• Published 15th Jun 2016
  • 4,479 Views, 16 Comments

Even If It Kills Me - nobody_in_particular



Twilight Sparkle finds Screwball, the daughter of chaos, trying to pull Discord's statue out of the Canterlot Gardens. She questions Screwball and finds out some surprising things she never knew about Discord.

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Hello, Twilight

Author's Note:

Hello, bronies and pegasisters. Sorry for my long absence, I was on a trip out of the state, but now I am back! It’s summer, so I’ll probably have a lot more time to write.

So I really wanted to do a story with Screwball and Discord if Fluttershy wasn’t the mother, and she was created by him, but nobody knows. I really enjoy reading stories for this headcanon, and all of them are way better written by wonderful authors that have way better skills than me (Browneyedbagel is best author…) This story takes place before Keep Calm and Flutter On, so somewhere between seasons 2 and 3. Enjoy!

Twilight Sparkle put down her book and stretched her limbs. It had been a long train ride so far, and there was still another half hour left. She turned her head to look out of her window. In the distance she could see the outline of Canterlot and Celestia’s castle.

The sun princess herself had invited Twilight over for a formal dinner, in honor of Twilight’s tenth year since she graduated from magic school. Twilight was going to stay at the castle during the night, using a guest bedroom.

Twilight gazed at the ponies they passed. Most of them had their muzzles in the air, in a fashion that looked like it could cause soreness or injury. She wondered how they could see their own two hooves in front of them.

The train Twilight had taken was not the usual Ponyville Express; it was the last ride of the day in an old, beat up train that was partially held together by duct tape and nails. She couldn’t be sure, but she thought maybe some of the seats were glued down. It was also very small, sure to make anypony permanently claustrophobic. It moved slowly, so slow, in fact, that you could hear the ratting of the loose nails. At first Twilight had been hesitant to board it, but she decided it was for the princess, her beloved mentor, so she went through with it.

Soon the train stopped in the middle of the city, where all the stores and places to eat were. Twilight sighed in relief that she could finally get out of the very small train and stretch her hooves. As she walked past the bus driver, she smiled politely. “Thank you very much.” Twilight said.

The old mare shrugged and said gruffly, “I’m just doing my job, kid.” The driver opened the doors and Twilight stepped out.

When she walked out, her nose was greeted with the smell of many good restaurants. The train had left her next to Restaurant Row, and, although it was tempting, Twilight forced herself not to go grab a bite to eat, even though she felt starved. Besides, dinner wouldn’t be in too long, anyway.

The purple unicorn checked her watch and saw that it was only about ten minutes until seven o’clock. Oh, no! She thought with a sinking felling. The train ride must have taken longer than usual. I only have ten minutes to get to Canterlot Castle!

Twilight galloped across the streets in the direction she believed was right. Storefronts, trees, and the ponies themselves were all multicolored blurs to Twilight. She couldn’t see it because of how fast she was going, but she was headed in the complete opposite direction of the castle. Many ponies gave her confused looks as she ran by them. Eventually she sat down to catch her breath. She felt a tap on her shoulder and she turned around to see at least six members of the Royal Guard, five of which were pulling a chariot with nopony in it.

Twilight inspected the guards. Usually they were all big, white or grey stallions, but one of them was different. He was much smaller, with an orange coat and blue hair. He was standing up as straight as he could, but he was still much shorter than the other guards. Twilight knew immediately that he was a rookie. A new guy.

“Miss Sparkle?” asked the one who had tapped her on the shoulder. “Princess Celestia has asked that we accompany you on your trip to the castle. “If we may,” he continued. “We were told to bring you in one of the Princess’s chariots.”

Twilight nodded. She would have responded vocally, but alas, there was simply not enough air in her system for that.

The guard helped Twilight up and got her in the chariot. She took heavy pants and she waited for her breathing to return to normal. The cold wind felt great against Twilight’s face. It was early summer and Canterlot had been struck with a heat wave. She hoped that Celestia’s castle was cooled off on the inside.

