1. His Name Is Mud
His Name is Mud
Mud. His name might as well have been mud, due to the amount of mud squishing along his coat and across his hooves, each of which held enough of the sticky, cold, pestilent substance to fill a windowbox full of flowers and have enough leftover to track across the clean carpet, if he could find anywhere not filled with mud within a few days trudge from here. A cold drizzle just on the wrong side of sleet had been falling for days, soaking what could only laughingly be called a road and making it more into a sluggish riverbed that he had been mired in for what seemed like forever. Taking a well-needed break from his muddy slog, he heaved himself up onto a grassy ledge that paralleled the road and let the mud drip back down into the gooey road while shivering in the cold.
If he were the pony he looked like, the changeling could stumble into just about any pony town and find refuge for a day or two until the weather was scheduled to clear. Unfortunately, one side effect of the changeling invasion of Canterlot and their subsequent eviction was a certain hesitancy of the ponies to accept and welcome random strangers coming staggering in out of the rainy fall weather without being checked for magical disguises.
Whatever pony had crafted and distributed the changeling detection spell deserved to be slogging through the mud instead of him. There had been a rock concealed under the mud quite some distance ago which had twisted under his ankle, and that throbbing pain had followed along at his side with every step through the roads he had randomly chosen on his flight from the previous town. It was like he was being followed by a dark cloud, filled with misery and ice which just sucked all of the life out of him with every step.
The last bit of warmth he had left went away as the bitter chill of fall weather soaked into his mud-packed tail while he sat on it. There was no real reason to go forward and nothing behind him but a number of towns who had found he was a changeling and chased him away. So he sat. And dripped. And shivered.
After some time, the faint squish and slog of a pony trudging down the road he had just left became barely audible over the sound of the drizzling sleet. It could have been some guard or police pony tracking down the escaping changeling, except the last town he had visited had been several days ago and this sound was mixed with the faint creak and jingle of a wagon. A dry wagon, most likely pulled by some gullible earth pony who could be sweet-talked into giving a poor, wounded pony a ride to the nearest town. He gave a quick check to his disguise, still intact due to the effort it would have taken to drop it and put it back on again in a hurry, then tried to arrange himself into a pose which would look as pathetic as possible to the passing pony.
It seemed to take forever before the dripping wagon appeared out of the icy mist, moving at a pace which could have easily been passed by a snail in good health, if there were any who would be out in this weather. The pony pulling the wagon slogged and squished along with the slow and regular tread of somepony who knew just exactly how heavy the wagon was and how long they had been pulling it. Step by step, the wagon grew nearer and the changeling double-checked his disguise before extending his aching ankle and letting out a low groan of pain, which was remarkably easy to do.
The pony pulling the wagon had a large floppy hat draped across its head much like a melting pancake, as well as a cloak which the wagon harness was resting on, both of which were most likely a forlorn attempt to provide some protection from the rain. It seemed to be working as well as the changeling’s own disguise because either of them could have been dropped into a muddy pond and emerged dryer than they were now. He groaned again once the wagon grew closer, keeping his eyes nearly closed in anticipation of the expected burst of sympathy when he was finally spotted, because even miserable wet ponies preferred company.
Then he groaned again, louder this time when the wagon drew up next to his theatrical resting spot.
There was no burst of sympathy for him to feed on. The wagon did not stop.
He opened his eyes to look at the back of the wagon as it passed and felt a little burst of anger rise up in his chest at the inequanity of the thoughtless wagon driver. Lunging out into the mud again, he slogged relentlessly forward until he squished down the road alongside the heartless pony, fixing the blue meanie with his best fierce glare and a sharp word.
“Hey!”
The mud-covered pony did not stop. In fact, she seemed to pick up her pace ever so slightly.
“Hey!” he repeated. “I’m talking to you!”
That earned him a sideways glance and a frown, but no words.
“Didn’t you see me back there!” he shouted as he limped along. “You remember, just back over there! I was the pony sitting by the side of the road with a sprained ankle!”
That got him a word. “So?”
“So?!” The changeling tried to stomp his hooves, but succeeded in nothing more than making more squishing noises in the mud. “What kind of pony just leaves a wounded pony by the roadside?” he huffed.
“The kind who doesn’t want to pick up a parasite,” replied the wagon driver without a single change of pace in her emotionless trudge.
