A Little Motivation
Things had been incredible the past few weeks. It seemed as though Twilight's life was falling perfectly into place. Her studies in friendship were advancing well in her opinion. Everyday brought something new; whether it be a chance to overcome adversity with her friends or simply the chance to deepen their bonds. Things on the romantic front were progressing perfectly too, perhaps even better than her friendship studies. It wasn't as though they had outed themselves to the entirety of Ponyville, but on the other hoof the two lovers did not go out of their way to hide. It all seemed innocent enough, and it was obvious the only ones who knew the truth were still their friends and that was fine. It wasn't like they needed the extra attention, especially Fluttershy. Content was the best way to put it.
Pinkie Pie on the other hoof wasn't doing as well. Getting Rainbow Dash in her mind had become an impossibility, but thinking of her former marefriend hurt more than she thought possible. Emotional pain was not something Pinkie was new to, but somehow the pain of her recent breakup seemed worse. It seemed ludicrous to be unable to move past the problem yet somehow she always found herself laying in bed, aching to see Rainbow Dash but she already knew how that would have gone.
On Rainbow Dash's side she'd never ended up going on her date. Instead she'd let the poor stallion down east, and gave some lame excuse as to why she couldn't make it. Things had gotten more difficult since then. Dash found herself unable to focus on even the most mundane of tasks and both her professional and personal lives were taking a hit. She was finding that even her flying seemed to have slowed, going too fast whilst so distracted would prove to be dangerous. She couldn't bring herself to go see Pinkie Pie either so until either of them could find a way to stand being near each other, it seemed they were at a standstill.
Dash was more worried than ever about somepony finding out about her. That in itself was odd, as she was no longer dating Pinkie Pie. The more disturbing thing was the nightmares that accompanied her fears. She'd even had one where Pinkie Pie had told Ponyville, simply to spite her. When Dash had woken from that one she'd felt even worse than she had before. That was her lowest, and the time she'd almost caved in and gone to find Pinkie Pie. Instead she remained rooted in her bed, terrified. Rainbow Dash could not keep living as she was, something was bound to give. She wished she could talk to somepony, but nopony could know... Perhaps she could talk to somepony who already knew, though. Twilight knew. Rainbow hadn't been especially please with that information but since the damage was already done...
That was how the pegasus found herself fidgeting nervously in Twilight's library, a cup of tea clutched between her hooves. Even with Pinkie Pie she'd never said the actual words. She'd maybe said a variation of them, or perhaps she'd even said it without actually saying it. Every time she admitted her feelings to Pinkie Pie or kissed her, technically she was admitting it. "Twilight, I..." Rainbow dash began but the words caught on her throat.
Dash hadn't spent an exceedingly large amount of time with Twilight, so talking about something so personal was still difficult. She also knew Twilight was exceedingly smart so she knew that the powerful unicorn must at least suspect the reason for her visit. It would be so much easier if Twilight could initiate the conversation but Pinkie had probably warned her of how she'd reacted... Dash curled herself further back into the chair and simply blurted out something else instead. "How is Pinkie Pie?" the words came out quickly, even for Rainbow Dash.
Twilight blinked, the question having caught her off guard. She shook her head softly and sighed. "Rainbow Dash I'm not going to claim I know exactly what you're going through. I'm also not going to tell you what to do because the short answer is that I don't know. The only thing I can suggest is talk to her. That's the only way you'll get any answers." the unicorn reached out to gently pat her friend on the shoulder.
"I wish it were that easy Twilight, I really messed up. I really hurt her feelings. I kept trying to do the right thing, I kept trying to fix it but I always made it worse until I made my final mistake. I just didn't want anyone to find out about us." Rainbow Dash hid her face amidst her hoofs as she spoke, obviously embarrassed.
