Luna versus Wedlock
Progress:
Luna Versus Wedlock
By Andrew J. Talon
Disclaimer: This is a non-profit fan-made work of prose. My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic is the property of Hasbro. Please support the official release.
- - - - - - - -
“You know Sundance, I just realized something,” Hoyden said as he paused in his massage of his marefriend’s hooves. She cracked open an eye and stared at him from the top of the bed. She was exhausted almost beyond belief thanks to the day's events, and even after the universal day off for everypony in Equestria after Discord's rampage she was still more than a little short tempered.
“Mmm... You stopped rubbing my tired, aching hooves?”
Hoyden rolled his eyes indulgently at his marefriend, but he allowed her to get her licks in. It had been a long, long day what with an Evil Chaos God running around and stuff blowing up and his futile attempt to stop him by strapping himself to a rocket.
Actually, viewed from the present it was pretty bucking metal but it was probably best to fully examine those events at a later time. He had more important things to worry about, after all.
“Well, aside from that,” Hoyden said with a chuckle. He gave her a serious look. “You're pregnant.”
Sundance stared at him as though he were an idiot. And really, it was a bit hard to blame him but if she could hold off on the sarcasm for just one-
“Yes, I am Hoyden. Welcome to now, where have you been?”
Too late. Ah well, it was what he loved her for, among other things...
“I mean you're pregnant, but we're not married,” he said. Sundance blinked a few times, then held her hooves to her cheeks.
“Oh... Oh! Oh! You're right... Uh oh. This could look bad, very bad given my position, and the Princess...!” She looked like she was about to rev up into a furious rant, but with long experience Hoyden knew exactly how to head her off at the pass.
“Wait! I just had an idea!” Hoyden said with a grin. His marefriend stared at him coldly.
“I'm not getting married in Los Llamas, Hoyden,” she growled. Hoyden threw up his hooves, smiling cheerfully.
“I have another idea!”
- - - - - - -
A few moments later, Luna was roused from her early morning slumber by the sound of a hoof hitting the door to her room. She sleepily sat up and rolled off the bed, and shook out her hair and wings. She then trotted slowly to the front door, waving her hoof in front of her mouth as she yawned. She opened the door with a brief application of her magic and stared out at the two ponies waiting for her outside.
“Hwah... Yes Sundance? Hoyden? What is it?” She asked in concern, wincing a bit as she stretched her wings. She'd slept on them a bit funny so getting the blood flowing again took some time. “Is something wrong?”
“Something, yes,” Sundance said. “You see, we-”
“Would you marry me?” Hoyden blurted out. Luna’s eyes widened, and the blood that had been tasked with circulating around her wings went to her cheeks instead.
“Buwah?” The millennium-old goddess intelligently asked.
“What,” Sundance growled. Hoyden coughed and shook his head.
“Wait, no, I mean, marry us! As in, us!” Hoyden said, gesturing quickly to himself and Sundance. The blonde mare’s anger faded, and she smiled and nodded at the moon goddess with a blush across her own cheeks. Luna herself blinked and tilted her head quizzically. It was actually very adorable, especially with her mussed mane.
“Both of you?” She asked, as though confused by the request. Sundance tapped her hooves on the wooden floor underneath her a bit nervously.
“Yes, please!” Sundance said with a warm smile. Luna looked thoughtful for a long moment, humming. She even summoned Abacus to do some calculations as Sundance and Hoyden stood there awkwardly. The moon princess gave her loyal mathematics tool a smile, and held him aloft nearby. She at last nodded, cleared her throat, and spread her wings. Her horn shined and magic filled the room. Her aura flared into a beautiful rainbow, and both Sundance and Hoyden gasped at the splendor around them.
“All right, let’s see, how does it go?” She asked aloud. “Oh yes! Ahem. By the power invested in me as Princess Luna, Goddess of the Moon, Arbiter of the Heavens and Queen of the Dreamlands I hereby pronounce you Stallion, Wife... And myself Goddess, so mote it be!”
The stars shined brightly outside the windows, and seemed reflected in the eyes of the two lovers. They smiled warmly at each other, their hooves clasped together. Luna’s hooves rested on theirs, and they turned to smile at Luna. The goddess smiled back, a bit sleepily.
“You may kiss everypony,” she said. She leaned forward and kissed Sundance on the lips, then kissed the surprised Hoyden in turn. She turned and trotted back to bed, the door shutting tightly in front of them.
Both Earth ponies blinked rapidly in confusion. They slowly turned their heads to look at one another.
“... Um... I don't think that's how it was supposed to end,” Hoyden said at last.
“Goddess?! What part does Goddess play in a marriage?!” Sundance growled.
“I note you’re not upset about that kiss,” Hoyden said with a little grin. “And hey, this'll definitely make for an interesting... Honeymoon.”
"... That was the worst pun ever," Sundance said at last.
"Yeah, but you loved it all the same," Hoyden teased. "And as for her being part of it, well, she could just be between us when we-"
He got clobbered for sharing that, but her deep blush as she punched him was worth it.
- - - - - - -
Short, but hopefully satisfying. At least for a little while. My muse is like Luna sometimes: She refuses to show up where its most logical in favor of something else like video games.
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I felt memories of "Luna versus Threesome" welling up while reading this chapter. And that's a good thing.
Short but sweet. And besides, all Progress for this fic is good Progress. (Yes, that pun is atrocious, I know.)
Nice, i missed this.
Oh, yeah! About time we started on the wedding for those two!
So now the two of them are married to Luna? SWEET BUCK YES.
Huh, I notice that officially this is still On Hiatus.
