• Published 24th Apr 2016
  • 21,007 Views, 3,732 Comments

What I Am - Knight Breeze



Somewhat confused at the recent turn of events, Alex desperately tries to find his place in this strange, yet familiar land. However, dark powers loom on the horizon, threatening to destroy not only his new home, but his old one as well...

  • ...
41
 3,732
 21,007

Chapter XXXV

Chapter XXXV

I don't know how long we stood there, locked in each other's embrace, her body pressed into mine. It could have been years for all I cared, and because of my implants, it would have been so easy for me to make the moment last at least that long. I didn't want that, though. The last thing I needed right then was a reminder of how inhuman I had become; all I wanted was to enjoy the feel of her form pressed into mine, and the way her fingers trailed in little circles around the small of my back.

Sadly, nothing can last forever, and after far too short a time for my liking, Valerie pulled away, her eyes sweeping up and down my form. I couldn’t blame her; I was taller than I used to be, but I was also much, much ganglier.

I was also an unspeakably horrifying monster from beyond the stars, but at this point I was just splitting hairs.

As I stood there, just drinking in the sight of her, she gently reached up and rubbed her hand over my bald head as her lips turned down into a frown. “I liked your hair…” she half-muttered to herself.

“I did, too. Trust me, I wasn’t presented with the option to keep it,” I replied dryly. “I got it back for a few days, but… it didn’t keep.”

Valerie looked confused at this, as she should have. “You… got it back? I don’t understand. Alex, what happened to you? Really?”

“It’s a long, long story, one we really don’t have time for.” This didn’t seem to satisfy her, as I knew it wouldn’t, but it was the honest truth. “Look, you deserve answers, you deserve my full story, but that’s something that’s going to take days to tell properly. Right now, people I care about have hours at best.”

"Uh-uh, you're not getting away with a half-assed explanation like that," Valerie said, tapping her foot angrily. "You're going to sit down, get some snuggles, and you are going to tell me everything."

I tried to protest, tried to say anything to stop her, but anything I tried was ignored as she gently, but firmly, pushed me back into the couch and curled up in my lap like a kitten. "Now, tell me," she said, the look in her eyes slightly threatening. "What happened to you after you disappeared?"

I knew that we really didn’t have time for this, that people's lives were at stake, but the feeling of her warm body cuddled into mine was just too good. It brought to mind memories I had all but forgotten, of seeing her for the first time, the first time she smiled at me, our first date which, while admittedly started off pretty rocky, was nevertheless one of my fondest memories with her. She smelled slightly of flowers, which brought to mind rainy nights curled together, sipping cocoa and laughing at really bad movies.

It was no surprise, then, that when I opened my mouth, I began spilling my guts, just as she asked. I had the presence of mind to keep to the cliff notes version, but I still spent way too long talking to her about the horrors I had been through, about my miraculous escape, and about how me and my fellow experiments had fought tooth and nail for our freedom.

Valerie was a good listener, too. She didn't interrupt me even once while I went through the terrible things the krin did to me, and I couldn't see even an ounce of judgement when I told her about what they forced me to do. I did, however, notice that she became progressively more angry with each word that came out of my mouth, and something deep inside me told me that it wasn't just because of what I had gone through.

Something else was bugging her, of that I was certain.

I wanted to ask her about it, but something kept me from taking that step. Instead, I selfishly kept talking about myself, telling her about the wonderful alien ponies that had saved me, and about the danger that now threatened them. I knew I should have asked her, should have said something, but it was like a dam had burst, and I couldn't stop talking until I had gotten everything out.

I don't know how long we were there, as there were no clocks in this room and I still hadn't figured out how to make the implants in my head show such a feature, but it must have been at least a few hours. Finally, I drooped, having expended myself completely and utterly. “And… that’s why I can’t stay…” I said as I gently ran my hand through her hair. “I know it sounds crazy, but… they need me. Even if all I can do is stop a single shot with my body, I still have to go. They gave me my voice back, they gave me one last chance to see you again. I can’t repay them by turning my back on them, not now…”

“You don’t have to go alone,” Valerie said as she gently traced circles on my chest.

