• Member Since 23rd Mar, 2016
  • offline last seen 4 hours ago

The Bricklayer


Slow down, you're doing fine, you can't be everything you want to be, before your time... -Vienna, The Stranger: Billy Joel

T
Source

Twilight's been down on her luck for years, and mocked about her belief that the lost city of Neighlantis ever existed. But now, things for her are about to change as one Fancy Pants himself believes in this lost city of legend, and wants to mount a expedition to find it. However, the voyage to the deep dark corners of the seas is perilous and might just be no place for a scholar as many dangers await her, from monsters long forgotten to that captain who seems to have his own agenda about hunting these creatures. And that's not counting the Moby's crewponies who may very well drive Twilight up the wall... (Sci-Twi/Night Glider pairing)

Starring as the crew of the Moby Dick:
Twilight Sparkle
Fancy Pants
Bulk Biceps
Lightning Dust
Silver Spanner
Night Glider
Silver Speed
And Captain Rainbow Blaze along with various ponysonas/OCs including my own.

Inspired by 20,000 Leagues under the Sea and Atlantis: The Lost Empire Cover art property of cuha so credit to them. OCs property of their original creators.

Chapters (28)
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Comments ( 329 )

Faved, and liked, also I just saw your response on my latest blog, and yes

7409616 Sure, anypony is welcome. You joining would bring the OC crewmember count up to four, counting mine, and there is still space for six others.

A 20k league inspired story? You have my attention, i loved that book through out school.

Ok you had my intention, now you have my interest. Let see where this goes.

Are we going to see any Sea-ponies? :duck:

Why doesn't this story have a crossover tag?

7409973 Because its only inspired by 20,000 Leagues, not crossing over with it.

7410376 Sure, just send me up a PM on personality and description.:twilightsmile:

The sea was his only companionship now

companion would be more fitting.

Tarterus-piercer

Tartarus

Wow, it's been ages since I read 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea, brings back some fond memories for me.

So, any more spots for an OC?

7410738 Yeah, I think there's like five spots left.

"But-" Rainbow began, before being cut off by the captain who roared back "No buts boy, I know of what I speak of!"

That needs to be fixed.

This looks to be an interesting tale, and you're accepting OC's eeeeeeeeeh?
:moustache: I have two very explosive sisters that would like to take a dip in this story of yers, if yer interested matey.

Nice job so far.

7411879 Just send their description, names and personality to me in a PM and I'll look em over. Also, thanks for the fave!

7411993
Right oh my good friend, and you're welcome!
Looks intriguing~

You know I often think Atlantis was one of the more underappreciated Disney movies. It's good to see something similar here. Good start to the story by the way, I'll be sure to keep an eye on this one.

7412249 Yeah, it and Treasure Planet got the short end of the stick I think. And thanks for your interest!

7412255 Treasure Planet was actually my other favourite too, and yes they both deserved way more then they got.

A excellent start to the story can't wait for more!

go to the moon then argue

than

sent this city into the abysses

abyss

a huge manor home

remove the word

So sorry for all the theatre

theatrics. I know it's part of the speech from the books' time period but given story's more modern tone, it'd be more appropriate

Heh, figured they'd name the ship after the legendary whale though I wonder if it's the same submersible on the covers or just a regular ship being used as the entrance to the actual thing. Then again, it'd be odd for any dock workers to not notice such a behemoth beneath the waves.

Eh, guess I'll find out soon enough.

And if you caught the Jules Verne reference in this part in the beginning, I tip my hat to you.

Sometimes, he supposed it would be easier to just try and go to the moon then argue this with his master.

If I'm not mistaking it's a reference to "From the Earth to the Moon", another book from Jules Verne.

7413027 Fixed most of the errors, along with one we both missed. And as for the answer to your question, the sub the explorers will be using is exactly the same one you see on the story's cover art.

7413106 Yeah, that would be it. Another tidbit, a group known as the Gun Club was the one to actually send the explorers to the moon in the book.

