• Published 15th Sep 2018
  • 690 Views, 21 Comments

High School Teaching Misadventures - Even Evil Has Standards



A history teacher slash soul can unwittingly takes a job at an all female high school.

  • ...
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School starts at last

Louis stared for a moment to let Vortech's words sink in. "A Foundation Element?"

"You know, items from certain universes I gathered together at Foundation Prime in my bid to rule the multiverse."

"I remember. And the One Ring--I know that's one of them--is here?"

"Yes!"

"And you're sure of this?"

"Louis, I know a Foundation Element is near when I feel the vibrations."

Louis could tell Vortech was being serious because he hardly (if ever) called him by his first name. "Well...what do you want me to do?"

"Steal it."

"What?! Why?!"

"Because you won't be given it."

"But Obsidian will flail me alive if she catches me with it, and that's her being nice!"

"Ugh! Fine! We'll just steal it some other time!"

Louis shook his head, then dialed home. "Hey Emerald."

"Sorry Boss, but Emerald can't come to the phone right now. She's in the shower."

"Peridot," sighed Louis, "you didn't tie and gag her, did you?"

"Honestly and truly didn't, Boss." Louis could hear the sound of running water.

"OK, I'll give you that. But can you come at get here?"

"Sure thing, Boss. I'll just leave a note for sis and pop right on over to the school before you can sing the entire Green with Envy Blues."

"Uh, about that Peridot, I'm not at the school anymore."

"What? Then where are you?" Louis could hear the smugness in her voice as she asked, "Are you planning a one night stand?"

"No...you know about Minas Morgul, right?"

"I know that you compare it that rat's nest Obsidian's holed up in."

"And you know I started calling her place that?"

"Yeah so?"

"Well, that's where I am." Louis could hear a noise that suggested Peridot was spitting out a drink.

"Boss, are you crazy?! What possessed you to go there?"

"It wasn't my idea. The school dean thought I should move out of Everfree Row and zapped me out of the school and one of her friends picked me up. I'd thought I'd show her how happy I was with you two, but we passed here and-

"Wait, Obsidian's place isn't on the way here."

That got Louis good. Why would Gleaming stop by Obsidian's castle if it wasn't on the way to his house? "I don't think she was told my adress. Come to think of it, I don't think any staff members have my adress."

"That's probably a good thing, Boss. Any female that had your adress would be coming over here for a rocking and a rolling on their railway tonight."

"And get their goose cooked," sniggered Louis.

Peridot sniggered too before answering, "In all seriousness Boss, I will be coming over. I just hope Emerald will be able to restrain herself when she reads my note. You know how she is about you."

Louis could understand. Like Cadance and Gleaming, Emerald would probably jump to conclusions once she heard that her Master was in the home of The Dreaded incarnate. "Just get over here, Peridot."

"Sure Boss."

With that done, Louis set out to look for Obsidian. He got lost a few times and eventually came across Gothmog dragging Greta and Gleaming out of the cell block. It was obvious that he was having trouble, considering that Obsidian had inadvertently modeled him after the "elephant orc" as his namesake is known by his own creator. "Need any help?" asked Louis.

"I don't need any help," snapped Gothmog "or your pity for that matter!"

"Alright, fine," Louis raised his hands, somewhat annoyed. "Why do you have them out, anyway?"

"Her Ladyship requires their presence," growled the orc. Gleaming began to struggle at these words, forcing Gothmog to drop their ropes, limp over to the unicorn, draw a flail, and wack it against her bare back a few times. "She was going to let her go unscathed, but since she resisted, she'll be parting with a few marks."

Louis winced with each wack, then said quickly, "I'll go tell her you're on your way, shall I?" With that, he took off before the orc could get a word in.


Louis found Obsidian sitting at a table in what was probably the dining room. "Just thought I'd tell you, I passed Gothmog with the ladies on the way here."

"He turned you down after you offered to help, I presume?"

Louis blinked, then said, "yes he did."

"He is quite loyal to me. It makes sense because I created him, but he does get overzealous at times," she sighed.

