The Adventure of His Life

by John the brony and yknow

Ponyville

A nice, ambitious, pegasus pony named Clever Clogs arrived Ponyville, he had a green mane, a dark gray coat and a golden gear for cutie mark, he had decided that after a lot of studying and struggle he could look for ways to meet new people and have a good work, he had traveled for long carrying a somewhat heavy bag so he was tired and a bit pecky, the first thing in his imaginary to do list was getting a snack, since he was new in Ponyville he didn't know where a food store was, so he started walking around to see if he could find a store.

He noticed that the buildings were a bit old fashioned like those of the Middle Ages, but he liked them and thought they were very nice, the ponies there were nice too, their attitude matched the humble style of the town, this was a lifestyle he kinda liked and was searching for, a calm, simple life, but he also wanted a bit of action, intrigue, it was something that completed his life and avoided him of being bored.

After some walking around he didn't find a place where to eat, so he had to ask for some directions, something that bothered him because he was quite stoic, and since he was in a new place, he did distrust a bit of the townsponies, maybe they were being nice to each other? He thought, he saw around searching for a pony who looked nice enough.

He then saw a pink pony who was skipping, making a bouncy noise every time she did, she had a smile on her face and was singing a song so he thought he could ask her. "Hello, I'm new in town and I'd like to know if-" He was cut off when she jumped into the air and gave him a long loud gasp, and then ran away, Clever Clogs grimaced, then frowned processing what had just happened. "Well, I think I will have to ask whoever I find in my way." He stated, walking off again.

After getting some directions from a big red stallion, Clever Clogs arrived to the praised bakery of Ponyville: Sugar Cube Corner, He could already smell the delicious treats his stomach was waiting for, not only that, but maybe he could also get a job here as a baker or maybe as a vendor, but maybe he was expecting too much too fast, his stomach growled, reminding him of the quest he had to complete, fulfill his hunger, he opened the door and was greeted by a round blue mare with a pink mane.

"Welcome ,what can I get you." The mare said kindly.

"Hi, how you doing? My name's Clever Clogs and I'm searching for something tasty to take." He then stops at the showcase looking at the shelfs full of cakes.

"You can call me Miss Cake, and we have some good things to eat here." Mrs. Cake said.

"Wow, there sure are a lot of things to choose from, very sweet things" Clever Clogs said drooling a bit.

"Oh yes," the then chuckles. "We have cookies, cupcakes, buns, cakes." She said while pointing at them.

"Hmm," he looked at the showcase, then to the mare and her mane style. "You know, your make kinda reminds me of a cupcake frosting," He said playfully, making both of them laugh "So I'll have a cupcake." He said.

"One cupcake coming up," She said as she put the cupcake on the counter. "It'll be 2 bits."

Then Clever Clogs takes two bits out of his bag and took his cupcake, "Thanks." He said as another pony entered the store, he wearing a jacket and a fedora and had a scar on his eye, Clever Clogs took notice of the suspicious appearance of the pony, scaring him a bit, so he hurried up with what he had to do.

"Um, Miss Cake," at this point the pony was next to him, "I am new in town and I was wondering if there is any chance I can get a job here" The pony saw him puzzled, he returned the view just for a second before talking to Miss Cake again. "Uhh... B-because, you know, I am a good baker and stuff, and well..." He remain silent for a moment.

"Well, think about it ok? Heheh, bye. Sorry for interrupting you buddy." He gave the pony pat on the back.

Clever Clogs went out of the store, sweating, his heart pounding in his chest, He hasn't been so scared in his life, he even got so scared that he forgot about his hunger, he shook his head and walked away from the store, eating his cupcake as he walked.

After calming down Clever Clogs thought that it would be a good idea to ask other ponies if they could provide him a job, after all, he wasn't sure if Miss Cake would provide him a job, and even if she did, he wasn't sure if it was a secure place, and he wasn't going to be a guard there, no way! He had a good amount of bits, but he knew that they wouldn't last forever, so he started looking for stores again.

As he asked ponies about places where to go, he realized that he had less and less oportunities there, he couldn't work at Rarity's boutique; he wasn't good at sewing or anything similar, he was too tough to work at the spa, and he would probably wound the clients, and his negotiation skills weren't good enough to work at Quills and Sofas, the only option left was the flower selling, a job so boring he was doubtful about it, but he could still give it a try.

