• Published 5th May 2016
  • 1,229 Views, 12 Comments

A Solution to an Old Problem - Abramus5250



A reporter interviews Twilight Sparkle on a new bill concerning birth rates in Equestria.

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It All Becomes Clear

There comes a time on the life of many a mare when she wants to settle down and start a family. Part sociological, part biological, it is a drive that can drive out all others if strong enough. Yet, it is not necessarily a bad thing to feel this deep desire to bear a foal. Many scholars long ago declared that it was perfectly natural for a mare to wish to be bred, by their own volition of course. Those that thought otherwise were usually shunned by society as a whole, especially if they were fairly vocal on the subject. Likewise, mares that sought to have foals but without knowledge or even consent of a stallion were also fairly shunned.

So, as such, legitimate siring programs had been started in Equestria in the days long before Princess Celestia ruled the kingdom. The naturally-high number of females to males meant that, in order for mares to have at least one foal, they would have to join a herd.

This did not sit well with many, who saw herds as remnants of their more “primitive” side, the wild, primal side they wanted to forget about. Part of this inner “animal” was the fact that, in times of plenty, it made sense for a mare to wish for daughters, as they would be more likely to pass on their genes by giving birth to strong, healthy foals. That, and there was a biological component to the process that meant that, despite all of the technological and social progress made by ponies all over the world, female birth rates remained high, while male birth rates remained low. In some areas, females could outnumber males ten to one, and as such, herds naturally developed, but they were few and far between these days.

Nowadays, thanks to legislation and those willing to undergo the means of breeding, any mare could go, buy herself some time with a stallion, and be bred to her heart’s content.

There were problems associated with such a system, of course. Unwarranted or unlicensed breeding, such as those done under false identities or with the intent of suing for foal support by the mother against the biological father, meant that screening ponies was an entirely exhaustive affair for the ones that ran the process. Psychological care was also provided for the stallions who willing impregnated mares but signed contracts that meant they would likely never get to know their offspring, let alone meet them. Those that did not sign such contracts and were given permission by the mother to be a part of their foal’s lives were often the more likely to quit the program after a few years. Only the rarest of individuals stayed on after that, often citing family issues.

However, this day was a very special day. It was late winter, very close to an early spring, and seeing as an eleven month pregnancy was best brought to fruition by the beginning of the year, mares from all over Equestria would gather for these events.

That was what brought a reporter to the steps of the crystal castle within Ponyville, a local hub for this very much-needed process. Word was the new legislation had added a few new wrinkles into the mix, such as the allowance for males of other species to apply for such positions, as well as mares to serve as surrogates for couples who could not conceive on their own or were barren. She had come because her bosses had instructed her to, but she felt she needed to see this process for herself.

“Miss Sparkle, thank you for meeting with me. I am sure it must have been quite difficult to arrange this interview, what with your busy schedule.”

“Oh, it was no problem,” the lavender alicorn said, seated behind a desk. “I am always glad to make time for important things.”

The reporter adjusted her glasses. Rather matronly in appearance despite being only a few years older than the princess, Miss Prin Ter Paper had so far enjoyed a successful career in journalism, ranging from cover stories of scandals in Canterlot to the occasional piece about disaster relief efforts in a distant country. “Now then, Miss Sparkle, it has come to my attention that it was you that personally lobbied for passage of bill number 2016-5, correct?”

“Yes, the license to the care of surrogates and the setting up of a fund to help provide a means of reproduction for ponies wishing to have a foal. It really expanded on the original system, I must say, though I’m glad it did so without too much fuss.”

“Where did you come up with such an idea?”

Twilight smiled. “Well, as you know, magic can have both a beneficial and a negative influence on the lives of ponies all across Equestria. Crops grow better, weather is more influenced, and those who can wield it can perform all sorts of beneficial tasks. However, therein lies the problem. For all these good things, one side effect, more recently discovered by yours truly, was the effect it had on those who were highly exposed to it, either through contact with it or being connected to magic itself.”

“Sterility?” Miss Paper asked. Both she and her employers had thoroughly read the reports and the bill itself.

