After Diner Confrontation

What happened after Trixie and Starlight's show? Well Twilight decided to try and fix things. However during the meeting with one very upset princess, Trixie's biggest mistake, and darkest secret will be revealed.

Chapters (2)

Comments ( 10 )

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Mooncalf

Mooncalf #1 · May 23rd, 2016 · 9 · · Hear No Evil ·

Ah... no. Sorry, no.

For one, Celestia is not one to stare down and intimidate her own ponies over something as trivial as a missed dinner. That's just not her.

For the other, Twilight is never this whiny. "You are supposed to be a villain!" Nope, she would not trivialize another pony's identity like that. Frankly, the way you depict her here, it's as though you're completely ignoring the very important realization she did at the end of the episode, technically just a few minutes earlier.

This was not an enjoyable read. Far too out of character.

OmniFox

OmniFox #2 · May 23rd, 2016 · · · Hear No Evil ·

She still didn't explain about where she got the Manticore.

The Bricklayer

The Bricklayer #3 · May 23rd, 2016 · · · Hear No Evil ·

Yeah, I have to agree with Mooncalf here. Twilight's just too whiny and Celestia just seems off.

icecreammac

icecreammac #4 · May 24th, 2016 · 4 · · Hear No Evil ·

You had me until Twilight's declaration of Trixie's "villain" status. That was way out of character for Twilight and immediately pulled me out of a pretty good read. Yes, I can see Twilight being upset that she missed a friendship problem despite her status as princess of friendship. But to condemn Trixie to a villain role? That was too much. Combine that with Trixie's little speech directly afterward, and it seemed to me like you were trying really hard to paint Twilight as some horrible pony and Trixie as some blameless, pure victim. It didn't sit all that well with me.

She didn't even change at the end, either. She and Celestia both went to get plastered, which really turned me off to the story. I'm not gonna leave a dislike, but I'm not gonna leave a like, either.

The Bricklayer

The Bricklayer #5 · May 29th, 2016 · 3 · · See No Evil ·

Yeah, I don't think you fixed the problems that I had with Twilight's personilty in the first chapter. She still seems far too whiny for me to take this story seriously and to just peg Trixie as a villain makes her seem OOC. Like Icecreammac said, it seems to me you're taking the Draco in Leather Pants route here with Trixie and giving Twilight the Ron the Death Eater treatment. I know this sounds harsh, but this story is not going to be going in my faves anytime soon.

MalekPony