Twilight nodded, pouring each of them another cup of tea with her magic. "I'm sure it's not easy. I didn't understand what I was feeling at first, Rainbow Dash. Talking to my friends is what helped me figure it out, and it all worked out for the best. If I'd buried it I wouldn't be where I am now. It's sort of a taboo subject; in fact I'd never heard of ponies of the same sex falling in love before. I only began to look it up when I started experiencing feelings for Fluttershy." Twilight inhaled sharply, and seemed to be carefully considering her next words. "I think you have to be true to yourself, Rainbow Dash. Even if everypony else judges you you will always have a safe place here. You will always be able to be yourself with the rest of our friends too. They may not know yet but I hope you know that when you do tell them everything will be okay. We'll keep you safe if we have to, from all the harsh words that may come your way."
Rainbow Dash was overcome with emotion, though she kept it hidden well. For somepony who claimed to not have a good grasp on friendship the studious unicorn had outdone herself. It was a moving speech and it gave Rainbow Dash a lot to think about. Though she'd been in the wrong, that much was certain, her side merited concern too. She may never forgive herself properly for what she'd done to Pinkie Pie. She could maybe get to a place where she could forgive herself for being how she was though. Learn that she didn't need to be anypony else but herself and perhaps even be proud of herself. That would be the kind of mare Pinkie Pie wanted by her side again. She wasn't quite ready to speak to the party pony yet. Things would undoubtedly still be rocky between them for a while, but talking to Twilight had been the first step. At least that's what Dash thought, anyway.
"Thanks Twilight. That means a lot to me, I mean it. I guess even I can forget how awesome I am sometimes, so it's nice I have friends who know it too. Good thing they'll remind me when I need it too, heh." Rainbow Dash chuckled softly as she finished her second beverage. Her face wrinkled up and she stuck her tongue out, clearly not a fan of tea. She set the cup down and got up. As Rainbow Dash pushed the door upon she unfurled her wings and lifted herself off the ground. "You're a good friend, Twi. Even if you are kind of an egghead. Guess that's why we love ya." Rainbow Dash offered her friend one final, cheeky grin before disappearing in a streak of colors. It left Twilight shaking her head again, though she was pleased she helped.
**
"You totally did that on purpose!" Rainbow Dash screamed. She tossed the ball into the air behind her and as it came down she kicked it with her back legs as hard as it could. The ball flew backwards as though it were possessed and was quickly gone from their field of vision. That ball was definitely lost forever.
Pinkie Pie and Rainbow Dash's reunion was worse than either of them had expected. Dash's love of sports was no secret to anypony but especially to Pinkie Pie. She'd bumped Rainbow Dash while counting the ponies for whom she would need to make balloons for. Not only had it ruined Rainbow Dash's ball bouncing, for which she was trying to set a record. It had also sent her off in a huffy fit. She'd flown away and Pinkie Pie had immediately chased after her knowing instantly what Rainbow Dash would have been thinking.
Rainbow Dash was convinced that Pinkie Pie had done it on purpose. Surely the excitable earth pony was still upset with her. Though she had every right to be upset it did not give her the right to ruin something Rainbow Dash was excited about. The pegasus had finally found something to distract herself from her troubles, be it momentarily. Then the one she was trying to distract herself from pulled her right back in. Perhaps the universe was trying to tell her something?
On Pinkie's side she was regretful the moment she'd pushed her former lover. Pinkie hadn't meant to ruin Rainbow Dash's undertaking, it truly had been an accident. That wasn't to say she was pleased with Dash, no, she was still quite upset. Furious, in fact. She didn't wish harm on Rainbow Dash, though. Pinkie Pie still missed her, and wished they'd never fought. She wished they were okay and as they were. Instead they were fighting and she was being accused of something she did not do. "I did not!" Pinkie screamed back. She hadn't even intended to yell but emotions began to swell inside of her the moment Rainbow Dash had opened her mouth. "I was going to throw a party to celebrate your accomplishment!"
