Where the Sunflowers Grow

by Bluespectre

Chapter Eight - Beyond Civilisation

CHAPTER EIGHT

BEYOND CIVILISATION

Silence fell around them, except for the occasional snap from the now low burning fire. They were down to their last scraps of firewood, but thankfully the sun, now broaching the horizon, was already sending out its warming rays. Rush yawned,

“…and so, here I am.” he finished.

Queenie shook her head, her eyes as wide as they had been from the start of his story. “I don’t believe it.” she said in amazement, “Is that all true?”

“As the Gods are my witness” Rush said stretching, “Or Goddesses, I suppose.”

The white mare was a good listener, she’d only occasionally interrupted the tale when she wasn’t sure about something or wanted to clarify something she didn’t understand. In a strange way it felt good to finally tell the full tale. Sure, he’d told Grove, but he’d been so soused with wheat beer he could have told him anything. Rush scrunched his face in thought: he couldn’t remember much of that day, other than being worried sick that Tia would be upset with him over his beating by that damned pegasus. Queen’s Court on the other hoof, made him feel surprisingly comfortable with telling his story, despite his reservations about her earlier behaviour. He could see from the corner of his eye she was still watching him intently,

“So…” she began, “What was it like walking on two legs? How come you didn’t fall over all the time?”

Rush shrugged, “The same as you walking on four, I suppose. I didn’t know anything else. The main problem I’ve had has been adapting to this new body.” He lifted a hoof, “These aren’t as good for holding things as hands, but you get used to them.”

Queenie chuckled, “I suppose so.” She looked Rush up and down, “You sure look like any regular stallion I’ve ever met. If it wasn’t for your colour and mentioning ‘Tia’, I would have taken you for just another pony looking for a job.” She snorted, “Except for nearly running yourself to death of course - nopony in their right mind does that. You’re lucky to be alive.”

“You can really die from running too much?” Rush asked incredulously, “I’d heard of people riding their horses to death, but thought it was an exaggeration.” He shook his head, “That’s…frightening. What do you tell foals?”

“Not to do it, you berk!” Queenie rolled her eyes, “It’s not exactly common to do something like that you know - your body usually stops you doing stupid things that will cause yourself damage. Now you on the other hoof, I would guess you either weren’t fully aware of what your body was telling you…” She smirked, “or you’re just a twit.”

“Thanks, Queenie.” Rush sniffed, “You know all the right things to say.”

“It’s a gift” she retorted, giving him a wink, “Anyway, what did you mean that ‘people rode their horses to death’? Did humans actually ‘ride’ ponies? Like, on their back?”

Rush winced at the accusatory look in Queenie’s eyes. He took a breath and chose his next words as carefully as he could, “They weren’t like Equestrians.” He shook his head slowly for emphasis, “They were more like, well, like animals. Warriors rode them into battle, or they worked on farms – that sort of thing.”

“Animals…” Queenie’s eyes narrowed, “We’re all animals, Rush.”

“They weren’t intelligent, Queenie” Rush said quickly, “but they weren’t stupid either. Humans valued horses and took care of them – they were expensive creatures.”

Queenie shuddered, “It sounds like slavery to me.” She stared into the fire, “I don’t mean to sound as though I’m judging you, Rush, but don’t you think that was…wrong?”

Rush shook his head, “Not really, or at least, I didn’t then. I didn’t know anything different. I never owned a horse and when I used to dream of Equestria, I didn’t really see myself as a horse, but rather, well…” he held out his forelegs, “this.”

Queenie sighed, “Yeah.” A moment later she looked up at him, “Rush, how do you see ponies here?”

“Huh? I don’t understand.” Rush asked.

“I mean” Queenie said, leaning towards him, “You must have been used to a society of humans, right? All looking similar, yes?” Rush nodded. “So,” Queenie continued, “Now you’re in Equestria your body has changed, but your mind must still see everypony as…well…a ‘pony’, don’t you?”

Rush shook his head, “No. I see everypony as what they are: my people, and my friends. This is my home, Queenie, as much as I sometimes miss the quiet of the mountains and the beauty and peace of the bamboo forest, Equestria is home.”

“But, what about, you know, love?” she asked a little sheepishly.

Rush frowned, “Love?”

“You and Celestia?” Queenie explained, “Don’t you think it’s weird? I mean, to go from being a two legged bald pink monkey thing, being surrounded by them, males and females, and then all of a sudden, in walks a…a ‘talking horse’, and all of sudden you’re head over hooves for her.” She raised an eyebrow, “I doubt your fellow ‘humans’ would have seen that as anything short of bestiality.”

Rush cringed; he’d tried to avoid talking about his feelings for Tia and especially not with Queenie, but if he knew one thing about ponies, it was that they were insatiable gossips – and bloody nosey too! He groaned inwardly; as much as he hated to admit it, it was probably going to be safest to tackle her questions head on,

“Queenie, Tia and I haven’t…we haven’t done anything like what you’re thinking.”

“You haven’t?” she asked incredulously, “But…ah! I knew it! You are a virgin!”

“Oh, for the Gods’ sake…” Rush flung his forelegs up in exasperation.

“But you have kissed her, right?” Queenie pressed,

Rush nodded, “I…yes, yes I have kissed her.”

“So…what was it like?”

The brown stallion’s eyes went wide, “Eh?!”

“Kissing a creature from another world?” Queenie clarified helpfully.

Rush face hoofed, “Oh for the Gods’ sake, Queenie, I’m from the same world as her!”