Speak of the devil and he appears: Gothmog limped in, dragging the two behind him. He brought them over to the table and forced them into sitting positions onto chairs. Obsidian turned to Louis. "I am going to turn the unicorn over to her friend for a hefty price," she explained. Then her tone turned cold. "If you help her put one over on me-"

"I won't, I won't, I promise," Louis hastily assured her. "Geez, she has a way of making you wish you would die just by talking to you."

Obsidian's glare melted into a mischievous one. "After which, I'll be having a 'session' with the griffoness. I'd invite you, as she told me that gave her a pleasant night," Greta blushed, "but we wouldn't want to get your green friends irate."

Louis went redder than Greta, then coughed out, "Speaking of that, Peridot will be over here to pick me up. Emerald might be here after I leave."

"Ah Emerald. She used to be such a warrior back then. Then she met you." Louis didn't know how to comment on that one. "But no worries, I'll send her to you gift wrapped."

"Thanks?"

"In the meantime, tell me how you came by the name Gothmog."


Time passed as Louis pulled out his phone and showed Obsidian the profiles of not only the orcs, but the entire world of John Tolkien. What intrigued her the most was her inspiration: the Witch King of Angmar. Louis wasn't altogether surprised about this, as he could see similarities between the two. Just then, the doorbell--yes there was a doorbell--rang loudly, startling Louis, Greta, and Gleaming to the floor. "Go see who it is, Gothmog," ordered Obsidian.

"Yes, Your Ladyship." As he limped away, Louis turned to help the other two up. Greta averted her eyes by burying her red face into Louis' chest. Louis' face, which had just returned to its normal shade, was back to the scarlet hue of embarrassment.

Obsidian let out an uncharacteristic giggle. "I think she has a crush on you." Louis could only stutter while it felt like Greta had frozen in his arms.

There was the sound of a throat being cleared and everyone turned to see Peridot standing in the hallway dressed in baggy pants and a shirt that was to big for her, possibly because it showed her cleavage. Gothmog limped in. "Your Ladyship, this dragoness, she-"

"That will do, Gothmog," interrupted Obsidian. "She is here to pick up our guest." Her mischievous grin returned. "I don't suppose you'd consider buying the griffoness? The unicorn might make the 'session' worthwhile."

Gleaming began to thrash about...if you could call it thrashing. She was so wore out that all it was was a little shake. Obsidian chuckled at her antics, Gothmog looked nonplussed, and Peridot was studying Louis and Greta. After Louis let go of her, left the room. "Coming Peridot?" he asked her as he passed her.

"In a minute Boss," responded Peridot, "there's something I need to clear up." Not bothering to hear Louis' footsteps, she marched over to Greta, summoned her guandao-

Out of her pants?

Oh.

-and thrusted it at Greta's abdomen, growling, "I am hoping that you are instated in the Boss' harem. We could have so much fun."

"Oh for crying out loud." Peridot yelped when she felt a yank on her tail; Louis was dragging her out by the tail. "Come on, you scared her enough."

After they left, Obsidian turned to Greta with leacherous grin. "Yes, so much fun." Greta whimpered.


"Do you have to do that to everyone we meet?"

"I don't do that to everyone we meet, Boss," protested Peridot, "just certain creatures."

"Like your sister?"

"Hey now. I only do that to her because we're sisters."

Louis gave her a skeptical look. "And you wouldn't treat her the same way if you weren't?"

Peridot started to retort...then said grudgingly, "You have a point, Boss."

Louis placed his hand on his forehead. "Am I having to start leaving you on the couch every night?"

"Oh please don't Boss! My wrists and ankles can't take it! Not to mention estrus!" Peridot shuddered at the last part.

Louis sighed. "Then you and Emerald will have to stop threatening each other and everyone that either trespasses or because you feel like it." Just then, they spotted a green streak soaring across the sky. "I guess Emerald found your note."

"Yeah. Obsidian does know she's heading her way, doesn't she Boss?"

"I told her that Emerald might be there after I left with you. She promised to send her back gift wrapped."

Peridot looked stunned. "Just like that?"

"Yeah why?"

Peridot looked more serious than when Jasper and Malachite showed up at their house. "Because Obsidian wouldn't give something back to you for free Boss. She'd order a trade." Then her eyes widened. "What if she knows about the two shards you have? She might release Emerald for the shards!"

