This story is for my brother, who taught me what it means to be myself.
Marble is shy. She's afraid of crowds and is embarrassed by her own voice. But there was always one pony she felt normal around, her sister Pinkie Pie.
Adulthood changes things. It brings people in different directions, and sometimes we lose ties with people we care about, not because we don't like them, but because we get caught up in our lives.
When Marble and Pinkie's birthday comes around, Pinkie throws a huge party with all of the new friends she had made saving the world. Marble can't handle big crowds, so she slips out and walks her family's land. Surprising memories bubble their way to the surface and Marble realizes how far her family has drifted apart.
Can they fix what's been broken?
Art by Luminaura used with permission. Full picture is linked.
Editing and proofreading by the talented talented OkemosBrony!
Marble needs snuggles.
7466390
Snuggles!
Also I appreciate the favorite!!!
7466394 It was well deserved! By the way, is it complete or will there be more? Cause the chapter ends with "The End." but the story says it's incomplete.
7466403
Shoot I didn't change that. No it's done... For now.
You made my eyes sweat.
You came up with an awesome line I'm going to start using:
You have done well with this. Thank you, Semaj.
-Ru
i liked this. you get a follow and a like from me
7466625
You're welcome. It means a lot to know that my story touched you. In life we get so caught up with being realistic. I know that if I had to be practical are realistic all day; I'd lose it.
7466703
I really appreciate that. I'm glad you enjoyed my work!
The Pie Twins - one so sweet, the other shy.
One with blue, the other with purple eyes.
One who lived for excitement, the other who stayed to the side.
One whom moved on, and the other who was left behind.
You have made an excellent piece of work, my friend, and for that, you will get a follow. I just love how you put these two polar opposites together, and how beautifully your words made them shine brighter than they already did.
You, are truly an author.
+1 watch.
7466902
Thank you!!!
I really enjoyed that little poem. you're one heck of a word smith yourself. I may have to post a blog about it or some such. I really appreciate the follow, and I sure hope I don't disappoint! Your support means everything to me.
Here're a few mistakes I found:
I think you meant "to".
You need the capitalize the "s".
You need an apostrophe before the "c"
I don't think you need "me" in there.
You need a space in between. You don't need to capitalize the "s".
Other than that, this story was really good! I love the depth you put in there about real life. It was a sweet little story, great job!
7467470
Thank you so much! I'll go fix those! Also She does not need to be capitalized because of the rules of speech tagging. Otherwise you're right. I'm glad you liked it!
7467573
There's an exclamation mark, so it does need to be capitalized.
7467576 if the speaker asks a question or makes an exclamation, the '?' or '!' doesn't have to be terminal if the sentence carries on after the quote.
Poor Marble
cute