• Member Since 14th Sep, 2015
  • offline last seen Last Thursday

Nordryd


I thought you said weast...

Sequels1

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This story is a sequel to The Apple of My Eye


On a really bad day at school, you don't want to talk to anyone. All you want to do is lock yourself in your room for the rest of the day. You're done.

Unfortunately, the world has other plans. You receive a partner project in class, and get partnered with a girl you barely know. She seems nice, but really quiet. You've barely noticed her in class until now. Regardless, after today you want nothing to do with people.

You start working with her, and slowly realize just how nice and sweet she is. And another thing... she's really cute. Could this girl be exactly what you need to start feeling better?


4th installment of the The Cute, the Fluffy, and Romantic

WARNING: May contain lots of fluff


**Featured from August 9-10, 2016 :raritystarry:

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 97 )
Comment posted by Alex456 deleted Aug 9th, 2016

Another great one-shot! Can't wait for the next one!

I dunno what you were worried about, I liked this. Have a chimichanga!:pinkiesmile:

This was really sweet! Don't be so hard on yourself, this story was just as good as the other one-shots. I can't wait for the next one! :pinkiehappy:

I hearby grant you the title of 'Honorary Master of Dungeons!' Wait, that's not right...*Ahem* I mean, the title of 'Honorary Master of One-Shot Romances!' There we go.

Whoa, I thought you'd save Flutters for the finale! I liked this, it was really cute! I didn't find it weak at all :applejackunsure:

Well, this I wasn't expecting, considering your love for Fluttershy and all,:pinkiegasp: but share the love I guess... (Shrugs) Anyways, great story!:scootangel:

Well, considering a good bit of your stories do involve Fluttershy, I guess it would seem a little hard to right something simple with her. But hey I haven't written any yet, so who am I to judge, right? But anyway, I thought it was just fine for a one-shot. :pinkiesmile: Also I found the Copper/Coppermane reference to be pretty cool. Keep it up dude!

I find this pleasing, keep up the great work.

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This was quite nice. You can tell that you have a lot of experience writing Fluttershy.

Daw... Great job on another one. Can't wait to see who's next.:pinkiehappy:

I think this is a very cute one-shot! :twilightsmile:

Don't you ever be so hard on yourself!

No, this wasn't weak. This is something I expect from a second person one-shot.

Good as always, Nord. :yay:

Fluff? What do you mean?

“So… what’s left?” you ask.
“Only six, which you will be assigned by default,” the teacher says. “You two have Lithium, Cesium, Fluorine, Neon, Arsenic, and Copper.”

The fact that each group of 2 studies 6 elements says that there are thirty-four people in the class, however, there should be one element left over.

“Only six, which you will be assigned by default,” the teacher says. “You two have Lithium, Cesium, Fluorine, Neon, Arsenic, and Copper.”

Shout out to the Coppermane easter egg. :twilightsmile:

How could this be weak, it's amazing! This one literally made my day better. Keep up the good work Nordryd :yay:

Another great epic 2nd story :raritywink:
And no it not week my friend

Well, I'm going to be the one that disagrees with the majority here.

This story goes way too quickly for my tastes, and that's coming from a guy who has fallen in love with his girlfriend in relative same time. Why is this the case? Let me give you a realistic perspective on why this relationship seems hyper-unrealistic.

SPOILERS below! Do not read if you do not want to know what's going on in the story!

1. They've only just noticed each other in class. This would have been fine if they noticed each other in a different light, but this is a first time meeting. Yeah, super cute, isn't she? But it just seems unrealistic that he goes from curious, to loving her in two weeks based off very little things.

2. They only dated two weeks, and only saw each other twice, even though they are so close together (per say). A missing detail in this story, by the way. We know they go to the same school, so they could possibly meet up afterwards if the guy really wants to, and you missed several opportunities to have this romance develop. Instead, you selected specific scenes and dumped out the entire reason of nervousness, dealing with love in terms of the "you" perspective, and other major things that come with this whole view of love. You made the "you" seem very nervous at first, but suddenly confident in two weeks with little to no reason? That's hard to believe, unless he's digging her real hard with just these two relatively short interactions, which I'm not essentially buying.

For a bit more perspective, I fell in love with my girlfriend in two weeks because I knew who she was for three years, and if I had asked her out or something, she would've dumped me since I would be seen by her as "extremely young". Not only that, but the distance between us is about two hours relatively, so we don't see each other often. Once a week, for maybe a couple hours if we can manage. Yeah, we fell in love quickly, on the second date, but that's because we knew each other pretty well due to us being "semi-friends" for a couple of years.

Sorry, this story isn't all that bad. You did characterize Fluttershy very well. I could imagine her saying these lines and doing these things to someone she loves, but the time frame and how very little interaction we, the audience, got with her really made those two weeks feel like two hours. That seems like way too quickly to fall in love with someone that you seem to live near.