“Only technically” the mare replied dismissively, “So, come on then, tell me: what’s it like to kiss a Goddess?”

What was it…? Rush paused, thinking. He remembered looking into her eyes, those incredibly large purple eyes… “It was wonderful…” he said distantly.

“Were her lips soft?”

Rush smiled, “Yes, very. She smelled of lavender, her favourite scent. Every time I smell it, it reminds me of her.”

“Did she put her forelegs around you?”

Rush shook his head, “Not at first.”

“But it was exciting, wasn’t it?” Queenie asked quietly, “That forbidden kiss, that slow fumbling, the coming together of the pure snow white Princess and her stallion, lost to Equestria, but now melting into her embrace…”

Rush nodded, remembering the first time he’d kissed her. It had felt as though his whole world had fallen away from him, disappearing into oblivion: there was only her, his mare, and nothing else mattered but that moment between them.

“Did you use tongues?”

“Mmm” Rush sighed, “Wh…WHAT?!”

Queenie just stared at him before bursting into laughter, “Oh Rush! You’re so easy to tease!”

Rush neighed, pulling himself to his hooves and shook himself off, “And you’re a pain in the arse!” He stormed off to grab what few makeshift supplies he’d been able to scavenge from the washed up wreckage, leaving Queenie shaking with mirth. Blasted mare!

Much huffing, complaining, and grumbling later, he had Queenie strapped to the litter and took up the harness. She hadn’t been happy about it of course, but there was no way she would have been able to hobble anywhere with her leg the way it was. If nothing else, at least they had a direction: upriver, or rather, upstream. It was easier to follow the little bubbling stream rather than the ravaged land around the now deceptively calm river. Here the water was clean, and readily accessible. Food was a problem, but they could last a lot longer without that than they could if they’d had no source of fresh drinking water. Best of all, they were moving, and that was better for keeping up their morale. Rush’s design of the litter was crude of course, but he took pride in the fact that he had been able to make it sturdy, yet comfortable enough, to take the heavy mare. Queenie was obviously still in pain, her occasional whimper when the litter jolted despite Rush’s best efforts, made him cringe inwardly. He had to get her help, and soon: they had no food, no proper shelter, and Queenie’s injuries were troubling him. He had nothing to sterilise them with, nor stitches for the large ones. All he’d been able to do was wash them out and tie makeshift bandages around them made from whatever he’d been able to find washed up. Thankfully he’d managed to find an old chipped bowl for heating water – that had been a godsend, and he’d used it to boil water in so he could clean the mare as much as he could. Rush’s own injuries weren’t causing him too much trouble thankfully; the ‘broken ribs’ he thought he’d had were probably just badly bruised, and certainly nothing like the state he’d been in after the training session with Grove. The bloody lunatic had nearly killed him! Still, what he wouldn’t give to have the orange coated pest with him now…Goddesses, just for a smiling face…

“Rush?”

“Yeah, Queenie?”

“Do you…do you think we can stop for a minute?” Queenie’s voice sounded shaky, “I…I feel a little off…”

“Off?” Rush slowly lowered the litter and trotted round to examine Queenie, “Damn it, you’re burning up.”

She nodded at him as he examined her, “Told you…”

“Damn it.” Rush opened his hoof woven satchel and pulled out the spare piece of blanket he’d torn up into rags and bowl. A quick trip to the stream and he was back. Queenie watched him through bleary eyes, her customary half smile looking more than a little strained,

“You should have left me, soft flanks.” She said hoarsely, “You’re going to wear yourself out pulling me around.”

“Shut up, Queenie for bucks sake” Rush hissed, “I haven’t got time to bury your fat arse in the middle of nowhere.”

“Huh! Some gentlecolt you turned out to be…”

“Then stop whingeing about being left behind all the time.” Rush snapped, “Gods in their heaven, just let somepony help you, will you?”

“Yes, Doc.” She said, trying a smile, “I’ll be a good girl.”

Rush rolled his eyes and wiped Queenie’s muzzle and neck. She kept quiet, but he could feel the heat coming off her, the damp fur steaming slightly just from where he’d wiped her. He had to get her temperature down quickly, but how? All he could think of was using the cool water of the stream, but he couldn’t simply dump her in there. He checked around her hind leg – it was swollen, not too badly, but it was hot to the touch. Queenie been right – without medical treatment it wasn’t looking good. Damn it, why hadn’t he tried harder to learn to read? He was still at the level of a child, and the only herbs he knew from the book were…wait…they’d been growing in a wood, hadn’t they?

Rush stared into the trees, “Queenie, stay here, I’ll be back in a minute. Keep that cloth on your head.”

She looked up at him weakly, “Sure, take your time. It’s not like I’m not going anywhere.”

The wood was refreshingly cool and smelled of the lush greenery Rush had come to associate with Equestria. Ponies, as civilised as they were, appeared to hold a deep connection with the natural world around them, and that manifested itself in the architecture and their respect for the land. The houses, the town, even the palace itself, felt as though somepony had cared enough to design them in such a way as to make them appear completely natural. As new a town as Paddock apparently was, being built after the war to house those uprooted by that terrible conflict, it gave the observer the impression that it had always been there. The palace too, built into the side of a cliff, looked to have been blended into it so as to complement the scenery perfectly. In some respects, the palace was almost fortress like in design, although in a restrained manner, suggesting a hidden power that was merely resting rather than being an overt statement of aggression or defensiveness. Had Tia planned that following the war? Rush shrugged to himself as he scoured the grassy woodland floor for whatever he could find that he recognised; it wouldn’t surprise him, Tia had learned a great deal from the war with her sister, and would do whatever it took to make sure it never happened again.

