Everyone who knows Rainbow Dash also knows she's a tomboy, and everyone doubts she is interested in boys, or in romance at all.
Should they make a bet on who will stay single all life long, they would probably pick her. Even though a lot of people find her attractive, she just repel everything that could make her look like a "girly girl".
But what if she had a secret crush on somebody? And what if her secret was revealed?
Rated T as a suggestion and a rap reference, actually enjoyable by Everyone (I hope).
Written for August MacDash contest.
Chapters (7)
I enjoyed he pacing and sory of this story. though Pinkie is kind of pushing in on others personal space, which Imo makes her come off as annoying in this. But other then that I 100% love this story.
Thumbs up , fav and followed.
This was a good start. It had some good jokes especially towards the end, but you need to work on grammar. If you can fix the grammar or find an editor to help you this story would improve greatly. Still, I follow this story to see where it goes.
I'm liking this so far. Any you could add Sunset to the tags as she is part of the group?
7410278 LOL, Pinkie Pie is pretty intrusive, besides she didn't mean to do that...
What does 'sory' means?
7410308 I totally agree with you.
7410402 O my, thank you! How could I forgot about my best human?
Poor Rainbow
>enounced Rarity
It pleased me greatly to realize that this is a real verb, with the note 'rare'.
7411656 Sometimes, I use a dictionary
Gonna start reading and gonna start liking
Has Big Mac seen the message yet? If not this iis going to be akward and maybe even heartbreaking misunderstanding.
Oh boyyyyy
This is too complicate. He must think about being a joke or some kind of game from her sister and friends. Or he hasn't watch it because he forgot about it! XD
You know, I could finish the story here simply adding a "SAD" tag under the title
.
7423486 Holy shit. You're a fucking genius, brah.
7423521 Thank you, liked something in particular?
7423527 Well, I was talking about the idea.
It would actually work. I mean... it'd be a very shocking ending.
I'm conflicted, though. I want to see where this amazing story goes.
I dunno. I guess it was a pretty smart idea, so I decided to reply to the comment by saying so. I honestly had no idea that you, the author, had commented that, though. You thought I was talking about the story, even though I was talking about the idea.
Don't let that fool you, though. This story is great.
And since you asked, here's what I like about the story:
-Everything.
-Everything.
-Everything.
Dammit knew it end in tears. Sighs...
also want to know what happen in the research room! Come on!
7419909 Why? Couldn't it be anyway?
7421121 You're probably half right, but why "This is too complicate"?
I wrote bad?
Please tell me.
It's my fault?
Awww please keep going
By this point I'm more curious about what happened in that room than everything else.
Second; nice way to solve everything and then thicking the plot. XD Now we have to see if someonr made a move and if they want help. XD
7427376 This may sound like an odd request but could you be more specific?
As a greenhorn writer I need all the imput I can get and I'm not sure about what you're referring to in your "Second" point...
The reasons why Mac was willing to give her a chance, and their feelings of dissappoinment from she trying to be tough and he unable to talk to the girls and wantimg something serious.
7427471 Also you made easy (too easy) understand RD's character. I did like that.
I have trouble explaining, my cellphone made it difficult. But if you have doubts I will try to.
I feel for both Mac and Rainbow... Its not easy for either character and their respective archetype to open up. Looking forward to more... Maybe a Zephyr scene that drives Rainbow Dash to confess and as she runs Zephyr says to himself my work is done. He turns to the other girls and says something like what, rainbows are soo hard to manage. Well siesta time....
Did you know that you just had got me marterial for AppledashxRainbowDash fics???? Why can I write something without turning it into another thing????
Nice passing, nice the way Rainbow is trying and at the same time not trying to deal with her real feelings. I like the surprised couple, that I'm not sure if it is going to happen or not (not a problem for me) XD. Oh teenage love, so confusing, so cute and I really glad I'm an icr queen, I have better things to do and focus for adding that. XD
Ow, I wanted to see what happend to sunset and the others. What does Flutters says to Mac. What Rainbow told him???
7446913
Uhh, what?
Honestly, what does that mean?
What's and icr?
about what happened to Sunset and the others, you will see I promise. What does Flutters says to Mac isn't that interesting, just that RD is hurted and he should be more caring, since she may could actually like him. And how Rainbow replied...
you'll se in the next chap.
7446637 Both the cliffhanger and the final twist has always been a mile stone of this story, even from starters.
Sometimes, is good to be bad.
You got me with that one.
Still, this can't end well for Dash.
7447229 I mean to say ICE queen. Sorry its hard to type in the cellphone.
Anothet shipping fic that i like :P
Yay!!!
YEAY
I'm really digging this. You're writing is very natural, and all the characters are spot on.
Also, doth I smell a hint of FlutterJack? Not my thing, but I'm too hooked on the story to quit now.
