Changing Lanes

by AutoPony

Chapter 16

Luna's eyes stay locked on you even as she teleports your little group back inside your home, upon your insistence. The conversation you need to have with her does not need to be heard by anyone else, for Luna's sake.

"Anonymous, are you sure you are all right? You're worrying me," Luna says, her voice coming out a bit shaky.

"I'm fine Luna. In fact, everything is a bit clearer for me now," you snap, your mind swimming in a sea of anger. "So I'll ask you before I go completely off the rails, is there anything you want to tell me about my situation?"

Twilight watches the two of you with apprehension as Luna continues to stare blankly back at you. While she seems confused, you don't believe her for a second.

"Luna, I'm really getting tired of you lying to me. You lied to me about taking me to the Gala, you withheld the theory you had regarding our telepathic link, and now tonight... tonight is the worst yet."

Luna's eyes widen as she realizes what you are talking about.

"Anonymous, perhaps we need to discuss this in private," she mumbles, motioning with her eyes to where Twilight stands in the room.

"No, I think she deserves to know, too. Since you seem to think this is not something important to disclose, surely it won't bother you to let Twilight in on this," you say.

"Are you two done bickering? You're both acting crazy," Twilight grumbles.

"Twilight, would it bother you if a certain black alicorn was hidden away inside your head?" you ask.

"Well, I'd be a little freaked out if Nightmare Moon suddenly popped into my head, obviously," she replies with a giggle, before pausing. "Wait, are you saying that you-"

"Yes."

Twilight's demeanor instantly changes, circling around you in a flurry of energy, as Luna hangs her head low, her ears drooping in silent frustration and shame.

"But how? When did you see her? Do you see her now?" Twilight shouts.

"No, I don't see her now," you respond, keeping your eyes locked on Luna as she fidgets nervously. "I saw her when I managed to trip and fall, and black out. But according to what Nightmare told me, she has been trying to get my attention for a while now. Which only brings up a further question."

Bending over, you lean in towards Luna, until your nose is almost touching her muzzle.

"When did you know Nightmare Moon was not with you?"

As Luna tries to look away, you reach out with your hand and hold her chin, gingerly forcing her to keep her eyes locked with your own.

"When the reversal spell was completed, and I was back in my own body. I couldn't sense Nightmare Moon's presence as I had in the past. I thought maybe I had just grown so used to being without her for a couple of days, that I forgot what that sensation felt like," Luna says forlornly, before taking a deep breath, exhaling heavily with a sigh. "But then I saw her, a glint in your eye."

You let go of Luna as you stand up straight once again, clenching your jaw painfully as you resist the urge to blow your top.

"Why didn't you tell me, Luna? Why did you think leaving me in the dark was a good idea?" you ask, your voice flat and emotionless as you struggle to remain composed.

"I didn't think it would be an issue," she responds, with an air of nonchalance.

"You didn't think it was going to be an issue? What the hell does that even mean, Luna?"

"I didn't mean it the way that you think I do, Anon," she replies, her brow furrowing. "What I meant was, Nightmare Moon cannot do any harm to you like she could when you were in my body. She's not used to the way your mind works, she doesn't know the ins and outs."

"And you think I'm going to believe that, after all the cascading lies you've handed me before that?"

"I never lied to you," Luna protests, growing a bit angry herself at the accusation.

"When we got everything back to normal, I asked you if you had Nightmare Moon taken care of, and you told me everything was under control. Clearly, it's not," you shout, throwing your hands in the air.

"It is fine. You are over-reacting, Anonymous," Luna protests, turning away from you as she remains calm and composed. "I knew you would lose your composure, it's why I didn't tell you in the first place."

"Over-reacting? How the hell am I supposed to be reacting to this?"

"Like somepony who has a bit of self-control," she growls back, staring daggers into you. "I meant well by keeping this from you, why can't you see that?"

Wonder if she felt she had good intentions a thousand years ago, too, you think to yourself.

At least, it was meant to be a private thought.

Luna suddenly gasps, her anger suddenly twisting into a pained expression as she rises to her hooves.

"Luna, are you all right?" Twilight asks nervously.

"I... I should go," Luna replies quickly, her gaze cast downward to the floor in front of her.

"Luna, wait. Stop," you say as she turns away from you, her horn lighting up with her magic as she prepares to teleport. "I didn't mean it!"

Leaping forward, you try to grab Luna, as her whole body glows white. Unfortunately, you aren't quick enough, as you fall to the floor where she stood only moments before, gone in a blinding flash.