Birds singing in the trees calmed Rush’s heart as he walked. There were plants and herbs galore, along with mushrooms and various fungi that he recognised from the pictures in the books, but due to his lack of knowledge of the written language, he couldn’t yet determine their efficacy. If he blundered around trying to treat Queenie, he could inadvertently end up killing her. One of the mushrooms he’d collected was a deep purple colour with orange stripes – disturbingly alien in appearance, and yet it appeared in several of the books he’d read in the library. Why hadn’t he asked Tia for more help in understanding what these were when he had the chance? Rush shook his head to himself angrily: it was pride, wasn’t it? Bloody pride of all things, and now look at him! Just when he needed that knowledge, his own stubbornness had put another life at risk. Gods, what a mess… Rush sighed and put the last of the plants into his pack.

Queenie closed her eyes and tried a weak smile upon his return,

“Hello. Have a nice wander in the woods?”

“Wonderful.” Rush muttered, laying out his haul.

“Hey Rushy, do you think your marefriend’s going to come looking for you?” She took a deep breath and gazed up at the sky, “She could come diving through the clouds at any minute and be all like, ‘Darling! Where have you been!’ I mean, as much as I’m enjoying every moment of our outdoor adventure, don’t you think we should stay put?”

Rush snorted, “Perhaps, but with timber wolves, no food and no shelter? You need help, Queenie, and I’m certain we’re near where we were working, even if the landscape’s has changed. After all, the river’s still there and I’ll be damned if I’m going to just sit here and hope for some sort of miraculous rescue. Rush stared at his laid out herbs, examining each one in turn.

“You fell out with her, didn’t you?” Queenie said, “She won’t be looking for you because you had a fight, is that what you’re thinking?”

Rush kept silent.

“I bloody well knew it…” Queenie groaned, “Bugger it, I was looking forward to being pampered at the palace too.”

Rush separated out the ingredients he knew from those he didn’t. Some were, rather surprisingly, the same as back on his old world. Others were distinctly peculiar, but may prove useful. He looked up at the white mare, drawing her attention back to the matter at hoof,

“Do you recognise any of these?”

Queenie sighed, “Only a few. The Lime green thing is ‘Elves Toenail’; you eat that and you’ll be dead in a few hours. The orange fungus gives you diarrhoea and the small pink flowers make you pee yourself – great fun if you want to have a laugh at somepony else’s expense. She stretched out, “Dunno about the rest, but then, I’m not a medic.”

“I thought you worked behind enemy lines?” Rush said, raising an eyebrow, “Didn’t they teach you anything about living off the land?”

Queenie clucked her tongue, “We had ponies with us who did, but most of us were just local guys and gals who were told to do what we could to fight back against the Legion. I guess they must have been fresh out of survival guides at the time.” She raised an eyebrow, “We can put a complaint in to the Princess when we get back if you like.”

Rush snorted, “Don’t be flippant.”

“Well don’t ask such bloody stupid questions then!” Queenie snapped, “Just…just…oh I don’t know! I don’t think anything you give me is going to make me feel any worse anyway. Just get on with whatever you’re doing.” She turned away and closed her eyes.

Rush rolled his eyes and made his selection. Taking them over to the side of the stream, he located a selection of stones and began grinding the herbs and other plants as his mother had shown him all those years ago. It wasn’t ideal, the conditions far from what he would normally like, but it would have to do. Eventually, satisfied with the results, Rush trotted back to Queenie and began setting up a small campfire. She shook her head in wonder as he worked,

“How did you learn to do that?” She asked, “I’ve never seen a pony get a fire going so quickly with just sticks and bark before.”

Rush shrugged, “It was something mother showed me. When you work with nature as a healer, you need to know how to start a fire.” He snorted, “Of course, I usually had tinder, but there’s more often than not everything you need nearby if you look carefully.”

“She must have been some mare…” Queenie said absently, “Who was she?”

“Mum?” Rush smiled, pausing to blow on the embers and encouraging the flames, “Her name was Willow. I don’t know what she did before she had me, other than…well…it doesn’t matter.” He shrugged, “She looked like me in colouring, but my blue eyes I got from my father, Silver Spark.”

“I like your eyes,” Queenie said quietly, “they…hang on…did you say Silver Spark?” Rush nodded. “The Silver Spark? The disgraced officer from the Royal Guard?”

Rush sighed, “Apparently.”

“Good Goddesses, Rush, that stallion was a legend in the army!” The mare exclaimed, suddenly animated, “He fought a minotaur assault single hoofed and held them up long enough for many of the young ones to withdraw…well, run away really, but if it wasn’t for him…” She shook her head in amazement, “Now I see it…you do have the same eyes.” She closed her eyes and smiled distantly, “What I wouldn’t have done to…” she shuddered, “And you’re his son?”

“Aye.”

“But then, that means your mother was the thief who stole the elements of harmony.” Queenie shook her mane and continued, “Bloody hell Rush, she nearly condemned us all.”

Rush froze. ‘Condemned’? He stared at Queenie, his blood running cold. Had his mother really stolen something so important?

“It was a box.” he said calmly. Rush checked the temperature of the water in the bowl and gave it stir, “A box with a key in it, not the actual elements of harmony. Tia never really told me much about what it opened, but I knew it was important.”

“Important?” Queenie stared at him in amazement, “The master of understatement strikes again.” She leaned back, “Celestia used them to blast Nightmare Moon into the moon, or something like that, and then she used them to wipe out the Legion. Zap! No more thestrals, no more minotaurs, and no more war.”

