Stealing Knowledge
It was a quiet day in Ponyville. Most of the residents were in fact completely unaware that Princess Celestia had briefly visited their town earlier that day.
And they were also completely unaware of the mischievous scheme being carried out beneath their metaphorical muzzles.
A lone pedestrian passed by an unusually tall, but otherwise inconspicuous bush on the roadside. Once they were suitably far away, the bush suddenly sprang to life and made a mad dash down the road in the opposite direction.
It stopped in front of an enormously wide tree. One with a door leading to the interior.
“Alright, here we are, and nopony suspects a thing!” whispered Discord’s voice from inside the bush. “And the best part is, Twilight Sparkle and her draconic associate are clearly not home! Now then, does everybunny understand what they’re supposed to do?”
There were a series of hushed squeaks.
“Good! Alright, you two stick with me. The rest of you, get going before somepony comes along!”
Suddenly, eight horned rabbits launched out of the bush and hopped away.
“And now my turn,” said Discord with a laugh. He jumped out of the bush.
The bush immediately proceeded to sag to the ground.
Discord took the time to consider the bush before grabbing it and lifting it off of the ground, revealing two more jackalopes.
Discord propped the bush against the side of the tree.
It didn’t sag again, so he simply shrugged and motioned for the two jackalopes to follow.
He moved to the door of Golden Oaks Library, and then started rubbing his hands together.
“And now to take from dear Twilight Sparkle what she values most!” he declared sinisterly. “Knowledge!”
He pushed the door open. It was not locked.
“Thank you for your suggestions, girls,” said Twilight to her friends, all gathered at a table in Sugar Cube Corner. “I’ll definitely be taking your thoughts into consideration. Discord has no choice but to come back to us sooner or later, and a different approach may very well be necessary. I still can’t believe he actually ran away from us...”
“So, you’re completely certain that that ruffian won’t be able to cause any trouble?” asked Rarity doubtfully.
“Not in any significant way,” answered Twilight. “Without his powers, the worst that he can do is say something mean. Or stupid.”
‘Really, really stupid,’ she thought privately.
“Yeah, but he was supposed to be our problem,” said Rainbow Dash. “The princess asked us to take care of him, and now we don’t even know where he is? What are we going to tell her?”
Twilight’s eyes flew wide open.
“We don’t need to tell her anything!” she cried hastily, earning herself looks from her friends.
“We should only resort to that if we have no other choice! Discord will be back tomorrow for sure. Or, the next day at the very latest! We don’t want to throw up the red flag because of every little setback! We don't want to alarm the Princess over nothing! We’ll have him back under control and she’ll never need to know that we had this incident in the first place!”
“Ah hope yer right, Twi,” said Applejack doubtfully. “I reckon that without his magic, the worst that might happen is he’ll make himself out to be a delinquent fool.”
“You don’t think he might hurt somepony, do you?” asked Fluttershy fearfully.
Twilight shook her head.
“Discord may be many bad things, but I just can’t see him doing something like that. At least, not physically. Violence has never been his way.”
Twilight let out a sigh.
“I’ll give him one day. Just one day, to think about all that he has done. After that, if he doesn’t come crawling back on his own accord, we’ll go out and get him ourselves.
“Therefore,” she continued, “I suggest that we all go home now and let off as much of this stress as we can. Just in case we do wind up having to go and get him. We’ll want to be well rested. Let’s all just... just relax and forget about Discord for just one day.”
“Well, alright sugarcube,” answered Applejack. “Just promise that you’ll let us all know the second something happens.”
“Of course,” answered Twilight.
The six friends said their goodbyes, and then one by one exited the bakery, with one exception.
“Goodbye, Twilight,” said Pinkie Pie cheerfully as the last of her friends left.
She watched as the front door closed.
As an afterthought, she ran to it and threw it open and stuck her head out, apparently stretching her neck as she did so.
“And don’t worry!” she cried out after the bookworm. “We’ll have that meanie back here in no time!”
She let the door close again and bounced away.
As she left the dining area and entered the kitchen, she froze in mid-bounce at a most unexpected sight.
Two boxed cakes were making a run for the back door.
She let out an enormous gasp and the cake boxes stopped moving.
Eight jackalopes peered out from under the boxes and gazed at her fearfully.