I looked down into her wonderful grey eyes, and I could see tears welling up in the corners of those beautiful orbs. “What choice do I have? NATO’s just going to spend it’s time arguing, and I rather doubt the U.S. is going to move without them.”

“I meant me, dingus,” she said, lightly punching me in the arm. I winced in pain, my inhibitors having been set to a lower level despite my injuries, as the higher levels could mess up my brain if left on for too long (that had been a terrifying text to see running across the bottom of my vision, believe me). Valerie was exceptionally observant, though, always had been. It was why she had done so well in college, and why she was a forensic scientist. Because of this, she picked up on my expression immediately, pulled away from me, and gave me a stern look. “Alex… what’s wrong with your arm?”

“It’s nothing,” I replied, trying to shy away from her ever so slightly. She wasn’t buying it, and immediately started pulling at my jacket, fully intent on getting it off of me. “Look, I was banged up a little… It’s nothing, I swear!”

She completely ignored me, and other than getting physical, I really had no way to stop her. Before long, the black jacket I was wearing had been removed, and the red stain on my shirt from where I had bled through my bandages could be clearly seen. “Alex… You’re hurt! You were thinking of going back to a warzone like this?

“Of course,” I said, not backing down despite the shame in my heart. “My nanites have been working overtime, so the gunshot isn’t nearly as bad as it used to be. The other arm is basically-”

“You were shot?

“Yes, remember this face?” I reminded her, using a finger from my other hand to gesture towards my ugly mug. “Well, when I first got here, the portal opened up in the Smithsonian. The guard there really didn’t take too kindly to my sudden appearance, or my face, despite the happy mask I was wearing to hide it. He was pretty fast on the draw, which is a good thing, all things considered, but he only managed to wing me."

This didn’t seem to make her any happier, judging by the look on her face. "And you were just going to run off with this and get yourself killed, then?"

"I was already dead when they found me," I answered her, my voice completely level as I stared into those beautiful, grey, accusing eyes. "Believe me, seeing you one last time is, by far, more than I could ever wish for… but I owe them more than just my life. I owe them my ability to speak, my sanity, but most importantly, I owe them for my return home, however brief."

Valerie turned away, anger in her eyes. It was clear that she wasn’t happy, and honestly, I knew her pain. It would have been so easy just to say ‘screw them’ and stay here, with her. To hide away, and pretend that the krin wouldn’t come, that the last year had been nothing more than a nightmare.

I couldn’t do that, though. Not only because I wouldn’t be able to face myself in the mirror if I did that, but because I wouldn’t be able to look her in the eye again, either. If I turned tail and ran like a coward, I wouldn’t be able to live with myself.

She had been the only thing keeping me from hurling myself from that cliff while I had been alone. I rather doubted that I could keep myself from such a fate if I ever saw disappointment in those lovely grey eyes of hers.

“...I have to go.” I said, before I gently untangled myself from her, picked up my coat, and turned towards the door. I took a few steps forward, my mind made up, but stopped when I felt her arms gently encircle me.

"Alex…" she whispered, her voice filled with tears.

"I can't stay… there's too much at stake, and if I ran like a coward…" I trailed off, not wanting to finish what was on my mind.

"But why do you have to do this alone?" she asked, her voice sounding strained and tired. "Please, at least take me with you. Let me see these people who did so much for my fiance."

Her words stopped me in my tracks. It had been an offhand comment during my speech in front of the United Nations, but I had been quite serious when I had said I was thinking of asking her to marry me. I had even picked a ring out, and was planning the perfect proposal.

She had apparently taken me as completely serious, too. There was only one problem with that, and it was a really big one. "Valerie…" I said, before I turned and gently enfolded her in my arms. "You don't know how happy it makes me to hear you say that…"

"...I know there's a 'but' in there somewhere."

