• Member Since 10th Apr, 2015
  • offline last seen Yesterday

Caffeinated Pinkie

"Caffeine and sleep deprivation do a good story make."


Twilight decided to read a book. She reads many books, but this one was special. It was a special book that she read. And what it tells her is quite a surprise to exactly no one but her. It's up to Spike, Thorax, and Pinkie to help her through these difficult times.

Of course, if she was better at listening, none of this would have ever happened and I could have saved about 2,000 words.

I honestly hate the kind of stories where all of Twilight's friends die.
Proofread by:
ShadoWind and SandwichHunter0 A.K.A theassassin.

A submission for the late F*** This Prompt #13.

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 28 )


FUNNY!!! :rainbowlaugh:

Huh. That was actually kind of fun.

Although, I think you missed a bit of potential comedy-with Rainbow supposedly living the longest in Twilight's eyes, it would have been funnier for her to crash through the window and snap her neck, prompting a horrified response from Twilight and nonchalance from everyone else before Spike mentions the Tree of Harmony keeping them alive and then Rainbow getting back up.

7512226 Aw, dang it! That's a fantastic idea. Wish I thought of that.

Welp, glad you enjoyed!

Yay. *giggles* There's my cheer.


I was confused for a bit until I remembered the author's note. :rainbowlaugh:

:facehoof: she didnt think shes immortal after falling into boiling acid?

7513575 Well, she did get pretty bad heartburn.

I honestly hate the kind of stories where all of Twilight's friends die.



Where did they hide the like button again!?! Oh there it is, silly like button always hiding :twilightsmile:

Come here like button.


7513713 I finally caught the like button

7513518 We've done our job of confusing you then. *giggles*

So you hate stories where Twilight's friends die?, yeah i agree with you there, but i do love parody stories of that like this one, you ever read "Who wants to live forever?" by "Ri2", the idea behind it is similar to this but it is done rather differently.

7515815 I'll have to check it out! Thanks for reading.

EDIT: Just realized we both used the same based image for the cover. :pinkiegasp:

Wait, when you say everypony connected to the elements, does that mean only the elements or all their friends and family too? just a touch confused there. If not the latter, then don't tell Twilight. All her family and other friends would still die before her. And don't forget about the other element's friends and family.
The plus side is: having the same friends for all eternity and not worrying about them dying. The downside is having to be with the same people for all eternity.

7516764 What I meant is that since the Mane6 wield the Elements, the tree keeps them alive. It was sort of supposed to darkly imply that when the Elements are placed back in the tree, the Mane6 become mortal since they are no longer connected by them.

Honestly, I was on drugs when I wrote this, so the time it takes place in was all over the place. The beginning is shortly after The Times They Are a Changeling and the flashback is right after the season 3 finale. The rest, though, takes place in some weird limbo before the elements are put in the tree, but after the Mane6 know about it and Thorax is there. The last part is also the section of the story I wrote on drugs. I suppose the story, as a whole, is taking place after The Times They Are a Changeling, but noone realizes that the Mane5 are no longer immortal and they will die.

Sorry for the overcomplicated explanation for a simple question, but in my mind, only the Mane6 are immortal except Twilight might be the only one. :twilightblush:

Well, won't that be a pleasant surprise for Twilight. Now that you've explained it, it becomes darkly humorous.

7516160 I hope you enjoy it i know i did, and your welcome.

Yeah it was one of the reason't i noticed this story really was the cover picture.

....Juggling too many apples. Core idea is pretty funny. Just stick to one MAIN joke at first for these kinda fics.

This is a Twilight's Reviews review.

This story was pretty funny and random, it gave me a good laugh! I love how you wrote the beginning part where Twilight and Thorax were having a conversation. Also, I couldn't spot any grammar mistakes in your writing, so that's pretty good. But the thing that confused me was that Twilight was making negative comments about a book, and she loved books, especially the very long, thick kinds. For a random one-shot, this is pretty good!

Even if Twilight's friends will die, Pinkie Pie will not. She defies all logic and sense. If anything, her ghost will haunt Twilight so much that Twilight will WISH she were dead. That Pinkie Pie. :pinkiecrazy:

“AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH—” The perturbingly pink premiere party pony prominently present in Ponyville was cut off by the ever well-timed hoof of the one and only Twilight Sparkle, the same town’s prestigious librarian who everybody probably hates.

The alliteration, dude...it killed me.:pinkiegasp::rainbowlaugh:

Twilight’s crying intensified and a cascade of tears poured onto the floor. “First Applejack is going to die because she doesn’t believe in medicine or doctors and one day she’s going to catch a cold and DIE! And then Fluttershy will die next because the cardiologist said she has atrial palpitations which she takes medication for, but her generalized anxiety just makes it worse and one day she’s going to have a heart attack! And then Pinkie is going to die because— well, actually, Pinkie is an anomaly in pretty much every sense of the word, so I couldn’t say for sure. But Rarity will die next because she doesn’t eat enough and has an dangerously low level of fat so her heart is pretty susceptible, plus she isn’t very physically fit and she puts herself in a lot of stressful situations. And against most expectations, Rainbow Dash will probably live the longest because she is really physically fit and her heart is much stronger than Fluttershy’s. She also is the only one besides Rarity who pays for health insurance and she has enough money to afford to treat her injuries as recommended by professionals. Despite her tendency to get injured at basically every opportunity she can, she will probably be able to live for the longest.”

Rainbow Dash as the longest survivor??? After all her crashes and reckless behaviour???


.....No. I doubt it. I seriously doubt it....

Great story! I loved it!!!!

Pinkie giggled. “Well, duh! You don’t remember her telling us that? I already planned so many birthday for all of us!”

many birthday. such planned. very surprise. wow


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