“What are you cute furry little guys doing?” she cried out. “You can’t just take things that aren’t yours without paying for it!”
Each of the critters’ eyes seemed to enlarge and threaten to fill with tears.
Pinkie’s stern gaze fell apart almost immediately.
“Awww,” she declared, her tone suddenly sympathetic. “It’s okay. You critters must be hungry! I would have let you have them if you had just asked... So, I’ll tell you what. You can have them!
“But only this ONE time!” she finished strictly. “Next time, you have to ask permission first!”
The jackalopes broke out into smiles and jumped toward her hooves, kissing them in thanks.
“Hey! That tickles!” cried Pinkie cheerfully.
Suddenly, the creatures returned to the cake boxes and picked them up again before dashing away through the door.
Their sudden disappearance disappointed the pink mare somewhat.
“I didn’t know that there are jackalopes living in Ponyville...” she said to herself. “I wonder if Fluttershy knows where they came from.”
Rarity sighed in exasperation as she neared her home.
The recent incident truly was causing her an incredible amount of stress.
“Pull yourself together, Rarity,” she muttered to herself. “Now isn’t the time to be worrying about Discord. You’ll just have to worry about him when there is something that you can actually do to help. Now, forget about that ridiculous draconequus and find something to help you relax!”
She finished talking to herself just as she reached the front door to her home.
And then she saw the box.
It was sitting on the ground beside her door. It was about a half a meter wide in every dimension.
There was no packaging information on it.
“What in the world?” she said quietly.
She tried popping the lid open, but found that it was not such an easy task.
On closer inspection, right sides of each of the four flaps were tucked under the left sides of the flaps to their right, keeping the box sealed.
She put some force into her magic, and the box suddenly popped open.
And she gasped at was inside.
Gems.
A huge pile of gems, every color of the rainbow.
Also, there was a note sitting on top of it all.
Rarity was dumbfounded. She could not even begin to fathom who might have sent her a box such as this. Unless it came from Spike... But that seemed somewhat unlikely. He would certainly devour a portion of such a hoard himself. Not to mention, while he might be willing to dig all of this up just for her, he would not have been able to easily find the time to do so, or even know where to look to find them.
‘I suppose the only way to find out what this is about is to read this note,’ she decided.
She picked it up in her magic and brought it in front of her to get a good look at it.
Before she even began to read it, she grimaced. The penmanship of whoever wrote it was, frankly, atrocious.
Which immediately ruled out Spike.
She read the note.
My name is Rhombus. I have recently moved to the town of Ponyville in order to establish a mining enterprise.
I learned from a friend of yours that you have use of these gemstones. I have a business proposition. I will trade the gemstones for supplies that I do not have the ability to otherwise obtain, which will in turn increase my ability to acquire more gemstones.
If you are willing, I require a shovel and pickaxe, a chisel, a kazoo, a couple of lamps, six bottles suitable for storing liquids, and four bungee cords in return for these gemstones in this box. I’ll get them some time tomorrow.
Rarity could barely believe the strange note.
This ‘Rhombus’ pony was basically asking her to do his shopping for him.
‘He must have a good reason for asking this of me,’ Rarity decided. ‘Maybe his job interferes for some reason. Or maybe he’s just doesn’t like to go out in public. And, if nothing else, somepony recommended me to him!’
‘I’d hate to let whoever that pony was down…’
And, if this pony is as good as his word, she could have an exertion-free source of gemstones, and all she would have to do is fetch a few odd items.
Suddenly, Rarity burst out laughing at the absurdity of the proposition.
“As peculiar as this is... why not?” she declared. “I can give this a try. This pony is new in town, after all, and it is a good time to be generous. If it doesn’t work out, it doesn’t work out!”
“Of course, this is far too many gems to pay for the items requested. I’ll be certain to give the stallion a sizable portion of this back. I just can’t accept the whole box!”
“Why, I’ve just thought of a wonderful idea! Why don’t I throw in something special as a surprise! I’ll simply call it a housewarming gift! So, based on what little I know about this stallion, what could that gift be?..."
“Welcome home, Spike!” said Twilight as she opened the door to the Golden Oaks Library.
And then she took a look inside and gasped.
“Spike!” she cried in alarm. “What happened here?”