"What was that all about?" Twilight asks, staring at you as you pick yourself up off the floor.

"I need more practice keeping my thoughts private when I'm stressed, I guess," you sigh, making Twilight freeze in place.

"What did you say?"

"I may have considered she thought she had good intentions a thousand years ago before her banishment," you reply, hanging your head in shame.

You feel forcefully shoved down onto your couch by an unseen force, before Twilight jumps atop you, her face lined with restrained anger.

"What were you thinking, Anonymous?!" she shouts, loud enough that it hurts your ears.

"I wasn't, I didn't mean it," you mumble before you feel your own temper begin to simmer once again. "Why did she have to lie to me Twilight, answer me that."

Your question causes Twilight to back off, slipping down to the floor as you sit upright. Her brow furrows as she mulls over your question.

"Anonymous, between you and me, I'm a little worried myself," she says, barely above a whisper. "I understand Luna says Nightmare Moon poses no risk to you, but this is still a serious matter and something that should have been discussed rather than hid under the rug. I don't know if all her time...... away, has made her somewhat oblivious to how things can affect others, or if she's just afraid of hurting you. She's gotten a lot better with her social skills in the short time she's been back, but Luna still has a ways to go."

"So you're on my side, then?"

"I'm not on anypony's side," Twilight replies, shaking her head. "I think both of you have reason to be upset because you both are in the wrong. Luna for keeping all of this to herself, and you for letting your temper get the best of you."

You slump back on the couch, dropping your head in frustration. Twilight is right, you've let your temper cloud your judgment once again. Even if you hate to admit it.

"Are you going to be okay?"

You look back up at Twilight, her ears drooped back as she frets.

"I'll be fine," you say, playfully ruffling her mane with your hand as reassurance, easing her anxiety. "I just need some time alone to think."

"Yeah, it's getting late," Twilight concedes, peering out the window at the far side of the room. Only a few stragglers are out milling the streets at this point, the majority of tonight's festivities likely over.

Turning around and pointing towards the door, Twilight pauses and glances over at you again.

"Are you sure you're okay?"

"I'm fine," you reply, waving your hand. "Have a good night, Twi."

With a solemn nod, she opens the front door and steps out, leaving you alone with your thoughts.

As you slump back on the couch, surrounded by darkness, your clock hits the top of the hour, letting out a foreboding chime that echoes through your empty home.

---

A low rumble carries through the night as you make your way at a leisure pace down the road.

While others may find the Superbird to be a loud nuisance, you have always found the deep tone to be relaxing. Whenever you feel troubled, you tend to take a slow cruise to get some thinking done.

Tonight has certainly been a disaster. You're still a bit peeved at Luna for hiding that she knew Nightmare Moon was with you, but you moreso feel the regret of how you reacted towards her. You tried reaching out to her a couple of times through the link, but each time came the sensation akin to a door being slammed in your face.

Through all of these troubling thoughts, you find yourself whether you can even trust her to tell you the truth anymore.

"Maybe she would be willing to trust you with troubling information if you didn't fly off the hook every time she tried to explain something," a voice calls out from within the car.

You jump up in your seat a bit as you jam the brakes, the car lurching to a standstill as your head snaps around, your eyes settle on a rapidly expanding mist in the seat beside you. As it grows and contorts, it settles upon a form as it takes a solid form, until you are looking at a mirror image of yourself.

"What the hell?"

"Relax," your doppelganger replies flatly in your own voice. The thing closes its eyes for a moment before snapping them open, revealing a pair of icy blue, feral eyes. "It's just me."

You relax a bit as your fear subsides, only to be replaced by irritation as you point your eyes forward and get the car moving again. "So I'm dreaming again, I assume? Why do you have to make it creepy as hell?"

Nightmare Moon huffs, closing her eyes as the for sitting next to you fades to a starry blue mist, shifting and contorting once again until forming into her normal appearance.

"No, you're not dreaming," she replies in her normal, feminine tone, leaning back in the seat with a smug expression.

"Bullshit," you snap back, already frustrated by Nightmare's arrogant demeanor. "You said yourself I have complete control over my mind, so how can you just appear to me like this?"

Nightmare Moon rolls her eyes as her smirk disappears.

"Yes, you do have control. However, you seem to lack control over your emotions. That lack of control gives me a little crack that I can gain a hoofhold upon and pull myself through, though not without a fair deal of effort," she bitterly concedes.

