- Member Since 24th Jan, 2016
- offline last seen Jan 15th, 2021
ForgottenDreams
I bid you welcome traveler let this ancient storyteller do what he does best. https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCcsS60n04i48UCZJ0lYPGsQ
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They're eating her! And then they're gonna eat me!
OH MY GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD!
Not a fan of apples.
what the buck just happened
I mean this is basically Applejacks rainbow factory 
which means I already want to burn the place down and send applejack to HELL
I think... the story is really good, and rather eerie, but the dialogue is rather awkward and ruined it a bit for me. It's a neat concept though!
7533096 I know what you mean. It is more difficult than what most people realize to keep an established character in character when writing a story like this. In truth though that is part of their charm. To see who can write the most believable horror story and keep the characters the same. I tried and in this case a failed, but it is still a good story and I stand by it.
Nice horror fic
7540660 Thank you.
7541687 Your welcome
Hm.. The writing reminded me somewhat of Butterflies. Which is cool. It was a nice little fic, I've only one nit pick, and it's really just personal preference. Good job on the story.
7560294 thank you
So I just finished reading your story and I must say I actually think it's pretty good, there was good pacing, great vocabulary, a nice story, and a fantastic ending! There were some grammar mistakes but nothing to make me wanna rip my eyes out XD jk I'm not really a grammar Nazi but when it comes to stories it just slithers into my soul. I do feel like there could be some things you could add to the story but all in all, it was a really great fic! Great job ^^
7613243 Thank you
7613574 can I make a proposition ? :)
7613582 I'm listening
7613600 me and my friend would like to do anot audio reading on YouTube of your story ^^
7613604 Is it Swift Blade? I ask because he has also asked to do a reading of it. You may do a reading of it if you like I only have two conditions. First let me be the one to debut it. It is part of my month of Macabre series and it needs to be the first for it to be successful. You may do yours after I do mine. Second send me a link when you upload it so I can see it.
7613621 it is not with swift blade and we'll of course, I mean it's your story so you'd get credit for your story, but if someone else wants to read it I don't want to steal that away from them also where would you debut it?
7613627 It will be uploaded to youtube on October 21st
7613672 yeah sorry I can't do that, not because I don't respect you, I do, but I'm not letting someone take credit for my video, you'd get credit for your story to the fullest extent, but not the video
7613677 I think something got lost in the conversation. I wouldn't expect you to do that I just want to be the first youtube reading of it is all.
7613697 oh wait so you would like to read your own story first?
7613702 Yeah. Wait what exactly are you wanting to do with my story?
7613704 I just want to read it and post it on youtube, and I'd give you credit for the story, link your account, link your story, post your name on screen and say it is your story before and after the reading
7613715 you know there are multiple readings of popular stories on youtube right? Just look at The Cough as an example it has like 10+ readings of it each with its own flare. If you want to do a reading of it its fine all I am asking is to be the first one is all.
7613740 oh well yeah of course, I thought you were saying to post my video
7613745 you mean like a repost? No I do not deal or tolerate that shit! All I am saying is let me be the first video of it then after that send me a link to your video so I can watch it is all.
7613748 no my boi I'd be making my own video XD I'm saying I thoughthink you were implying for me to give you my video after I'm done with it and then once you posted it then I could post it after you, that's what I thought you were implying
7613759 That's um... something. I just want to see how well you do it is all.
7613770 but no I'm fine with you posting yours first them me posting mine after, but I am also pondering reading my own story, I just don't wanna feel like I'm self promoting or something
7613775 Don't second guess yourself you found something that you want to do follow through with it. There is nothing wrong with a little self promotion
7613803 I suppose your right, I might read your story another time, I think I actually will read mine
And then the next time an ancient evil of super villainy rises Applejack, the apple family, and the queen of the dryads all died because the group wasn't all together and thus unable to save the world. The End.
This makes 'Apple Eyes' look like a Disney movie! Nice job
You can has review!
Celestia will find out about this eventually, then Applejack can enjoy her apples, rotting in a dungeon cell.
BOOOOOO! Applejack, BOOOOOOOOO!
This story has some similarities with MLP grimdark 'Butterflies'. This time Fluttershy being the victim.(In Butterflies, Fluttershy is the perpetrator.) Applejack manages to show Fluttershy her own 'orchard'. However, Fluttershy felt disgust about it. In Butterflies, Fluttershy shows Pinkie Pie her collection of butterflies, but Pinkie didn't really enjoy it. Poor Fluttershy. Poor Twilight. Twilight is my favorite character.
Also, I think this story is a story that shows the dark side of Applejack. This time Applejack's psychopath version. Check out 'An Apple Sleep Experiment' to find out her sociopath version.
If I was in the story, I won't try the fruit. It sounds disgusting.