"But no one else knows that I have those shards except you, Emerald, and...uh oh."

"What is it Boss?"

"Emerald and I may have told Beauty Brass about the Gem Dragonesses and their shards."

"You don't think she blabbed, do you Boss?"

"I don't know," answered Louis.

"Well I'm not taking any chances Boss," growled Peridot, "I'm dropping you off at home, then I'm finding that pony and asking if she told anyone else what you and sis stupidly told her."

"Hey!"

"Sorry Boss, but you have to admit that telling someone that you just met about your deepest secret is kind of the wrong step forwards."

Louis had to admit that she had a point, but didn't dwell on it when they found Emerald's cutlass and machete implanted in the ground crossbones style, with a rolled up piece of paper held up by a string tied to each hilt. He untied and unrolled it, read it, then passed it to Peridot who also read it. "Are you serious?!" she demanded, throwing the paper on the ground. "That's all she asks for?!"

Louis had went inside and returned with all 3 LOTR movies (the ones by Peter Jackson anyway) and said, "Well, you did say that she usually gives things for a price, i.e trading."

"Yeah, but...but...she...," spluttered Peridot.

"Look, let's just deliver these to Obsidian and she'll let Emerald go."

"Fine," grumbled Peridot.


So Louis and Peridot had to go back to Obsidian's hideout with the movies in tow. When they got there, Peridot rang the doorbell and it let out the same loud noise, causing Louis to jump behind and squeeze her.

"Ooh," she moaned. Louis' arms flailed, reaching out to get the movies as they fell. It was only after he caught all 3 of them did he hear Peridot gasping and start to realize what he had been doing. "Nice groping Boss."

Before Louis could correct himself, the door was opened by a different orc. He was jet black, looked younger the Gothmog and had some hair...or something close to it. "What are you doing?"

"Hugging!" answered Louis hastily.

"Yes, hugging," answered Peridot breathlessly.

The orc just shrugged and spoke into a large pipe phone (*snicker*), "The human is here with the item you requested and two others."

"Thank you Murgash. Show him to the dining room."

Once the three were there, Obsidian entered from another door with a large and long rope. "Come come!" she ordered in a voice that made Louis clutch Peridot's hand and yanked on the rope, pulling out a pair of bound hands that belong to a half naked Emerald with the other end of the rope wrapped around her muzzle. She let out a muffled yelp as she was forced to the floor. Obsidian just snorted, dragged her hostage across the floor, tied her end of the rope to a table leg, and sat down opposite Louis and Peridot. "Do you truly have it?" Louis placed the movies on the table. Obsidian raised an eyebrow. "Why did you bring two extras?"

"The movie you want is a sequel," explained Peridot, "it doesn't pay to read or watch something before a prequel."

"Unless said prequel is aired afterwards," added Louis.

Obsidian turned her to him, watching as he started to shrink under her gaze. "It's no secret that some think of me as a monster. But what most don't know is that I do believe in fair trade."

Louis and Peridot looked at each other, then looked at Obsidian as if to say "So?"

"So I can't trade one thing for 3 things. I had meant to keep this," she reached into the chest of her dress, "but I guess I can give it to you in exchange for one prequel." She pulled out a picture and placed on the table ib front of Louis. He reached for it, but Obsidian pulled a hunting crop out of her dress (PELVIC WOO!) and swatted his hand away. "Not until after the trade," she chided and slid it down her dress (*thud*). She then stroked her chin, thinking for a minute, then turned to the orc she called Murgash, "Bring in the griffoness."

"Yes, Your Ladyship," responded Murgash. He left and came back pushing a dolley with Greta strapped into place, wearing a straitjacket and a green ball gag.

He placed her next to Emerald, then stood behind Obsidian who said, "your green toy, the picture, and the griffoness for all 3 movies."

"Hmmm," growled Emerald at the words "green toy" which was kind of ironic as she wouldn't've (hey look a double contraction) mind "sex slave" which is probably worse.

Louis and Peridot huddled and made several whisper noises, before turning back and the former answering, "Yes."

