New Proceedings
Best Buy was a stallion of many trades. A blacksmith, a tailor, an author, and even, Celestia forgive him, a lawyer. Of course, none of those panned out well in the end. That or he just didn’t care for them. It mattered from one to the other. What he did excel at though was selling things. Right now, he was a house realtor. A darn fine one, if he had to say so. He did enjoy his job.
But as the unicorn saw his newest client, he started to rethink it entirely. He gulped as he shakily held a clipboard up in his magic. Before him was a rather unsettling earth pony mare. She was rather beautiful in an earthy way. Her body was a bit more lithe then a normal Earth, so he guessed she had a little unicorn pony in her. Still, he was rather hesitant to approach her. Her gear was indeed impressive, but it was her eyes that scared him. It was like she knew a million ways to kill him and she wouldn’t regret a single one.
Her companion was more unnerving on principle. A large griffon wasn’t something he looked forward to meeting. He had hoped he’d go a long life without seeing one of those meat eaters, but here he was, selling a house to one. ‘Oh please don’t eat me. Please don’t eat me.’ He kept thinking to himself.
Currently the three of them were on the very outskirts of the town. Given how sparse Ponyville was these days and the location, it would be easy for him to be killed right then and there and no one hear about it. He gulped, wishing he had the ability to teleport. Sadly, that was a rare skill and few unicorns could cast it. “S-so, do you like it?”
The griffon, who had introduced himself earlier to him as Crowland Tempo, walked up to the house and put a clawed hand on it. He smiled and gave it a good pat, “This’ll be perfect. We’ll take it.”
Best Buy sighed in relief, “Alright, just sign here.” Crowland nodded and walked over, taking the offered clipboard and pen. “So… what are you planning to do around here.”
“Hunting,” the mare responded quickly.
“Relaxing,” Crowland shot her a glare, causing her to flinch. “Just a little bit of relaxing. I’m getting old and this is a good place as any to retire.”
Best Buy inwardly panicked, ‘They’re staying here? Oh no. Oh no. I have to tell somepony!’ He gulped. “Well…. I hope everything works out for the best.” He quickly took the offered clipboard and shakily bowed his head. “Good day.” And then he was gone.
______________________________________________________________________
Once he was out of sight, Crowland smacked a hand upside Suri’s head. “Hunting?”
Suri grumbled as she rubbed the back of her head, “It was the first thing that came to mind, Master. It’s basically what we’re doing anyways.”
“You can’t just say something like that in front of a pony,” Crowland sighed. “I’m a griffon, remember. The last thing I need is the local guard snooping around the place like they usually do.”
Suri bowed her head, “I’m sorry, Master. I won’t do it again.”
Crowland nodded, “Good, now could you go out and get some supplies.”
“Why didn’t we get some earlier?” Suri asked, earning a deadpan stare from Crowland. “Oh right, griffon and the running and screaming part.” She nodded. “I’ll be back soon enough.”
“And don’t do anything stupid,” Crowland said as she started off. The old griffon sighed in agitation. “That mare’s going to be the death of me one day.” He walked inside, carrying his large sacks with him as he went.
_______________________________________________________________
As Trixie’s assistant, Dot’s job was the make sure his charge was well looked after. That meant he had to be there with her all the time. That wasn’t so bad. Sharing a bed was a rather pleasurable experience, but there were drawbacks. She sometimes did take a shot or try and stab him when she was angry, but she never meant them. That and these bloody meetings.
‘For Celestia’s sake, something happen.’ He mentally groaned as he listened to everything going around him. They had been listening to the local Captain of the Militia and the Chief of the law enforcement. Trixie hadn’t let Time Turner get a word in, aside from small questions here or there. Being a changeling, he could sense Turner’s growing resentment. He honestly did understand. Trixie had a way of getting under everyone’s skin.
Cato was taking notes behind us. The little human’s magic was astoundingly good as it helped him memorize and write down everything quickly. Most humans didn’t have magic, so it was lucky ours did. He was attentive as ever. Dot couldn’t help but smile at that. ‘Of course he is, he’s trying to impress mommy Trixie~’ He’d never say that out loud since he liked living too much.