Spike considered for a moment.
“It looks like somepony came and browsed the library while we were gone,” he decided. “Somepony who didn’t have the decency to clean up afterward.”
He let out a slow sigh.
“But who would do something like this?” cried Twilight, clearly upset. “Everypony knows that the library is closed at night and when I’m away!”
“Well, we don’t exactly lock the doors either,” Spike pointed out.
“What if- what if it was- No, no. That’s absurd.”
Spike gave Twilight a confused look as she shook her head.
“Could you do me a favor, Spike?” she said.
“Of course, whatever you need!”
“Would you please check the check-out index and figure out if there are any books unaccounted for? I need to do something really quick.”
“Sure thing,” he answered. “Shouldn’t take me but a few minutes.”
“Thanks, Spike. You’re a life saver.”
Twilight tried her best to ignore the horrible disorganization of the library and headed upstairs, into her room.
She closed the door behind her and then began rubbing at her eyes with a hoof.
“Oh, goodness,” she sighed. “What a day. I need to relax. Just for a few minutes. And then I’ll go back downstairs and give Spike a-“
Twilight cut off her dialogue as she discovered that her bed was not as she left it.
There was a piece of paper on her pillow.
A chill ran down her spine.
She snatched it up in her magic and discovered that there was extremely badly penned writing on it.
Dearest Twilight,
Today I got eaten in the forest. This is your fault.
Love, Discord
Twilight’s jaw dropped wide open.
She stammered for a few seconds.
“Oh my goodness, oh no, oh no no no no no no NO! This can’t be! Discord came snooping around in my house while I wasn’t home!”
Twilight reread the note.
Somehow, the full meaning of the words on the paper didn’t make themselves clear to her the first time.
It was obviously a lie. It was so obvious. What the note claimed was simply impossible. It was clearly an attempt by Discord to confuse and anger her.
And it was working.
“Why that… How dare he…”
There was a knock on her door.
Twilight stared back at the door in surprise.
She couldn’t let herself lose her temper with Spike in the house!
Nor could she tell him what exactly had happened. Not just yet. Not until she could figure everything out for herself.
She crumpled the piece of paper and threw it in her garbage can.
“Come in!” she forced herself to say.
The door opened and Spike came inside, holding a short list.
“Um, Twilight?” he said nervously. “I have some bad news...”
“There’s books that are unaccounted for?” asked the librarian helplessly.
“Well... yes. Four of them.”
“Four? Which ones?”
She dreaded what Spike’s answer would be.
“Well, first of all, there’s the Colt Scout’s Handbook, thirty-first edition.”
‘What?’ thought Twilight in surprise. That wasn’t exactly the sort of book she had expected Discord to be interested in.
Why would he want a book like that?
She tried to remember what exactly it contained.
‘Let’s see... It contains lessons about serving one’s community, working together with groups, and information on how to survive in the wilderness.’
Realistically, Discord could have only been interested in the book for one of those things.
Even more alarms started to sound in Twilight’s head as she began to realize exactly what Discord was probably up to.
And that he might not exactly come clambering back to her like she had expected.
“O- okay, and what else?” she asked, masking her fear from her assistant.
“Second is a book called... Bonny Rabbit and the Forbidden Garden?”
‘Huh?’ thought Twilight, once more thrown off by Discord’s apparent interest in literature. ‘Why in Equestria would Discord steal a foal’s story?’
“And next?”
“Next is... Um...”
“What is it?” cried Twilight, who then cringed at her own urgency, but said nothing.
“You’re not going to like it...” Spike warned. “The third missing book is... The History of Magic In Equestria, unabridged edition.”
Twilight felt this one was a personal blow. That was one of her all-time favorite books in the entire library!
But, she had to admit, a more important question was what Discord wanted with that particular book. It could be for any number of things. The book was over a thousand pages long!
Eventually, she decided that his interest in the book must be out of desperation for some alternate method of regaining his powers. It would be a fruitless endeavor, she was certain. Princess Celestia had made it clear that there was no other way for Discord to receive his powers again other than for her to return them to him personally. And she trusted the princess completely.
“And the fourth?”
“A book that was simply called Alchemy and Potions.”
‘What?’ thought Twilight once again, no longer surprised by her own... surprise. ‘That seems oddly specific.’