Rush sat back and adjusted the fire to lower the heat, “Did you see all that?” he asked.

“Well…not in so many words…” Queenie said with a shrug, “I was way up north at the time, but we all saw the flash of colour on the horizon and sort of ‘knew’, you know? Next thing you know, the thestrals were all running north back to their own world like the guardians of Tartarus were nipping at their balls.”

Rush shook his head slowly, “I never really asked what had happened to Tia’s sister.
I knew she’d become Nightmare Moon somehow, but ‘blasted to the moon’?”

Queenie nodded, emphasising her words, “Next time the moon is full, look carefully. You can see her – the mare in the moon.”

“Dear Gods…” Rush stared up at the sky and wondered at the strangeness, and frightening otherness of this world. He had so much to learn, and as exciting as a prospect as that was up to a point, it filled him equally with dread. Rush sniffed at the bubbling mixture in the bowl and tasted a little, nodding to himself.

“I’m glad you’re trying that first,” Queenie said with a snort, “you can poison yourself all you like.

“I’m not going to poison you, for goodness sake.” Rush sighed, “Just get it down you while I have a look at these cuts of yours.”

“Huh!” Queenie huffed, “You reject me and now you can’t keep your bloody hooves off me. Just…OW! Bloody hell!”

“Sorry.” Rush gritted his teeth; he’d barely touched her leg and it was causing her so much pain? It looked like the swelling was still up, and it was worryingly hot. Queenie was clearly running a fever and it was nothing short of a miracle that she was still lucid. He checked over her injuries; most of them were healing quickly, but one or two looked like they would need washing out again. He’d found some river salt on several of the rocks earlier which would come in handy for treating that, but it was going to hurt her to do it. First things first however, he needed to get her to drink the mixture; currently she was just staring at it suspiciously.

“There’s no way in Equestria I’m drinking that!” She said emphatically, “It smells like piss.”

Rush sat down next to her and looked her in the eye, “It will help bring the fever down, Queenie.”

She huffed, “I don’t care! Have you smelled it? You’re going to poison me, you lunatic!”

Rush face hoofed, “Fine, then don’t bother. I’ll leave you here and hopefully the timber wolves won’t eat you before I manage to find help.”

“Huh, I’ve been telling you to do that for ages.” She sniffed haughtily.

“For the love of the Gods,” Rush groaned, “Queenie, you’re really starting to piss me off! Now get that down your throat or…”

“Or what?”

Rush flung his forelegs up in exasperation, “Don’t you want to live? Do you actually want to die, is that it?”

Queenie huffed, “What do you know? Stupid soft flanked…Mmph!” The mare’s eyes went wide in shock as Rush clamped his mouth over hers, the bitter fluid seeping into her own. She struggled against him, trying to push him off, but she was so weak she was like a newborn foal. Struggling for air, finally she opened her mouth involuntarily, allowing the foul mixture to flood in and she unwillingly swallowed it in one gulp. Rush broke away, wiping his muzzle.

“You…you lousy rat!” Queenie spat, spitting out the last remnants of the mixture, “How dare you! How bloody dare you!”

Rush sat back by the fire, “When you’re better, you can take revenge if that’s what you want” he said calmly, sorting through the mushrooms, “If it gives you strength, Queenie, then embrace it. I’m not going anywhere without you, so get used to it.”

“You self-righteous, supercilious, overbearing…” she took a breath and bellowed out a deafening neigh, “If I wasn’t so sick I’d knock you bloody senseless!”

“Well then, getting better is something we both look forward to, isn’t it?” Rush replied.

“Luna’s hairy arse, you’re insufferable!” Queenie groused, “What the hell does Sun Butt see in you?”

Rush grinned innocently, “My soft flanks?”

“Argh!” Queenie covered her muzzle with her forelegs, “Shut up! Just…just bloody well shut up!”

“Yes, Your Majesty.”

Rush settle into making the nearest he could to soup. The mushrooms he’d picked he remembered from the books that, rather embarrassingly, had the most pictures. The ‘illustrated guide’ had apparently been more of a ‘beginner’s guide’, rather thoughtfully selected by the head maid - together with a copy of ‘Fiddlesticks Finds a Ball’, the cheeky old sod. The pictures in the book had certainly been amusing, and colourful too, far more than anything he’d ever seen growing up. Secretly, he would have loved something like that, but it had also been quite novel having Tia lying beside him on the bed while she taught him to read. He smiled to himself at the memory – Gods, he hoped she was alright. Queenie’s coughing fit made him look up in concern, but she waved him off,

“I’m okay.” She shook her head, wiping the sweat from her muzzle, “It’s that crap you made me drink.” Queenie sniffed, “Next time, try doing that without the poison?”

Rush snickered quietly, adding a pinch of fresh basil to the makeshift stewing pot; at least he recognised that one and it would do wonders to help the flavour. Unfortunately he could hear Queenie’s chest wheezing even over the sound of the fire crackling away. Being outside was healthy up to a point, but she needed to be warm and comfortable with good food, and that was something in short supply here. The least he could do was get some hot food into her. Rush took a taste and nodded; it would pass, barely.

“Here, it’s mushroom stew.” He moved up closer to her and held up the bowl. Queenie stared at it warily,

“Where’s yours?”

“I’ll make mine later.” Rush said, “There’s only one bowl, remember?”

Queenie sniffed, “Are you going to force that down my throat too?”