"So you just figured you would add to my misery by gloating at how poorly the night went? Wonderful," you grumble back, revving up the engine and dumping the clutch, the Superbird darting forward.

You had hoped to throw off or startle Nightmare in the seat next to you, but a quick glance shows she is undisturbed.

"Do you really think that's the reason I popped in?" she asks, her tone sounding almost pained as she frowns.

Dropping the car into high gear and settling at a leisurely pace again, you turn to the black alicorn seated next to you.

"Why else would you be here annoying me now? You're the one that started all this crap tonight, you're the one that started all this misery years ago when you possessed Luna and well full world domination mode. Let's not forget, of course, the hell you put me through when Luna messed up that spell and I was stuck with your sorry ass for a few days."

Nightmare Moon remains stoic through your rant but quickly speaks up as you finish, her voice calm.

"Let me start off by saying I started nothing tonight. I merely gave you information that you lacked and Luna was unwilling to divulge. What you did with that information, I had no control over. But believe me, I didn't want to listen to you mope inside your head all night. As for the rest of your outburst, I don't even know where to begin," she says, chuckling a bit at the end.

Once again, your anger simmers as you pull off to the side of the path, shut off the engine, and coast to a stop.

"Well, you better find somewhere to begin, because I'm tired of these games. Exactly what the hell *are* you?" you demand.

"I'm you, why is that so hard to understand?" she asks innocently.

"Cut the shit, right now," you snarl, leaning towards her. "All you've been since I met you is an arrogant pain in the ass. If you want me to listen to you, to even believe you aren't here just to make me miserable, you're going to tell me what you are. I've heard a lot of theories, I want it straight from the horse's mouth."

Nightmare's eyes narrow, scowling for a moment before she turns her head away from your glare.

"First off, I'll pretend you're too stupid to realize 'horse' is considered a derogatory term around here," she bitterly retorts. "But to answer your question... I am Luna, in a quite literal sense."

You lean back towards your side of the car, slamming the steering wheel with a clenched fist.

"Of course, more mind games. What else is new?"

"I'm not done, you impatient mule," Nightmare snaps, drawing your attention back to her. "If you're not going to shut up and keep an open ear for five minutes, why should I bother wasting my breath?"

Biting your tongue before you hurl back an insult, you take a moment to reflect on the night thus far. You haven't been doing much thinking or listening tonight. Perhaps it's time to start.

The car remains silent for a while before Nightmare begins to speak again, facing away from you and towards her window.

"Luna - or should I say, we, were miserable for a time when we had to stash away our own hopes and desires for what Celestia called 'the greater good of Equestria.' That was painful enough, but to add upon that ruling beside your older sister? Whom everyone else adored more than you? Misery does not begin to describe it."

"Why didn't Luna just tell Celestia how she felt?" you ask with genuine curiosity. Nightmare Moon turns to face you, surprisingly devoid of emotion.

"Being the older sister, Celestia had a bit of an issue listening to her sibling from time to time. Luna decided it was not worth the effort to bring up her own problems, as it would only serve to make herself look jealous and selfish. So, she bottled up that frustration. Telling no one, for a time. But at some point, one has to vent such anger, and in periods of isolation, Luna would let it out to the only pony she could trust to listen and agree. Herself."

As she continues, Nightmare's eyes seem to glaze over, as if she is looking beyond you and visualizing what she speaks.

"Of course, such a release can be beneficial. But when you become your only audience, your only shoulder to cry upon, your own being can emerge into a separate part of yourself. Especially after years of such behavior. Continuing to do so can slowly warp your own conscious until it begins answering back, offering comfort. Taking a form all its own."

"Hold up," you say, stopping her before she can continue. "Are you trying to tell me Luna pushed her own sanity to the brink and created you? Some sort of perverted tulpa?"

"I see somepony is well-versed in their folklore and mythology," Nightmare teases with a smirk. " To think mom said those old stories couldn't teach you anything."

"And how the hell would you know anything about me or my past?" you demand, irritated by her tone. Admittedly, you're also irritated that she's right.

"Well, I don't have the key to the city, but the library is public access," she replies, pointing to your head. "I decided to help myself to some past memories for my own amusement."

You can only fold your arms in front of yourself and glare in disapproval as Nightmare Moon flashes you a rather mischievous grin, showing off her fangs.

