• Member Since 11th Mar, 2012
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GaPJaxie


Sequels1



Comments ( 180 )

Watch this story barnstorm its way into the feature box! Yay for more acting verse!

Goddamnit I kept misreading Barnstormer as Brainstormer for the entire fic and I'm still not sure weather or not it enhanced the entire experience..

Wow. Always good to see more from this universe, but I wasn't expecting something this deep. It especially hits home given how I have a physics degree coming in the mail next month and I'm scratching my head over what to do with it. (Thank goodness for that CS minor...)

In any case, another great installment. I do love how you interweave greater realism with an understated but still clearly present supernatural element, and the character work is exquisite as always. Definitely looking forward to the next one. Thank you for this.

Oh man, it's really weird to see this dynamic from another perspective.

Oh my God. Barnstormer is like, all of my old roommates at once. She is the proof that universals exist as real, physical objects, because she is the Universal Roommate.

Good to see Butter got some help :pinkiesad2:

"Pegasi warriors"
"Pegasus"?

"the interceptors cry of frustration"
"interceptors'"?

"against her side in the proper"
"sides"?

"and trembled a moment as her"
She was already starting to tremble at the end of the previous sentence. I suppose it works, but it sounds a bit awkward to me; sorry.

"was good, then there"
"was good; then there"?

"eye-contact"
"eye contact"?

"what’s wrong or do I have"
"wrong, or"?

"Boom, cutie mark for awesome with a side of jazz and I can buy alcohol underage."
...Huh. I wonder what the story behind that is?

"thirty-year old"
"thirty-year-old"?

"a deep breath and let it out"
"breath, and"?

"across the table nibble"
"nibbled"?

"her tone turned from firm, to harsh"
"tone turning from firm to"?

"rose, and came around"
"rose and"?

"“Maybe,” Barnstormer"
"Maybe."?

"She asked, emphasizing the pauses"
"she"?

"reached out, and pushed"
"out and"?

"laughed awkwardly, and held the"
"awkwardly and"?

"And bring the rest of the loaf"
"take"?

Oh, and I enjoyed the story, naturally. :)

7325164
"It especially hits home given how I have a physics degree coming in the mail next month and I'm scratching my head over what to do with it."
Yeah, bachelor's in physics and master's in Aerospace Systems Engineering over here, and neither's led to a job in the field for me yet.

7325290

All flaws corrected. You have a keen eye, sir. :twilightsheepish:

Glad you liked it!

Yeah, bachelor's in physics and master's in Aerospace Systems Engineering over here, and neither's led to a job in the field for me yet.

Holy crap, those are exactly the degrees that I got. And I'm looking for a job now! And it's awful!

Excellent as always. I'm really, really (coughhintcough) looking forward to reading about Pinkie's actress.

7325345

Yes, Pan Flash is next. I'm writing as fast as I can! :twilightsmile:

7325353
Not fast enough!! I demand entertainment!! RAWWWWWWRRR!!!

In all seriousness, take your time. I'm sure it will be extraordinary.

7325359

I can't take my time. I made a pledge that if I didn't finish Actingverse by Bronycon, people could pelt me with pushies and call me a diminutive literary horse.

I really love this series! I need to check the list and make sure I haven't missed any.

Life is not acting. Life goes on after the lights go off and everypony goes home, each to their own little slice of the world. It's just that some of us keep acting long after the cameras have gone dark, because that's all we know. We've become other characters as our artificial career proceeds along through real life, picking up a facial expression that fans love here, and learning how to saunter in a particular fashion here, adding them all to ourselves as if we were a hermit crab, attaching little spangles and bits to our shells even as we keep our true selves secluded away from others. After all, we live to be somebody else, somebody our fans love, somebody who only vaguely resembles ourselves until one day when we look back and find only the role, and the actor has long since faded into the shadows.

Then we become directors, and start all over again.
(What? It was in danger of becoming thoughtful. I fixed it.)

HORRAY!

Good to see Butter Up got some help. And now we see where Read It And Weep came from - Barnstormer must've been having a lot of fun in that episode where she was studying Wonderbolt history.

I see you're still teasing us about whether changelings are real...

7325398

It's not a tease! They aren't real. It's just a joke ponies tell because she has a distinctive cutie mark.

s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/30/3d/7c/303d7c1b25257ee0a07db26aa3409f06.jpg

Probably.