“Trixie think that’s enough,” Trixie held up a hoof. The other ponies went silent. The word of an Inquisitor was a powerful thing after all. One word could stand between life and death. She held out her hoof to take Cato’s papers, which he gave her without a second thought. She nodded and looked them over, “After careful consideration, Trixie have come to the conclusion that Inquisitor Time Turner is not entirely at fault here.”
Time Turner gave a sigh of relief.
“You all suck at your jobs, if Trixie had to plainly put it.” Trixie stated.
Dot rolled his eyes, “‘I’, Trixie. You’re speaking in third person again.” Trixie shot him a glare. ‘She needs to get out of that habit.’
Captain Thunderlane slammed his hooves into the table, “My soldiers have put their lives on the line to save this town. Some of them even paid the full price and died with Celestia’s name on their lips.”
“I am not reprimanding the glorious dead,” Trixie bowed her head in reverence. “They are indeed lucky to have died with our Sun Goddess in mind, taking out the enemies of her Light. However, I take issue with how poorly your ponies were stationed about.”
“We only expected a monster or two at worst,” Thunderlane shot back. “How the bloody Tartarus were we supposed to know about Nightmare Moon coming back? Foalish stories from books written ages ago?”
“I expect better coordination of a senior officer,” Trixie scoffed. “You are a pegasus. It should come naturally.”
Thunderlane snorted in anger and made to speak when he saw, out of the corner of his eye, Inquisitor Time Turner shake his head ever so slightly. He sat back.
“The law enforcement fared no better,” Trixie chuckled. “Though I didn’t expect much there. You were trained to fight off thieves, not traitors. You are excused, Chief Night Watch.” Night Watch snorted in agitation, but said nothing. “Still, your officers will be trained to be up to a better standard soon enough. Mayhaps they may even come to be half as good as Canterlot’s own police force. That is stretching it, but since I am known to create miracles, perhaps it shall be so.”
“Thank you for the kind words,” Night Watch spoke through clenched teeth. The anger coming off everypony would have choked a lesser changeling.
Trixie tittered and shook her head. She shifted through the papers, “Dreadful. SImply dreadful. Sloppy. Yes, we’re getting somewhere.” She turned to look at everyone. “As of now, you are to defer to me before you make any new actions over the coming weeks.”
Inquisitor Time Turner stepped forward, “I know we may have gotten off on the wrong hoof, but I believe that you’re going a little too far here. Each and every one of these ponies have been cleared of heresy and have shown their loyalty to Princess Celestia, may she reign forever.”
“May she reign forever,” Trixie stated with a raised hoof, before smirking. “Ah, but you forget that I am in charge here. It is within an Inquisitor’s power to take the power from those they deem unfit, such as you Inquisitor Time Turner.” She nodded towards Mayor Mare. “And you.”
Mayor Mare’s eyes widened, “What?”
“From this point on, your daughter will be in charge of the town.” Trixie tittered and shook her head condescendingly. “The Great and Powerful Inquisitor Trixie-”
“I,” Dot corrected.
“I was making a point,” Trixie glared at him.
“Well you’re switching from first to third pony again,” Dot responded. “You still haven’t broken that habit. I thought we were making progress, but you’re kind of regressing.”
“This isn’t the time or place for this!” Trixie shouted in his face.
Dot was undeterred as he rolled his eyes, “When is it time for anything with you?” Trixie was seething, her blood boiling. ‘I shouldn’t antagonize her, but that shade of red makes her so cute.’
“Can you not?!!”
“I can,” Dot smirked, causing Trixie to smash her snout against his to get closer and glare right into his eyes. The hate wasn’t as strong as it looked, but even with the discomfort, he could still feel some love in there.
“Can we just get on with this?” Night Watch gruffly stated. He was silenced when a pistol came within a hairsbreadth of his face.
“Trixie-” She used her second gun to point at Dot, who kept his mouth shut. “-Has no time for this. Ponies are going missing. Strange chaos signatures and monsters are appearing and who knows what else could be happening right now. I require your assistance or so help me, I will consider the leadership of this town full of heretics and have you all executed. Do I make myself clear?”
“Crystal,” Thunderlane grunted.
“Good,” Trixie nodded. “I also require a guide.”
“I’ll go,” one stallion, a blue unicorn with a bobby pin cutie mark, held up a hoof. He was dressed in an officer’s uniform.
