Quickfix's Night Fight

by Evowizard25

Mecha Cats and Mice are really daemons

One of the most important things a scientist has to keep a close eye on is their sleep. They can’t very well create scientific marvels if they couldn’t think straight. Quickfix Aperture never necessarily had that problem since she only sometimes thought straight when creating her works of art. Just like a painter, she was one to take her creations in a series of different styles of techniques that didn’t always mesh. It’s why her lab was made of such sturdy material.

Her family had lost far too many labs over the centuries. From simple huts thousands of years ago out on the prairie, to mechanized steel laboratories that could fit an entire city inside. The Apertures had found new and exciting ways to pretty much destroy themselves during their inventing sprees. In those moments of destruction, they’d gathered information that had sparked countless furthering ideals for the nation of Equestria.

Quickfix was determined to find such a spark. She knew her invention, an ‘automobile’, could revolutionize the country for centuries to come. Her wrench lay nestled at her side, ever ready to serve her. She cradled it like a child and she’d be hard pressed to part with it. “We’ve got a lot of tinkerin’ to do tomorrow, Clink.” She gave the beloved wrench a kiss. “Sleep tight. Dream of inventin’ tonight.” She closed her eyes with a blissful smile.

That was when she heard the squeaking. She paid it no mind. Just a flicker of her ears as she tried to ignore it. Sadly, it didn’t go away. So her ears couldn’t help but trail after the sound, causing her to stay awake. She growled as she raised herself up, “What the hay is that?” She looked around herself, until she spied what looked like a small white blur scurrying on the floor.

She jumped out of bed, wrench in hoof. “Ye got a lot of nerve gettin’ me up at this hour. What do ye have to say fer yerself?” The little blur appeared again, running past her hooves. She swung it down, smashing a hole through the floor. “Darn it. Look what ye made me do… a mouse?” Having used her magic to light up a small candle, she eyed what appeared to be a small mouse. It twitched its little nose up at her. “That’s it? Awww, ah wanted somethin’ ah could fight.” She shrugged, hefting her wrench up with her magic. “Still, gotta kill ye now. It’s not ye. It’s me invention, ye understand.”

The mouse squealed in fear and ran straight out of the room.

“Get back here,” Quickfix took off after it. Even with the natural endurance of the North, she found the mouse’s speed a little hard to match. She growled as she narrowly missed the mouse twice. Twice denting her walls around her from her missed aim.

Finally, the mouse ran straight through a small hole in the wall. “What the…” She blinked in surprise at the small mouse hole. “Why is there a mouse hole in my house?”

“Meow…” A mechanical cat came strolling through the hallway.The clunky thing looked more akin to a collecting of metal boxes bolted together to look like an animal, then an animal itself. ‘Early design.’

“Oh yeah,” Quickfix scratched the back of her head. “Ah made a cat so… Ah thought ah abandoned that project.” She shrugged, “No problem. Cat, switch to kill mode.”

The cat simply stared up at her, until it laid down and started to lick at its imaginary privates. Quickfix face-hooved, “Ah had to make ye lifelike, didn’t ah?” She pulled the cat over to her with her magic, causing it to shriek. “Oh hush. Ah aint gonna hurt ye.”

The same couldn’t be said for the metal cat. Once she got it close, it managed to break out of her magical hold with a little bit of ‘anti-magic’ defenses. ‘Ah overthought this one.’ The mare struggled the grab it with her hooves as it scratched her head. Finally, she forced it down onto the ground. Her face and upper body was covered in scratches, but she didn’t care. ‘Redheart will fix ‘em up tomorrow.’

Forcing it down on its stomach, she opened a little compartment on its back. Her wrench gently came down, shifting to fit the switch. Turning it to the stylized ‘kill’ command, that had blood red font and a dead mouse’, she smirked. “Now ye should work fine.” She pulled back and gestured to the hole. “Kill.” The cat nodded and ran off, no doubt trying to find a way to the mouse.

Quickfix sighed, “Now ah can get some shut eye.” She covered her mouth as she yawned and trotted back into her room. She smiled as she got back into her covers. They were specifically designed by her mother to be at optimal coziness. After much field testing, she could attest to that.

