The Fugitive Draconequus

by Ironskull

The Beginnings of a Plan

“Why are you stopping?” I ask my furry guides in confusion. “I thought we were actually going somewhere safe. This looks the same as everywhere else.”

The leader of the bunch chatters back to me in answer, but I don’t really understand, so I just shrug at him.

He’s pulling on my leg. I guess I’ll humor him.

He seems to be really interested in this gnarly tree on this hill side.

Looks like a boring old tree to me. They had better not expect me to crawl inside of a hollow or something.

Oh. The critter isn’t pointing at the tree, he’s pointing at something on the ground beside the roots of the tree, which are partially above the ground.

There’s a hole.

Another burrow?

“You do realize that I am much too large to fit in there, right?” I ask the jackalope cluster bemusedly.

The leader shakes his head, and then hops to the edge of the hole, and then squeaks some nonsense down into it.

The resulting noise isn’t quite what I expected. It sounds almost as though he had squeaked into a hollow jug, only more so.

I look down into the hole with renewed interest.

To my great annoyance, the sun is blocked by my own head and I can’t see anything.

After trying a couple of different positions, I’ve found a way to look into the hole and still have a sliver of light shine through it.

This hole is much deeper than I thought. And, much to my surprise, the bottom isn’t dirt. It looks like stone. And it’s strangely clean.

“Okay,” I say to the jackalopes. “But how am I supposed to get in there?”

The spokesrabbit of the group suddenly puts both of his paws out in front of them and shakes them once, a clear sign that he wants me to wait. And then he turns to the rest of his family and chatters some nonsense.

Oh. Huh. Now they’re all digging into the side of the hill. With their bare paws.

Good grief! For such tiny little things, they’re cutting through fast. They’re piling up excess dirt in a neat little pile.

Suddenly, one of them stops working and says something to me.

Umm... What is he saying...

Is... she, I think this one is a she, asking if I can fit through the doorway that they’ve made?

Well, of course I can’t! Any rabbit should plainly be able to see what a tight squeeze that will be if I try that! I don’t mind getting dirty, but really, what’s wrong with just expanding the hole some more?

I look at the critter and prepare to tell it exactly what I think.

For some reason, I hesitate.

She looks a little tired. Obviously, she would rather not have to work any harder than necessary.

I hear you, girl. This physical exertion business is for the birds.

That’s just a little expression I picked up from the ponies. It doesn’t really make much sense.

Which is obviously why I adopted it.

You know what? I can work with this. Getting a little dirty isn’t a problem for me, unlike some ponies. There’s no point in wearing my little workers out. As annoying as it is, their energy isn’t boundless, and neither is mine, and we’re going to need all the strength we can spare.

Chaos, when did I become such a conservationist?

Oh, right. When I lost my endless supply of power.

Curse those ponies.

“Yeah, that’s enough,” I tell the jackalopes. “Move out of the way.”

They obey right away.

I stare at the hole and sigh.

This is the sort of thing I unconsciously agreed to go through when I ran off like that.

I honestly had no idea at the time.

And this is almost certainly just the beginning.

I’m putting this off, aren’t I?

Alright, alright, I’m going. Here we go…

Oh, perfect, I’ve got dirt getting under my claws.

I’ll worry about that later.

Hmm. And it would appear that I underestimated the difficulty. I actually slipped through like a snake, with only minor difficulty.

I raise my fingers and-

Oh. Was I really about to snap my claws clean?

Yes, I was. This shouldn’t be embarrassing! My magic is supposed to be a principal component of my lifestyle! It’s a routine that shouldn’t have ever been disrupted in the first place, and now I’m acting as though my old habits are something to be ashamed of!

Although, I seriously do need to stop doing that. I’m making myself look like an idiot.

Fortunately, I’m able to smoothly transition from almost snapping to picking the dirt out with my other hand.

I think I got the worst of it.

Alright, enough of that. Let’s see what I’ve literally gotten myself into. I look up and get a look at the chamber I’m now in.

Whoa.

Who knew that these critters had such civility?

The first thing that I’ve noted is that they’ve got rabbit sized furniture. Little chairs and tables made of woven tiny twigs.

What.

They’ve even got these large woven trays, each filled with different bits of plant matter. Roots, nuts, some sort of leafy greens…

I guess that’s lunch.

Come to think of it, it’s a good thing that I can eat pretty much anything ever.

