13: This Was Going to Be the Last Chapter, But in the Interests of Getting Things Out in a Semi-timely Fashion I Shortened it and Transformed it into the Penultimate Chapter
The orchestra swelled.
Spike loped down the aisle, his girth flattening a few of the more centrally seated guests. Twilight strode beside him, a wing wrapped around his thinnest claw in the closest approximation of an embrace she could manage without the buttocks-related difficulties of Spike’s growth spell.
“Spike, why is your crown ogling the ushers?” whispered Twilight.
The changeling regalia warped slightly, its amorphous eyeballs boiling to its surface, popping, and reforming elsewhere.
“Don’t really know. Sometimes it whispers to me, but I’ve learned to ignore it.”
Scraping bits of the Smooze off his tail, Spike passed under a colossal flower arch and reached the front, where Princess Cadance stood. A squadron of changelings flanked her, black tears dribbling down some of their perforated cheeks. A few of these mares of honor instinctively bowed to their new king.
Then came the bride. Voices of the children’s choir--rented from an orphanage by Chrysalis’ request—harmonized as the processional climaxed.
Her dress, a diaphanous shroud of spider silk and lace woven together by Equestria’s best tailors, caught the starlight in a riot of color. Opalescent gemstones, crystallized from the Queen’s own slime, hung on every silken strand, all placed under Rarity’s watchful, glassy eyes.
Buttressing the bulk of the vast train, four changelings followed, their behinds leaking with white ooze. Spike jumped to the conclusion that they must have shapeshifted into spiders to produce the silk, that the white ooze was its remnants, and that he did not want to consider that any further.
Swathed in this elegance trotted none other than… Princess Cadance.
The camouflaged bride looked around, saw the other Cadance before her, and sighed. “Force of habit.”
A flare of witchfire dropped her disguise. Soft pink flesh gave way to hard-edged exoskeleton and bubbling slime, causing most of the wedding guests to recoil slightly, and the few who were into that sort of thing to lean in closer.
Her hooves scraped against the red carpet, dark stains forming where she walked. Suspicious fluids dribbled down her throat, fluids that an astute eye might gather had more to do with orphans than was entirely acceptable in high society. On the groom’s side of the aisle, Celestia contemplated if she could somehow detonate the bride and still have grandfoals.
Cadance’s—the real Cadance’s—smile stretched from cheek to rosy cheek. “Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to…”
Chrysalis—the erstwhile Cadance—butted in. “Look, this is not my first rodeo. Can we…”
“Hey!” A bull in the back yelled.
“No offense to our bovine guests. Can we skip the formalities and… what’s the pony term?”
Spike chimed in. “Get on with it?”
“Yes, get it on. Well, Cadance?” Chrysalis licked her lips, a serrated tongue sopping up the remnants of fluid.
“And gut all the pomp and ceremony?” The princess shrugged. “I used to think you couldn’t rush true love, but Shiny proved that wrong, know what I mean, girls?”
Chrysalis did not.
Cadance’s smile deadened. “Uh, so, um, yeah. Do you, Spike, take this… bug to be your lawfully wedded wife?”
Chrysalis butted in. “He does. I do, too.”
The princess raised an eyebrow. “You take yourself to be your wife?”
“That could be arranged. My drones are very skilled shapeshifters.” One of her bride’s mares approximated a blush. “But I don’t think that’s legal this far north.”
Cadance nodded sagely. “Right, so… do you, Chrysalis—”
“Queen Chrysalis.”
Spike rolled his eyes, a colossal endeavour and one he feared he would be repeating quite a lot once he was truly hitched. He cast an askance glance at the castle’s windows, where far above his old friends watched the… Wait.
“—take this dragon to be your lawfully wedded husband?”
The windows should be riots of stained glass, but for some reason they looked empty, nothing but bland quartz.
“By the power vested in me by myself, I now pronounce you…”
“If you would so kindly wait a moment, darlings!”
Rarity’s voice, crystal clear, came from down the aisle.
Also LikedSimilarAuthor
- somatic · 2.8k words · 1,654 16 · 18k views
- somatic · 1.2k words · 582 4 · 7.8k views
- Pen Mightier · 70k words · 1,068 51 · 16k views
- FamousLastWords · 7.8k words · 788 26 · 15k views
- CategoricalGrant · 12k words · 681 48 · 20k views
- CategoricalGrant · 8.4k words · 601 15 · 7.9k views
- Little_Draco · 70k words · 1,360 94 · 27k views
- Ekhidna · 14k words · 181 4 · 5.8k views
Stats
Page generated in 0.235 seconds
Total duration
648 users online
740,469 hits today, 2,004,447 yesterday
FIMFiction
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Follow & Support Us
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
Well, first of all, welcome back.