Comment posted by tuntematon deleted Jul 26th, 2016

I don't mind at all that my character is married. If Sudoku doesn't want them to I'm ok with that. I loved the conversation between Target and Grape.

The reference is the five week trip over Africa in a hot air balloon from the book Five Weeks in a Balloon.

Founds some mistakes.

Rainbow looked as if he was about to a explode like a powder keg,

Ships came and went daily, carrying with them loads of cargo or passengers to and from from the ports to their intended destinations.

This "Grand" voyage is to the bottom of the seas in search of the famous list city of Neighlantis.

lost

As Twilight seethed, she was stunned to see Fancy not looking angry at all despite the many sorrid things said about him in this work of "Journalism".

I think you mean sordid.

The "head" of the ship even looked as if it were able to be able to ram something and take very little damage.

ANother good chapter to this story, so nicely done man :yay:
Aside from this:

"W-What's going on, I thought class was supposed to be starting!" Twilight exclaimed only for Script to reply to her in a mock confused tone "You sure? Maybe your watch is off."

Which is two different ponies talking in the same paragraph, its an awesome start!

Keep it up, can't wait to see the crew, and hopefully... two crazy sisters :pinkiecrazy:

the famous list city of Neighlantis

*Lost

Hohoho, there's guns? :yay: I was unaware of that... I was very unaware of that... should my oc's pop up... they'd probably be using something heavy, like shotguns and/or explosives, and in great quantities :pinkiecrazy: hehehe.

Nice job! Can't wait to see more of the crew! :yay:

last of his funds

fortune would fit better

It was in various shades of brown and gold,

bronze or copper would sound more fitting.

If the papers was right about Fancy spending the last of his fortune on this voyage, then this venture is either Neighlantis or Bust for Fancy. I just hope you're not planning on pulling a Rourke with him.

Also, you should separate speech for each character into their own paragraphs so as to not confuse the readers and make the conversations flow better.

7428674 Relax, you'll show up eventually. Notice how some official characters like Lightning Dust haven't shown up yet as well. I plan to have everypony introduced by chapter five.

7429540 Thanks for pointing that out, DAMN YOU TABLET AUTO CORRECT!!!:derpytongue2::twilightangry2:

7428631
7429552

Again, really want to thank you guys for pointing out these errors.

7430008
Tis quite fine, always happy to help out a fellow writer :yay:

What the heck is with mistreating the griffins and considering than as nothing more than slave labor?

Ponies these day's:fluttershysad: griffins have feelings too. I loved the reference to the song "I Shot the Sheriff".Can't wait to meet more of the crew and to see what happens on this adventure!:rainbowdetermined2:

The griffin gaped

I do believe you mean, gasped

Target began to nod, but then there was the sound of a loud explosion with several loud cackles from somewhere nearby causing her to groan and rub her temples.
"...The Blast Sisters, more of our "Crew". Must be testing some of their infamous explosives." She muttered to herself in distaste, and caused Grape to let out a small squeak of shock and faint once again.
----
"Custom made stuff of course, if ya ever need to blow something up and blow it up good, we're your gals!" She said and added almost as if as a afterthought "Accept no substitutions."

:rainbowlaugh:
Ahhhh this makes me happy as a clam, hahahaha, nicely done man, nicely done!

A dang good chapter, nice to see more of the crew for this glorious little expedition of there's, good work.

7447908 Yeah, my half musically oriented mind couldn't resist. There's another song reference in there as well, namely to the "Ballad of Curtis Loew" by Lynyrd Skynyrd made by Grape Vine.

7447777 Trust me, there will be more. And sorry about Gallant and the anti-griffin bigotry, like I said I am trying to keep things as close to the actual 1930s where possible.

7447948 Didn't the civil war end in the 1800s though? Also, this is F:yay:kmothering Equestria! Wouldn't they be peaceful towards their neighbors?

7447961 Ponies, like people can still harbor prejudice can't they? Besides, this is a ponified version of Earth, not Equestria. Think of it as the human world, but with ponies.

7447961 Just because the civil war ended doesn't mean racial tensions disappeared.

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