This story is a sequel to Memento Mori
I have seen the mare who does not sleep.
Shall I tell you about her?
(Written originally for the Writeoff Association. The Prompt was "Forbidden Knowledge".)
Chapters (2)
Cynewulf
Joined 5th Dec, 2011 ·
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Wow. That is all I can say about this story, you are extremely talented in a
kind of way, but it's a great story. Keep up the good work 
Man, I remember when Memento Mori came out it was one of the first stories I ever read on here. It's nice to see it get a sequel.
Also, some typos.
You're probably looking for either "living" or "alive". Just "live" doesn't seem to fit.
Then?
7190531 it's been a long time, huh?
Very good in the Writeoff, and glad to see it posted here.
(I should note that the change in perspective bugs me less now that it's in two separate chapters. But I still like Chapter 1 better.)
7190634 yeah, one of the benefits of being able to separate it.
I agree, to an extent. If the whole story had been like chapter 2 it would have fit a lot better.
All of my yes. And all of my goosebumps.
Very delightful. Very reminiscent of H. P. Lovecraft in all the right ways.
I enjoyed it quite alot, and I hope there's still a little more to go, for my own selfishness.
Either way, keep up the excellence.
Not in fear. Only in rage.
And even then, it was because I allowed it.
I have burned out the core of fear from my mind. It can no longer exist. The animal is dead. I am ascended.
And of course it's Twilight. It's ALWAYS Twilight. As if she alone will always fall into this hopeless darkness of evil magic which somehow always endures and always tempts her to delve into it. Naturally, of course, there is nothing which can counter it either because everyone adores Lovecraft despite his oft rambling nature and innate fear of advancement. That's the problem with stories like this. It's everything I expect it to be. Horror must somehow subvert my expectations. Yet none can manage to outmaneuver my mind in the arena of madness. I am its master, of course.
And so, I have god-moded far beyond the reach of necromancy, for I have stolen the Ultimate Nullifier from Marvel and the Anti-Life Equation from DC, and infused them both into myself to become the Ultimate Anti-Life Nullifier... which naturally makes me able to kill the undead. Because, magic, whatever. (I can't feign seriousness this long, sheesh!)
*And so Alondro walks up to Demonlight and just smacks a mare bitch* STOP... (WHACK!!)... GIVING... (WHACK!!!)...INTO... (WHACK!!!)... EVIL!!! Seriously! You are the WORST main protagonist character EVER!! You don't see Saitama becoming an undead loon, do you? DO YOU?! Frodo was stronger-willed than you! A freakin HOBBIT!! You suck!
*Twilight gallops away in tears for failing the Troll King*
Neither darkness nor light can comprehend me.
I... am fifty-ONE shades of grey!!
And all worlds are now MINE!!
(By the way, since this Equestria is doomed, I've just tweaked its quintessence a tad to the spiral and the whole cosmic fabric tore itself into oblivion. So, it's all gone now! I have God Science... I CAN REWEAVE THE TAPESTRY OF CREATION ITSELF!! REWRITE THE VERY EQUATIONS OF EXISTENCE!! I am unstoppable!)
I always find it hilarious that people celebrate darkness because they fear it. I do not jest when I say I fear nothing. The darkness holds neither power nor fascination for me. It is merely a state in which there is insufficient light for my eyes to work well.
And blah blah blah, I have ultimate powers and an untouchable and yadda yadda... the usual.
I love me some well done Lovecraftian horror. Although I can't help but feel that the 'terrible secret' Twilight revealed is that they're in a cartoon made to sell toys.
7191595 you know, I had that thought while writing?
7191603 To be fair, knowing that God works at Hasbro would drive me insane.
Fitting reference.
7191651 was hoping someone would notice that
7192259 huh. Is it in? I have mature on.
Oh and thanks!!
Well, Celestia's plan worked, I guess. This future could be argued as less bad than the other one.
This is what I imagine happens to anyone who makes it out of Silent Hill alive.
Hmm.. yes, I see.
Another story to add on to the NOPE pile. Awesome.
In all seriousness, this was... good? No... it wasn't good. It was horribly amazing. Well done, in any case.
Now I need to go find a bubbly comedy so I can sleep tonight.
7200098 I find the best palate cleanser is reading The Call of Cthulhu with every adjective replaced with the word "spooky". Hilarious! Also in a way better.
7200112
That... actually does sound really funny. Might have to give that a shot...
Wow, this was amazing. But at the same time a little confusing. If someone could summarize the story so I can see if I missed anything, I would really appreciate it.
What if twilights motivation is her first day in ponyville and she just pretended to get over it?
7206928 then holy hell she's as bad as Rarity fears.
I am terrified, and impressed you got me so spooked. I'm nearly at the end of tonight's horror binge.
7200098 I'm off to reading more horror. It's like skydiving.
Damn I cant even hold my bread right.
The only question i have left is what does Twilight want? Building a city, controlling the town, and hiding their very existence from the others.
...Sequel?
Nice and creepy piece of horror, this one. Green fire is unsettling; the Fel magic of Warcraft, the radioactive blaze of Ligier the Green Sun in Malfeas, the imagined glow of nuclear waste, or the green-glowing eyes of Sombra. Lots of Sombra parallels, I noticed, like the endless stairway to beneath the earth, and the crystalline cathedral built by enslaved ponies...
7375192 I wonder to what extent they are slaves at all.
Stumbled upon this while on a mlp horror binge. Could use a bit more editing but other then that I think this story is great. I had a nagging suspicion that Rarity had not come away unscathed. The most damning detail was when Rarity switched from saying 'Her' to just straight up 'Twilight' in that one line during her narrative. My respect for your storytelling went up a few notches from that alone when I spotted it. Keep doing what you do man and I'll keep reading.
Heh, nice Darkest Dungeon lines. Would have slipped by had I not memorized that entire opening.
7375196 In the shadows cast by truest dark, wherein that which lingers is worse than the specter of death's pale hand, what is left of life?
Do they even remember enough of themselves to be anything but puppets? And after such fel horror, could they be anything but obedient to those gossamer strands of will? Perhapse it's best not to dwell on such matters. To rest in the light, and cast away the night's horrors.
And keep an eye on your shadow, too.
Horror tens to just make me shrug my shoulders and plan to blow up whatever world is featured.
It's amazing how powerful eradication of all fear makes one.
Whatever this is - it's brilliant. I love it. Very spoopy.
7191526 I have to say that I agree; because really?
That's probably the most pathetic load of bull; Twilight constantly falling so easily.
7819698 And yet people can't believe that Luna fell on her own and have to keep inventing reasons it was Celestia's fault or mind-control by demons.
If ultra-goodie-two-shoes nerd Twilight is a believable gullible patsy, then CERTAINLY whiny 'Wah wah! Nopony pays attention to me!' Luna could go nuts all by herself!
I'm trying to get back into pony fiction lately, and this piece reminds me that I've been away too long. If the Pony Print Project ever releases a second volume of horror stories, this should be in it.
So, she kept herself from killing Rainbow and managed to only destroy Ponyville this time?
Man, you have such a way with words!
It's really well written and the suspense really works, but what was the point of any of that? what's the thing that twilight realized that made her build a city?