Anypony else might have found the pitch of Pinkie's voice annoying; but not Rainbow Dash. To her it was endearing and cute. A depressing reminder of what she'd given up. How nice it was to hear a declaration of love from the beautiful sing-song voice of the most beautiful mare in Equestria. "You did it because you're mad at me, Pinkie Pie! Don't act like you want to throw me a party." Dash scoffed.
"It's true." the hurt was obvious in Pinkie's voice. "I care when my friends accomplish something..."
"Oh, we're still friends?" Dash snapped back.
Enough was enough. "Just because you don't care doesn't mean I-"
"I CARE!" For the first time since they'd broken up Rainbow Dash felt the tears come. "I care!" She screamed again, though in her mind it came out pathetic. "I care. All I do is think about you. I feel bad all the time, Pinkie Pie. I never meant to hurt you, I never meant to hide. I can't take it back. I never even went out with him! I cancelled, because all I could think about was you. I can't even sleep because of what I did to you, Pinks!"
Pinkie Pie was taken aback. She stepped back slightly, eyes wide in confusion. She was beginning to think that she may have the situation wrong. She thought Rainbow Dash was fine, happy even. She imagined it would be a great relief to not have to sneak around anymore. It was impossible to get caught if there was nopony to get caught with. "Dashie, I..." Her sentence trailed off, no longer certain her anger was warranted.
Looking back perhaps she had been a tad pushy. She hadn't meant to be, she thought she was helping. Seeing Rainbow Dash as she currently was though... It was proving to be somewhat of an eye opener. Rainbow Dash was not fine, in truth she seemed worse off than she was herself. Rainbow Dash's issues were deeper than Pinkie Pie had first thought. There was more to it than caring with other ponies would think of her. Some deep rooted fear of rejection perhaps. Seeing her like this, Rainbow Dash no longer seemed like the bad mare, no... Pinkie wasn't the bad one either. They had both played a part in the events that led to the breakup, and there was no longer a clear pony to blame. "Rainbow Dash, I'm really super sorry. That wasn't very considerate of me to say. I know you care, I promise." Her voice was no longer quite as high pitched as it had been. She pawed at the ground sheepishly, somewhat ashamed.
"I'm sorry too, Pinkie Pie." Dash sniffled out. She rubbed at her eyes with the front of her leg, dampening the fur slightly. "I didn't mean to hurt you, but I wasn't ready to tell anypony. I'm still not. I'm trying to work on it though, I talked to Twilight about it. Well, kind of..." Rainbow Dash managed to compose herself and stop the tears. "I did an awful thing and I'm sorry, I hope you can forgive me one day."
The next moment happened so quickly that Rainbow Dash never even saw it coming. The pink mare had her forelegs around Rainbow Dash's next before she could utter even another 'sorry'. Dash sighed contently and relaxed. She nuzzled Pinkie's cotton candy mane and sniffed one last time. It didn't mean they were back together, it didn't even mean they were completely okay. They would at least be able to be amiable, it seemed.
**
Out of all the ways Fluttershy had thought she'd be spending her day, stopping a dragon was not one of them. She'd tried to stay behind, she really had but Twilight had told her she was needed. It was impossible to deny her. Especially with the fate of Equestria hanging in the balance. Staying behind would have been selfish but even as their trek began Fluttershy couldn't see what help she would be. All of her friends expected her to be able to tame a wild dragon. It was all based off of her skills with animals. Her animal friends were not terrifying, fire breathing dragons though. She wasn't only being useless but she was slowing the rest of the group down as well. They seemed to like reminding her of it at every turn, too. Especially Rainbow Dash.
If any ponies were to be understanding of her situation surely it would have been Rainbow Dash or Twilight. Rainbow Dash had been her friend since they were foals and had seen first hoof some of the bullying she had endured. As for Twilight that went without saying and the shy pegasus did not think it was too much to expect a bit of understanding. It was the opposite though, and they seemed to be the ones most frustrated with her. With each step they took it seemed things grew worse. It was almost enough to break down and cry. If she did though Twilight would simply remind her that "We don't have time for that."
