• Member Since 24th Mar, 2014
  • offline last seen Yesterday


Not much to say about myself -- I'm an Irish guy whose interests include MLP, video games, and occasionally writing fanfics.


Of all the fields of business that one could choose to start a career in, very few are as cutthroat or as demanding as the food industry. It is a field marked by intense competition and razor-thin margins, where even the smallest error can mean the difference between success and failure.

But what if there was a way to avoid the stress and panic that can accompany such a demanding and competitive industry? What if there was a way to ensure beyond doubt that ponies would keep coming back to your business for your food, day after day? Would you not take it?

Well, one particular new entrepreneur decided to do just that, when he set up shop in the small town of Ponyville. He had an idea—an idea that would surely make his humble enterprise the most successful of its kind in all of Equestria. What follows is the tale of how it came to be, just what kind of effect it had on that little town... and how that little town became, in a certain sense of the word, a very big town indeed.

Wrote this on DA just about a year ago, and finally found the motivation to move it on over here. Enjoy!

Chapters (7)
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Comments ( 47 )

Good read. :pinkiehappy:

Ah, Hotshot we meet again. Anybody got an effigy of this bastard? I'm going camping and i have the marshmallows, chocolate bars and graham crackers, but i'm missing the CAMPFIRE.

7180211 Who needs an effigy? I've got a lovely collection of Hotshot voodoo dolls right here!

Breathing heavily, Bon Bon made sure he was out cold before unclipping her shades from her belt and donning them.

"I always did like my food extra crispy," she said smugly.

I had to.:trollestia:

7193330 Frankly, I'm astonished that nobody made that joke yet.

So, if Hotshot hadn't been stopped in time, how long would it have taken for Twilight and Thunderlane to have their weights measured in the thousands?

7204012 About a month, if that.

After what he did to poor Twiley, i'd be all for locking Hotshot and Shining Armor alone in a room together and letting nature take its course.

7206720 Wonder how loud his screaming would be?

"Alright, Shining, I'm going to leave you in here with Hotshot while I go for a ten-minute coffee break. Now, you see that baseball bat that just happens to be in his cell? I'm counting on you to make sure that it's put to the appropriate use while I'm gone. Oh, and by the way, the security camera has mysteriously stopped working. Have fun!"

This was a one of your best story so far, I love stories where the the victims fall pray to the magic. I wish that Hotshot has fallen victim of what he did to his customers in prison.

I'm curious how the blubbercup affected Tank looked cuz, y'know......shell?

7300734 Didn't think that far ahead, I'm afraid.

......Permission to pound this guy beyond recognition? :flutterrage:

Scumbags like Hotshot make Shining Armor very angry. ......You won't like Shiny when he's angry. :twilightangry2:

7346111 Are we talking "spilled his soda" angry or "kidnapping Liam Neeson's daughter" angry?

7346186 Considering innocent ponies had their money, free will, bodies and in many cases mobility taken from them, Twiley included, it'd be more like "Walking up to the Hulk and punching him in the fucking face for absolutely no reason" angry.

7346232 Or jeez, what if Shining had been one of the victims? Somehow, I doubt that being poisoned and gorging himself to this state...


...would endear Hotshot towards him very much.

......Be vewy vewy quiet. I'm hunting Hotshots. :twilightangry2:

"Bon Bon season!"
"Hotshot season!"
"Bon Bon season!"
"Hotshot season!"
"Bon Bon season!"
"Bon Bon season!"
"Hotshot season!"
"Bon Bon season!"
"I say it's Hotshot season, and I say FIRE!"

7377778 *taps horn* Huh.....No more buwwets. :derpytongue2:

You know, even if Hotshot hadn't been arrested during the cure, he still could've gotten slapped upside the face with a couple thousand lawsuits. Cue everypony in Ponyville ganging up on Hotshot and all hiring the exact same lawyer. Enter Cloudchaser and Flitter's uncle Legal Eagle, a very prolific attorney who has never lost a single case.

7398191 "Boy, I'm gonna stick my hoof so far up your ass, you'll be coughing up Lucky Charms for a month! I'll sue you so hard, your grandkids are gonna need lawyers!"

I have it on good authority that many of San Pal's inmates have loved ones in Ponyville. So.....sucks to be Hotshot. :derpytongue2:

7415106 At a conservative estimate, there's about half a dozen shivs with his name on them. And even if he doesn't get shivved, he'll most likely not walk away from any encounter with said inmates with his teeth intact.

7415106 Any idea how many broken bones he'd end up with?

Sometimes i have to wonder what went wrong in Hotshot's life to make him act like this.

7420741 Personally, I think he's just a sociopath.

Y'know being a dream walker, you'd think a certain princess would've realized something was amiss ages ago. Was Lulu just not doing her damn job for 3 months?

7429872 Hmm, you've got me there. Maybe blubbercup poisoning produces a deep, dreamless sleep?

You know, I just realized: We never got to see what happened to Rainbow Dash, did we?

This was a good story and all, but I think a better ending would have been if Bon Bon stuffed one of Hotshot's blubbercup laden foods in his mouth and gave him a taste of his own medicine.

7457169 I did consider that, but I decided against it -- that felt less like justice and more like revenge to me, and I firmly believe that there's a big difference between the two.

Shortly after the cure, Discord would flash in for a very long overdue tea time, only to see poor dear Fluttershy in a shattered sobbing heap on the floor. Have fun being the lord of chaos' new toy, Hotshot! *grabs popcorn*

7558246 Oh, come on, we're not that cruel, are we?

What am I saying, of course we are. :pinkiecrazy:

Oh, oh this was delicious. In terms of the food and the fat horse.

Usually I'm iffy about the fatness coming to an end, but it really worked here. Seeing Hotshot get outsmarted was pretty fun!

Though I'm not saying I'd complain if he made a prison break

7581763 The best part about writing a villain? Getting to decide what their downfall should be.

7582417 Very true indeed

Not to mention their comeback

I'm guessing Celestia's cure carries the same immunizing effect as the pears?

Fat Derpy.
:derpytongue2: there needs to be more derpy emotes.

I may or may not have torched Hotshot's home in a fit of rage. ......Why am I not in the least bit sorry?

7839912 That's okay, I already put lead in his water supply.

I just thought it would be funny if AJ, Apple bloom, and Big Mac where immune to the additive just for being Pears themselves?

Hmmm.......Whats Hotshot up too? Hurrrr.......

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