"Good!" She snatched up the movies and passed them to Murgash. "Take these to my personal chamber." After he obliged she released Emerald and Greta, neither of whom wasted anytime charging at him.

"Oh Master!" cried Emerald as she reached out to him...only to be shoved aside by Greta, now clad in spring green bra and underwear, who barreled into him, buried her head into his chest, and began shaking like she was trying real hard not to cry. Louis just awkwardly patted her back and took her to the car. Emerald and Peridot looked at each other before turning to see Obsidian lugging a large bag in with her. "What in the world is that?" inquired Emerald.

"The griffoness' pay," answered the black dragoness. She slipped the photograph in with the money, then said. "Take it with you." The two just shrugged, then lugged then wages bag with them after the other two.


Emerald and Peridot found the human by the car with the griffoness sobbing into his chest. After they loaded up the back of the car, they turned to the pair. "What's up, Boss?" asked Peridot.

"Well, as it turns out, being a prostitute isn't all that easy when your boss is someone like Obsidian," explained Louis, "especially since she didn't give us the key to the ball gag." Greta lifted her head to show the green ball gag still fastened into her beak and and padlocked. She lowered her head back into Louis' chest, whimpering. "Come on," said Louis, "let's go home."


When they were all inside the house, i.e. the garage that was also the lower level of the house, Peridot got out a key and unlocked the ball gag. Greta clicked her beak a few times to regain feeling. Once she was done, she turned to Louis. "Thanks for getting me out of there. I was starting to think I was stuck there forever."

"How did you get mixed up in Obsidian's lot anyway?" asked Louis.

"After I left you, I stopped by an apartment in Diamond Dog territory." The other three winced. "Yeah, I found out the hard way how territorial they were."

"What did they do to you?" asked Emerald.

"They locked me up with the intent on making me work in their mines. I escaped, but they were close to the black dragon's castle. She found me, I explained I was looking for a job and she took me in."

Peridot didn't think Obsidian took her in that easily. "When you saw 'took you in...'"

Greta went red. "My clothes weren't exactly in top condition when she met me. She assumed I was a prostitute. I told her I was a rookie, and, well..."

"The rest speaks for itself?" guessed Louis.

Greta hung her head. "Yes."

Welp," said Peridot, putting an arm around the griffoness, "you're here now and no longer having to serve her, so we're good."

Greta was somewhat flabbergasted at being embraced by someone who nearly slit her throat, and looked at Louis confusedly. All he did was mouth "later." Before she knew what was happening, Greta found her arms linked with the two females and being frog marched up the stairs. Louis made to follow, but Emerald said, "Hold on Master. We have a surprise for you, so wait down here please." Louis did so, but he was still a little taken aback. He sat down on the couch and waited.


"So you really don't know how you're going to purloin that ring from her?"

"Like I've been trying to tell you, her place is practically a fortress."

While de ladies were upstairs getting their "surprise" ready, Louis had sat down on the couch in front of the TV. Vortech had decided that it was a good time to remind Louis of his other task; that is, constantly nag him about how he was going to do it. This involved a lot of repetitive questions and answers until Louis lost patience. "That is it! I am going to say this for the last time! I and my two drsgonesses cannot raid Obsidian's fortress for a ring! We'll be begging for life in prison! Now I'm going to pocket your soul can until I can trust you to not bring this up until we find someone who can do it!" With that, he yanked the piece off of his neck and pocketed it.

"~Oh Master~" sang Emerald's voice. Louis looked at the corner and stiffened as Emerald, Peridot and Greta appeared dressed in Ancient Greek apparel, Emerald clutching a bunch of grapes, Peridot a bunch of green grapes, and Greta a goblet of wine. "You like?" asked Emerald.

"Yes," said Louis, then glanced at Greta. "But how did you get her roped into this?"

Greta blushed and the other two giggled. "Kinda obvious, Boss, judging by the way she's been looking at ya." Now it was Louis' turn to blush, but he spent the remainder of the day with his female friends treating him like a sultan.