"And sometimes that ‘malfunction’ was in air-quotes, because more than one pegasus decided they were going to teach a lesson to these upstart m-word ponies who thought they could rise above their station.”

M-word …

… mud?

*gets flamed into oblivion by the Earth Pony Anti-Defamation League*

7325463

You're a pegasus, man! You can't say that word! Not even as a joke!

Wanderer D
Moderator

...and that's the last they saw of her.

kul

Thank you for continuing this series. This series is one of the first story that I read in this site, and it had been one of my favorite. You really had it going on with how you combine the elements of the fantasy world with ours, and I still fall in love with every reference.
If anything, with the latest EqG movie, The Friendship Games had it own blooper reels, would you ever thought about bringing your magic here into that franchise. I just think, a combination of those short scenes and your storytelling can be wonderful!

This series is one of the best things I've seen in years.

7325463
Meringue.

7325591

If anything, with the latest EqG movie, The Friendship Games had it own blooper reels, would you ever thought about bringing your magic here into that franchise. I just think, a combination of those short scenes and your storytelling can be wonderful!

Actingverse Equestria Girls blooper reel.

...yeah, I can do that.

7325596

Yay! I'm glad you liked it.

7325290

> Pegasi warriors"

> "Pegasus"?

In astronomy, pegasi is an adjective. In English, pegasi is also 1 of 2 plural forms of Pegasus (pegasi, pegasuses).

This is an amazing interpretation of what Rainbow's actor might be. A mix of Charlie Sheen and an all-around prodigy? I might have expected one of them maybe. Very intriguing indeed.

7325463 7325466 Or, coming from a unicorn, would the "m-word" be "muggle"? :raritydespair:

7325628

It's a running theme with Actingverse. All of the actors are just enough like their characters you can see it if you squint. But the differences are significant.

Wow, this story was bad. Like, really bad. You unironically wrote a Mary Sue whose only flaw is that she's too perfect, which is stressing her out? And you thought this was a good idea to play completely straight with absolutely zero remorse? I might have been able to sympathize with Barnstormer if she wasn't such a whiny, angsty teen complaining about how she's just not sure which of her three different and lucrative life choices she should pursue. The worst part is, she's aware she's coming off as ungrateful, but it seems like the author just didn't care that this made her unlikable.

Here's the thing, this could have worked if Barnstormer wasn't already so damn successful. If she wasn't living with all the opportunities already, her dilemma might have made sense. At this point in her life, however, to suddenly stress over which one she wants to stick with just comes off as grating. She's not sympathetic because she's not even relatable. It's also really hard to even tell what her issue even is, because it starts off with her worried about longevity in her career, but then switches to some nihilistic approach about history, and... Who cares? At this point I was skimming because of how far the narration slipped up its own ass.

You need to look at who you're writing, because this was a teenager. You wrote a teenager who somehow is a star athlete, a super genius, a successful actor, a great cook, drinks alcohol casually, and somehow does this with zero effort while lazing about in bed until noon. No one's going to buy that character—and you seemed aware of that, but still ran with it for some baffling reason.

I also just have to question what them being actors in the Friendship is Magic television show even had to do with the plot of this trainwreck? It literally doesn't matter to the story at all. It's almost like you could have removed that element entirely and the story wouldn't have been changed in the slightest—which really just means these are random OCs you're using to piggyback off the success of an earlier story you wrote, instead of actually relating that story to this one in any meaningful way. Most people would call that lazy writing, but I'm above that.

Next time try and pull your narrative's head out of its own ass, come up with a believable character that manages to appear someone relatable to the audience, and maybe try to connect your stories together better if that's a thing you're going to keep doing.

7325671

Wow, this story was bad. Like, really bad. You unironically wrote a Mary Sue whose only flaw is that she's too perfect, which is stressing her out? And you thought this was a good idea to play completely straight with absolutely zero remorse? I might have been able to sympathize with Barnstormer if she wasn't such a whiny, angsty teen complaining about how she's just not sure which of her three different and lucrative life choices she should pursue. The worst part is, she's aware she's coming off as ungrateful, but it seems like the author just didn't care that this made her unlikable.

I mean... yeah. She is literally an angsty overprivileged teen. It's a story about child actors. They're all whiny teenagers, except Butter Up, who is a whiny adult. They're just whiny in distinct ways.