The trip took only 3 minutes with the six strong stallions, even though they were carrying a heavy load. They set Twilight down outside of the front castle doors.

Before the guards flew off, they saluted her. She smiled in return. None of the guards returned her smile, but she thought she saw the orange one blush slightly. They galloped off, most likely to put the chariot back where it belonged.

By now Twilight had regained most of her energy. In a frenzy she checked her watch. 6:59. she scrambled up the steps and knocked loudly on the wooden door. Celestia greeted her with a smile and a twinkle in her eyes. “Twilight Sparkle, my most faithful student. Such a pleasure to have you here with us tonight.”

Twilight gave her teacher a quick hug. “It’s nice to see you too, Princess.”

“Please, come inside. Dinner will be ready shortly.”

The regal alicorn held the door open with her magic, letting Twilight through. As soon as Twilight walked in she was met with a gust of cold air.

The inside of the castle was just as beautiful as always, with neatly woven tapestries and shiny, polished floors. On the ceiling there were large chandeliers with 3,000 small diamonds on each.

The two walked through many large halls and passed lots of doors until finally they reached a large dining room. There was a big mahogany table in the center, and oak chairs with soft, velvety pillows on the seats. An even bigger chandelier hung over their heads, composed of many different types of gems. On the table was a dark purple table cloth. The table was set nicely with wine glasses, knives, forks, spoons, saucers, and bowls.

Princess Luna stood by the table, waiting.

"Good evening, Luna." Twilight said with a slight bow.

"We thank thee for agreeing to eat dinner with us. It is our pleasure to have such a fine pony dine with us this day." Luna responded properly.

"Won't you please have a seat?" Celestia asked.

Twilight nodded and slid into a chair.

Dinner that night was fantastic. There always mashed potatoes, cooked carrots, corn, peas, beets, and soup. There was sparkling cider, too.

Twilight ate quickly, but slow enough that it could still be considered polite. It felt wonderful to have food in her stomach again after not eating anything all day.

She levitated a napkin over a d dabbed the sides of her mouth with it.

"If you're ready, Twilight, we have your bedroom ready for you. I can show you where it is." Celestia offered.

"Thank you, but I think I'm going to take a walk in the gardens before bed." Twilight said, not adding that she probably ate her weight in food and she had to walk off the pounds.

Celestia nodded kindly and exited the room with Luna close behind.

Twilight exited the castle and walked out to the Canterlot Gardens. The entrance was guarded by two soldiers. Neither of them said anything or even looked at her as she passed by.

The statues seemed eerie in the sunset. She walked past the labyrinth and shivered, thinking about the last time she had been within its walls.

Twilight stood in front of the entrance, as if contemplating if she should go inside or not. In truth, she was lost in her thoughts and memories of the last time she had to use the Elements of Harmony. She was brought out of her daze by a quiet sound that she could only describe as the sound of somepony who had just finished running a very long race.

She heard it coming from the edge of the Gardens, where the north side if the Everfree Forest was. She quickly trotted over when she heard the pony give out pained grunts.

Twilight hid behind a bush and peeked over the edge to see what had happened. Usually she wasn't this suspicious, but she could feel an unsettling feeling inside of her.

Twilight gasped at what she saw.

It was a little link filly, certainly no older than 12 years old, pulling Discord's statue. She had ropes tied around her front hooves and waist. The rope hooked around Discord’s midsection. Tears and sweat dripped down her dirt-streaked face. The ropes were almost cutting into her skin. Her eyes were endless purple spirals. She had poofy white and purple hair, and she wore a propeller hat.

Twilight was amazed that such a little filly could pull Discord so far, let alone his statue. She stood there watching for a minute before the reality sunk in: this filly was stealing Discord to bring him back again.

Twilight made the ropes disappear, making the filly fall forward. She ran over to the fallen filly. "You! What are you doing here?"

The filly weakly lifted her head. A look of panic appeared when she saw Twilight's face. “Twilight Sparkle! Get away! Don't touch me!" the filly cried, jumping onto her hind legs and leaning against the statue.