Night Watch smiled, “Good man, Pokey. Pokey Pierce won’t let you down. He’s new, but he does a damn fine job.”
Pokey Pierce smiled, “Thank you, sir. It would be an honor to aid Inquisitor Trixie in her endeavors.”
Dot narrowed his eyes as he watched Pokey look at Trixie. There was obvious lust underneath his gaze, which pissed the changeling off immensely. ‘Back off, bub.’ Still, even with that, there was something strange about this stallion that he couldn’t rightly place. ‘I’m probably overthinking this…. Say, where’s Twilight and the Princess?’
_________________________________________________________
“...And that’s why you should stand on your head when reciting prayers to Celestia,” Twilight finished explaining to a now seriously agitated High Sun Priestess. A disgruntled Sunset was sitting next to her, desperately trying to focus on her book rather then blast the annoying chaos mage.
“I fail to see how any of that has to do with honoring Celestia,” Bon Bon stated. “I fail to see how any of that has to do with anything! It was all gibberish.”
“But I don’t speak gibberish,” Twilight giggled and jabbed her hoof down her throat. She pulled out a little box and out sprung a giant list. “I speak a lot of stuff and the closest to gibberish is a southern diamond dog clan.”
“I’m from a southern diamond dog clan,” Lya eagerly raised her hoof and shook it with fervor.
Twilight gasped and teleported over, taking the hoof in her own. “You speak Gibberish.”
“I live Gibberish!” Lya exlaimed.
“That explains so much, yet so little.” Sunset remarked. ‘That sums up Twilight ever so nicely.’
“This is amazing!” Twilight squaled and hugged Lyra. “You are my new bestest friend!”
Lyra gasped and hugged her back, “You’re my new bestest friend!”
“No you are.”
“No you are.”
Both Bon Bon and Sunset face-hooved. This was going to be even worse than they imagined.
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Good work on this chapter. Poor Crowland, he's going to be in a world of trouble when Trixie finds out about him. And the bit at the end,
Well, Trixie is a hate sink. Question,can Trixie really have anyone she wants killed for hearsay on her word alone?
7540941 Matters on the place. In most cases, yes. The inquisition has nearly unlimited power, however, given that the town has a High Sun Priestess, she can't order large executions or the like without consulting Bon BOn. In essence, Bon Bon can mitigate Trixie's methods, but Trixie still has free reign. That is, unless Sunset has a say in it.
7540949 So this Equestria has a large number of government officials who have the ability to order at least individuals to be put to death with very little checks to their power?
7540953 Matters on the circumstances, and Celestia is working on it since most of these laws were put up when she had taken a leave of absence of the government a sometime after Nightmare Moon's rebellion. However, yes, she has that sort of power. Of course, Inquisitors are held accountable if it is found that the individuals were innocent or due process wasn't followed through.
7541012 As long as it isn't supposed to be a good thing that the law is still in the books.
Actually, an imperfection like that lends some depth to this place. Nice.
Twilight and Lyra are friends.
Ohhh dear.
I love Trixie's little family. Quite an adorable trio!
7541012
I know comedy is a factor in your verse, but I cannot imagine how Celestia tolerates the mindless praising of her subjects. She seems sensible enough to realize how problematic are fanatic followers, and unlike a certain Emperor she is not a corpse sitting in a throne.
7561029 She doesn't exactly tolerate it and she does do her best to mitigate and control the more 'fanatic' branches of her armies and nation. However, many of these institutions powers and fanatiscm were born in the first three to four centuries after Nightmare Moon's betrayal and Celestia herself was a little unstable and didn't have much interaction with her nation for some time during that period, allowing some laws and such to pass and come to fruitation that she now discourages. She's mitigated it to the point where it's not nearly as harmful as before, but with threats coming up constantly, sometimes they are still needed. She's not happy about it, but given her work has made the world much safer then it was a thousand years ago, she's on her way to downplaying and getting ahold of it soon enough. They still hang on her every word.
I am theorizing what the plot twist might be, but I will save that for when it is reveled
since this has deep 40k roots, i magine it's a lot like the emperor hating religion yet had a fanatical one built around him ayway. Some saw a path to power and took it.
lyra and twilight being friend here tracks since they were the same in the origional verse as well.