Here's the thing, this could have worked if Barnstormer wasn't already so damn successful. If she wasn't living with all the opportunities already, her dilemma might have made sense. At this point in her life, however, to suddenly stress over which one she wants to stick with just comes off as grating. She's not sympathetic because she's not even relatable. It's also really hard to even tell what her issue even is, because it starts off with her worried about longevity in her career, but then switches to some nihilistic approach about history, and... Who cares? At this point I was skimming because of how far the narration slipped up its own ass.

You need to look at who you're writing, because this was a teenager. You wrote a teenager who somehow is a star athlete, a super genius, a successful actor, a great cook, drinks alcohol casually, and somehow does this with zero effort while lazing about in bed until noon. No one's going to buy that character—and you seemed aware of that, but still ran with it for some baffling reason.
I also just have to question what them being actors in the Friendship is Magic television show even had to do with the plot of this trainwreck? It literally doesn't matter to the story at all. It's almost like you could have removed that element entirely and the story wouldn't have been changed in the slightest—which really just means these are random OCs you're using to piggyback off the success of an earlier story you wrote, instead of actually relating that story to this one in any meaningful way. Most people would call that lazy writing, but I'm above that.

But not above implying it! A fine line. And as for the accusations of being a Mary Sue, she's based on a certain other actor athlete PHD successful writer sexiest man alive who is also an expert on film and drives fast cars.

Next time try and pull your narrative's head out of its own ass, come up with a believable character that manages to appear someone relatable to the audience, and maybe try to connect your stories together better if that's a thing you're going to keep doing.

pre05.deviantart.net/f09c/th/pre/f/2012/348/d/2/applebloom__haters_gonna_hate_by_wolf54321-d5o2h2w.jpg

7325658
It's not just that, though, at least in this case. I like how you basically started with Charlie Sheen (or maybe more Barney Stinson), and then went into a discussion on historic sociology and all those other things she actually does and does well.

kul

7325606
Im glad you intrested in that hehe. But well, you said that you want to finish these off before bronycon, so I guess these goes first before any blooper reel or sort to happen.
Anyhow, with Star Power remarks about her confusion about the design of these fictional species.. The Humanes? (am I pronouncing it right? I dont speak neighponese very well) Im very intrested about how'd you try to explain the style's history!

Majin Syeekoh
Story Approver

7325679 James Franco is also 38 years old.

This story would also be more believable if "Barnstormer" was also 38 years old.

7325671
*snorts* Well, at least your profile picture fits your post.

I honestly didn't see a Mary Sue in this story. That's not to say that Barnstormer might not be one, but if she is, so what? It's a good story and it does everything right with her character.
In my opinion she isn't, though. Yes, she is good at lots of stuff, but that doesn't mean that she can just achieve everything she wants. She wants to change the world for the better, and she's well aware that that might just not happen. She wants also wants to keep acting and she can't just do everything at once. A Mary Sue would just do it all and succeed, or at least confidently try to do that and have everything kind of work out anyway. Barnstormer isn't like that, to me, not in the context of this story.

7325695

Do bear in mind, we only have Barnstormer's description of how awesome she is. We don't actually know what her GPA is, or that she's an amazing actor, or that she has a nice ass. She says those things are true, but she also thinks she walks on water. So if it helps at all, you can feel free to call Barnstormer an unreliable narrator. Because she certainly is at that.

7325679
Yeah, you've made them whiny, but they're not likable. Which is an issue, because you're clearly trying to make them sympathetic. You're clearly trying to make people like them and care about their issues, but you're failing at that.

Doing something on purpose doesn't make it okay.

And as for the accusations of being a Mary Sue, she's based on a certain other actor athlete PHD successful writer sexiest man alive who is also an expert on film and drives fast cars.

Yeah, here's the thing, just because someone in real life does multiple things, doesn't mean you can just use that as an excuse for poor writing. James Franco is 38—not a teenager—meaning he's had time to practice all those things. And you're also confusing the idea of someone in real life with conveying a believable character. James Franco has been an adult for 20 years, working on these things longer than Barnstormer has been alive. You're trying to push your Mary Sue in 4000 words. You have to meet a certain suspension of disbelief, unless you honestly buy your own hype that much. In which case, I'll just start laughing now.

7325695

Ssh, you're ruining it.

Barnstormer is the kind of genetic lottery winner that i dislike irrationally. Probably jealousy.