Deciding on Righteous Indignation for a response, the changeling let out a loud, “What?!”
The pony still kept trudging onward, but the floppy hat over her head glowed green for a long moment with the same pestilent detection spell the changeling had grown to hate over the last few weeks. His own disguise glowed a matching green through the caked-on mud before the pony said, “You’re a changeling. Or didn’t you know that?”
“Of course I knew,” said the changeling. He eyed the dripping woods they were trudging through as well as the road ahead and behind, just in case he needed to make a run for it. Well, a slow trudge through the mud for it. “How did you know?” he asked after they had walked for a while longer and the driver had not made any more responses.
“Changeling detection spell,” said the driver with a spicy touch of bitter spite and snark he could feel and get just the smallest amount of energy from. “They’re all the rage among unicorns lately.”
“No, I mean how did you cast the spell without me seeing it?” After all, the question was irking him.
“Trade secret,” she said, still trudging along.
“Oh.” As an answer, it was remarkably lacking in answer. After a while more of trudging through the icy mud, he asked, “So… Why aren’t you running away while screaming your head off, like all the other ponies have?”
The pony hunched her back and trudged a little faster with her mouth drawn into a tight line and the faint sound of grinding teeth. “That’s a stupid question. If you haven’t noticed, I have a wagon. If I run away screaming, I’ll lose it. Again.”
“Oh.” At least that was an answer, even though it was a dumb reason for doing what she was doing. The wagon appeared to be a mobile residence of some sort, with a door and a sign, along with a great deal of colorful paint which was obscured by splattered mud. What was better, it seemed to be dry while everything around was as wet as it could be without being at the bottom of the ocean. “So why haven’t you just pulled your wagon into a field and gone to sleep instead of pulling it through the mud?”
“Several reasons.” The pony seemed to be both pleased and angry at the question, which made the emotional flow from her very difficult to feed from, but the changeling nodded along while she talked anyway. “One. The road is dangerous. There are changelings wandering around if you haven’t noticed. There are ponies who would like nothing more than to take Trixie’s stuff. There are floods. Lightning strikes, particularly on innocent unicorns who happened to have perhaps accidentally offended a few dozen pegasi at her last performance. Two. Trixie wants nothing more than to get to the next town and take a BATH! Trixie is very cold and has mud where mud has no business being. Three. Due to a rather hasty departure at her last performance, Trixie has no bits, so Trixie will need to perform BEFORE she gets her bath. Four. Nopony will pay to see a muddy unicorn wave her horn around in the rain, so Trixie is doomed to be disappointed in all of her expectations, like always. Does that answer your question?”
“I suppose.” It still felt odd to be trudging down the muddy road with a pony who knew he was a changeling, but the weak trickle of emotions was at least better than what he was getting at the roadside. Still, he was starving hungry and his ankle throbbed with every step, but this pony did not seem to be terrified of him. If there was no way to trick her out of some love, maybe there was something else he could do to get fed.
“You know, I’ve got a few bits,” he started, shaking his head to get some of the accumulated water off and trying not to think about the little flecks of ice he could feel in his mane. “If you could give me a little love, I could pay you. That way you could get a room and a bath at your next town, and be able to perform. My ankle is killing me and I can’t survive for long on what little love I’ve got left, so it would work out best for the both of us. Does that sound good?”
The unicorn slowed to a stop with the wagon squishing to a halt behind them, but the flow of emotions from her cut off abruptly. “What did you say?” she asked very quietly.
“I just said if you give me some love, I’ll give you some bits, and we’ll both—”
The muddy ground seemed to come up and slug him in the face when the unicorn abruptly grabbed him with her magic and slammed him down. She did not stop at the first squishy impact, but then lifted him out of the mud by his tail and swung him down again while screaming.
“How dare you!”
The impact against the cold mud was much more stunning this time.
“What do you think Trixie is?!”
The third trip face-first into the muddy road did nothing for his scrambled thought processes.
“Trixie does not lift her tail for bits!”
He was losing track of the number of times he had been slammed into the mud by now, as well as losing his ability to breathe. Some faint inaudible noises managed to get through the mud packed into his ears when he felt his disguise fail. It did not slow the unicorn’s attempts to repeatedly smash him into the mud, though. If anything, it seemed to give her more of an incentive. The world became more indistinct with every blow, or at least the world that was not composed of chilly mud. That world was all too clear, but after several more impacts, even it slowly faded into darkness.