"There is, but-"

"No 'buts'! Do you love me, or not?" she asked, her eyes blazing with an inner fire.

"More than you could ever know."

"Then what's the problem?"

I sighed a little, before I looked away. "How many children do you want?" I asked, my voice catching ever so slightly. "Because frankly, I'm pretty sure I can’t give you any."

The silence that followed this was deafening, and I could feel her eyes boring into me. I couldn't meet her gaze, though. I couldn't let her see how weak and small I felt. "Listen, Valerie, you deserve happiness. You deserve the world. You deserve a white picket fence, a devoted husband, and a swarm of loving munchkins to bring joy and chaos in equal measures. I'm a broken, penniless alien bioweapon who was used in countless war crimes. What's more, my former masters are probably still looking for me. You don't deserve that kind of baggage, that kind of emptiness, that kind of life. You are, by far, the greatest thing to ever happen to me, which is why I want you to go. Go find someone who makes you happy, someone who makes you laugh at bad movies, someone who will keep you warm at night, and someone who will listen to you when you need an ear… and just forget about me. It would make me smile to see you heal, and move on. Just promise me you'll tell my parents what happened to me. They deserve to know." I tried to leave, tried to untangle myself from her warm, loving embrace, and leave her to her normal life, but I couldn’t. She held on to me too tightly, her nails dug into my back, and I could feel her tears on my shirt. “Valerie, please, just-”

“Shut up,” she said softly into my chest. And so I did.

We just stood there as she softly cried into my chest, her arms around me, while I fought with myself over what to do. I knew that it would be a stupid idea to comfort her, that it would make letting go of me all the harder, but I couldn’t help myself. As if they had a mind of their own, my arms slowly reached up, and encircled her in a soft, but firm, hug. My mind screamed at me, telling me that this was absolutely the wrong move, but my heart ignored what my head was saying, and instead called out to her. It called to her with every fearful moment, every lonely night, begging, pleading with her to stay with me.

Finally, she pulled away and looked up at me, her hand brushing my cheek as she stared into my dead, soulless eyes. “Alex, I don’t want someone else. I want you.

I tried to say something in response, tried to tell her that she wasn’t thinking clearly, that her emotions were getting the better of her. My heart, on the other hand, promptly told my brain to take the largest, sharpest, spikiest polearm and shove it where the sun didn’t shine.

Because of this inner war between my heart and my mind, I found myself utterly powerless as she stood up on her tippy-toes, took my face between both of her hands, and pulled me down so that she could press her wonderful ruby lips to mine.

An eternity passed, then another, as I tried desperately to process this impossibly amazing, yet incredibly simple gesture. Electricity seemed to travel from the point of contact and earth itself into my spinal column, and every sensor I had in my head seemed to be in overload, the krin wiring apparently ill prepared for such a human gesture. I don’t know how long I accidentally made this moment last, nor did I care. If I spent the literal rest of my life, stuck in this position, I would have absolutely nothing to complain about.

However, all good things must come to an end, and unfortunately, this moment ended far sooner than I would have liked. With a slight blush to her cheeks, she gently pulled away, then smiled up at me with all the beauty of a rising star. “Now, why don’t you take me to meet these wonderful people who returned my fiance?” she asked again.

This time, I found it rather hard to argue with her.

* * *

"So, anything new?" Conners asked as he and his command team entered the lab.

Doctor Phillips looked up from the statue he had been examining, before letting out a sigh. "Well, it's a beautifully constructed statue from ancient greece. The museum said that it was taken to Britain during the Roman occupation, and-"

"Doctor, you know full well what I meant," Conners said, before giving the scientist the evil eye.

"I don't know, okay!" the scientist shouted, suddenly becoming very irate. "I've pointed every tool I have at my disposal at this thing, and everything I've got says it's nothing more than a normal statue!" Phillips then quickly moved towards a nearby table before scooping up a pencil and throwing it underhanded towards the statue's square base.

