What looks white when it's glad, red when it's sad and transparent when scared; sleeps through the night yet hides from the sun, won't give its name but pretends it's a bee and enjoys rollerskating?
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Ahuizotl has locked Daring Do in thirty-seven unique death traps.
Twenty-five of them she escaped from without help; the other twelve Ahuizotl turned off when her vital signs reached dangerous levels. Once he resuscitated her after she nearly drowned. Twice he set her broken bones and nursed her back to health before swearing to destroy her the next time they met.
His reasons are very simple.
Picture by ShadOBabe
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I chased each other through the forest near our home,
At first Ahuizotl was meant to simply a replacement
1. We.
2. At first Ahuizotl was simply meant to be a replacement.
This story itself implies many things to which I won't spoil for others but I will say that the possibilities it's paved for both the future and the past of the characters holds solid reason with no room for doubt. It also works as a one shot, prologue or even a prequel.
Where did you get the picture?
Im sensing fluttercord here am i wrong?
7514680
Link is in the description.
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Obsessive stalkers don't see themselves as an obsessive stalkers. They just see themselves as in love.
Daring's younger brother is in love with Fluttershy and will do whatever is necessary to make her realize she's in love with him too.
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That gave me no answer so thanks
7514809
Discord does not come into this at all.
This gave me the chills...
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Splendid!
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I'm so confused.
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Any specific questions?
7626144 I'm mainly confused that Ahuizotl seems to just be a side character when from the description the story had me thinking it was going to be from his perspective. And the ending with fluttershy for some reason makes me think that the narrator was Discord which of course makes no sense. I guess it's just mainly that Ahuizotl is down graded to a dog when I though the story was going to be more about him and not about Daring Do and this unknown OC.
7626421
This story was from Ahuizotl's perspective.
This is something of a prologue to a larger story I might write someday; but for now know that after Daring's brother reclaims Ahuizotl they are pretty much the same character. Daring's brother is an extremely bad stutterer which he hates about himself, so he has Ahuizotl follow him around to talk for him. He can see through Ahuizotl's eyes, hear through his ears, often rides Ahuizotl and uses Ahuizotl's hand like it was his own; so the impression that Daring's brother was speaking through Ahuizotl or having the two characters seem like one was very much intentional.
You're not the first person to think Discord was a important here and I have no idea where that idea comes from. All my stories share a common cannon that splits at the changeling invasion so Discord barely features in my stories at all.
7627896 this information could have been better delivered in the story itself. A new comer to your stories could be lost when you try to pretty much merge a canon character with an OC without introducing them to the new character and the situation better. If you do create a longer story with this primious I would suggest introducing your readers to the narrator so that we can get to know him as his own character and not just something Ahuizotl is attached to, I don't think he was even given a name in this story, a personality yes, be slight and on the egotistical side, but no name.
I would also rework the summary a bit seeing as it's kind of misleading on what the current story is, I'm aware this summary might better fit with the longer story but seeing as this story is labeled as "completed" the summary should reflect what is here currently.
Finally this is kind of a personal dislike, but choseing to turn Ahuizotl into nothing more than a Frankenstein pet is kind of bugging me. Mainly because I enjoy those villains from cheesey adventure movies that Ahuizotl reminds me of. And to have him down graded is a big let down for me personally.
7627896
what role does fluttershy play in this tho
like
she's never mentioned by name
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Generally speaking, if someone murdered the last person they were obsessed with, you don't want to be their new infatuation.
You can has review!
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Thank you
Spoiler
Ugly
Where's the Daring version?