Yeah I should have firgured that Zephyr would be to focused on Rainbow Dash.
Possible AppleShy... FlutterJack... That took me off guard
Would not have done the Pokemon Go reference it will date the story but I get why.
Would have done the Fluttershy talk to Big Mac. But all in all a nice chapter. Looking forward to more.... And I am a MarbleMac/CheerMac shipper...
So I'm guessing Sci Twi got blasted by some harmony magic and got palstered agaist the wall?
Sure Susnet had to keep from laughing her head off.
Or did Sci Twi get blasted into susnet and woudn up face to face.
Heavens, this chapter turned out to be huge. A little too huge maybe...
Do you think that the part when I describe Blitz personality is a little too much?
Honestly I don't know, I kinda wanted to put it in so that you wouldn't misunderstand his way to act but it's long and there's no actual comedy.
I also thought about write it in an extra chapter, but I don't know were I could insert it.
Please share your opinion.
YYYYYYYYEEESSSSSS! Way to go Big MAC!
Oh can be a doubel date Sunset and Sci Twi.
XD
Well timed Big Mac.
BRING THE FLUTTERJACK!
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
THE CLIFF HANGER WHY?
I thought his name was Rainbow Blaze???
I like him, her daughter is like him XD. Do you think he'll ever master the parent thing? Just enough to intimidate Mac??? Jajajaja!!!!
Jajajajajajaja!!!!!! Poor Twilight, she is dense XD she will learn, someday XD
My only gripe is the Kelvin-Celsius joke, but that's because I don't get it... Which I think was the point.... So good use of anti-humor
7467951 So glad someone asked.
You see, when you measure temperature there are different possible standards.
In Europe we're used to adopt Celsius, which has a pretty low scale: The human body has an average of 36 °C.
One other unit of measure is Kelvin, which is similar to Celsius but it starts from absolute 0, so 36°C equals 310 °K.
So in short, when you measure a human body and read 310° on a thermometer you know that usually is way too hot to be Celsius.
There was a nice joke, but you have to be like Twilight or at least Sunset to appreciate it, and even Sunset did barely a laugh.
7467260 Is it?
I mean, by reading fanfics I found a lot of possible names for him (including Blitz) but his name is never specified in the show. There is a canon source which I am not aware of?
Like an interview or a comic? If so please tell me.
As for intimidate Mac, he tried.
7468494 well, the trading cars game named him that, but no. There is nothing official.
I did find it funny (the joke). But I like Kelvin to have the better standout!
Question: what made mac change his mind? About asking her out, I mean.
7468494 yeah I remember that now, but yeah only SciTwi would actually laugh at that joke
Alright Prince Vegeta, for the win as best DBZ character, your final question is this: Pinkie Pie's friend how many names long?
Vegeta: Its over 9000!!!!
Does having a rap reference really necessitate a teen rating?
Dawwww He so torn his little girl is growing up....Maybe...mayeb ti tiemf or him to get back in the dating game.
Sure hsi wife or late wife would understand.
Grammatically and Spelling wise: You could use a betareader/proofreader
Story wise: Nice interrogation of Fluttershy's chat with Big Mac as Big Mac and Rainbow Dash prepare for the date. The 80's like get up for Big Mac would work for a Retro themed date with Cheerilee so good call Apple Bloom. And all the 'At a girl' moments, Blitz is an encouraging dad.
Kid Rainbow Dash was adorable!!!
he is going to follow them isn't he?
Nice call on Applebloom! And Really no one notice Dash acting though school? Wow, she is good!! I wish I be like that, when I see a ghost!
7492835 Usually no, bit since the song was "I like big butts" I preferred not to risk. Besides, I wasn't sure if I was able to keep a story of teenagers in love under PG. I'll may ask to someone more expert about the tags, but I think i'is on the line between E and T here.
7493116 I knooow I need an editor
, what I do not know is where to find one.
. (Unless she's Sweetie Belle
)
Always remember to ask cute little sisters when you have to be fabulous
7493399 Is he going to follow them? I considered it before but: 1 it's too cliche, 2 it's unrealistic, 3 that's not how I developed his character.
Anyway, I would love to stay here and chit-chat
but I have a story to finish.
7493842 Concerning getting a editor, I use two things, another writer here on fimfiction via google docs and I run my work through grammarly... well after I found the site. If you want the former, feel free to PM me
That's it!! this is the best line in the whole fic!
Fine, the end was funny too! happy now?
'Guess who the poor fella was' ... Poor Big Mac, I know he can take a lot but seriously Rainbow needs to reel it in, Big Mac has proven that he can and does underestimate how fragile the world around him can be.
'Eww, straights'... 'Wait what?'....I get the joke, but what if in 'Legend of The Everfree' Sci-Twi turns out to be interested in Flash...
A decent finish to this part of the story, looking forward to more.