Suddenly, a new line of thought crossed her mind.
And she felt the anxiety within her grow to something bordering terror.
“Thank you, Spike!” she hurriedly cried. “Um, could you please tidy up that mess downstairs now? I have some- things, I have things to do! Important things! Very important things!”
Spike gave Twilight a funny look.
“Are you sure? Is everything alright, Twilight?”
“No, things aren’t alright! I’ve- I’ve had a stressful day today! And now I have to sit down and figure out what in the wide, wide world of Equestria we’re going to do with Discord!”
That at least was basically the truth.
Spike nodded his head.
“That makes sense,” he agreed. “I’ll just be getting out of your mane then.”
Twilight didn’t answer as Spike closed the door.
The instant the door was closed, she cast a spell from her horn. The spell would prevent anyone outside of her room from hearing the incoming panic attack she felt coming.
“Oh, this is bad! This is bad! I can’t believe I’ve underestimated Discord’s resourcefulness and ingenuity! It’s bad enough that he stole all of those other books, but alchemy and potions? Do you even realize what he might do with that book?” she shouted to nopony.
“Without magic, he’s completely helpless! But the art of potion making is the art of bottling up and exploiting magic from external sources! If he figures out how to make magic potions, there’s no telling what kind of trouble he’ll suddenly be able to stir up!”
“Calm down, calm down!” she cried. “It’s not as bad as it seems!” she insisted, obviously trying to convince herself of the truth of this statement. “What are the odds that Discord is planning on making magic potions? Odds are, he just stole that book at random, just like that silly book about the rabbit! And, even if he is planning something, ponies have an incomplete understanding of potion making, unlike the zebra tribes, who guard their knowledge with a passion.
“The plain and simple truth is that the ponies who wrote that book have almost no idea how alchemy actually works! There is no educational material in that book, it’s just a very short list of known potion recipes that just happen to work because... because of reasons that we don’t even understand!
“And, come to think of it, all of those recipes are for potions that cure magical ills, or just beauty enhancement, or things like that! There’s nothing malicious in there! So, there is nothing to worry about! Nothing at all!” she finished uneasily.
“I can’t believe Discord broke into my room!” she screamed. “And left this- this idiotic note to taunt me! ‘Today I got eaten’! What in the heavens does that even mean!
“And to think I was actually feeling guilty about letting that pain of a draconequus wander into danger! To think that I was stupid enough to worry about him hurting himself!
“And, TO THINK THAT I THOUGHT FOR THE SMALLEST FACTION OF A SECOND, THAT MAYBE, JUST MAYBE, HE HAD SOMEHOW DEVELOPED FEELINGS FOR ME! That lying, scheming, selfish, egotistical, uncaring, cruel, FIEND!"
Twilight let out a screech that sounded like it might have come from a large bird instead.
“What in Equestria should I have expected?” she asked herself desperately. “Discord has a millennia-long track record of toying with emotions for- for his own petty, sadistic pleasure! Why should he care about ME?
“Well, I hope you’re happy, Discord! You have officially driven me insane!”
Finally, she stopped to catch her breath.
“I... oh dear, what am I going to tell the Princess? I have to tell her what’s happened now, I just have to! But...
“But not like this. Not with me falling apart at my seams! I... I think I might be over-reacting! Am I over-reacting? I can’t even tell! I think I am! I need some time. I need to relax. That’s what I’ll do. I’ll just have to do my best to forget about everything for tonight and worry about it in the morning...
“It’s just one night!” she insisted to herself. “One night! Equestria can take care of itself for just one night! I’ll just settle in with my book and pull myself together and everything will make sense in the morning, and I’ll approach this in a logical, composed manner.”
Finally, Twilight let allowed her hysteric rant to end. Without any more words, she threw herself onto her bed. After a moment of hesitation, she levitated her book off of her end table and began to read.
Unbeknownst to Twilight, the very cause of her torment was not even a single meter away, separated from her only by a mattress and the frame of her bed, curled up in a rather uncomfortable position as he hoped to remain unnoticed in the silent night air, which was now pierced only by the sound of the occasional turning page.
‘Well, this is a fine mess I’ve gotten myself into...’
I'm going to be honest here. I managed to even shock me with this one. 