Although her smile suggested she meant the question to be taken in good humour, there was a suggestion of ‘consequences’ should he even think of attempting such a thing. Rush rolled his eyes,

“It’s just stew, made from local mushrooms and herbs I found. You need the energy for your body to mend itself and to warm you up inside.”

The white mare grinned, “You could do that just as well, you know.”

Rush groaned, “There’s something wrong with you, Queenie” he said shaking his head, “I’ve never met another woman like you.”

“Mare.”

Rush blinked, “Huh?”

“I’m a mare, not a woman.” Queenie said raising an eyebrow, “Is that what they call females where you lived?”

Rush nodded, “Yeah. Sometimes I slip back into my old way of talking and thinking.”

“Does it matter that much if you do?” She asked.

“I…” Rush stared at her a moment, “I don’t suppose it does. Not in the great scheme of things.”

“You said it yourself: you’ve not been in Equestria very long Rush, so give yourself a chance.” Queenie stared into the bowl, licking her lips, “Hey! Not bad! Then again, I suppose anything tastes good when you’re hungry.”

“Thanks for the compliment.” Rush said with a huff.

Queenie giggled, “You’re welcome.” She finished the last mouthful and passed the bowl back to Rush, “Come on, get yours on the go now; the bowls free.”

“I’ll do it shortly.” The stallion replied.

Queenie stared at him a while and narrowed her eyes, “Being a martyr now, are you?”

“What?” Rush asked, picking up the bowl.

“I mean, why aren’t you eating?” Queenie shook her mane and winced as she tried to shif herself into a more comfortable position on the litter, “You think that by starving yourself, we’ll have a better chance of survival do you?”

Rush sighed, “No. I just didn’t find enough for two, but I’ll try again later.” He saw the look on her face and raised a hoof in defence, “Honestly!”

“Hmph! Bloody stallions” Queenie said and shook her mane. Secretly, she smiled to herself; Rush was a good stallion, and one who was utterly selfless – so far as she knew. Anyway, how far could they be from civilisation now? The river can’t have washed them that far, could it? All they’d see so far were trees, trees, and more trees; plus the river of course, but why hadn’t they seen a logging camp? No camps, no towns, no nothing! She shuddered; it was like the end of life as she knew it, with just her and Rush as the last two ponies alive in Equestria. For a moment she wondered: what would it be like if they really were? What if it was just her and him, the two of them, alone in the wilderness? Suddenly she began to feel warmer inside, her eyes locking onto him: the way his mane hung down his neck, the slight twitch in his right ear - he probably didn’t even notice he did it, but she did. Whenever he was deep in thought, that ear would twitch just so. Queenie grinned to herself and sighed inwardly; he would make a splendid mate indeed. Bloody royalty, what did they know?

******************

Rush picked the last of the mushrooms and some of the ‘salad leaves’ as Queenie had called them, putting them into his satchel. She’d had some knowledge of field craft and survival after all, but as she’d pointed out, there’d been little time to train them in much more than combat tactics, so they’d simply taken ponies with them who knew how to live off the land. Rush could himself to a degree, but had still relied mostly on the sales of his reeds to pay for food and other necessities. He paused; Gods above, what he wouldn’t give for a cup of tea right now…

Back at the camp, he unloaded his supplies and checked on Queenie; she was uncomfortable still, and looked horribly thin, but at least her humour was still there, and she’d proven to be surprisingly good company too - once you got past all the sexual innuendo and flirting. Rush shrugged it off as he always did, but couldn’t help but feel a certain warmness towards her, despite…’that’. He sighed; he missed Tia horribly, and his friends: how was Grove? Mind? And what had happened to Straw, Pop Top and Rock? He’d heard screams and shouting before something had hit him and then… Gods, he’d be having nightmares about that for the rest of his life. Neither Queenie nor he had spoken about them much – what good would it do to speculate anyway? All they could do was pray for their safety, and hope they’d escaped the deadly floodwaters. What he really couldn’t understand though, was why it was taking so long to find other ponies. Surely there had to be somepony out here, and what about Tia? Wasn’t she looking for him either? He took a breath and sighed it out; maybe…maybe not… After all, there’s only so much somepony would put up with before they’d had enough, right? Rush felt a shudder run through him and set about making the evening meal. How many nights had this been now? The endless trudging, the evenings kept awake by strange noises in the woods and leaping at shadows was wearing him down both physically and mentally. Whether there were any timber wolves out there or not, he wasn’t sure, but it didn’t really matter either way – he wasn’t taking any chances. Unfortunately, night after night of barely any sleep had meant he was feeling increasingly fatigued and weakened.

“Queenie? How are you feeling?” Rush asked.

She looked up at him and tried a smiled, “Like crap. How about you?”

“Fighting fit” Rush smiled.

The white mare snorted, “You’re a poor liar, Rushy.” She sighed, “I still think you’re wasting your time, but…thanks.”

Rush shook his head, “You’re welcome.” He watched her for a moment and smiled, “Come on, eat up.”

“Let me guess, bran and oat muffins?”

“Not quite.” Rush said passing her the bowl.

“Oh Goddesses…” Queenie sniffed at the offering and shrugged helplessly, “You gotta love mushrooms.”

“I doubt you will when we get back to civilisation” Rush replied, taking a mouthful of his own meal, “I don’t want to see another lousy mushroom as long as I live.”

“Or wooden cutlery” Queenie observed, “everything has that lovely undercurrent of tree which I enjoy so much.” She chuckled, “Still, my compliments to the chef. Just don’t expect a tip anytime soon.”

“I’ll put it on account.” Rush grinned, raising an eyebrow.