“Exactly. Magic can send much of the body’s normal processes into overdrive for some, or for others, severely repress them. It can even cancel out certain biological functions, thus rendering mares and even stallions into states of what could be called “magical barrenness”. Unicorns have the highest rates of infertility among pony kind, with pegasi being next, and earth ponies suffering almost no naturally-induced effects. That is the reason most earth ponies can have fairly large families, while others usually only have a few foals, usually one or two. The process can cause a mare’s eggs, even when “dropped”, to become impenetrable to a stallion’s sperm, or render a stallion’s sperm completely unable to move on its own. When I discovered these effects, I was sure there had to be a way to combat this problem.”

“So I heard,” the reporter replied. The decade the princess had spent finding solutions, or at least some form of prevention for this affliction of sterility, was perhaps one of the more groundbreaking scientific inquiries ever in all of Equestria’s history. Scholars and scientists from all over the world had convened with her, discussing and experimenting with magic and biology in many different ways. “Tell me, after the breakthrough your journals explored, what gave you the idea to set up this bill?”

“Well, seeing as sterility can affect many different ponies from all walks of life, no one small bill would have been enough to cater to or even cover them all,” the princess said. “So, a blanket measure was needed, and as such, it took me nearly two years of constant revisions, additions and outright rewrites to come up with what I believe to be the most comprehensive and successful bill I’ve yet to be a part of.”

“Some of your detractors say this bill is nothing more than a means by which to increase the fighting population of Equestria’s armed forces,” Paper said. “Most notably, leaders and speakers from other countries have been rather adamant that this bill will aid Equestria in dominating the political scene with a larger army within the next few decades.”

“Those same detractors have been saying the same for years, first on the reformation of Princess Luna, then on the alliance with the Crystal Empire, and then again with my ascension to an alicorn princess,” Twilight replied, rolling her eyes. “Besides, they are more often the aggressors in wars with other nations, and Equestria has had to step in many times to maintain harmony. They simply fear that they won’t be able to do as they wish as much.”

“What of the bill itself? Where does the funding come from?”

“Private estates have been very generous in setting up the accounts, as well as a small tax increase that will slowly be decreased over the next few years,” Twilight said. “The ponies who voted on the bill seemed rather fine with this depreciating tax, and as the funds are also supplanted by various charities across the country, I do not foresee any real problems funding the program.”

“So, you basically expanded upon an already-established network, as well as increased the resources available to those who partake in it?”

“Exactly.”

“Why?”

The princess sighed. “As you have undoubtedly heard, my magic is fairly powerful, both due to an innate strength and through years of training and focus. So powerful, in fact, much of my body’s reproductive system was placed in a state of suspended animation. It took so much longer for me to go into heat that I didn’t even realize I had been in it when it finished, and seeing as I’m not getting any younger…”

“You wanted a foal?”

“Yes,” Twilight said. “I so desperately wanted to be a mother, for a host of reasons it would take hours to explain. Suffice to say, I did all I could, though it became more of a fight for everypony, rather than a means of me becoming pregnant.”

“What did you come up with?” the unicorn asked, her quill rapidly twitching as it took down what the princess said.

“Several different things, the first and foremost being education,” Twilight said. “Many married ponies out there have trouble conceiving, for a variety of reasons. Some do not attempt to breed during the best times to conceive, while others are just starting out and do not know the full mechanics of heat and cycles. As such, our pamphlets, brochures and education seminars have certainly helped many out there conceive.”

“And for those that don’t?”

“Then we begin the next phase: namely, surrogates and adoptions. For those who simply cannot conceive of their own means, we find those willing to act as surrogates and give birth to foals who will then be taken in by that couple. This works especially well for couples that are not heterosexual, as my studies showed that, in the event of a mare magically giving herself a phallus, oftentimes the ejaculate will be sterile. For those that do make a fertile “batch”, the fetus rarely develops, and oftentimes is naturally aborted after only a few weeks. We still do not know why, but some research shows a portion of it may be related to methylation.”

“No way around that?”