"Get used to it, we're roommates now," she taunts, before returning to a more serious demeanor. "Anyways, I suppose I started out as a tulpa, even if I find that a rather belittling term. But over the years, Luna and I would discuss her anger, her sorrow, and I comforted her as best I could, all the while trying to come up with a way to help her with her problems as I began to think for myself. Whether it be the stress from all that pent-up rage, or trying to balance both of our personalities, Luna finally reached the breaking point."

"And the rest is history, I suppose," you add, garnering a solemn nod from Nightmare. "But why are you telling me all of this information? Not your history, I asked for that, I mean what Luna was trying to hide from me, that you're crammed inside my head now."

"Because Luna is going to lead to her own self-destruction again if she keeps lying her way through this," Nightmare grumbles, much to your surprise.

"Why do you care? I mean, the two of you don't seem to have a happy relationship anymore."

Nightmare Moon's brow furrows as she mulls your question, hesitant to respond for a short spell.

"As much as I despise being ignored, I came from a desire to help her, to help myself. I suppose that desire still remains inside of me, a bit. Which is why I'm passing on this information to you."

"So you can get attention?" you ask, loading your inquisition with sarcasm as you look forward out the windshield.

"So you can help her, you idiot! I'm trying to help the both of you," Nightmare Moon snaps back. "If you couldn't deduct from everything I've told you that she has major trust issues, you're as hopeless as she is."

"Joke's on you, I figured that out a while ago," you reply.

"Joke's on you, you've been talking to an empty passenger seat," she says. You turn your head to the right just as you hear Nightmare Let out a chuckle, almost sinister in nature, echoing away into silence.

A bit unsettled by the realization you've been conversing with someone that was never there, you shake it off as you start up the Superbird again, grabbing the wheel and the shifter and whipping the car around in a quick u-turn. As you row through the gears and head for distant lights far on the horizon, your mind goes over everything you've learned tonight.

---

It takes close to three hours to reach Canterlot's castle, leaving your joints a bit achy even before you begin climbing the flights of stairs to the sisters' private chambers.

One good thing about being unique in this world is everyone knows who you are just by a quick glance. You have no issues getting past the guards as you pass by them in the halls, offering a knowing nod of the head as you wave to them. But now as you reach the final few steps, you're almost hesitant to go on.

Even with all that time to think, you don't have much of an idea what to say to Luna. Apologize for getting so angry with her as well as the comment are obvious no-brainers. But do you tell her what you have learned to try to help her let go of some of the stress? Or will that cause more issues? Surely she will want to be filled in on what made you understand what she's been through.

In the end, you decide to play it by ear, as you reach Luna's closed door and knock lightly.

"Luna?" you call softly.

With no response, you try the door handle, which twists freely in your grasp. Gingerly, you push the door open a way, poking your head through the gap. While it is dark in her room, enough light filters in from the balcony for you to make out Luna's bed, and a form lumped underneath the covers.

"Luna?" you call again, a bit louder than before. The sheets jostle around the form on the bed in a frenzy, before Luna's head pops up out of the mess.

"Anonymous," Luna mumbles in surprise. She rubs her eyes as you slowly make your way into her room. As you get closer, her disheveled mane and rather red-tinged eyes would tell she did not go to sleep on a high note, if you didn't know that already.

"Hey Luna," you say quietly, unsure of where to start. You stop at the foot of her bed.

"How did you get here?" she asks.

"I drove here. Took a while, but... well here I am."

"Why?" Luna asks as she drops her gaze downward, her tone flat and almost demanding in nature.

"Judging by what I've said and done tonight before traveling here, I'd say I'm a pretty stupid person," you say, biting your lip. "I'm sorry, Luna."

"You really came all the way out here just to say you're sorry?" she asks, not believing what she's saying. She tries to make some sort of order out of the tangle of blankets before giving up, ushering you to sit down next to her with a wave of the hoof.

"Well, yeah. I mean, I wanted to say something through our link, but..." You trail off as you sit down, kicking off your shoes before bringing your legs up onto the bed as well.

"I was afraid of what else you might have been trying to tell me," Luna replies, her voice quavering just a bit as she reminisces the events of earlier tonight. You seize the moment to put an arm around her and pull her next to you in a gesture of comfort.

"As I said, I can be pretty stupid sometimes. Especially when I lose my temper," you admit. "I need to work on that. But it wasn't fair of me to get that angry with you in the first place. I mean, I really wish you would have told me before I found out for myself. But in reality, other than the shock of it, nothing has happened to me thus far. I haven't exploded or anything."