The sun was going down now, and the sounds drifting from the woods were changing as the denizens of the night came out to take over from their sun loving counterparts. It was a strange and almost sudden shift from the songs that filled the heart with hope and joy, to ones that held a haunting, mystical quality, some of which sent chills down your spine. Rush blew on his forelegs to warm the up; Queenie’s voice was sounding rattly again, but at least she was warmer than she had been. Fortunately Rush had been able to craft several mats for them out of the plants he’d found in the wood and by the river. They weren’t the materials he was used to, but they were near enough to do the job. At the very least they would act as a barrier to keep the heat in and most of the bugs out. He had to smile though; Queenie looked like some strangely woven parcel with a head sticking out of the top. She’d commented on feeling like a sandwich several times already and clearly meant this as some sort of double entendre, but Rush simply professed ignorance - much to the mare’s annoyance. Still, she’d managed to settle down for the evening at last and was staring into the flames of the fire with a faraway wistful look. He knew something was coming, and sure enough…

“Rush?”

“Hmm?”

Queenie smiled distantly, “Have you…ever been in love?”

“Me?” Rush snorted, “I love Tia.”

Queenie shook her mane and snorted, “I know that! I mean…before, you know, in the human world.”

Now there was a question. Rush closed his eyes and listened to the fire crackling away in front of them. He shrugged, “Honestly? I don’t know. It was an arranged marriage; Lina and I barely knew each other before our parents decided on our pairing.” Rush shook his mane and poked the fire into life. “We had a daughter together, but …you could say we were like strangers living under the same roof.” He sighed sadly, “I always feel like I’m being cruel and heartless when I think like that, but I can’t see the point in trying to pretend I felt something I didn’t. I don’t think they would think any better of me for lying.”

Queenie was watching him intently, “What happened to them?” she asked.

Rush snorted, “They were kidnapped by a gang of bandits: ex-army, dispossessed warriors, or just thugs,” he shrugged, “who knows what they really were. It used to happen a lot, especially in remote areas, and women and girls were the usual targets. Men and boys were generally left alone or killed if they tried to intervene.”

“What did they…” Queenie swallowed, “What did they do with them?”

Rush sniffed, “What do you think?” He lifted the water from the fire and sipped the dark coloured concoction. ‘Tea’ it certainly wasn’t, but it was passable as something they could drink, and it was hot at least. He passed a rough wooden bowl of it to Queenie, “The bandits had a way of indoctrinating their captives. We all knew it, we’d seen it in other villages, and we all thought ‘it won’t happen to us, we’re too remote. We don’t have anything they want’.” Rush sighed, “How damned naïve we were.” He looked up at Queenie, “I searched for them: from the mountains to the coast, from village to village, town to town, until I tracked them to the outskirts of a village not far from our own. We were staying there when word came that the bandits had hit another village, killing their elder and taking more girls.” Rush closed his eyes, recalling the details, one horrible scene at a time, “Cray was a damned good tracker, and with some of the retired soldiers from the village, we tracked them to their camp in a small valley at the foot of the mountains.”

“They were still with the bandits?” Queenie asked.

Rush nodded, “I can only guess it was drugs, or maybe some sort of indoctrination process they went through…” He shrugged, “I don’t know, Queenie, I’ve asked myself that question time and time again; I just don’t know. But…they attacked us. We tried to be stealthy, to try and get the girls out of there, but one of them stood on something, or someone, and the next thing we knew was all hell had broken loose. We’d got most of the girls out but the bandits were on us like a wave breaking on the shore.” He shook his head, “I’ve rarely seen such brutal and careless aggression: they just…ran at us…screaming.” Rush stared at the ground, squeezing his eyes shut against the emotion that threatened to sweep him away, “Eventually there were just two left, two of them surrounded by villagers bent on revenge. I don’t know whether Lina was in her right mind or not, but she came at me with a spear and…and tried to spit me on it. The Gods know, I lowered my sword, I tried to reason with her, but she opened my side up like a ripe fruit before Cherry came at me to finish the job. Before I knew it, I’d…reacted…and they…and they were both just lying there.” Rush shook his head slowly, “I remember the look in Cherry’s eyes, the words she said as she seemed to fully recognise me in her last moments…” he felt a shiver run through his body and the sting of tears in his eyes, “I see her sometimes, Queenie, in my dreams…looking at me, her own father, as I stand over her with my daughters blood on my sword.” Rush rubbed his muzzle and took a sip of his tea, “There are some things nobody…no pony…should ever have to do, or see.”

“Oh, Rush, I’m so sorry.”

Rush shrugged, “You didn’t know them, but…thanks.” He looked up at her over the steaming bowl, “What about you? How did you come to be in the ‘special forces’, or whatever they were?”

The mare tossed her ebony mane and raised an eyebrow, “Interested in me now, eh?”

Rush smiled, “Fair’s fair.”

Queenie snorted, “Yeah…” She sipped her tea, “Not bad. Could do with sugar though.” She leaned back in the litter and rubbed her shoulder with a sigh, “I had a coltfriend, Valance - just a boy from the country. He was nothing special to look at, just your usual farm hoof. He had a sort of washed out purplish coloured coat, lilac mane and these big pale green eyes.” She smiled distantly, “He was a bit of bumpkin really, but then, when you work the land you don’t really need anything fancy like ‘education’ do you?” She chuckled, “He couldn’t add two and two together, but by Luna’s arse, he knew how to bring life from barren earth and rock. Honestly, I could swear that boy had a sort of magic all of his own.” Queenie groaned, rolling her shoulders, “One day, a young mare walked into his life to buy some of strawberries, and…well, you can probably guess what happened next.”