“No, none that we’ve discovered so far, and frankly, I don’t see a problem with that,” Twilight said. “If we, as a species, were meant to be differentiated by that one feature, rather than a host, we surely would have become so by now. Regardless, our adoption and surrogates are extremely taken care of, and as such we have made many couples happy with their additions to the family.”

The reporter shrugged. She had been in several relationships in her career, on both sides of the aisle, but had never felt truly comfortable being with somepony. She did better alone, or at least, she thought she had, until recently. Paper knew her time for foal-bearing could run out within a blink of an eye, it was only a matter of exactly when. A safe pregnancy was the most important thing, both for herself and the foal. “What is the next step?”

“Oh, the original method,” Twilight replied. “If the female is receptive, but the male sterile or unable to “seal the deal”, or vice versa, we use the surrogates or the breeders to fulfill that aspect of it. The stallions who breed the receptive mares are contractually obligated to accept that the foals will not be theirs, though this only happens if all parties agree to the matter. If not, the sire is still the biological father, but the “real” father is the stallion who raises the foal. Likewise, the sterile mother is the “true” mother of a surrogate-carried foal, while the stallion remains the “true” and biological father.”

“Seems a bit complicated.”

“Oh, it can be, but everything is always taken care of before anyone begins breeding, to avoid legal drama,” the princess said.

“Okay, as for the last part, you mentioned in the bill allowing those of other species to fill in?”

“Correct,” Twilight replied, moving from her chair and around her desk. “I more or less thought of it on the fly, but seeing as inter-species relationships and offspring are common and accepted by society in this day and age, I thought a law allowing for more freedoms and a greater sense of security would be beneficial to everyone. That, and some mares out there are more than willing to have foals that aren’t full pony.”

Miss Prin Ter Paper was about to say something, but as the princess stepped more fully into the light, she noticed something… different. Her gait was slower, her hips wider, and there was a definite paunch on her stomach that had not been there when the bill was introduced. That, and a glow that seemed to emanate from every single hair in her pelt. “Your Highness… are you pregnant?” she asked.

“Yes, though I would greatly appreciate it if you didn’t tell anyone just yet,” the alicorn replied. “I’ve been keeping it a secret, hence my absence from the public eye after the passing of the bill. The reasoning for my inclusion of non-ponies for breeding pens was that, in my studies, I came across something extraordinary.”

“What was it?”

“Some species of sapient creatures are much less affected by the induced sterility magic can cause,” Twilight explained. “It took a lot of research, but I was able to narrow it down to one species in particular.”

“Which one?”

“Before I answer, Miss Paper, why did you come here?”

“To interview you, of course.”

“I know that your employers were interested in what I’ve done, but why did you come here personally?”

“I… you could say I’m a fan of what you’ve done,” Paper said, the slight blush on her cheeks peeking through her grey pelt. “I’ve come to the point in my life where I too would like to be a… mother, but… I’m just not sure if it could happen.”

“Why not? It worked for me, I’m sure it could work for you.”

“No, I mean… Your Highness, I have been in several relationships in my life, many of them intimate. Never once did I become pregnant, even with stallions who now, married years after we broke up, have had several, if not many, foals of their own. Obviously, the fault was not with them, but with me.”

“You’re afraid you could be suffering from a magically-induced sterility? Testing to ensure that magically-induced sterility is the culprit, and not simply a case of improper attempts can be fairly inaccurate at different times of the year.”

“Exactly,” the reporter replied. “I didn't want to drop every bit I have to find out, so, I came here… wondering… maybe hoping…”

“Hoping if I knew of a way to help you.” It was a statement, blunt to be sure, but filled with understanding. “Miss Paper, I think I know just the thing. You’ll have to trust me, though.”

“Of course, Your Majesty, I-,”

“Just Twilight, please.”

“Okay… Twilight. What would you have me do?”

“Follow me.”


The large breeding stables erected outside of Ponyville were one of a kind. Many other places had more temporary facilities in place, but the thing about Ponyville was that these events were tightly controlled. It was not about keeping ponies in, or anything nefarious like that. No, as Twilight explained to Miss Paper, it was more about keeping ponies, especially mares, out of the permanent facilities. “It was here that I made the discovery that allowed me to conceive,” she said as they passed through several security guards and into a vast atrium. Already, there were ponies lined up everywhere, either going over paperwork or waiting their turn: single ponies or couples, many mares but a few stallions, and even an occasional griffin.