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First comment reserved for the author. Welcome to a short six-chapter fic about a terrible monster who pretends to be something it isn't while traveling Equestria and deceiving entire towns full of ponies.
But enough about Trixie.
All kidding aside, I've been intrigued with doing a Trixie/Changeling fic for a while, ever since reading The Braggart and the Bug by PointlessGizmo back around 2012 (He's been offline about a year, so darn) Leech's character was portrayed so well that he probably encouraged me to go changeling in my writing with Changelings, Love and Lollipops, Buggy and the Beast, Seven Brides for Seven Changelings, and... well, let me show you an example of his work:
Leech thought he was very good at tunnel digging, even being awarded a medal for it by Queen Chrysalis. Although it was less of a medal, and more of a piece of hive wall roughly chewed into a medal shape with a smiley face drawn on it. And instead of being awarded it, he made it himself. But Leech was sure the Queen would have done the same if she hadn't been so busy.
So pull up a chair and prepare to be amazed as The Great and Powerful Trixie presents her pet feral changeling for your entertainment. (Don't forget to tip.)
This looks promising, and you've written Trixie remarkably well. I got a good laugh out of her misunderstanding of what Mud was willing to pay her for. Plus I like a good comedy, and I could use another changeling story while I wait for the next chapter of Changeling of the Guard.
I'll be following this one.
I like your portrayal of a changeling here. Those two will make a fun pair to read about. That misunderstanding at the end was great. That was definitely not how I expected their first meeting to go.
Yep, I guess that just came out wrong.
Funny. Out of all the insects I've seen changelings compared to, I don't think beatles have ever come up before now.
In any case, this certainly makes for an interesting opening. I look forward to seeing where these two go from here. And, for that matter, how Mud survives the next few minutes.
7489258 Yeah, that's probably not how the changeling thought their first meeting would go too. He needs to trade notes with Pops to see how lucky he is.
I'm still waiting for a changeling to try disguising him/her/itself as Turing Test.
7489276 Ya think?
7489243 It's only fair, I'm following yours
Turning Test staggered around the library, clawing at her throat and making the most peculiar faces as she thudded into bookshelves and tripped over a table. Finally, she landed flat on the floor and seemed to erupt in green fire, revealing a changeling.
"Couldn't breathe!" gasped the changeling. "How do you get any air inside that thing?"
Yeah, this is gonna be a good fic.
Spoiler alert!!!
7489292 They're called beetles.
Beatles is the name of the band.
7489369
And which ones had to confront Blue Meanies?
Alright, this'll be fun! Eagerly looking forward to the next chapter.
7489399 Changelings are well-documented as resenting the use of insect names to refer to their kind, and as for music, they're all massive David Bowie fans, so it is neither a Beatle nor a beetle that is currently having to deal with Trixie.
Huzzah! Story fun to now be had!
7489310 True story: the Applejack arc was originally planned to have a changeling disguise itself as Turing Test to deceive AJ and make her think that Turing had gone haywire and attacked Apple Bloom. There was going to be a big confrontation which revealed that the changeling could only replicate her appearance, but not her imperviousness to pain or her lack of need to breathe, both of which would be used against it. Ultimately, though, since I'd already used a changeling in another arc, I scrapped it. Now I'm not certain a changeling would have the ability to mimic her metal exterior.
Ooooo, this is gonna be good, I can tell.
It'll be interesting to see how the events of the story play out.
The lack of an AU tag would suggest that it would fit in with the current canon, yet this takes place pretty close to the end of A Canterlot Wedding. And given that that's relatively early in the series at this point, there isn't that much leeway with what could result from this.
It may seem like I'm saying that it's a bad thing, and it isn't.
It's just me being kind of over-analytical about this kind of thing.
7489408
He is refering to the Beatles Yellow Submarine animated movie, wherein the Beatles are recruited to rescue the land from an evil force known as the Blue Meanies. Changeling is to Beatles as Trixie is to Blue Meanies.
7490136 I am aware of that. I was going for the Fool's Gambit, wherein I pretend to take someone literally so that I can make a joke that throws them for a loop.
7489692 Actually, given that it takes place right after the royal wedding, it means the author is responsible to reasonably maintain canon up to that point and no further. Things can absolutely deviate from there without the need for an AU tag.