The alarm clock started ringing in all its clockwork glory, startling Louis out of a harem dream. He looked at the clock, then banged his fist on it, silencing it...although it was a bit of a magic clock, insofar that it would repair itself. He struggled to get up because Peridot had a strong grip. "Mmmm," she moaned, not opening her eyes, "Morning, Boss."

"Peridot," grumbled Louis, "I have to get up."

"Please, stay Boss," murmured Peridot.

"Can't Per, first day on the job."

Peridot groaned, but relented. Louis got up and out of bed, then went to the living room where Emerald was passed out on the couch. "Emerald, time to get up." Emerald murmured incoherently. "Emerald, it's time for school," said Louis which led to more incoherency.

"Boss." Louis turned to see Peridot's hand sticking out of the master bedroom, holding the emerald shard.

Wise to her, Louis took the shard and held it like a walkie-talkie. "Attention Emerald! Please vacate your resting spot for your assistance is required!" he shouted at it like a megaphone.

With a shriek, Emerald fell off of the couch, then lept to her feet and stood at attention like a military woman. "Yes ma'am!" she shouted. Then she remembered where she was and saw Louis looking a little startled. She blushed. "Oh Master! I...I uh..."

Louis looked like he wanted to comment on that, but decided against it. "Emerald, it's the first day on the job." Neither of them slowed down till they got to the car.


As much as he didn't want to, Louis picked up the piece on his way out. Vortech was oddly silent, but Louis chalked it up to meditation. The drive to the school wasn't as conversational, but Louis tried to make it not so. "So what do you and Peridot plan to do with Greta?"

"Well I, for one, plan to tell Greta the rules of the house...and maybe save her from Peridot."

"Does that include carrying her like a bride?" asked Louis. He may be a...cliche harem anime protagonist at times, but he could be snarky whenever he had the confidence.

"Very droll, Master," grumbled Emerald, though she couldn't fault him. With all the jokes she and her sister made at his expense, he had to fight back other than taping their muzzles. "In all seriousness, I am explaining things civilly and not coercing her with something sharp on her throat."

"You have a point," agreed Louis. Not much else was said until they reached the school when Louis remembered something as he got out of the car. "Oh Emerald, stop by Lapis' place on the way back after picking me up here. The paper concerning Greta is almost void."

"Yes Master," responded Emerald. "You know, now that we have a fourth member of our group, things are going to be a blast."

"You said it," agreed Louis. Eventually, they made it to the school. "Well, wish me luck."

"Good luck Master." Louis made his way to the front door where Celestia awaited him with look that was part sympathy, part weariness, part exasperation.

"Hello Mr. Terwilliker," she said in a voice that matched her looks.

"Hello ma'am," said Louis nervously.

"I heard about what happened to Gleaming. I am sorry that Cadance had put you through such antics."

"You aren't upset with me?" asked a flabbergasted Louis. "I mean, she is your niece and you are the principal, and--"

Celestia held up a hand while smiling depressingly. "I understand. We have had accusations of nepotism thrown at us. Rest assured, I had given her a lecture about overreacting, as well as given one to Gleaming, although that was unnecessary, considering her parents gave her another one." She gave a sad smile. "This isn't the first time Cadance has acted irrational. Back at home, she passed a law stating that any creature that came Equestria by crossing the border had to have rehab papers in case they were taking drugs."

"How'd that work go?" asked Louis.

"Major increase in the use of the deny--entry stamp. Other countries began accusing us of racism.”

"Because ponies abuse substances the least?" guessed Louis.

"Right in one. Now come in and get your uniform. One of the students tailored a masculine equivalent of our standard teacher apparel." Celestia escorted him to the teacher's lounge where said clothes were waiting.

Unfortunately, so was Chrysalis. As soon as she saw Louis, her eyes went half lidded. "Welcome back, stud," she purred. "Ready to tackle the furies?"

Celestia saved him from answering. "He is here right now to change into his uniform and will do so without your unnecessary sexual behavior."

Chrysalis pouted, but opened the door to the restroom. As Louis passed her to go in, she raised her hand with a lecherous grin...until her hand was coated in a golden glow. She turned and saw Celestia shaking her head with a glare. She sighed.