Rush chuckled at the sheepish look on her face.

“We fell in love.” she continued, “Absolutely, hopelessly, head over hooves for one another. I would take every opportunity I could to visit him, and mum was all too happy to let me for all the freebies I would come back with.” She smiled distantly, staring into the flickering flames of the fire, “And soon, we had our first foal, Cardamom.” She took a breath, “Valance wanted to get married, but me? No…no, for some bloody stupid reason I didn’t want to” She wiped her muzzle and took a ragged breath, “No, I…I thought that I wanted to be free, free and unfettered by anypony. Even with a foal, there was always mum to look after her, and I could dash off into the town and dance the night away with whomever I pleased, leaving Cardamom with mum or Valance while I ran wild.” Queenie shook her head, “I thought that Valance and I had something special, and…and we did, but I was so young, and so damned foolish, that I thought I could have it all: Valance, Cardamom and my happy go lucky life.” She lay back and stared up at the stars, “They say you don’t know what you’ve got until it’s gone, Rush, you know?”

“I’ve heard that.” Rush replied quietly.

Queenie nodded, “It’s true.” She looked him in the eyes, “One day I came home from a night out and mum was sat there with a note from Valance’s parents. It was…it was from him, telling me he’d joined the Celestian army to ‘protect our future and our home’.” She took a breath and laughed bitterly, “He never came home.”

“Queenie, I’m sorry.” Rush said gently.

The white mare shrugged, “I joined up you know, to look for him? I never found him, and I never found out what happened to him either. The army just…they just told me his patrol had gone out and hadn’t come back - just like that.” She snorted, “A statistic, that was all: you’re alive, you’re dead, here today and replaced tomorrow, dead on some forgotten speck of ground as food for crows and worms.”

Rush lifted a hoof, “Queenie…”

She brushed Rush’s concerns aside, “I was given ‘special dispensation’ to take the news of his death to his parents. That was when I found the Legion had beaten me to it.” Queenie wiped a stray tear aside, the dampness on her fur glistening in the firelight, “They’d wiped out the farm completely, killing Valance’s parents….before moving onto the rest of the village.” She squeezed her eyes shut, “They spared nopony, Rush…not even my daughter.”

Rush didn’t know what to say; ‘sorry’ seemed so meaningless. He cleared his throat, “Queenie…didn’t the Legion take prisoners? Why would they do something like that?”

“Why?” She threw a stick onto the fire and spat on the ground, “Because the strong prey on the weak, Rush. You said it yourself, that your people kept Equines as slaves; they were weaker, less intelligent, and so pressed into servitude. If they weren’t fit enough for service, or didn’t bend to their masters will, what would happen to them?”

Rush said nothing.

“The Legion took prisoners alright,” Queenie continued, “but if any resisted…” she drew her hoof across her throat, “it was goodnight Equestria.”

“Did the village fight the Legion?” Rush asked, “Is that why they killed everypony?”

Queenie shrugged, “Probably. There was sign of a battle.” She snorted, “Those crazy bastards probably thought they could stop the Legion.” Queenie closed her eyes and smiled bitterly, “My daughter paid the price for that insanity.”

“But you fought back.” Rush replied, “You fought for your home, and for them.”

“I suppose.” Queenie said absently, “From then on I just sort of threw everything away, you know? All my ties, all my possessions – everything; I wanted to live in the moment, to live right on the edge, to take life by the balls and hang on kicking and screaming until one of those black monsters sent me to the herd.” She nickered, “Never got me though…never got me…”

“No.” Rush lifted her hoof and gave it a rub, “The world needs ponies like you, Queenie. You’re strong, stronger than I could ever be.”

“Ha!” Queenie snorted, wiping her eyes, “You’re a stallion, of course you couldn’t be as strong as me!” Her eyes sparkled in the fires flickering light and made Rush’s heart jump slightly. He wasn’t used to female company, other than Tia of course, and even then he hadn’t really known her that long, had he? Rush looked down at his hooves and turned away, staring into the fire. Queenie lay a hoof on his back,

“Rush? Are you alright?”

“Mmm” The brown stallion took a deep breath and sat on his haunches trying to keep his emotions under control, “Yeah. I’m fine.”

Queenie gazed into the fire, watching the sparks floating up into the evening sky, “You know, when I first met you, I thought you were a real stiff - a pony who had a rod up his arse – that sort.”

“Oh, thanks!” Rush chuckled.

The white mare shook her head, “No, Rush, listen, I…I just wanted to say…thanks.” She cleared her throat, “I mean…thanks for helping me and all, but…thanks for, you know, being there.” Queenie groaned, “Look, I’m not that good with words. What I’m trying to say is thanks for listening to me and…being my friend.”

Rush smiled, “Friends help each other, Queenie.” He stretched his forelegs and took in a deep breath, clearing his lungs and yawned, “I didn’t have many in the human world really – they were more of an annoyance to me than anything else: always wanting something, always needing something, and yet they were never there when I needed them. I think that’s when I realised that not everyone you think of as your friend really is. It sounds obvious I suppose, but it’s only when you need them, really need them, that you find out who your true friends are.” He nodded to himself, “They’re the ones to cherish.”

“Like Tia?” Queenie asked.