The moment she closed her eyes, she expected to fall into a slumber. The universe apparently had other plans, or more specifically, a mouse and mecha cat. Without warning, the two raced over her face, screaming at the top of their lungs. The mare threw her hooves to cover her face, only for the two to run over her belly next.

It was one thing to have a little mouse run over you. It was another to have a mecha cat do it. “Ye darn blasted, infernal, piece of junk.” She sat up and glowered at the two as they raced about. “Ah made ye to get rid of that thing, not run me over.”

The infernal machine didn’t listen to her. It just kept chasing after the mouse, knocking over furniture. She let out a snarl as she ran her hooves over her cheeks, pulling down her lower eyelids in frustration. “That’s it,” she jumped out of bed. “Ah’ll get ye and the mouse, if’n-” She was cut off when they ran straight into her legs. Well, the cat did. Being flipped in the air and falling on your bottom isn’t pleasant, especially on a metal floor.

“Ye know, this means war.” She narrowed her eyes as she imagined all of what she wanted to do to the duo. ‘Oh this might be fun after all.’

____________________________________________________________

Quickfix had a satisfied smirk as she screwed in the last bolt of her new turret. It was much larger than her older ones and wasn’t mobile, but the blocky and twin gunned machine would do its job. She wiped away the sweat on her brow with her foreleg, “Took me an hour and one hay of a smoothie, but yer done. Now let’s see ye in action.” Her grin turned malicious as she waited for the duo to run into its sights.

Low and behold, the two ran inside without a moment of delay. Quickfix quickly swatted the turret, turning it on from the motion. It whizzed as its gears roared to life and locked on. Without anything else to add, twin streams of arrows shot out from the machine.

However, there was something she forgot to factor in. Her turret was originally designed for larger targets. The duo were too small for it to get a good lock on. So instead, it just wrecked the room as the arrows cut through everything in their path without remourse. She frowned as the two ran around her quicker than an arrow. “What the-” The machine, in its haste to catch up, had smacked its turrets into her chest, throwing her a ways across the room.

Hitting the wall, she groaned as she lifted her head. Her eyes widened as the turret made another pass. She ducked, narrowly avoiding being skewered. She lifted her head, only for the two to jump on top of it, knocking her back to the ground. “Ye two are doin’ this on purpose YIKES!” She ducked again as it fired once more over her head.

________________________________________________________________

She had to admit. Her rocket boots were mighty comfy. ‘Course they are. Mom made ‘em.’ She couldn’t help but grin maniacally. ‘Ah just made a few minor alterations.’ The sounds of the coming menaces caused her to chuckle. “It’s all over now. Science is gonna show ye don’t mess with ponies.”

She saw the two run down the hallway, right past the room she was in. Rushing forward, she looked straight down the hallway at the soon to be dead creatures. “Say yer prayers.” She lit up her horn and activated the boosters. They took off perfectly.

Well that’s what she thought at first. The two vermin were knocked off their feet from the shockwave. Tumbling about, they shook their heads to find the unicorn’s body imprinted in the wall. They looked to each other in confusion, before shrugging. Then the cat let out a snarl as it tried to snag the mouse and the game was on again.

“Blasted rocket boots,” Quickfix muttered. It was slightly muffled by the steel.

________________________________________________________________________

Quickfix let out a laugh worthy of her mad scientist ancestors. The mare was completly covered in a mechanical suit thrice her size. “Now what are ye gonna do now?” She smirked at the two creatures before her. It would be so easy. All she need to do was…

“Ah forgot,” she sighed. “Ah can’t move in this thing.”

____________________________________________________________________

“AH-HA!” Quickfix thrust down her mecha net, capturing the two. It quickly closed off. “Now I’ve… got ye?” She raised a questionin’ eye as she heard the sound of rockets within the net. ‘It can’t melt this thing. It’s designed to face the harshest of trials. It’s not like it can fly out…. Ah put rockets on the cat, didn’t ah?’ She sighed, “Ah hate my life sometimes.” With that, she was taken into the air as she held on for dear life as the cat flew through the house.

_________________________________________________________________________

“Eat this,” Quickfix smirked as she stood up on her hindlegs. Her forelegs held a large rocket launcher. At the end, she lit the fuse and no sooner then one can say ‘boom’ it fired. The large firecracker headed straight for her target. The cat stopped and turned. ‘Stupid creature.’