After Louis had changed and came out (putting his piece in a pocket), Celestia said, "I'll be taking you to the classroom. Luna refused to do so, Cadance is... busy, and I can't trust Chrysalis." She glared at the assistant Dean who just grinned.

"What's Cadance busy with?” asked Louis.

Celestia gave him a long look, as if debating whether to tell him or not, then said, "let's just say that she got more than a lecture yesterday." Louis decided to follow her to the classroom.

The hallways were once again filled with students heading for their classes or conversing, this time wearing the traditional white uniforms. Once they saw Louis with Celestia, the whispers returned, ranging from the obvious ("Oh look! He's back!") to sexually hopeful ("Is he poly or mono?") to just plain misandry (not even going to bother.) If Celestia heard any of the remarks about her and Louis being together, she didn't show that she had. Eventually they reached the classroom where 16 students sat in four rows of four desks.

The first student, starting the first row, was an ivory unicorn mare with moderate arctic blue eyes, a pale cerise mane and tail, and her uniform covered her E cups and had a patch of 3 sparkly blue stars sewn to it (yeah that was allowed.)

The second student was a light cornflower blue unicorn mare with sapphire eyes, a periwinkle mane and tail with a pigment blue streak, and a necklace of an hourglass resting on her E cups.

The third student was a very yellow unicorn mare with raspberry eyes,a cerulean mane, a tail with two different shades of cerulean, and had 3 pins close to her E cups, two light blue hearts and one light green one.

The fourth student that ended the first row was a light yellowish gray unicorn mare with purple eyes covered by glasses, an amaranth mane and tail with two tone purple highlights, and on her uniform close to her E cups were a crescent moon and 3 stars.

The fifth and sixth students to start the second row were, to Louis's amazement, Applejack and Rarity. The seventh student was a light grayish gold Pegasus mare with cyan eyes, a light grayish rose mane and tail, C cups, and 3 pink butterfly patches in her uniform.

The eighth student to end the second row was a pink earth pony mare with a poofy mane and tail that were a darker shade, cerulean eyes, D cups, and 3 patches on her shorts: two cerulean balloons underneath a yellow one.

The ninth student to start the third row was a light grayish mulberry unicorn mare with violet eyes, a dark sapphire blue mane and tail with purple and light raspberry streaks, and a pin close to her D cups, depicting a magenta star burst.

The tenth student was a light amber unicorn mare with cyan eyes darker than Seven's, an amaranth mane and tail with faded yellow streaks (because there is no way that's light apple green), and a pin near her E cops (or on, but that sounds kinda wrong), depicting a red and orange yin and yang esque sun with red and yellow rays.

The eleventh student was a lilac unicorn mare with Persian blue eyes, a purple and teal mane and tail, C cups, and a pin depicting a purple and white star with blue streams.

The twelfth student to end the third row was a really cyan dragoness with red eyes, wings that went from indigo to light Cobalt blue, phthalo spikes (Or horns?) that curved downward, and nothing to show on her uniform except for E cups, don't worry, they were covered.

The thirteenth student to start the last row was a cyan Pegasus mare with cerise eyes, a mane and tail the colors of the rainbow, D cups, and a necklace of a rainbow lightning bolt.

The fourteenth student was a light gamboge griffoness with a white head, light amber eyes surrounded by heliotrope, gamboge wings, dark amber talons, E cups, and, like Twelve, nothing to show on her uniform...apart from torn sleeves.

The fifteenth student was a mint green unicorn mare with sunglow eyes, a cyan mane and tail with white streaks, C cups, and a lyre pin on the collar.

The sixteenth and final student was a beige mare with artic blue eyes, a two-tone mane and tail of dark blue and light fuschia, C cups, and 3 patches of wrapped candy.

Naturally, Louis was apprehensive (scared with a college education) about being in a room with this many females. Granted, he had been to what Emerald and Peridot called "the Magic Gathering" [which was an ironic name because there was no magic at the Gem Dragoness gathering, unless you counted the Elemental Beryls, (more on those later)] and the hallways were just chock full of females. But in the case of the former, even Obsidian was bound to the GDC (Gem Dragoness Code) that stated

Any Gem Dragoness that has been claimed by a fight victor or a Shard Owner, or has claimed a toy, is to ensure that any other Gem Dragoness is that she is his/hers, and he/she is hers. Any creature with more than one Gem Dragoness will leave this duty in the hands of the first Gem Dragoness that he/she claimed/beat.