Majin Syeekoh
Story Approver

7325705 I suppose that could be true, but the usual assumption given in fiction is that characters are usually telling the truth unless there's a strong reason to believe otherwise. I mean, we already have proof that she's swinging far above her weight intellectually, so I'm given no reason to disbelieve anything else the narrative asserts.

And what you've presented here is the equivalent of a TV Supergenius cranked up to 11.

There's a reason reality is unrealistic.

7325706
7325709

You two should kiss.

7325707

You should watch.

7325709

Ahem. But no, seriously. I hope you enjoyed. :twilightsmile:

7325726

I should do whatever I damn well please. Which in this case means I would watch, but not because you told me to, so nyah.

7325720

Well... yeah, but this is a case of write-what-you-know. While I suck at sports, and certainly cannot act (my ass is okay), I did I start my degree in Physics when I was twelve. 3.4 GPA. So when I decided to make Barnstormer a child prodigy, I just had her talk like I talked around that age and ran with it.

Certainly, she's more of a lottery winner than I am (I got some serious drawbacks too in the form of emotional and mental troubles), but those people do exist.

Majin Syeekoh
Story Approver

7325738 I mean, sure. There are examples of people like that in real life. It just doesn't really make for compelling fiction IMO when the character's main complaint is "oh my god I'm too good at everything" without a narrative reason to believe she isn't fully telling the truth.

I'm finding like, zero relevance to the fact that these ponies are actors. It's brought up, what, twice? Also, Barnstormer comes off as a tremendous Mary Sue, and because of that I can't relate to her or sympathise with her. Her only real problem is that she's too perfect, which isn't really a flaw. It's just annoying. Her stressing over the different career paths just comes off as obnoxious wangst, and I honestly couldn't tell what the point of the story was. It seems like you're trying to be philosophical for the sake of being philosophical, which was also a problem in Deep Cover. The story can't seem to get its priorities straight. Are we talking about making a hard decision, or trying not to be forgotten by history, or what?

Overall this is a forgettable story that tries way too hard to be 'deep' and 'meaningful'. Barnstormer is a complete Mary Sue, and Butter Up seems to be a completely different character than she was in her own story (which I haven't read in a while, so I could be wrong about that, but still).

7325738

I have a bit of a different complaint than the others here.

Barnstormer isn't Rainbow Dash -- but she does play her on TV.

Take teenage you and also apply 'into sports' and 'good at acting'. Now: Could this 'you' play Rainbow Dash on TV? No, not even a little bit.

I think you did teenage angst and uncertainty well here, but as you can see it's real hard for many people to actually connect with the Barnstormer in this story. She's also not doing the 'like Rainbow Dash but different' deal that you've had going in your series. Rainbow Dash as a character is an upstart on her way to greatness. Your Barnstormer trips over greatness in her sleep. I get that you want to do a 'child prodigy' character but this really did not turn out well. Most child prodigies have a hard time finding normal, but Barnstormer is too good to need normal.

7325738
Do they? Do they really?? I'm a firm believer that no one wins the lottery like that. Everything good is balanced by at least some bad. Take this person I know. She's really smart--like, aces most every class and hardly has to study, just gets things so easily. She's got a knack for arts and crafts--you know, creative stuff. Her family is really warm and loving and supportive, and they're borderline wealthy. She's been all over the world. And if you didn't know her during her bad times, you might miss that she has a boatload of medical issues and if not for years of extensive treatment (and hard work on her part, because her illnesses aren't ones easily managed with medications) she would not be able to go to college and to work. Some people think everything comes easy to her and are jealous of all her opportunities. And you, being a child prodigy--wow! That's amazing! But it sounds like you don't have it easy, either. I think Barnstormer, as you wrote her, is getting into the edge of her hard times. She seems to really want to change the world for the better; leave an impact, be remembered, or even better, make the world a better place--and she can't figure out how to balance those desires with doing the easy thing, the recommended thing, or the thing that makes her the most happy. She has all this going for her, but she's totally lost. In a way, things have been TOO good, and she doesn't know what to do because she hasn't learned. I liked this story a lot.

Well, I liked it.

7325304
Eccentric overeducated writers unite!

Number of jobs I've had in biomedical engineering: 0.

7325951

Oh god I've been freaking out about this.

7325951

Seriously you have no idea.

7325970
7325968
Clearly I need to change my user avatar to the Sword of Damocles.

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