Don't give up on writing because of this comment, but this is how I feel. You cannot appease everyone.

Keep writing, you have a talent for writing in character. :)

Yay! Featured! (Mature filter on)

Very fluffy indeed. Great story as usual:yay:.

Yeah, not quite as good as the previous entry, but still enjoyable. It's not bad, but-
Perhaps a little too much personal bias for the character here made it a little more difficult? Does feel a bit rushed, and more atypical with what most Fluttershy ship-fics usually entail. However, it's pleasant and easy to read, so it does have that as an advantage. Also, wording is improving, so take that as a plus.

My two suggestions would be to relax and let characters be themselves. You know Fluttershy, and you SHOULD know who your Main Character is. Let them do as they wish and act accordingly.
After that, the ending lines to these stories appear to be mirror copies almost, save for a few word changes. Maybe taking a little more time on the story will help.

Not quite as good, but still- take the Upvote.

This was the cutest Fluttershy story I've ever read in a year!!! :yay:

Don’t be disappointed. You are, aren’t you? I know you are. This is weak.

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Don’t be disappointed. You are, aren’t you? I know you are. This is weak. This is weak compared to the other oneshots in the series, I know. I’m sorry. This was hard, because I’ve already written a lot of Fluttershy romance, and I wasn’t sure what else to do. Oh well, I hope it was alright for what it was. Thanks for reading anyways. :ajsleepy:

Don't sell yourself short. This was an adorable, fluffy little romance oneshot. It was well written, and has helped cheer up at least my day. I'm sure it has someone else's as well.

Compared to your other works, this might be a little bit weaker... but on its own, it's still awesome.

Once again you amaze me Nordryd I enjoyed it seems you put your best effort into it. I'll recommend someone to read these stories...as Always I'll see ya Nordryd try to cheer up k? Bye

7466047

Perhaps a little too much personal bias for the character here made it a little more difficult?

Kind of confused by what you meant by that. Do you mean that because the author has written Fluttershy so much that it affected the story's content, which makes it seem forced? Just clarification is needed on this sentence. I agree with you on the rest of your comment, just the question here in quotes was a little hard for me to understand.

7465487 Oh, so you noticed that too as well?:pinkiegasp:

**Featured on August 9, 2016

Don't do that, please.

7466609 Yeah I did. Nice to see that I'm not alone.

900oz #33 · Aug 9th, 2016 · · 1 ·

incredible! Your 4th featured :pinkiehappy:

7466482 Yes, in a sense. Whether it be trying too hard to make the character JUST RIGHT or waifu issues, the story didn't feel as natural. Wasn't entirely sure myself of its accuracy when I said it, anyway.

7466888 This is weak, I know. I'm going to do better in the next one. I wanted to save the Flutttershy stuff for Coppermane (my OC) so I wasn't exactly sure what to so here, y'know?

Oh well

Weak nothing, this was sweet.

7465919 For real featured right now! :raritystarry:

Okay you say this was weak and not very good but I absolutely love it, not many writers can capture a shy persons personality but you did a really good job. I really liked this story, it was well written and very good. You did a fantastic job so don't think you did bad on this :yay:

7466900 Eh, don't let it drive you up the wall. I've lost count of how many stories I look back on with shame, if I can bear to look at them at all.

"Don't be sorry. Just be better." ~Old adage I got from BCT

7467076 Nice Quote....also "Mistakes Are Like Papers...there's thousands but one of them can be used to create something new...like origami or used to draw" -Anonymous-1972 December 3rd

7467102 Army can be tough, but it's been one of the best character building experiences I've ever had. My DS told me that one and it stuck pretty well.

I couldn't help but notice that 'copper' was an element choice.

God, you're killing me with your adorableness, Fluttershy! That's why she's my second favorite character :yay:

STOP BEATING YOURSELF UP, JAKE!!! Why can't you accept the fact that none of your stories disappoint us?! Beating yourself up every time is just so twisted! I'm not trying to be rude, don't get me wrong. I just don't want you to constantly torture yourself with this. :applecry:

7467461 hmm... funny how is that be :derpyderp1:

I was the complete opposite of disappointed when I read this. I didn't even have that in mind when I finished it! Fluttershy was and still is extremely cute, and you captured that! I do say that it moved a little fast, but other than that I was entranced by the story!

7467166 Respect. Thank You For Putting Your Life First....I'm a Tech Engi....I was also shipped out...don't remember tho that was when I graduated from high school...computers and stuff...know communication, classified information and other stuff never fought in open field or ever fired a gun

7467762 what was your mos? 19D here.

7466991
congratulations dude!

This has been one of the best stories I've read on FIMFiction so far. Keep up the good work?

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