The pencil traveled in a predictable fashion, right up to the point where it encountered the surface of the stone. Instead of bouncing off like it should have, the pencil instead passed straight through, causing the surface of the rock to ripple as if it were water for a few seconds before becoming still.

"Eyup. That's magic, all right. Gonna have to ask the aliens on the other side how they did it," Conners said in an off-hand manner.

If anything, this caused Phillips to become even more upset. "Conners, I cannot condone you or your men walking through that thing. We don't even know if it's safe, or what the long-term effects of… 'magic' on the human body are. For all we know, you'll grow another head in three years, or suddenly explode, or-"

"Or we could get superpowers. That could be pretty sweet," Conners said, his voice still completely level. "Though, to be honest, a second head could be pretty rad."

"You could eat two ice creams at the same time!" Lieutenant Blacks suddenly piped up, causing the other members of the team to nod in agreement.

"That would certainly make watching the kids easier," another muttered, his demeanor just as nonchalant.

Doctor Phillips eyed them all in disbelief. "How can you all be so flippant about this!? You're about to step through an unknown anomaly, on the word of a monster, all to help some alien horse people that might not even exist! This is clearly a trap, and you all are just going to… waltz right into it?"

Conners let out a sigh, before fondly letting his hand rest on the barrel of his FN SCAR-L. "Well, if it is a trap, we'll be packing a few surprises of our own. After all, it would be pretty rude of us to not spring such a trap, especially after they went through all that trouble to set it."

"Colonel, your weapons will mean very little if this is a trap," Doctor Phillips said, clearly not enjoying the colonel's sass.

"And if it isn’t a trap, and we don’t act, we will lose a valuable ally, and perhaps our entire world. Losing me and my team seems a small price to pay for those kinds of stakes."

Conners knew the doctor wanted to keep arguing the point, he could see it in the doctor’s eyes, but he also could see that the doctor knew it was pointless to argue, since the decision was ultimately out of his hands.

After a few seconds of this impromptu staredown, Doctor Phillips finally relented, throwing his hands up into the air in defeat. "Fine! Go then! Get yourselves killed! I don’t even know why I bother to talk to you meatheads!"

Conners just smiled in satisfaction. He was now forty-seven to ten in the staredown game, only having lost to his mother, the undisputed champ. "That’s always fun… But sadly, we can’t leave just yet, not until we have our translator."

"Where is the little horror meme, anyway, colonel?" Lieutenant Blacks asked as he scratched underneath his chin. "I half expected him to be waiting outside the room."

"He'll be here. I just gave him something to distract him for a while, though I am a bit surprised that we still managed to beat him. However, if my intuition is anything to go by, he should be showing up right… about… now!” Conners said, before pointing towards the entrance that he and his team had just entered through. Much to the colonel’s chagrin, the door remained closed, completely killing the anticipation that he had raised in his men.

"Your timing's off, Colonel," Blacks said in a disapproving tone. "I've come to expect so much more from-"

As luck would have it, that was precisely the moment that the guest of honor chose to show his face. He wasn't wearing his mask, which allowed all present to see his horrifying mug, as well as his flabbergasted expression as he caught sight of everything, and everyone, who was crammed into the relatively small laboratory. "What… what's all…?"

"So close…” Conners muttered as he snapped his fingers in mock fury. He then brightened up considerably as he quickly closed in on the alien bioweapon. “Alex! Just the man I was hoping to see! We're ready whenever you are, so if you'd like to lead the way, we can get this shindig on the road!"

Alex was understandably confused, though the lady next to him was significantly less so. Instead, Valerie had a smug smile on her lips, as if she had expected this to happen, despite the fact that Conners hadn’t even hinted to her about anything of the sort. “Thank you, Colonel. You don’t know how much this means to us.”