Rainbow Dash had been the most vocal about Fluttershy's shortcomings. Before they'd even left Fluttershy had heard her and Twilight speaking about her. It had broken her heart and only made her more nervous. She wanted to make no mistakes to prove that she was as worthy as the rest of her friends instead she'd failed at every stop. She hadn't even been able to climb the mountain. Fluttershy had tried to get Twilight's attention before they headed up to say something, but she couldn't be bothered or couldn't hear her. It had forced Applejack to literally drag her the long way around and it had delayed their group several hours. Rainbow Dash had commented on it rather quickly too, and Twilight couldn't even hide her disappointment.
She hadn't been able to jump over the smallest of gaps even with her friends encouragement. The poor pegasus could practically hear the jokes in each of their heads. She felt like the biggest of losers and an embarrassment to her race. Fluttershy kept asking herself what sort of pegasus couldn't bring herself to fly over a tiny gap?
The avalanche had been the worst, though. She'd single hoofedly almost killed them all. When the rocks had begun to fall Fluttershy had curled herself up and hoped for the best. She'd gotten lucky and hadn't been hit. Meanwhile her marefriend was almost crushed and even when she cried for help it did not get Fluttershy up. Instead she had to watch as Applejack saved the mare she was falling in love with from an avalanche she had herself caused. Rarity had dodged the rocks as well and Pinkie Pie seemed to enjoy the entire ordeal. Rainbow Dash's glares shot daggers through her after, and her apologies didn't seem to mean much to anypony.
Then they got to the top, and Twilight volunteered her to go see the dragon. It was perhaps the worst moment of her life. Everypony was counting on her and seeing the disappointment in Twilight's eyes hurt more than any bully had managed to hurt her in the past. Again Rainbow Dash wasn't shy with expressing her irritation with the other pegasus. Fluttershy hid behind the largest boulder she could find, and did everything she could to keep the sobs at bay.
Twilight was the first to fail at removing the dragon and it was only after that failure she seemed to click on that she'd been ignoring Fluttershy for most of the day. I'm sure she understands, I mean... The fate of Equestria is at stake. she told herself, dreading seeing her special somepony upset. She approached the rock cautiously, peeking behind it and uttering a soft "Fluttershy?"
Fluttershy lifted her head from in between her forelegs to catch a glimpse of the violet unicorn approaching her. She quickly buried her muzzle back where it had been and whispered something inaudible. The only thing Twilight could hear was a series of high-pitched squeaks thought she assumed there were words buried underneath them. Hesitantly she moved to the crying pegasus and poked her lightly. "Fluttershy...?" she repeated.
The only thing that escaped were more muffled squeaks and sobs. Fluttershy's wings were pressed tightly to her back and her body rocked from her weeping. Everything seemed to fade from Twilight's world except for Fluttershy. She was barely even aware of the rest of her friends attempting to subdue the dragon. None of it mattered, Equestria didn't matter. What truly mattered was stopping Fluttershy's weeping because with each sob that passed the pegasus' lips Twilight's heart broke a little more. A hundred years of darkness suddenly seemed like a small price to pay if it kept Fluttershy by her side. "Please talk to me."
"You didn't seem very interested in talking earlier." Even as the words left her lips Fluttershy felt pathetic. It was kind of a low blow. The sobbing mare wasn't trying to be mean but those were the only words her mind had allowed to leave her mouth. Fluttershy was needier than she liked to admit. She hid it well in her opinion though and never really asked much of Twilight. The sad reality was that she'd needed her all day, for the first time truly needed her, and she hadn't been there. It was an incredibly selfish thing to think when there were more important things on the table, yet it couldn't be helped. She couldn't push aside the thought that the entire situation was somehow her fault.