Second off,
whaaaaaaaaaaaaat?
9394465
Stuff happened. It will be explained in the fullness of time, though you may be able to guess what's going on if your mind works the same way mine does (which would be very unfortunate for you).
Also, I like your profile picture. It's spicy.
9394474
"I OBJECT!"
9394483
i.imgur.com/axyDFLo.jpg
Although, it may not be what you think.
Well, this was as unexpected as Rarity's objection. Looking forward to the thrilling conclusion.
hmmmmm
Oh shit! The girls left the glass! Also, welcome back!
Short but great all the same. Now wrap this up!
9394474
Looking forward to seeing what stuff happened/will happen.
And since you mentioned it, thanks for the profile picture compliment! It's from the cover of an old 70's music album called "Hope" by the band Klaatu, in case you want to see it in a higher resolution.
Rarity, please, interrupting a royal wedding when they're already married? '
Such a grievous mistake, to be looked down upon by the aristocracy!
How COULD you?
*smirks*
So close!
By Celestia's Great Fat Flanks!
IT'S ALIVE!!!!!!!!!
A few dozen cans of Raid Quick Kill would've easily taken care of this.
I've learned how to handle unwanted love interests from the Mr. Plinkett school of break-ups!
Well, you kept us waiting a while for this wedding didn't you?
9395072
I wonder how many cans those bugs would take. Do you think more or less than 6? I also wonder if the fast-acting, low-irritant kind is the best for them too.
Yes....
YEEEEEEESSSSSSS....
I AM GOING TO STRANGLE YOU IF YOU RUIN THIS, YOU MARSHMALLOW BITCH!
9395561 Well, it depends on how many orphans Chrysalis has drained of all love until they're lifeless husks of self-indulgent wallowing misery (this is where millennials come from! True Internet fact!).
If she's had too many, her chemoresistance profile increases and it takes more RAID. Might even have to bump up to DDT bombs!
Correction:
Scraping
9397148
I have amended my sin. Thank you for bringing to light my atrocities.
damnit rarity.
I imagine she fainted somewhere in the middle of the process, but managed to stay upright because "falling over is unlady-like", as she claimed.
Previous chapter:
This chapter:
It seems she (somehow) got her wish after all...
My reaction to this chapter: Basically what 9394465 said.
Anyway, good chapter!
I'm curious what will happen next.
(I somehow suspect it will involve Rarity.)
That was not what I was expecting
Uh what was that ?
Also please update it's been 4 months aaaa
9636460
Oh, I'll update. The sun may be a burnt-out ember and entropy may have taken us all, but somehow, I'll still be there, scribbling out approximately one word of fanfic a millennium, as I do now.
9637409
When is the update? I love this story!!
Go Rarity, GO!
Please finish the finale if your feeling better pleeeeeeeasssssseeeee.
What?
Sit back down Rarity!
Please continue the story!
That moment when you discover that a fanfic you thought finished actually updated like months ago and also isn't finished
I could not be happier
Don't stand in the way off true love, Rarity!
Chapter13? I TAKE IT!!
9394474
So... Is this story done or what?
Well this was quite the ride. It would've been better if it was fleshed out, though.
Ahh, such cultured members of society.
So... Is this it? But it's still incomplete...
To sum it up: bizarre!.. What is happening? -- asked I for the entirety of time... What is this... chaos??..
In all honesty, this helped not to take everything seriously. The things, which happened... The things, which were said!..
But, again: what???
Nice changeling explanation, by the way! But! Wasted potential! So much tragedy could have been had!.. Monsters, who can't fit in!.. But they try!.. But they can't!.. And they know it and are... proud of that!.. Oh!.. But it brings them pain!.. Oh!..
Urgh... What do I do with this
?..
Funny... and bizarre read... Huh...
10785122 I am currently MAKING good Daleks!
Cliffhanger?? NOOOO!!!
Plz continue the story
. I really like it.
Cliffhanger!
One more chapter. When you come back, please, finish this story. It is really funny and emotional and good and it really make me sad seeing it not reaching a well deserved conclusion.
9637409
Is there any chance that you'll finish this story?
You can't seriously end it like that?