Do That Again

by Bad Horse

Helpless!

“I’m going to destroy Hearth’s Warming,” Snowfall threatened again. “I’ll do it this time. I haven’t learned my lesson.”

“You’re bluffing,” the spirit said.

“You can’t afford to take the chance.”

“Chance of what? I can’t get any deader, sugarcube. Can’t get cold, can’t get hurt, heck, I can’t even get fat.”

“What about all the ponies still alive?”

“What about the double hooey still tied around your legs?”

Snowfall rolled and wriggled around until she could face the spirit properly. She lifted her head as high off the floor as she could. “I am a powerful unicorn,” she said, doing her best to glare imperiously at the spirit. It was difficult, because from this angle her hazy substance blended in with the white furnace smoke that crept along the ceiling. She suspected she might be glaring at Annie’s wrong end. “But, alas, while bound in your magical lasso, I am helpless!”

“It’s just a piece of rope.”

“You could do anything to me! Anything!”

“I guess that includes ignorin’ you, then.” The spirit turned away and began nosing at the potions and relics on the shelves lining the wall. Snowfall twisted her head to watch.

“Oh, that—that blue potion,” she said, as the ghostly mare peered at a crystal bottle with a neon blue potion inside. “You might like that one. It’s a—an—enhancer of hoof-eye coordination. Go ahead, try it. I’ve got plenty!”

“Is it now?” The spirit moved on to the next bottle. “Well, good thing my hoof and eye are already coordinated.”

“Also proof against mumps, rheumatism, ague, and bad breath.”

“So’s being dead. I never heard of a hoof-eye coordination potion. More likely ‘n not it’s a afro—afro—a love potion.”

“Well! Such a suspicious pony!” Snowfall pointed her nose up indignantly. It was only a potion of heightened senses. Sadly, it was the most-seductive elixir she had on hoof. If only she hadn’t scoffed at the aphrodisiac business! If only she hadn’t given that bottle of dragon nails to Snow Dash!

“Oh!” she called out in alarm, as the spirit bent over a small animal’s skull. “Don’t touch that! Did you touch it?”

“I don’t know!” Annie said, jumping back. “I can’t hardly tell what I touch no more!”

“Are you wearing anything cotton? If you touched it, you must take off anything you’re wearing made of cotton immediately!”

“My dress!” Annie yelped. “My petticoat!” She bent over and began tugging the ghostly garments over her head.

Snowfall rolled a little closer and propped her head up on a book that was lying on the floor to watch.

The spirit stopped, her head a smoke ring behind the translucent layers of dress and petticoat folded around it. A bright white apple mark shone on her flank.

She popped her head back out from the layers of material and turned a dark eye towards Snowfall, who smiled back appreciatively.

“Now, wait just a minute,” Annie said.

“I’ll wait as long as you want,” Snowfall sighed.

Annie shrugged her dress back on roughly and stomped over to Snowfall. “Listen, you,” she said. “I’m just doin’ my job here. I don’t want no romantic entanglements.”

“Oh, neither do I,” Snowfall said. She waved a rear hoof at the spirit. “Could you retie this? I got a little too excited, and it came loose.”

Author's Note:

Gotta run. I'll write the Exciting Conclusion after lunch.

Comments

[Shaded Changeling]

7217603 yes... Yes it is...

[swiftwriter14]

Wow i like the reaction of snofrost aka starlight glimmer shivers in fright is really funny and cute she like a cat shivering btw amazing fic

[QueenMoriarty]

I want to grammar-nazi this...

but it's quite obviously deliberately bad...

And kind of sexy...

so I won't.

[ForSpite]

Nice one-two punch of closing jokes on this chapter.

[zalla661]

So, is Frostfall going to off herself to love Annie?

[yamgoth]

It was difficult, because from this angle her hazy substance blended in with the white furnace smoke that crept along the ceiling. She suspected she might be glaring at Annie’s wrong end.

Y'know, considering what this story is about, you'd think that Sunset Shimmer would think any end is the right end. I mean Starlight Glimmer. I mean Snowdrop.

Gotta run. I'll write the Exciting Conclusion after lunch.

Not gonna lie, I have this really strong urge to change "lunch" to "poop break". Like, super strong. What?! Poop break just sounds hilarious.