Alex, on the other hand, didn’t seem to want to let it pass, though. His eyes kept darting towards the colonel, to his men, to the relatively small amount of munitions and supplies that had already been moved into the room, and to the various Army soldiers that were inspecting and preparing everything for transport, before finally coming back to the colonel again. “But… but… NATO… you said… and we… no help… but… what?”

"NATO still said no. They're not coming, at least, not right now," Conners confirmed, while sadly shaking his head. His smile never left him, though, and only got wider as he reached up and tapped the side of his nose. "We don't answer to NATO."

"But… your general said you didn't have the manpower to fight this war…" Alex muttered, his voice barely heard as tears began to well up in the corners of his eyes.

"And we don't. It'll be difficult getting some of the bigger guns through the portal, too. By all accounts, the odds are stacked against us… but then, when has that ever stopped the United States before?" Conners said as he threw an arm over Alex's shoulder. "What, did you really think we'd let you run back and take all of that fun for yourself? My boys were insulted when they heard you were going to be that selfish."

"Your boys…?"

“Oh, didn't you hear? My entire brigade signed up for this mission. In fact, the entire U.S. is basically chomping at the bit after your little speech in front of the United Nations," Conners said as he gently led Alex towards the portal. Valerie stayed close behind, her smirk only growing with every step they took towards the stone statue. "Let me tell you, we've honestly got more volunteers for this than we know what to do with. They're all gunning to go, but we don't want to scare the locals. So, if you'd be so kind as to introduce us, we can convince the horses on the other side to get us a staging area. After that’s done, we can finally get some of this gear through, establish a basecamp, and start kicking some alien ass."

Alex kept looking around, his eyes wide as he tried to take in everything, before his face finally broke out into an ear-to-ear grin as tears freely streamed down his face. "Thank you, Sam. I… I really don't know what to say…"

"Best not to say anything at all, and just get moving…" Conners said, before giving the former human a shove towards the portal.

Alex clearly wasn’t expecting the sudden push, and quickly disappeared as he pitched face-first through the liquid-like stone surface. Conners gave Valerie a quick look, but one glance was all he needed to know that she was coming, too. "You're not staying long. Just a quick thank you, understand? We'll have enough to deal with without having to worry about another civvy."

"I'll be quick, in and out," she promised.

"You better, or I'm going to have you thrown back through," he said, right before she disappeared.

Conners then turned to his men, his eyes filled with mischief. “Alright, boys. I want you all on your best behavior, understood? And Blacks, no poker with the natives.”

This got a smattering of cheers from the colonel’s team, but Lieutenant Blacks seemed a bit put out by the colonel’s order. “Come on, colonel, why you gotta be a buzzkill like that?”

“Because he’s tired of having to cover for your sorry ass,” another one gufawed, before chuffing the other officer upside the head.

“You’re damn right. Move out!” Conners shouted, right before stepping through the apparently solid stone, and onto another world entirely.

A world that, while completely unprepared for the sudden invasion of humanity, desperately needed it.

Author's Note:

So, here's my latest chapter! Understand, please, that I am not in the military, and any mistakes here are by complete accident. I've done a little research, and it said that Colonels command brigades, or groups of men in the 5000-9000 range, which sounded about right for what I wanted, so that's why he's a colonel. I've been questioned as to whether he commands the 75th, and all I got to say is I have absolutely no idea.

I've also had some conflicting information on what weapon he should be carrying, so if you'd like to correct me on that as well, please let me know in the comments.

Anyway, I'm just trying to do my best here, and a lot of the deeper stuff seems a little harder to access, or a lot more reading than I'm willing to go through for my bare bones, first draft, not published on amazon version. Trust me, though, when we reach this part in the published version, I'll be putting in a lot more research.

I'd still gladly take any input/correction you guys would like to give me, so for the moment, I'm publishing this as is so I can move on to the next chapter.

And let me tell you, that one's gonna be a doozy.

The normal links:

My book:
=> What I've Become! <=
My patreon
And that tvtropes page that Alias_The_J made.

On to the next chapter!!