The Interview

by BradMayFan

The Job

The Job

OK Pinkie, you can do this. Head up, tie straight, hair neat, let's do this!

"Ms. Pie? We're ready for you." Pinkie rose from her seat and collected her belongings.

Not too fast now, don't want to look desperate. Don't forget to smile!

"If you'd just follow me right through here," said the cyan interviewer.

Strengths: Smiling, partying, kindness, baking.

Pinkie followed through a set of saloon doors into a back room of the bakery. The room, clearly a kitchen by design had been rapidly reassembled for the interviews. A small table sat in the middle of the room, at it waited the second interviewer. The amber pony rose and extended a hoof in greeting. His jacket was wrinkled and faded, probably seeing daylight for the first time in years. Quickly pulled out to give an air of formality to the proceedings. "Good to meet you..." he checked his papers, "...Ms. Pie. Why don't you grab a seat so we can get started." Pinkie plopped down on the floor.

No, no ,no! Not like that! Graceful! GRACEFUL!

"My name is Carrot Cake and you've already met my wife, Cup Cake." Pinkie nodded. "So we're just going to ask you a few questions and then at the end feel free to ask us any questions you might have. Sound good?"

"Sounds peachy to me!"

Good, good. Just the right amount of enthusiasm.

"Alright then," Mr. Cake began, "tell us a little bit about yourself."

"Well I grew up on a rock farm, and it was really, REALLY boring and then one day there was this big BLOOOSH and a huge rainbow went across the sky! I'd never seen anything so amazing it just made me want to PARTY!"

"Ms. Pie."

"-So that night I went out to the barn and in the morning I threw a big party for my whole family!"

"Ms. Pie!"

"Oh. Sorry, 'A little bit.'"

Mrs. Cake asked the next question, "What experience do you have baking."

"Well, every weekend Granny Pie and me would-"

"Excuse me but, Granny Pie?" asked Mr. Cake.

"Oh. That's my Granny," both the cakes nodded, "every weekend we'd bake together. Pies, cakes, cookies, everything!" Both the interviewers took notes down on their pads.
Mrs. Cake asked, "Where did you hear about this opening?"

Rose from Lilly from Junebug from Daisy Jill from Cherilee.

"Friend of a friend of a friend of a friend of a friend. One, two, three, four, five. Yeah, five friends."

"So you'd say friendship is a strength of yours?"

"Oh defiantly, I love to make friends!"

"Tell us some of your other strengths."

"Well this one time I was able to pick up this HUGE rock way out in the far field and carry it all the way back to the barn!"

Mr. Cake cleared his throat, "Do you have any experience in retail?"

"Well this one time I went with my dad to take our rock harvest to market. While he was off talking with some of his friends I got us the deal of the century! I traded the whole wagon load for ten whole cakes! You should have seen my dad's face when I told him about the deal I swung!"

"Riiiiiight," said Mr. Cake not bothering to take notes.

Don't tell them that!

"Don't tell them what?" mumbled Pinkie.

"Excuse me?" asked Mrs. Cake.

"Nothing!" she promptly replied. The two interviewers looked pensively at each other.

Getting back on track, Mr. Cake asked, "How about children? We get a lot of foals and fillies in the shop, we need someone who's comfortable around little ponies."

"Oh I love kids! Playing with them, eating candy with them and telling stories! Like this one time-"

Stop. Now.

"I get along great with kids," she finished.

"OK, just a few more questions. Why is water wet?" asked Mrs. Cake.

"Uhhhhh, because it's water?" There was more scratching on notepads.

"What is eight minus three?"

If there's eight pies and we eat three of them... Five. Five pies left.

"Five pies that we didn't eat." Even more furious scratching.

"Last question," said Mrs. Cake, "In five years where do you see yourself?"

"What? Do you think I have a time machine? Because I don't you know. I don't think those even exist."

The interview team shared a tired glance at each other. Mr. Cake decided to wrap it up, "So that's all of our questions, do you have any questions for us Ms. Pie?"

"Uh yeah, where's your bathroom?"

Mrs. Cake answered, "Up the stairs, second door on the left dearie." Pinkie ran from the room, leaving the doors swinging wildly.

"No way," said Mr. Cake, "She's just too out there." His wife nodded in agreement. As an awkward capstone to the interview the sound of a toilet flushing came through the ceiling. Pinkie entered into the room, and then left it again. Seemingly unaware the Cakes were staring at her in awe, she kept going through the saloon doors and watching them flap back and forth.

"Ahem," Mr. Cake cleared his throat.

"Oh, hello!" she replied.

"Ms. Pie."

"Oh call me Pinkie. All my friends do."

"Pinkie, we'd just like to thank you for taking the time to come out to this interview. But I'm afraid you're just not quiet the pony we're look-"

"Oh Celestia! I almost forgot, here have one of these," she said pulling a wrapped plate of cupcakes from her saddlebag. "I made these this morning. They barely had time to cool before I had to ice them and come here." She took the wrapping off the plate and placed them in the centre of the table. "Please, try them! I made them for you!"

The Cakes shrugged, each grabbing a cupcake. They each took a simultaneous bite expecting the worst. Pinkie watched as both their eyes lit up. Mrs. Cake said with a mouth full of icing, "Ms. Pi-, err, Pinkie, these are amazing! You baked them yourself?"

"Batter, icing and sprinkles!"

"These are the best cupcakes I've ever tasted!" said Mr. Cake. "What's your secret?"

"Well if I told you it wouldn't be a secret now would it?"

Carrot and Cup looked at each other and a exchanged a smile. While Mr. Cake licked his hooves Mrs. Cake said, "We'll be sure to be in contact with you, Pinkie."

"When you need me I'll be ready an hour before that," she replied standing up from the table. She shook each of the interviewers hooves and left once more through the swinging doors.

Party, party, party, party, party.

"I think we'll get used to it," Mr. Cake assured his wife as she cleaned up the crumbs from their impromptu snack. "And besides, with recipes that good maybe we'll have a little more to go around." He pulled his wife away from the sink and hugged her, "With the extra money, maybe we could finally afford to get that thing we've talked about."

"Oh Honeybun." She hugged him back.

Comments

[Airstream]

The thing they wanted, here is a hint:
It Was Babbies.

[Vestasam568]

793825 is that a yogscast reference i smell?

[SuperPinkBrony12]

793825 And in a few years they got their wish.

[SuperChaosKG]

793825

You and I are both named Dave!Yognau(gh)t and we both have the balls!

[Lemma Prism]

"Oh defiantly, I love to make friends!"

It was part of her teenaged years of defiance, no doubt! Parents just couldn't beat solitude in her no matter how hard they tried~