Rush shook his head, “Tia’s different. It was through her that I found out who my friends were in the village and, well, she showed me that my life wasn’t as pointless as I thought and that I meant something to somebody, rather than just being yet another human born into a world that didn’t care whether I lived or died.” He snorted, “I used to think it strange that everyone used to be so protective of the young - so caring and doting, and then eventually lose all interest in them. I often pondered about that, about where that point was in a person’s life where they simply didn’t matter to society anymore.” He sighed, “You just fade into the background - another nobody, another face in the crowd that nobody would miss.”

“Don’t you think you over-think things a bit?” Queenie asked, “Like, maybe there isn’t any real meaning to us being here to begin with, and that we’re just the product of a bit of rutting between our parents?” Rush cringed inwardly, making Queenie roll her eyes. “Seriously, Rush” she continued, “I mean, out you come into the world, all bright eyed and swishing tail, and everyponies like ‘Ooh look at the cute foal’ and then they simply move on to the next interesting new thing. Ponies get bored, Rush, the new becomes the familiar and-”

“-Familiarity breeds contempt?” Rush finished.

“Exactly!” Queenie nodded, “The way I look at it, is that you should just roll with it. Tell the world to go buck itself and carve out a piece for yourself regardless. Take me for example: I lost everypony I ever loved, and so I joined the army.”

“To forget?” Rush asked.

Queenie shook her head, “To die.”

Rush’s eyes went wide, “Wha-”

The mare held up her hoof, “At first I just wanted to be with my daughter, to go to the herd as quickly as I could so we could be together again.” She smiled, “But…one day, I was just sitting there by the fire in the woods getting ready for the next mission, and…and I began to think about how many lives we’d taken, how many we’d lost, and what it was all for. I don’t know why, but suddenly everything seemed to feel so wrong, so futile, and I started second guessing what we were doing.” Queenie shrugged her shoulders, “That’s when I realised I was getting old.”

“You’re far from old!” Rush said raising a hoof.

Queenie stuck her tongue out at him cheekily, “I hope not! But still, it doesn’t help when you’re supposed to be this emotionless killing machine for the Princess and you start questioning your purpose.” She shook her head, “I…I saw something once too, something that…”

Rush shook his head and moved closer to her, “Queenie you don’t have to tell me…”

“No! I…I never told anypony before! I…” Queenie covered her face with her foreleg, “It was in a village - a town really. We’d been sent there to destroy a supply dump of magical explosive which the Legion used, and we…” She took a shaky breath, the next words coming out in a hushed tone, “We did our duty.” Queenie paused, closed her eyes and wiped her muzzle, “Some of the barrels, they...they landed in the town itself, and the place went up like a…like a bonfire.” She stared at Rush, “Have you ever heard foals screaming, Rush? It’s a sound I’ll never forget.” She looked away, “Never…”

Rush lifted a hoof, “You couldn’t have known, Queenie, that could have-”

“It was only after the war,” Queenie cut in, “we found out that some of those barrels had set fire to the town’s hospital, and many never made it out alive.” She began to shake, “We murdered our own people, Rush…we burned them alive in their beds…” Tears flowed down Queenie’s face, “Do you know the best part? Do you want to know? The bloody thestrals, those Legion monsters we’d done our best to blow to bits, just ignored us and went to help save ponies from the fires, while we ran away…” Queenie’s sobs were muffled by Rush as he pulled the distraught mare into his chest. “We left them to die, Rush…we left them to die.” Queenie reached round Rush’s chest and cried out her heart into his warm fur, “Sometimes, sometimes I think…we were the monsters and…and that my baby won’t ever want to see me again. Who would want a murderer as a mother? Who…who would…”

“Shhh…” Rush cooed, rocking Queenie back and forth, “It’s alright now, it’s alright…”

War; it made murderers of everyone, regardless of whether you were human or equestrian - it was always the innocent who suffered the most. Rush held Queenie as she cried, feeling a flood of emotion burning through him - a reminder of the horrors he had seen himself when he was younger. They were images he would never forget, and even now, he would sometimes wake in the middle of the night in a sweat remembering, simply…remembering. Rush closed his eyes and shared a moment with the white mare, sharing their grief and their sadness at what their worlds had brought them. It wasn’t right, it had never been right, and yet they had survived where others hadn’t been as fortunate. Rush had often pondered, there in the wooden house in the bamboo forest, whether he’d had a choice, whether he could have just walked away; but he hadn’t, had he? The Lord of the land had ordered them to take up arms and off he’d gone, unquestioning, obedient – just like the rest of them…like lambs to the slaughter. Damn them, damn the bloody ‘nobility’ - every last one of them.

Queenie’s voice was faint and full of long buried sorrow,

“You know…don’t you? You know what it was like…”

Rush nodded slowly, “We’ll see our loved ones again one day, Queenie, and they’ll understand, they’ll see the love we hold for them in our hearts.” He smiled, “You won’t need words to tell them though; they’ll already know.”

“Mmhmm…” Queenie sniffed away a tear and gently moved away from Rush, casting her gaze up at him, “Thanks.”

Rush smiled, “Come on, let’s have another cup of tea and get some sleep.”

The evening wore on, the two lying side by side, watching the fire flicker and glow in the dying light.

Comments

[ArceusFan493]

Beyond "Civili"Z"ation?

[Fallen Knight]

Rush snorted, “Perhaps, but with timber wolves, no food and no shelter? You need help, Queenie, and I’m certain we’re near where we were working, even if the landscape’s has changed. After all, the river’s still there and I’ll be damned if I’m going to just sit here and hope for some sort of miraculous rescue.” Rush stared at his laid out herbs, examining each one in turn.

Missing a ” , bold-ed where it should be.