“Shh! It’s okay; I’m not going to hurt you.” Twilight reassured the pony.

The stranger lifted a shaking hoof and pointed it at Twilight. “You’re one of those evil Element Bearers who turned my daddy into stone!” She spoke in a frightened voice.

Twilight had a difficult time processing what was being told to her. Her eyes shrunk down to the size of pinpricks. “Your……what? What is your name?”

The pink pony looked at the ground. “S-s-screwball.” she whispered.

“And you’re Discord’s…”

“Yes, I am Discord’s daughter!” Screwball snapped. “He created me with his magic and I don’t care what you say about him. He’s not evil, and he’s not a monster! He’s my daddy and I love him! I’m taking him back to my cave, even if it kills me!”

“Well, Screwball…” Twilight stammered. “You can’t do that. He belongs in the gardens. I have to take him back. If he gets out, who knows what terrible things could happen!”

“No!” Screwball exclaimed, wrapping her hooves around the statue’s waist and beginning to sob. “Please don’t take my daddy away! I have nopony else!

Twilight’s heart broke slightly at watching Screwball cry like that. She felt and overwhelming wave of dread and regret fill her up. Sure, Discord had been a villain, but she and her friends had taken way an innocent girl’s father.

She could hear Screwball talking, but she had a hard time understanding her words. “If Princess Celestia finds out I did this, she’ll turn me to stone, too!”

Twilight’s head snapped back up. “How did you get past the guards?”

Screwball sniffed, wiping her eyes. “I put them under a hypnosis spell so that nopony would suspect anything.”

Of course. Twilight thought, almost smiling. Chaos magic. I guess she really is Discord’s daughter.
“You said you live in a cave?”

“Yeah. There’s no place else for me to go. I usually don’t go there, though, unless the guards see me at night, or if there’s bad weather. They don’t usually come by my daddy’s statue, though, so they don’t spot me often.” Screwball said, a few tears falling down her cheeks as she relived painful memories.

It felt like Twilight’s better judgment was hitting her on the head with a rolled up newspaper, telling her to go to Celestia and have the filly given to foster parents, but she never regretted what she said next:

“I can help you.”

Screwball looked up with a confused and unsure expression. “R-really?”

“Yes.” Twilight said, holding her hoof out. “I promise I can help you. I won’t say a word about this to Celestia.”

“I don’t know.” Screwball said, biting her bottom lip. “What are you going to do?”

“Obviously you can’t keep the guards under your spell forever,” Twilight started, lowering her hoof. “So I’m going to make you invisible to them. They’ll never, ever be able to see you! However, you will still have to hide from tourists, and anypony else that comes.”

Screwball’s face brightened. “You can do that?” then her smile once again ran from her face. “I’m not sure if my dad would want me to, since you just turned him to stone a few months ago.” Screwball turned to face her imprisoned father.

“Daddy?” she asked. “Can we trust Twilight?”

Twilight didn’t believe Screwball would really be able to communicate with Discord while he was turned to stone, but apparently she could, because she grinned from ear to ear and giggled. “Oh, thank you!” she said, throwing her arms around his middle.
She turned back to Twilight, hopping in place like Pinkie Pie. “He said yes!” she informed Twilight.

“Alright.” Twilight said, smiling at the filly and raising her hoof. “Do we have a deal, then?”

“You betcha!”
And just like that, their deal was sealed. Twilight levitated Discord next to her while she walked. Screwball bounced on the other side of her, grinning like a maniac.

“This doesn’t mean I like you.” Twilight whispered to Discord as she placed him back on his pedestal. “I’m just helping your daughter to be not-miserable.”

She thought that, for a moment, she could almost see Discord smirking at her.

The two mares walked over to the Garden’s entrance, where two white soldiers were standing. They didn’t move and their eyes were like Screwball’s: endless swirls.

Twilight rested her horn against each of their horn tips and preformed a magic spell. It was surprisingly easy for her. She had actually used this spell before.