I’m honestly not looking forward to it though.

Oh, stop feeling sorry for yourself, Discord! You have far more important things to be worrying about than meals that aren’t loaded with sugary flavors. It’s just one more reason the ponies will pay.

Wait a second. What’s this that they’re doing now?

They’re… sweeping the floor.

With leaves.

Okay, so they’re just going to sweep all the dirt into the walls and leave it there. I mean, the walls are literally made of dirt anyway, who cares, right?

The floor is actually what appears to be a slab of orange-grey rock, as opposed to the dirt walls, which apparently are supported by roots from that tree up there. They’re sticking through the wall in several places.

The floor is actually pretty clean now.

I detest cleanliness.

“Look, you guys don’t have to sweep up for my benefit,” I say. “I honestly don’t care in the slightest.”

Well, I do care, but whatever. I’m not that hung up about it.

A couple of them say something back to me, but I have no idea what they are trying to say.

Of course, I didn’t like having dirt in my claws either. I don’t know what I like. I’m just going to stop caring now.

I can’t help but notice that this ‘room’ goes back rather a ways. I have no idea how far back it goes. What little light there is from the holes in the ceiling and wall doesn’t reach back that far.

One of the jackalopes chatters a warning at me, and I realize that they’re about to seal the makeshift doorway.

I guess it can’t be helped, can it? I don’t want uninvited guests showing up. Not that they would be much of a problem, but I don’t want to have to deal with them right now.

I nod and they get to work again, putting the dirt back where it came from and sealing us all inside this cavity in a hillside in the middle of nowhere in the Everfree Forest.

It’s even darker in here than before. The only light is what little pours through the small gaps in the ceiling.

And, as much as I hate to admit it, I don’t want to move around now. I might flatten something.

One of my minions is asking me if I’m alright.

I’m feeling pretty uncomfortable at the moment, actually.

Can’t imagine why though. I’m not scared of the dark.

Some ponies are scared of the dark. I think it’s because they’re scared of something that they can’t see jumping out at them.

Those fears are perfectly justified, of course. Usually, it’s me doing the scaring. At least, in my own experiences.

But around here, there’s definitely nothing to be scared of.

... There is nothing to be scared of, right?

Of course not, this is my minions’ home, for chaos’s sake!

Why does that give me such confidence?

Well, because they would be idiots to entrench themselves here if it wasn’t completely secure!

I have to know for sure.

“Hey, there’s nothing… dangerous back there, is there?” I ask, thumbing toward the far end of the room.

None of them answer at first, but they’re giving me nervous looks.

I should have known.

“Oh, you’ve got to be kidding me!” I cry. “Is there something else living in here with you?”

One of them shakes his head hastily.

“Well, what’s over there then?” I insist, frustrated.

The critter starts making wide gestures with its arms.

“There’s giant fish?” I ask.

The jackalope crosses his arms and stomps before flinging his arms outward. And now he’s repeating the gesture again. And now he’s pointing all over the room.

Oh, hang on a second, is he pointing at the room?

“There’s another chamber?” I suggest. He nods. “And it’s even bigger than this one?”

The jackalope nods, and then spreads his arms apart again, as far apart as he can make them get.

“It’s huge?”

Another nod.

“Do you ever go down there?”

It shakes its head, and then shivers.

“You’re scared to?”

Another nod.

Somehow, I actually understand why the critter feels that way. Just looking over there is giving me a funny feeling.

It’s not something I can sense with any of the usual five senses.

It feels like…

Triangles.

What in Equestria?

...

HOLD ON A MOMENT NOW.

Holy chaos, I was right! It’s not coming from my five senses at all. It’s coming from my sixth sense!

Suddenly I know exactly what this feeling is.

Magic.

Ha! HAHAHAHAHA! I can’t believe I didn’t pick up on this sooner!

Oh, I’m so happy! Even though they took away all of my magic, they couldn’t take this away from me!

I can still sense the magic around me, regardless of what form it takes!

I’m so excited! I can’t believe I haven’t noticed until now! It’s just been something I’ve been used to for so long, I’ve been taking it for granted this entire time, and I didn’t even realize it was still there this whole time!

I can feel the magic in the air around me! I can feel it in the trees outside! I can feel it in the jackalopes! And I can feel it-

Whoa.

Now that I’m taking the time to take a closer look...

That area where this giant cavern is supposed to be has a lot of magic, admittedly hidden away quite a fair ways, and pretty deep down underground too.