“Follow me,” Twilight said, passing by a secure set of triple-reinforced steel doors. “As it would turn out, my selection has proven to be quite the source of rumors within this program.”

“So I’ve heard,” the reporter replied. “Is he nice?”

“He’s very nice,” Twilight said with a soft smile as they walked down a long hallway. “Nice, gentle, and very patient. You would not believe the number of mares that have specifically asked for him to breed them after word got out. I’ve had to turn many away, as he’s only reserved for the most desperate of circumstances, such as my own.”

“Why is that?” Paper asked as they reached a large door.

“Remember what you asked me, about which species was the most potent in terms of breeding?”

“Yes, I do,” the reporter replied as they entered the room. It was fairly spacious, partly in dark, though the smell of hay, freshly-washed linens and a myriad of perfumes lingered in the air. A shape moved from the shadows, and before she could react, Paper saw exactly what Twilight had meant by “non-pony”.

“Hello,” Spike said.

“Hey, Spike, everything okay?” Twilight asked, walking over to the dragon and nuzzling him.

“Better than a cave, I’ll tell you that,” he rumbled. Even on all fours, he was a good head taller than the alicorn, and likely three times as long, though most of that was tail and an elongated neck. “What about you two?”

Twilight looked at her stomach with a smile. “We’re both doing fine.”

“A dragon?” Paper asked, drawing attention from the two.

“Yeah, I’m Spike, a dragon. What about it?” he asked.

“I mean no offense, Mr. Spike, I just… I just didn’t know you’d be the one who was the source of the… rumors.” By Celestia, he was nothing like the little drake she had seen many years before, during one of her first news stories. He was so much larger, so much more defined, so much more… handsome.

“Yeah, I filled out, didn’t I?” he asked, flexing an arm.

Miss Paper felt her stomach drop. The definition of his, well, everything… it made her feel weak all of a sudden.

“Miss Paper, I am certain you have no objections?” Twilight asked, rolling her eyes at Spike’s flexing antics. Even now, years after he had filled out in all the right places, he still felt some strange need to prove himself.

“Objections?”

“You told me you wished to be a mother, and from what you have described, your body is incapable of creating life with the seed of another pony, correct?”

“That… that sounds about right,” the grey unicorn replied.

“Well, I’ll let you know, that a dragon’s seed is incredibly potent,” the alicorn said. “In my studies, I was able to introduce a dragon’s sperm into the zygotes of more than thirty different species of animals, some sapient and others not, and every single one of them successfully were fertilized.”

“Every one?”

“Yes, every single one. The magic contained with a dragon seems to even have a nullifying effect on magic in other creatures, meaning that, in a sense, he was able to induce my body to go into heat when we mated.”

“Really?” It had long been rumored that Spike and Princess Sparkle were closer than what others would assume, seeing as they had grown up together, but years before, Miss Paper had done an expose on adoption stories, and had found out that, technically, Spike was still under the parental care of Princess Celestia, even though she wasn't biologically related. So, the fact that he was raised with Twilight from a young age, but was part of Celestia's family, much like Prince Blueblood was, indicated that this new development wouldn't be as badly received as it once would have. That, and ponies were more accepting these days of couples from all walks of life.

“Yes, really,” Spike said. “What’s your name?”

“Miss Prin Ter Paper, Mr. Spike,” the reporter replied.

“Just Spike is fine,” the dragon said.

“Miss Paper, if there are no objections on your part, then I will leave you two alone for the time being,” Twilight said. “I have a few errands to run, I should be back by the time you are finished.”

As the door closed behind the princess, Miss Paper looked up at Spike. “So… how do we do this?” she asked, fidgeting slightly. Celestia knew she’d never been this nervous with any of her old flames, but this was her first experience with a non-pony.

“Tell me about yourself, and we’ll take things from there, gently,” Spike said, slowly walking around her, his body heat radiating like the glow from a roaring fireplace.