When she looked to the side Screwball was gone again. She finally found her sitting in front of Discord’s statue, keeping oddly quiet. Her eyes were glued on him. Twilight sat down next to the girl.

“Do you always do this?” Twilight asked.

Screwball nodded, not taking her eyes off of Discord.

“Where do you sleep?”

Screwball finally spoke. “Here at my Daddy’s feet.”

Twilight wanted to apologize and was about to, but then she thought about something: even if Discord was in his stone prison, he was still her family. He still loved her. At least she got to see him. At least she could talk to him. It wasn’t the worst for Screwball. She had somewhere to sleep in case of emergencies.

“You’re a loyal daughter, Screwball.” Twilight said.

Again, Screwball said nothing.

Twilight stood up and started to leave. Just before she was out of earshot, Screwball said, “Just so you know, when Daddy gets out he still won’t like you, but I kind of do.”

“Thank you.” Twilight whispered.

She took the spell Screwball had placed on the guards off, and they looked at her in confusion. “Twilight?” one asked. “How long have you been here?”

“Oh, I just came for a quick stroll. Have a good night.” Twilight said happily before trotting off.

The guards looked at each other in confusion; sure they hadn’t seen Twilight walk in.
---------------------------------------
Twilight snuggled under her covers, grateful for the warmth they brought. Just before she blew out the candle she had placed on her bedside table, she paused. In the distance, she heard a little girl laughing, and a man laughing along with her.

Twilight smiled and blew out the candle.

“Good night, Screwball.”

Comments ( 16 )

Two things:
I am not 'best author':twilightblush:
I loved this:fluttershyouch:

7305169

Hey, thanks!
:derpyderp2: trying not to freak out that you noticed me.... Failed

OH MY GOSH I AM GONNA DIE THIS IS SO AWESOMEEEEEEEEEEE okay, enough of that. But I love your stuff, you're amazing :heart:

She saw a little link filly


SHYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!

but in all seriousness found an error

7308706
I actually saw that error while I was re-reading it but forgot to correct it :applejackconfused: Anyway enjoy your Legend of Zelda reference here. :raritywink:

But really most of these stories are ones I wrote when I was 11 but I'm just now posting because I have an account. :fluttershyouch:

7305169

I want to know if you would read a sequel to this story, maybe about what happened to Screwball after Keep Calm and Flutter On, or maybe The Elements visit Discord's house in Chaosville and find out the big secret.

I read this story a long time ago and had been trying to find it again for the longest time. It's one of my favorites!

7468225 oh, thank you!! before I had a fimfiction account I would read a uch of stories and now I have to find them all again. the struggle is real :rainbowlaugh:

7469683 there was a great one i read that was written from the perspective of a five start chef who had his restaurant burn down, he temporarily moves to Ponyville, and ends up adopting Scootaloo who ran away from her mom because she was a drunk and her father left her. i didn't get to finish reading the story though. :fluttercry: it was so beautiful

7469702 that really sounds like something I'd want to read....dag nabbit hard-to-remember story titles! :ajbemused:

7469719 the only thing I remember from it name wise is the grassy knoll. It's the name of the main characters restaurant

7469719 also, I don't mean to self advertise, I am working on a scootaloo fic and would love some input from someone else who has a good scootaloo fic. If you ever feel like checking it out, it's the one on my page with an actual picture to go with the story.

7469719 I found the story that I mentioned earlier! If you go to browse, add scootaloo as a tag and then type chef into the main box, it's the first story that comes up. I am so happy! Thought I'd let you know in case you wanted to check it out.

This fic will always have a special place in my heart. It was literally the first fic I have ever read, and the fic that made me want more. This was just...wow.

8390653
I want you to know that I was in history class when i read your comment and i was hungry and bored and your comment absolutely made my day :pinkiehappy: you have no idea so thank you thank you!!!

also funny story I sort of checked out for an entire summer but now im back :yay: and ive been reading all my stories over and i can barely remember writing them :derpytongue2:

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