To be fair, this is still 'evil' Discord, so I guess this sort of thing might be expected, just a little.
Let's go back to frivolous fun with Discord for a good while.
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You know what's really creepy? That note that Discord wrote Twilight in this chapter.
I laughed at it. I think its funny.
And then, Twilight's reaction just kind of wrote itself.
And I realized just how crazy-much of an effect it had, in quite a big way.
I think my mindset might be disturbingly similar to Discord's.
Nice, also love the ending.
7402424
Imagine if Twilight ever discovers Discord spent the night in her bedroom.
Worse, imagine if Rarity discovers it
7402536
Rarity discovering it would be pretty amusing.
Discord wasn't really wrong I felt. It was a form of extortion. "Do what we say, or your not getting your magic back" That's what I've always felt, and before everything that happened currently; if Celestia didnt think she could make use of his powers. Well then, he would have remained a statue
I think I can see the ending.
After Discord continues to get her angry, Twilight no longer becomes an alicorn, but instead becomes the first-documented fire-mane pony in several thousand years, an even more unique phenomena than an alicorn
7403384 That...
7402960
It's not really extortion, though -- not in the show, where they didn't take his powers away. Holding "we could turn you to stone" over his head is really more like "you've been paroled, but don't rob any more banks or we'll throw you in jail again." I mean, his chaos is not harmless. Just because nopony dies doesn't mean he doesn't do a lot of damage.
In this, I gotta wonder, if they have the power to take his powers away, why didn't they do it before? Letting him free without his powers seems far less cruel than putting him in stone; in the show it's pretty clear stone was the only option.
7405649 Some people are too perceptive for their own good... It's like you can see the future. I guess I shouldn't be surprised though, considering that you are pretty much responsible for shaping my vision of Discord in fiction. Good on you for being the first to look at things other side of the coin.
Oh... the romance it's going to be between Twilight and Discord?
Her screams seems to be at least hinting that XD
I am hoping there is a segment where Discord is teaching the jackalopes about chaos, and I can just hear an abridged version of We are Number One being sung.
Do it, author, before I add another thing to my "To Do After Lots of Procrastination" list!
7718823 I don't really see how I could do that without it seeming like a pointless thing that doesn't have much to do with the story. I just don't see how such a thing could fit. I was actually considering a scene where the jackalopes kidnap Angel Bunny tho...
I love this story. Discord is awesome even without any of his powers while being entirely believable and - for a given value of - realistic. Twilight is characterized just as well, especially her not-quite breakdown. Even the other characters are genuine and fun, what little we see of them.
Looking forward to reading more of this.
Ok, firstly; I know I am completely late to the party by over a year, feel free to disregard the following since it would be insane to expect you to change something over a year old and sixteen-ish chapters back. This is meant more as general advice for the future, not an expectation to change a scene this far back.
One issue I noticed, this section beginning here
to the end of chapter feels rather awkward.
She is literally expositing for no reason other than to inform the reader exactly what the meaning of the books he took are and what her feelings are regarding all of this, and it feels like exactly that.
A slightly better/different way to do it would be to write it as a mental conversation she's holding with herself to reason through it all. Ex: 'blahblah alchemy basics, Discord has a plan, this is not good. How can I stop this.' 'Oh, wait. Ponies know virtually nothing about alchemy so he can't do anything even with the book.' Etc.
Or another option would be to have her explain the situation to either Spike, any of the Mane6, or even an inanimate object (Smarty Pants for example) to relieve her stress/help herself assimilate the information.
In practical terms it's all the same, you're really telling the readers what's up, but these alternate methods would help make it feel more "real" (showing, not telling, etc.) Her dialogue and behavior just feel unnatural in that section, no-one actually acts like that in reality so it takes you out a bit.
Criticism offered freely and with no malice intended.
8378202
It would be strange to hear people react like that in real life, but Twilight has been portrayed to have over the top panic attacks where she goes on about what could go wrong, so in comparison to that, I don't feel that it is anything out of the ordinary. In fact, I didn't even intend the scene to be an exposition for the reader's sake. You guys have been reading for a bit by now, you already know the stuff she says aside from the potions thing. It's just her having a small panic attack as she realizes that she needs to take things more seriously.
For a second I thought it said extortion free instead of exertion free!