Spike's Doom and/or Destiny

by terrycloth

Farmer's Fields

Travelling through the grass made it easier for the evil chickens to sneak up on them, but it didn’t make them any more dangerous. There was a bit of a scare the first time Moondancer used ‘Dark Eidous’, but the grass wasn’t nearly as flammable as it looked.

Derpy estimated that they were halfway to the source of the smoke, when they stumbled across the farmhooves. They were the very image of country earth ponies, with plow harnesses, straw hats, and even bits of straw hanging from their lips for them to chew on.

The yellow one looked them up and down. “And just what the heck are you supposed to be, dressed up all fancy like that?”

“We’re heroes!” Spike said.

“You can tell because of how many chickens we’ve killed,” Bon Bon added.

The blue earth pony spat. “You been killing our chickens?”

“We had to!” Derpy said. “They were evil!”

“Typical,” said the red one. “Let’s teach these ‘heroes’ a lesson about sticking their muzzle in where it don’t belong.”

“Eeyup,” said the blue pony, rearing up and then slamming his forehooves into the ground. There was a noise like thunder, and the earth shook and cracked beneath their feet, as a rippling wave of tremors shot towards the party and left them off balance.

While Spike was reeling and trying to keep his feet without dropping his sword or shield, the red pony rushed forwards with an angry yell, and bucked him right in the face. Well, right in the shield. Which he was holding up to protect his face. It still knocked him back a few yards.

Moondancer held up her staff, pointing it at the blue pony. “Dark Eidous!” The lightning struck the yellow one, instead, but didn’t take him down. He shook off the shock and took a tomato out of his saddlebag, popping it into his mouth and healing himself.

“Allied with the nameless one, are ye?” the blue one snapped. “I’ll put you in the ground!” He stomped again, sending another shockwave at them.

“I really don’t want to hurt you…” Derpy said, taking her cutlass in her teeth. “This is all a misunderstanding!”

But the rest of the party was already fighting. Spike and Bon Bon double-teamed the red pony while Moondancer said “Dark Eidous” over and over, shooting more random lightning. As a bolt slammed into Bon Bon’s target, momentarily distracting him, the sneaky cook slipped around behind him and swung her jewel-encrusted ladle at his leg. There was a sickening crack, and he fell to the ground, screaming in pain.

“Eddy!” said the yellow farmer. “Let me get you some –“

“I don’t think so!” Spike said, leaping forwards sword-first and stabbing him in the side of the neck as he turned to get another tomato out of his bag.

The yellow pony screamed. Spike screamed, and let go of his sword, stumbling back as blood sprayed everywhere. The farm pony managed to get a hoof on the blade, and yanked it out of his neck, staggering and falling to the ground. With the last of his strength, he managed to crush the tomato between his own teeth, and the wound started to heal over, the blood slowing to a trickle.

Spike picked his sword back up and pointed it at the wounded pony. “Stay down, okay? I don’t want to have to stab you again!”

The blue pony managed to send out one last shockwave, that made Moondancer stumble and twist her ankle, but with his friends both down on the ground he seemed to draw all the lightning, possibly by virtue of being the tallest target. Bon Bon somehow appeared on his back, and clonked him over the head, downing him.

“Why did you fight them?” Derpy asked, kneeling down by the pony with the broken leg. She had a muffin she’d summoned, but wasn’t sure if feeding it to him would be a good idea.

“They attacked us!” Spike said. “We didn’t have a choice.”

“I don’t see what the problem is,” Bon Bon said. “They’re obviously evil farmers, if they own such a huge flock of evil chickens.”

Derpy frowned. “They don’t look evil.”

Bon Bon snorted. “Neither did the chickens, until they attacked us. That’s how you tell.”

“So anypony we fight is automatically the bad guy?” Spike asked. “That seems kind of…”

“Convenient?” Moondancer suggested, smirking.

“Yeah, what she said,” Spike said, “only in a bad way.”

Bon Bon rolled her eyes. “If we fight them and they’re not evil, then they’ll join us after we beat them. That’s how this sort of thing works.” She walked over to the yellow one, who was still conscious and not actively writhing in pain. “So how about it? Care to join our cause?”

He spat in her face. “Go to hell, demonspawn.”

Bon Bon glowered as she wiped off the spittle. “Definitely evil. What do you say, Derpy? Want to skin them and see if the armorer can make you a suit of pony leather?”

Derpy glared back at her. “No.”

“Then let’s get moving,” Bon Bon said, leaning down and yanking off the pony’s saddlebag of tomatoes. “Don’t forget to loot them.”

===

After that, they ran into more chickens, and then a group of chickens accompanied by a farm pony, this one a green pegasus who hovered overhead on a cloud and managed to lasso Spike and drag him up off the ground. Derpy bucked the cloud, bursting it and sending him and Spike tumbling to the ground, where Bon Bon and Moondancer beat him to a pulp with ladle and staff.

Derpy winced as she looked at what was left of their attacker. “Did you have to break his wings?”

“Didn’t want him flying back up out of reach,” Bon Bon said.

“Did you have to break both his wings?” Spike asked, looking a little nauseous as he struggled to free himself from the ropes he’d been wrapped up in.

Bon Bon scrunched up her nose a bit. “I thought it would take the fight out of him.”

“It must have worked,” Moondancer said. “He’s not fighting.” She clonked him on the head with her staff again. Since he was already unconscious, he didn’t react.

Derpy finished untangling Spike, and took the lasso in her mouth, swinging it around experimentally. “This is harder than it looks,” she said, finally managing to get it in a tight circle that at least kept the loop open. She twisted her head sharply to try to throw it at Spike, only to feel it yank against her wing as she accidentally looped herself. Trying to pull it off only pulled it tighter, so she flopped on her side and tried to pry it off with her hooves…

Spike and the others watched her for a while, until she was completely hog-tied. “I guess one of us should help her?” he said, uncertainly.

“No, wait!” Derpy struggled against her bonds, wiggling helplessly. “I’ve almost got it!”

===

Finally, they emerged from the endless grass into a small mowed lawn in front of a farmhouse. The farmhouse was on fire. The crops past the fences were on fire. Some of the fences themselves were even on fire. The farmer was not on fire, but she was rushing back and forth from the well in a panic, and failing to make much headway on saving her house.

“What’s going on here?” Spike asked.

“It’s chaos! Pure chaos!” the farmer cried, stopping to talk but hopping back and forth on her hooves, impatiently. “Ever since the meteor hit, out behind the old barn, the cows have gone mad! They’re attacking everypony and setting fires! My farmhooves all ran off when I tried to get them to fight! You’ve got to find out what’s going on and save my farm!”

Spike grinned. “Sweet! It is a sidequest!”

“I assume you’ll reward us, if we help?” Bon Bon asked the farmer.

“Anything!”

“I don’t know,” Derpy said. “Should we really be helping her?”

The other three looked at her in confusion. “I expected you to jump at this sort of thing,” Moondancer said. “We’re wasting time helping ponies.”

“But she was farming evil cows,” Derpy said, shaking her head. “She kind of brought this on herself.”

Comments

[howard035]

I would game with Bon Bon any day. She knows anything that gives you treasure and XP is probably evil.

[terrycloth]

7170393

[RowynII]

Derpy bondage scene eeee! :D