7490154 The way I personally see it is this:
If a story takes place before the current point in the series, and if the events of said story would cause a different chain of events than what happened in the series itself, then the story should get the AU tag.
However, I understand that I'm probably one of the few people who thinks that way. And I have come across two others who use the same kind of logic, so I won't mind it if the same happens here.
I just tend not to think of that other option when I come across stories like this, which is why I made the original comment.
7490327 AU should be devoted to stories in which a major deviation happened that essentially changed the landscape of Equestria as we know it. For example, the new Star Trek reboot, that's an AU. Fallout Equestria, that's AU.
Timing is important. There exist some stories which have been going on for many, many seasons, and people cannot and should not be expected to keep up with canon in it's many changes. I do actually get your point, as deviation is deviation, but all fanfic can be considered a type of AU, whereas the AU tag should be reserved for really major stuff.
7490346 That last sentence is part of the reason one of the other authors I've talked to decided not to put the AU tag on their stories.
I completely understand what you're saying as well. If one went back, and took a look at every story written for the series, and decided to put the AU tag on any that don't fit what happen in the series, including episodes that happen after said story was written, then I think it's safe to say that a good 80% or more would end up having said tag. Some of which are obvious (like stories that involve DT or SS changing their ways, or stories about RD and Gilda reuniting), others in more subtle ways.
It's especially difficult to write stories that would fit in with what's happened in the episodes since A Canterlot Wedding, since that's only at episode 52 vs the 80+ that have come after, so if the auther DOES end up causing deviations from what happens in those 80+ episodes, I won't mind that much.
7490400 Heh. Well, it's especially hard because some of the show writers seem to have little regard for their own series' established canon. (I'm looking at you, Habar.) Could be worse, though. Whovians can and often do go mad trying to make all the canon mesh together.
7490425 Honestly, I think the writers do a pretty good job for the most part. Especially Haber. (I don't feel like spending much time on this, since this is kind of going off on a tangent, but I personally found the season 5 finale and season 6 premiere to be the best of each).
Plus, it's kind of mitigated by the fact that the series itself has a bit of a shifting timeline. It's difficult to put all the episodes into a chronological order, and the best that can be done is creating "anchor episodes" that are definitive beginnings/ends to particular eras.
7490485 Oh, they are fine. I just mean that Haber disregarded established canon about Luna and Celestia being born alicorns. Not terribly important, just a pet peeve of mine.
That's a thing that happens when shows stay around long enough, the writers make things up in their own way rather than adding to the continuity. It's inevitable.
Well, that cover art isn't suggestive in the slightest. I'm going to have to follow this one.
/CRY
REMINDS ME TOO MUCH OF BUG IN THE CITY!
I miss Leech and Trixie misadventures so much~!
/foreverwaitingoncompletion
Nice, will add this to my track list. Gimme some 8k more words, please. Pretty please~?
(100k shouldn't be too hard to type out in a short amount of time, amiright? Ikiddontkillme!)
Fun story, keep at it!
Oh, hey. I remember when you mentioned this idea way back. I was actually wondering when we'll se it.
7490554 Actually, if you pay attention to the line, that's not what was said.
The line was: "The birth of an Alicorn is something Equestria has never seen!"
The wording implies that Luna and Celestia WERE born alicorns, however said births occurred before Equestria existed.
7491118 Oh, I'm right there with you, but he's said in tweets that he doesn't pay attention to canon established by other writers. And that phrase is ambiguous enough that people are convinced it meant that Luna and Celestia ascended.
7491142 To be fair, most people probably don't read the other stuff, and just watch the show, so it doesn't affect that much.
Trixie's just pissed he called her out on it so quickly.
"Very poor choice of words!"
Is this story canon to Buggy and the Beast?
Yeah, social differences...
"I MEANT KINDNESS! A LITTLE KINDNESS!"
7497034 is it possible for you to send a link to the story?
I'm thinking it might also be because Trixie just needs someone she can vent to/at.
7505019 I'm not Rocinante but here's the link you asked for.
It's by the same author as this story.
Buggy and the Beast
"Trixie does not raise her tail for bits."
9234617
Ha!
What can I do ya for?
30 bits?
20?
...10...?
Lol
Those were some amazingly poorly worded words.