“Well, it sure is sad to see you go, but thanks for all the work you’ve done for us over the years, Miss Paper,” the editor in chief of the Equestrian Press said, rising from behind her desk. Young, smart, and full of wit, she was the youngest boss Miss Paper had ever worked for, even being a few years younger than herself. It was sad to know she was leaving her job, but now, times had changed, and Miss Paper was needed elsewhere.

“Well, I’ve saved up more than enough to look after myself, and besides, my brother offered to take me in,” the now-former reporter said, glancing at her stomach. The kicks were something new, but she didn’t deny they weren’t totally unpleasant. “His foals will have a new cousin to play with someday soon.”

“If you don’t mind me asking, who is the father?”

Miss Paper smiled. “A kind, caring, and gentle soul, though not exactly what you would call… normal. Think less hooves, more scales.”

“I see. Good luck to you, then, Miss Paper, and if you ever feel like you’re ready to come back to work, don’t hesitate to call me.”

With a nod, the pregnant mare left the Equestrian Press office behind, and slowly made her way down the street. All around, stallions and mares walked with foals of all shapes, sizes and colors wandered the streets, some of them bearing very distinct green spines or purple scales poking through their pelts.

Author's Note:

I originally came up with this idea for a clopfic of sorts, but ultimately decided against it, instead favoring a more world-building, slice of life-esque story that took a slightly in-depth look at why there are so many mares compared to stallions, and some possible explanations for such. I started this a few months ago, nearly finished, then became distracted and came back a while later to finish it.

Thoughts?

Comments ( 12 )

ah, you went the D&D route

uhhh uhhh.. this just makes Spike and Twilight's relationship even more confusing and kind of disturbing...

Meh, I liked it. Although I wonder...Spike sure has a lot of little ones running around... secret agenda much? Lol.

Ahhh man this bring up the memories of you work on Heritage god I miss that I mean I get that you got uncomfortable with but god dammit man is was good thought provoking work.

huh, this reminded me of that one other Spike breeding fic you wrote. Definitely well done, it's nice even without the clop. If i recall correctly, the previous fic made you uncomfortable, so it's nice to see you make an alternate one, even if it's not meant to be like that. Anyways, good job and i can't wait to see what you write next.

So in a few generations how much of the population will be related to Spike? I get the feeling that this could be a bad thing. However this was a great story have an upvote.

Commence read.

Interesting.

Nice bit of world-building.

Quite a coincidence of that bill's code/numbering?

Thing that bugged me was, the last quote not being spaced.

7189603 ...dammit. :facehoof: I uploaded this close to midnight, so I was a bit sleepy. It's been fixed, thank you for pointing that out.

She had come because her bosses had instructed her too

to. I love grammar.

This is a fascinating concept. The way you explore it is very interesting.

Two other quick nitpicks, though:

Is there any particular reason why the mare's name is Prin Ter Paper and not Printer Paper?

Also, the part of the story where Twilight and Spike are talking back and forth assuaging the meta concern of whether they qualify as family, feels a little clunky and rushed. Sort of like it's been squeezed in there to placate an audience rather than as a natural answer to a question.

7189948 Well, Prin Ter Paper, just because Equestria doesn't have actual printers. They have printing presses, but not actual scanning printers.

As for the other part... yeah, it is a little shoehorned in. I finished proofreading this at around midnight, so I did miss some stuff. I'll go back and try to smooth it out a bit.

7190453 Printing presses, the practice of printing, both of which could easily refer to their practitioners as printers since they don't have computer printers...

Basically, you could easily have the actual word instead of the disjointed version. And hey, considering the controversial nature of basically every other line of this story, I don't think anyone will be rushing to call the name Printer Paper anachronistic.

I liked it. You left the characters that we know, relatively, the same while still giving us something creative and likely possibility. I love when, Spike, keep the positive aspects of his character, and, Twilight, was done very well too.

And, Spike, being with only the most extreme cases was a welcome relief. Like him to be paired with different females but, not for this reason.

Good job!:moustache::twilightsmile:

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