It was afternoon and Clever Clogs was thinking about that pony he saw early, why would a pony like that come to a place like this? Why did he look at me? Do I know him?, he was getting nervous but he forgot it when he arrived at the flower store, It looked more like a house than a store, so he thought if he played his cards right, he could spend the night there, but again, he was expecting too much too early, so he was just going to see if he could get a job there.

"Hello?" Nopony answers. "I am Clever Clogs and-" A Red maned mare interrupted him as she appeared from behind the door.

"Hello there I'm Roseluck, and these here are Daisy and Lily Valley." He meet them. "What can we get you?" Roseluck says.

"Um, no-nothing really, I don't want flowers right now ok? I just-" He was interrupted again.

"He doesn't want flowers?" Daisy said dramatically.

"You don't want flowers?" Lily said in an even more dramatical way.

"No, I was here-"

"He doesn't wants flowers!" They said in unison.

"Our flowers, no longer wanted" Roseluck said to a pot, and then they all but Clever Clogs fell to the ground... Dramatically...

"Uhh... You okay there?" He said to them, but had no response, "Hello?" He tapped the head of Roseluck, "Hey I need you up!" He adressed Lily Valley, "Alright then, I will buy some flowers." They then stood up quickly.

"Which ones would you like good stallion? Dandelions, Roses, Sunflowers..." He continued to recieve more and more flower options untill they stopped.

"I would like..." He thought for a second, choosing which of the big variety of flowers he would buy, "That flower." He pointed to a 'Dianthus caryophyllus', or commonly known as 'Carnation', that was in a pot, alone, isolated from the other flowers.

"Oh that's a good choice, a Carnation, it'll be one bit" Lily said, fluttering her eyes.

"There you go, thanks" He takes a bit from his bag and leaves it in the stand, "Now ladies, I came here because-"

"Goodbye!" Daisy says.

"Have a good night sir." Roseluck farewells you as they enter the house.

And with that he is left in the cold air of the evening, "Hmph," He sighed, "Well, I guess they don't need another vendor... Good for me." After thinking a lot about what had happened, he left the house-store and searched for a place to sleep.

On his way, he noticed that the streets were very alone, and no sound could be heard, this made him nervous as he remembered that pony who had entered the bakery earlier, and just when he was about to brush that thought away, heard some loud hoofsteps around the corner, oh no, he thought, he looked back and what he saw was even more frightening.

Behind him, was said pony with the scar and another two ponies behind him, one of them was wearing a belt with a knife and the other one had a chain around his body, yep, the typical gang, probable searching for trouble, maybe they're not following me, Clever Clogs thought speeding up his pace.

This made the other three of them speed up event more, Clever Clogs started to jog, and the three behind him started to trot, that’s it, I’m out! He thought before sprinting at full speed towards nearby buildings, going through alleys and dropping trash cans, hoping that this would slow them down.

"Get him!" One of the ponies shouted before they too started sprinting towards him, they ran street after street without event running into somepony el se, Clever Clogs didn't want to make a fuss out of this so he didn’t scream for help or anything, in fact, he was kind of enjoying it, he wanted some action un his life after all.

After a lot of running, Clever Clogs was getting tired, and the gang ponies were getting close to him, he entered another alley but when he was just going to get away from them, he saw a big pony standing at the end of the alley, he was trapped, and this might be the end, but then he remembered something.

"I can fly!" He said before taking off the ground, he wasn’t the best of fliers, but at least he could quickly escape from his persecutors.

"Oh no, you cannot!" Said the pony with the belt, and after grabbing his knife, he threw it to the air, sticking into one of Clever Clogs wings, he could no longer use that wing properly, so he just fell and crashed to the ground.

"Be careful you dumbass, you could have killed him!" The pony with the chain stated.

"It’s ok, I have good aim" the other pony said.

"Alright guys, calm down, at least we have him" He looked down at Clever Clogs, who was now wounded and in pain, "What is wrong with you? Didn't boss tell you about us?" This question confused Clever Clogs, he had no idea who these guys were.

"Boss? Who are you? What do you want?" Clever Clogs said trembling.

"Whatever, you'll know when you get there... 'Baker'" The scar-in-eye said as he struck his hoof against Clever Clogs face, and everything faded to black for him.

Author's Note:

Last part was written in my phone so its a bit weird.

Comments

[Time Reaper]

Un his way

On his way out,

Other problems I have found are on structure (or at least n the way your writing this), there's little description on what's going on (the town around him, the faces of those he interact with, etc) which give us little to feel when the time comes for the drama. If I find more details I'll tell you. But do give this a second read and fix a few details here.

[John the brony and yknow]

7397428
fixed