyouch::heart:

942802

Why is everyone asking who's the father or assuming Twinkle is Twilight's maternal daughter?

Yes. After all, there's more than one fic where Twi is a father instead. Magic is involved.

'Adopted' seriously, the entire premise of this fic is that Twilight secretly had a kid, that much was obvious since like the second chapter.

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