Let it not be said Quickfix didn’t put effort into her inventions. The cat opened its mouth and ate the firecracker. “Huh,” Quickfix blinked in surprise. “Well what’d ye know.”

And then she was blown back by the proceeded fiery burp.

________________________________________________________________________

Quickfix had enough of this. She was going to take down those two no matter what. She was an Aperture. A pony of the North. They never backed down from a challenge. She would stay strong. She would persevere.

She would blow her entire house up!

“Yer gonna get it now,” she smiled crookedly. Her fur and mane were a mess and a manic glee sparkled in her eyes. “No more mice. No more cats. No more!” She started to laugh, hearing lightning spark behind her. “Huh, must have left the lightnin’ rods on again.”

“Meow.”

There it was. That fake ‘meow’ that made her teeth grind against one another. Turning her head back, she looked at the two vermin. They were just sitting there, staring up at her. “What? What do ye want now?”

They didn’t say anything.

“Well tough luck, yer gonna get it now.” She held on to the lever. “Ah’m finally goin’ to get some sleep, even if’n it kills me…. Oh wait.” Her eyes widened. “Ah didn’t think this plan through.” She shrugged. “Oh well, can’t say ah was a quitter.” She moved the lever slightly down.

Before she could pull it all the way down, the mouse jumped up onto the console. “What?” She glared down at it. That’s when it held up a piece of cheese. “Cheese? Ye think that’s just gonna make up for all this mess.” Just then, she felt something cold rub up against her leg. She looked down at the mecha cat. “Oh ye aren’t gonna get off scot free.” It gave her its best kitty face. “Ohhh, why did ah have to install cuteness features.”

Looking back at the little mouse and then to the cheese, she sighed and let go. “Fine,” she picked up the cheese and threw it into her mouth. Swallowing it, she glared at them, “Ah want ye out of my house by mornin’.” The two nodded. “Good.” She trotted back to her room and jumped back into bed. “Ugh, ah really need to see Redheart tomorrow mornin’. Ah feel like ah’m gonna pass out.”

She groaned as she felt the duo jump into the bed with her. “Just don’t fight, okay?” They didn’t say anything, instead closing their eyes. ‘Well… at least it wasn’t borin’.’ She chuckled and let herself drift to sleep.

She briefly pondered her inventions that she had used. They were all prototypes, but even she didn’t know they were that bad. ‘Got somethin’ out of this.’ She smiled. ‘Tomorrow’s gonna be a busy day.’

Author's Note:

This is just a little thing I thought on the fly for Quickfix. She's a mare I really need to use more and it's for NineCaliber's contest, which is over today. Hopefully, it'll be worth it. I had a lot of fun regardless, working on this.

I hope you did too as you read it and please leave a comment.

Comments

[NobodieZ]

Great work, very funny. Was this inspired by the looney tunes?

Also First comment! I go sit in a corner.

[Evowizard25]

7265927 Wily Coyote, so kind of. I loved those cartoons growing up.

[MIKEANTHONY321]

1.bp.blogspot.com/-sS788ha5Ahg/T1uPNPvTIwI/AAAAAAAAACU/j9IrNNU7H-k/s1600/quickfix.jpg

[Nines]

why did ah have to install cuteness features.

I'm afraid those come standard, Quickfix.

A cute read! I really enjoyed it.

[howard035]

Quickfix is like Lesson Zero Twilight Sparkle, but all the time! I really like her. It's really suprising there even is an up north left, with the Aperture family.

I really love the picture, where did you get it?

[Evowizard25]

7275949 found it on derpibooru. Yeah, the site has caused me a lot of frustration at times, which sometimes attributes to my writer's block, but it's a great way to find pics easy and fast.

As for the comparison, didn't think of it but it fits. As for why the Northerners survived, they're probably one of the hardiest bunch in Equestria. I mean, Nightmare personally tried to exterminate them and they're still kicking to this day.

[fractalman]

Let it not be said Quickfix didn’t put effort into her inventions. The cat opened its mouth and ate the firecracker. “Huh,” Quickfix blinked in surprise. “Well what’d ye know.”
And then she was blown back by the proceeded fiery burp.

That was a Spicy meat'a'ball.

[Jninja15]

🎵Aperture Science. We do what we must, because we can. 🎵