But that’s not just any kind of magic down there.

I just can’t believe what I’m sensing right now.

I swear, if I didn’t know better, I would say that it feels like primordial magic. And I don't know better.

That’s the stuff that was floating around Equestria before it was Equestria! Back when the world was brand new!

... How do I know that?

Oh dear. I don’t remember. I’m pretty sure that particular piece of information is definitely older than two thousand years, and unfortunately anything older than that starts to get pretty fuzzy for me.

How in Equestria is there honest to chaos primordial magic still in the world today? That’s inconceivable! That particular brand of magic doesn’t last long in the world, by its very nature! It naturally combines with itself in all kinds of unpredictable ways, potentially forming just about any and all forms of magic in existence! Well, other than chaos magic, anyway. That’s a special case. But that’s not the point! The point is that it should have melded together into some other form of magic a looooong time ago!

Although, I suppose, if it were to still exist somewhere, some place underground where it is cut off from outside stimulous would be the most likely place for it to survive, as unlikely as it still is.

Of course, primordial magic is useless in its basic form. It has to be refined into greater complexity in order to actually be useful, but then it isn’t primordial magic any more. It becomes other forms of magic. If you refine it for long enough, you get the stuff that carries real power. Like unicorn magic. Or pegasus magic and earth pony magic. Or gryphon magic, or dragon magic, or even apple magic.

Why, even the tree of harmony has a giant hole in the fabric of space right in the middle of it where harmony magic just gushes forth into the world in an endless torrent.

Good thing I’m not particularly close to it right now.

But while highly refined forms of magic tend to be found in living things, there is no way a node of primordial magic would be. I’m almost certain that this one here is just a free floating gap into the ether. If I could just get my fingers on that thing, I might be able to actually figure out some way to ‘assemble’ different kinds of magic to suit my needs. It would be at a trickle rate, of course. I mean, I’ve never had a reason to before, but now-

...

I just figured out what I’m going to do today.

I’m actually feeling motivated now. Focused.

I need this. It might not be much, and it certainly won’t give me my powers back, but I am determined now. I don't even have any idea how I'll even possibly harness it's energy yet. That's a problem I'll figure out some other time.

Unfortunately, I can’t just go diving down there willy-nilly. Not in the unfortunate state I find myself in now.

Its pitch black down there. I can’t see a thing.

Bah! That's not going to slow me down! I may not be able to ignore that problem, but I'll get around it somehow!

I have a spelunking expedition to plan.

Which means I’m going to need tools. A shovel, a chisel, a pickaxe, a kazoo, some light sources, bungee cords, and lots and lots of food, preferably something tasty...

Fortunately, the Everfree Forest is known for having an ample supply of such things.

Oh, yeah. It’s not. It’s known for being dangerous, of course.

Sigh.

I’m going to have to steal it.

As I’m plotting out possible ways to get into Ponyville unnoticed, I notice that the jackalopes are preparing lunch.

One of them is cracking a nut open.

With a diamond.

I wonder where he could have got that...

I can’t help the grin that spreads across my face.

Maybe I don’t have to steal everything.

Now, who do I know who might be willing to unknowingly become my dealer...?

Comments

[Ironskull]

The first chapter got a pretty good reception, so I decided to put this out early, as a little extra. A lot more adventure/exposition than comedy this time. It's much easier to write comedy when Discord is interacting with ponies, but there will be lots of that pretty soon.

I'm currently on vacation, which means I'm not letting video games consume my free time for once. So I'll probably have plenty of free time to continue this for a little while.

[Ratmandango]

Nice.

[GoldenChaos]

is this going to be Discolight?

[Ironskull]

7400144 Yes.

[Emperor]

I'm finding Discord's rambling point-of-view pretty hilarious here, especially since I have the feeling his antics are going to cause even more chaos than he did otherwise.

Now let's see how long it takes Twilight and Celestia before they realise they bucked up.

[Cozybro]

7400144
Dammit, that shipping name is way too good.

[wlam]

This story really is surprisingly enjoyable. I often find Discord stories not a whole lot of fun because they typically "flanderize" him in some way or another and turn him into more of an omnipotent plot device than a real character with meaningful internal conflicts. This one is already starting to show some serious inner complexity. Plus, I really wouldn't be surprised if the actual character's internal monologue sounded a whole lot like that. It has his playful whimsicality down pretty well.