"Oh, Fluttershy... I know. I can't apologize for worrying about Equestria but that doesn't I can't apologize for ignoring you." As she spoke Twilight got down beside Fluttershy, laying on her belly beside the pegasus. One leg snaked itself around Fluttershy's midsection and pulled her close. Violet and yellow met in a warm embrace. Twilight knew Fluttershy would never say the things she should. She would never take any of the blame on herself. She would take it all on silently and Twilight knew that couldn't be healthy. It seemed as though their would be many-a-talk in their future. Twilight would seek to understand and more importantly to help. All she could do in the moment was say the things she knew needed to be said herself. To show Fluttershy she could share the blame with her and be there for her. She also suspected it would do the mare some good to know that someone was willing to stay with her romantically despite some of her more anxious traits.
"I know you didn't want to come." She ignored an echoing roar that came from behind the personal bubble they had built behind the rock. "I know it's been scary for you. You've had to do a lot of things today that you're not comfortable with but at least you tried, right? I know it probably hurt your feelings when you heard Rainbow Dash questioning whether or not you should have come along. I know it probably felt like I was talking about you behind your back, and... I guess I was. I know I never even asked your opinion on any of this, and just sort of expected you to perform. I know you better than that. It was wrong, but Fluttershy..." She placed a soft peck to Fluttershy's cheek. "Do you know why I did all of that, though?"
Fluttershy never rose her head, nor did she speak but Twilight felt her head shake from side to side.
"I did it because I know you can handle it. Maybe my interactions with Rainbow Dash made it seem like I didn't believe in you, but trust me Fluttershy I do. If I didn't think you could do this, I never would have asked you to come along. You're much stronger than you realize, trust me on this. You're incredibly important to me, Fluttershy. I write to Princess Celestia about how strong you are all the time, I swear. I wish you could see yourself the way I see you. Then you could see how incredible you are. How much I l-"
Fluttershy's ears perked up.
"Twilight, we could really use your help up here!"
Twilight wasn't sure which of her friend had called her but she rushed to them, knowing that Fluttershy would understand. All hell was breaking loose and even hidden behind the rock Fluttershy could hear the dragon exit his cave. She afforded herself a small peek over the rock at the same time as her friends crashed into it. They lay in a pile before her with the large, red beast rapidly approaching them. Fluttershy's mind seemed to blank and she narrowed her eyes.
**
It had all turned out for the better, and the group had noticed small changes in Fluttershy. As early as the moment they'd gotten back from the mountain they'd noticed the changes. With just the six of them she had seemed more comfortable somehow, even teasing Rainbow Dash due to an unfortunate joke by Pinkie Pie.
Then even later on when it was just Twilight and herself she'd seemed proud of herself, something Twilight wasn't sure she'd ever seen. "Did you see me, Twilight?" She kept saying, unable to contain her excitement even a little. Twilight indulged her every single time too, if only to see the brilliant smile on her face each time she assured her that she had been very brave.
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Wow never thought Id see thsi story updated agin after 3 years.
Wow this Friday got better.
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Haha, indeed it has been a long time. I hope it's a good surprise, though :p
It is good that Pinkie and Dash seem to be reconciling. I think they make a great couple so them breaking up is something I always found sad.
Some things are changed around though, such as Pinkie Pie and Rainbow Dash knowing each other before Twilight moves to Ponyville.
You do know Pinkie knew Rainbow before Twilight because Rainbow lives in Ponyville and Pinkie knows everyone and is friends with everyone in Ponyville. Rainbow would have been living there for awhile before Twi showed up, because she is calling Ponyville her home.
You can say that they didn't hang out as much before Twilight bought the six of them together, it is even said in the first episode and your first chapter that when Pinkie met Twi she was shock at someone new in town because she friends with everyone living in town.
Sorry that bug me, rant over.
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Are we ever goign to see another or should I just remove this from my watch?
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Haha, I've actually slowly been working on the new chapter, it''s funn y you happened to comment when you did
Awwwwwwwwww, I adore this so much with how you've executed the TwiShy dynamic!
Aaaaand again a brilliant story from you. Please continue your amazing storys
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Fun fact. You posted this comment one day after my birthday