As for the latter, well, that was brief. 'Nuff said.

Anyhoo, the female students were either curious or suspicious of what a male was doing here. Celestia cleared her throat and said, "Good morning class. This is our new history teacher, Mr-"

"Louis?!" exclaimed Applejack and Rarity.

"Applejack, you know this dude?" asked Thirteen.

"Of course," said Applejack, "he buys apples from mah stand."

"He's also a customer of my parents' boutique," added Rarity.

"Well that's good," said Celestia, "although I ask that you refer to him as 'Mr. Terwilliker' from here on out."

"Yes ma'am," said the two.

"Now, I'm going to get Chrysalis so she can watch you all's progress."

"Why are you getting Chrysalis here?" demanded Nine. "You know my family and I don't trust her."

"Precisely Twilight," Celestia said her name. "You'll make sure that she doesn't...go overboard while she makes sure that none of you will assault Mr. Terwiliker out of misandry." Here she gave Four, Twelve, Fourteen, and Sixteen stern looks. They either looked nervous or defiant. "I'll be right back. You call roll in the meantime." she told Louis.

"Yes ma'am," said Louis. After she left, he went to the desk and studied the list on the clipboard. "Twinkleshine?"

"Here," called One.

"Minuette?"

"Here," called Two.

"Lemon Hearts?"

"Here," called Three.

"Moon Dancer?"

"Here," grumped Four.

"Applejack and Rarity, you have announced yourselves. Fluttershy?" There was a breathing noise from Seven's seat. "Fluttershy?" There was a slightly louder breathing noise, this time with inchorency. Louis had to walk to the second row so he could hear her properly. "Fluttershy?"

"Here," said Seven. She was speaking into a megaphone so her voice was magnified...to a normal volume.

"That's why she's called 'Fluttershy,'" peeped Eight.

Louis looked at her. "You, I take it, are Pinkie Pie?"

"Yep yep," she chirped.

Deciding to deal with her later, Louis proceeded down the list. "Twilight Sparkle?"

"Here," said Twilight, even more grumpier than Moon Dancer.

Louis didn't know what her problem was, but decided that to be another problem for later. "Sunset Shimmer?"

"Here," said Ten.

"Starlight Glimmer?"

"Here," said Eleven.

"Ember?"

"Here," said Twelve in a suspicious voice.

"Rainbow Dash?"

"Dude, if you can't tell which one is me, then you must be colorblind," snarked Thirteen.

"Oh great, the rebel," Louis mentally groaned. Reckoning she'd be trouble, Louis began dreading every class with her. "Gilda?" There was a growl from Fourteen. "I'll take that as a yes, then," he said hastily. "Lyra Heartstrings?"

"Here!" shrieked Fifteen.

Louis was more put off with this, because this wasn't a typical, lustful female...this was a fangirl. He shuddered, then finished roll call. "Bon Bon?"

"Here," said Sixteen with an annoyed look at Lyra.

Now that the roll call was taken care of, Louis had to give them the procedure. "Alright, now here's how things are going to work: we'll be doing the Second World War and possibly the Cold War. That is, if we all cooperate."

"We willing to, sir," said the students, though Gilda and Rainbow Dash's were more insincere.

Louis mentally sighed and said, "Now take out your books and turn to the chapter that starts with the end of the First World War."

"But why teach?" asked Rainbow Dash. "I get that it being called the First World War may have something to do with there being a Second World War, but how could it start there?"

Louis gave her a look. "That is why we are taking this class, Ms. Dash: to learn from our mistakes. That way, if we become world leaders, we won't make the same mistakes. Can you tell me which side of the war Germany was on?"

"The loser's side," she said smugly.

"Correct. Now I'm going to call on one of you at a time and you'll tell me the contents of the Treaty of Versailles that stated what Germany was suppose to do. Ember?"

"Germany had demilitarize the Rhinelands," she said grumpily, to which Louis wondered if dragons respected military power.