For the first time since you've arrived, Luna's somber demeanor breaks, offering you a small smile for a moment before it fades.

"I suppose I still have some issues regarding trust that I still have yet to resolve," Luna admits, as you nod in understanding.

"From what I've heard, you've been dealing with those issues for quite a while."

Luna's eyes narrow at you in suspicion as you mentally kick yourself for saying that.

"What do mean, 'from what you've heard?'" she inquires.

You figure there's no sense in lying about it if you are trying to convince Luna to be more open with you. Time to practice what you preach.

"I... Nightmare moon talked to me tonight. Before I headed here. Sort of gave me a brief inside story of you and what you've dealt with," you say, almost in a whisper.

Luna's eyes widen as you watch her process the bombshell you just dropped on her. She remains silent for a time, almost as if in a trance.

"You okay, Luna?" you ask, becoming a bit unsettled by her silence. Luna finally shows some sign of life as she shakes her head, bringing herself back to the conversation.

"I'm just surprised. Shocked. Now I know how you felt tonight, I guess," she replies with a slight chuckle. " But I would not recommend continuing to speak with her, even if she was the catalyst for you coming here tonight."

"Why's that? I'm not necessarily disagreeing with you, I just assume you have a reason."

"I just don't believe it is a good idea, is all," Luna says in a cryptic manner, making your heart sink a bit. There must be more to it than that, but after making amends, you don't want to push your luck.

"Okay," you agree. In the back of your head, you feel a twinge of anger seemingly pop up out of nowhere. Deep down, you know it isn't your anger emerging, but someone else unhappy with your agreement.

"And I am sorry as well, Anonymous," Luna says, wrapping her forelegs around you and she hugs you tightly. "I will try to be more open with you in the future."

A sudden, loud snort breaks the silence, making both of you jump a bit.

"What the hell was that?" you whisper, as Luna just chuckles.

"My sister, in all her nightly glory. I am surprised you never heard her snoring when you were me for a time. Perhaps she tried her best to stop it from happening, knowing that you were not me at that time."

"I definitely would have heard that, I'm not THAT heavy of a sleeper," you reply, before shaking your head. "Anyway Luna, I'm sorry your special night got wasted on our squabbling."

Luna chuckles as she waves off your apology with a hoof. "Do not fret, there will be plenty more Nightmare Nights to come. They can not all go off without a hitch. But the celebration does not end until the sun rises, there are still scares to be had."

Luna eyes you with a smirk, before her eyes dart to the right, nodding her head to the door. You can only chuckle when you get what she's trying to tell you.

---

As morning breaks, you and Luna make idle chat in the dining room over a cup of coffee, as Celestia finally strides through the doorway.

Or perhaps stumbles through the doorway would be more appropriate, as the normally cheerful white alicorn yawns loudly, barely paying any attention to the two of you.

"Good morning sister," Luna sings in a giddy voice.

"It is morning, yes. I'm not sure how good it is right now," Celestia mumbles, levitating a coffee mug out of an open cabinet. Carefully, she pours herself some of the steaming brew out of the pot on the counter. Setting the full mug on the counter, she quickly chugs the rest of what is left in the coffee pot, as you and Luna exchange amused glances.

"Anonymous, I'm surprised to see you here." Celestia chips in as she dabs her snout with a napkin.

"Yeah, I decided a sleepover with Luna would be fun tonight," you say with a smile. Meanwhile, Celestia's vision narrows, darting between you and Luna.

"You wouldn't happen to know anything about my room being spontaneously afflicted by a poltergeist last night, would you?" she asks tepidly.

"I didn't hear anything last night, Tia," you say, doing your best to keep a straight face. All eyes turn to Luna, who is biting her lower lip.

"Sister?" Celestia asks as she raises an eyebrow.

"They say the veil between the world of the living and the world of the departed is at its thinnest on Nightmare Night, dear sister," Luna says.

Celestia's eyes narrow as she slowly shuffles towards her sister.

"Mwahaha," Luna chuckles in a sinister voice, grinning widely as she sports a pair of slowly growing fangs.

Author's Note:

Not dead, guys and gals. Been keeping the wheels turning one sentence at a time as I've binged on my other hobbies in the past couple months. But I knocked out the last 1k words in this chapter the past two days, so maybe (hopefully) I'll be doing some binge writing for the next couple weeks.

Comments

[Luckyfanisaac]

as the form sitting next to you fades to a starry blue mist,

You turn your head to the right just as you hear Nightmare let out a chuckle,