Sweet Celestia and Luna this line:
“Wait! I just had an idea!” Hoyden said with a grin. His marefriend stared at him coldly.
“I'm not getting married in Los Llamas, Hoyden,” she growled. Hoyden threw up his hooves, smiling cheerfully.
“I have another idea!”
Juts made me crack up.
Use The Power Of Videogames, Boredom, Work/Studies, When You Need To Do Something That Will drive You To Boredom, Is When Inspiration Appears, Usually Somewhere Where You Are Far From Writing Instrumentsdl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/Luna_lolface.png
hurray! Can I have cake?
Wait, so are all three married now?
so mote it be? Confusing but I get the gist.
cant wait for the honeywoon
Well, it seems Luna was all for it.
LOL Luna, I think they were meaning for you to marry them. Not the three of you into a group. Silly Luna.
Celestia would have a laughing fit if she watched this occur
Would you marry us?
sure
um I was kinda meaning us two your sorta supposed to be the priest or judge presiding.
Oh, um does that mean we have to get a divorce?
I don't know, we better ask Celestia.....
On the moon..... Great job Luna now what....
Huzzah! The Fun has been tripled!
621312 Yes. Yes they are. I for one can't wait to hear more about their marriage!
Short but Extremely satisfying!
My new goal in life is to get married by Luna
To Luna!
Hooray for threesome marriges!
I wonder what Celly has to say about this
Oh and Hoyden you silly perv
OMG! I can tell just by the names of the chapters that this is going to be SO AWESOME!
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
ALL FIVE OF ME FIND THIS FUNNY!
Maybe they should have waited until later at night, when Luna would have been more... awake.
omagad it updated! IT"S ALIVE! WOOO
*readsreadsreads*
My favorite fanfic updated just as I came back from Barcraft....
Can things go any better?
Don't they need to sign a document?
Short? You bet
Satisfying? More than you can imagine! Why, just look at me reading it:
i921.photobucket.com/albums/ad60/moonlit-sonnet0/Animation%20and%20Comics/My%20Little%20Pony/Frienship%20is%20Magic/Pinkie%20Pie/Popcorn.gif
622657 me and my vodka, love and tolerance beats all, throw vodka and whoever that awesome pony is, Norris is beer in comparison, not even a Budweiser at that my friend
I literally burst out laughing when Luna kissed both of them, I virtually never burst out laughing at a story, very good work and I look forward to seeing what fun shenanigans this will lead to
Reading the comments was almost as entertaining as the actual story itself
So glad to see you working on this again!
well, you know a old man saing: qualety infront of qvantery.
Hilarious, loved this story when I first picked it up months ago (When I was first discovering the wonders of fan fiction in fact.) and I still love it now
Happy to see this still going on!
I can see it now:
"Lu-lu! What is the meaning of this? You know we cannot marry mortals!"
"What did I- oh. That was a... um- uh a... heh?"
And that is why Luna was sent to the moon
Oh god, the end made me laugh hysterically. Do not ask the half-asleep goddess to wed you on the spot, it will not go well.
621171
perhaps, but atrocity does not exclude truth ^_^
absolutely ecstatic seeing new stuffs here
a.deviantart.net/avatars/g/e/georgetakeiplz.jpg?1
I laughed through the entire read and through every comment...
The fun has been tripled!
a.deviantart.net/avatars/l/o/lovestrucklunaplz.png?1
It is midnight, and my household is asleep, and I'm injuring myself horribly trying to keep from collapsing into roaring bouts of laughter.....Short, sweet, to the point, and every damned sentence was a spleen breaker. I'm looking at the emoticons, and the only ones that honestly represents my emotional state at this present time is are
each to 12^12(12 to the 12th power) Damn you Andrew Joshua Talon, damn you to the moon!!
Noted: first official comment on this site, woot!
621326 Actually, that's a fairly common ending for Royal Proclamations, at least it is in Fantasy settings. There's usually a little more to it, like, 'So shall I say, so mote it be.' Basically, 'I said it, so that's how it is, go f
k yourself if you don't like it.'
Hmmm. As I said, I get it. The word mote was what threw me off.
MOAR OR I WILL USE MIND-CONTROL TO FORCE YOU TO. I will track you down and pinpoint a sattelite to take over your mind alone
Awkward misunderstanding leads to equally-awkward three-way relationship? I'm starting to see a pattern here.
I re-read the earlier chapters.
Why isn't Macintosh a character tag yet?
"What do you mean, you only wanted to marry one another?"
626599 Read "Luna vs. The Facts of Life".
Oh my, how did I miss that this finally updated?! I'm so happy to see more progress occur on Progress, but Luna really needs to learn how to treat her new Husband and Wife. She didn't even invite them in so they could all spend the wedding night together.
748957
"pure and virginal"
that what you mean?
751116 Well, that one reveals that after the banishment 'Tia sought comfort in canoodling. And the lineage that would result in both Prince Blueballs and Cadence had to start somewhere, so the "they can't marry mortals" thing just doesn't work.
751130 Celly just wants them all to herself...
Seriously. Be. Afraid.
751190 Nah, she's been trying to get Luna laid.
752357
Or is that just a guise and she really does want equestria for herself?
Celestia x Equestria
billionsome...
752428 It's not. Trust me, read "Luna vs. the Threesome" too - it has been made canon now.
This is the first mlp fanfiction I ever read, and the one that got me hooked on it. Thank you so much for making it, you did an amazing job. Its so my favorite Luna of all the ones I've seen in fiction.
This fanfic is absolutely glorious from start to current. People often forget that this fandom would be a wholly different one without Luna's abacus (which has been immortalized in the EqD pre-reader omnibus).
I hunger for more...