"Good. Gilda?"

"They weren't allowed to have an air force," she scowled. Louis didn't have to wonder why, because griffons loved flying.

"Yes. Sunset Shimmer?"

"They had to reduce their military to 100,000," answered Sunset, "kind of pointless for a country, isn't it?"

"Yes it is," agreed Louis, "can you tell me about their finances, Twilight?"

"They had to pay a fine of $800,000,000,000, nearly ruining their economy."

"Yes." Louis noticed a raised hand. "Yes Minuette?"

"Is it true that there was a law that said a British citizen was allowed to walk into Germany, pick out any denizen, and spank the hell out of him or her?"

After a long silence, Louis answered somewhat hesitantly, "No, but that would sum up how the Germans felt about the ordeal. Anyway, now Ms. Dash, can you tell me what side of the First World War Italy was on?"

"The loser's side, duh!" she said smugly.

"Incorrect," said Louis. "I wonder what her grades are. The loser's side they were on was the Second World War. They were on the winner's side in the First One." He drew a map of what the southern bit of Europe looked like in 1918. Then he drew a line around the southern bits of Austria-Hungary. "This is what Italy expected to get out of Austria-Hungary after the Central Powers lost, when in reality," he erased the line until there was enough to make a half circle, "this is what they actually got."

"Now that ain't fair," grumbled Applejack. "The Italians helped them Allied Powers, didn't they? So why should they get the small share of the loser territory?"

"That, Applejack, can be summed up as 'damn politics,'" said Louis.

"Isn't it rather uncouth for a teacher to use profanity?" asked Rarity.

"It is, but knowing Ms. Dash, you aren't in a position to ask, now are you, Ms. Rarity?" That got her. "Now about Japan..."


All in all, it went pretty well. After lecturing the students about Japan's pre-war antics, they then moved on to the agreement between Hitler and Mussolini, as well the appeasement. Here, Louis took out to red apples, one dark, the other with white highlights, put them on the desk, and called up Applejack and Rarity. The latter pointed to the red and white apple and said, "I want that thing."

"Y'all can't have that thing," said Applejack, but Rarity already held said apple, the farm pony sighed, "ok, you can have that thing but no more."

Rarity pointed at the dark red apple and said, "I want that thing."

"And repeat," said Louis. "Thank you girls, you may take your seats." It went on until Louis noticed the time. "Alright all, our time's up, so good bye, look at your books, and see you all tomorrow."

Since no one signed up for second hour history, Louis decided to head over to the teacher's lounge where he was surprised to see Fleetfoot there. When he asked what she was doing there, she said, "There were so few students in the second hour that Spitfire decided to handle it herself."

"Really? I'd have thought that there'd more students for second hour," said Louis.

"Originally, second hour was supposed to be free time, but some teachers, including the vice principal, were opposed to this, so there was a compromise and now, some classes are second while some aren't. It's not really the best system, but it's better than nothing."

Just then, there was a flash of light and Eris appeared, wrapping her arm around Louis and pulling him close to her chest. "Welcome back, Lou! Ida thunk after Cady's little stunt, you'd be hard pressed to come back here."

After praising the fact that Vortech wasn't in his mind, Louis was able to control his urges more, but that didn't stop the temperature from feeling like it was increasing. "Well, no. My housemates got me out that particular jam so we're all good."

"~Oh really?~" purred Eris. "I suppose you three had a good time in the sack."

"This is going to be a long break," thought Louis as Fleetfoot's wings started twitching.


As it turned out, there weren't any students for third hour history either. There were suppose to be a hippogriff, a yak, a changeling, and a dragoness, but they decided to drop out and be with their pony and griffon friends. So Louis called Emerald and she came, picked him up, and was surprisingly mum the whole way to home...then again, so was Louis after being in a building that was full of the opposite sex. When they arrived, she and Peridot had some unexpected news.

"We've been glowing. The gathering is at hand."

Author's Note:

Sorry I'm late. Writer's block was a nightmare on Elm Street. But to make up, here's a quote from someone who will be appearing much later.

"AND I'M NOT LISTENING!!!"

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