Enforced Insanity
Tohru sighed to himself as he followed along behind Finn, Chao, and Ratso. Valmont and Shendu were very upset with their failure to acquire the Rat Talisman or eliminate Jackie Chan. As such, they were tasked to wander around the city of San Francisco - on foot - with the Talisman Tracker in the hopes they might stumble across the Talisman. On top of that, Shendu could track the movement of the artifact as long as it was intact, and would know if they stayed in one spot for too long. If they did so without calling in an explanation, they would be in trouble.
At this point, Ratso was the only one who still had a smile on his face. Finn was surly as usual, and Chao was still nursing a sore shoulder from the Fort Knox incident, and winced every time his foot came down on the pavement too hard. Tohru was already feeling a little winded from hefting his body so far. Even if the vast majority of his bulk was pure muscle - his last physical showed him with only a 15% body fat index, very good especially considering his size and weight - it was still a great deal of effort to move it long distances without taking a break. He could manage a surprising sprint, but he was no marathon runner...although he still remembered the one time he'd tried to run a marathon and technically won by rolling. Ratso, on the other hand, was irrepressibly cheerful and saw the whole thing as a relaxing outing. As such, the others had stuck him with artifact duty.
"Whoa!" Ratso suddenly murmured, coming to a halt as the artifact started shaking in his hands, all four heads illuminating in sequence. "What's this mean?"
Tohru stared at the artifact for a time, then decided to ask. Pulling out his communications device, he made a phone call. "Master, the artifact is...behaving oddly."
As the screen showed Valmont and Shendu, Valmont spoke up, plainly irritated. "How so?"
Deciding it was more efficient than trying to describe it, Tohru pointed the camera at the artifact.
"I suggest you all take several steps back," Shendu spoke up. "The Talisman is either above or beneath you, and approaching rapidly, under the guidance of some other form of magic."
All of them immediately backed away. The artifact continued to shake, but now only one head was illuminated. The pavement in front of them began to crack, and unearthly chanting began in a low murmur. A black shape about the size of a Great Dane burst out of the ground, all writhing tentacles and oozing flesh. In appearance, it seemed to be a nightmarish fusion of octopus, man, and dragon.
"Aww, it's a tiny Cthulhu!" Ratso cooed happily. "It's so adorably unholy!" To the shock of his companions, he reached out and attempted to scratch it on one side of its squishy dome head, only for it to writhe and lash at him. "Huh, guess he's not friendly."
"Cthulhu?" Shendu demanded, his voice somewhere between angry...and terrified? "How do you know that name?"
"Oh, I've read all of Lovecraft's books," Ratso admitted happily. "They're really funny, especially when you know enough about his psychological problems to recognize the derivation of the ideas that went into the story and contrast that to just how many people take the stories at face value as a genuine mythos instead of recognizing it as a look into the mind of a suffering madman-" He stopped as he realized everyone was staring at him. "...what?"
Shendu seemed to sigh. "Why are mortals always opening the doors to their own undoing?" he grumbled ruefully.
"Wait a minute!" Ratso suddenly interrupted. "If this is Cthulhu, shouldn't we all be going mad now?"
"It is not the true Ruler of R'lyeh," Shendu corrected. "It is only a facsimile, likely created from the Rat Talisman falling into one of this...'Lovecraft's books. Because of the nature of the Old Ones, any tome containing knowledge of them will have enough of a connection to them to act as the mental aspect of a spell, if the proper other elements are involved." His statement was greeted with silence, and he sighed irritably. "All spells are made of physical, mental, and spiritual components. One must have all three for a spell to work properly. The Talismans act as shortcuts when used individually, as they possess a great store of spiritual energies. When activated, they use the chi of the wielder to provide the physical aspect - however large or small - and the shaping of the wielder's thoughts as the mental aspect, triggering the spell form. This is why they activate more readily when one knows what they do. In the case of the Rat Talisman - which brings motion to the motionless - the shaping of the object provides the mental aspect, and the energies of its manufacture provides the physical."
"So...this is not the true Cthulhu, but the Rat Talisman animating a book?" Tohru clarified as the creature lunged for a car, tearing it apart and hurling the chunks aside, slowly growing as it did so before racing away, too fast to follow.
"For now," Shendu hissed. "Because of the nature of the Elder Ones' connection to this plane of reality, the mental aspect draws from them. The Rat Talisman provides more than enough spirit...but if it causes enough destruction and death to absorb sufficient body magic, the summoning ritual will complete itself, and the spirit of the Lord of R'lyeh will be called from his sleep to infuse the facsimile, and it will become the true Elder King. And then he will tear open the veil that keeps his brethren from entering this world, and they will battle here to determine who shall rule anew...and that battle will consume this world and more."
"I don't think we want that," Finn murmured worriedly.
"The mission in this case has changed," Shendu hissed out. "Your priority is to get the Rat Talisman out of that facsimile, using whatever methods you find viable. If this means joining forces with Chan and his Qi Lin, so be it, even if it means they leave with the Talisman at the end of this. There will always be another opportunity to recover it if they take it. There will not if the ritual completes itself."
Tohru and the others looked surprised, but Tohru couldn't say he wasn't pleased inside. It was an opportunity to maybe get to know the little ponies, instead of always having to battle them. "It shall be as you say," Tohru confirmed.
"One more thing!" Shendu hissed. "So long as that thing is active, you are not to speak my name. Speaking my name will bring me to its attention, and my destruction would instantly provide it with the necessary body element to complete the ritual. As well, you are not to speak my name where that chi wizard might learn of it."
"Understood," Tohru confirmed as he hung up. As the group now made their way to the antique shop, he made a mental note of that discussion. Apparently, Shendu's name would somehow provide the chi wizard with an advantage against the Demon Sorcerer. Tohru did not like the statue creature, and only did his bidding because Valmont willed it, as he was the present client. However, should that ever change...Tohru now knew a way to spoke the stone dragon's wheel.
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Huh... Okay, show of hooves, should we have a separate 'One More Thing' tracker for Shendu and/or villains, or lump it with that of our friendly neighborhood chi wizards and heroes?
Hehe... someone's sweating in their stone prison.
And Tohru cuddling the CMC! Artists make it happen! 
connection to this plain of reality
1. Plane.
Winning a marathon? Tohru can roll with it.
I can imagine that our little Cthulhu is just bursting for some more screen time.
Well, Cthulhu really did need some iron in his diet.
Well this bit with Toru is interesting...One more thing Ratso being a fan of Lovecraft is awesome plus that bit with Shendu actually saying one more thing was a nice development...
...Ratso, Hagrid, and Fluttershy need to get together. No, the opposite of that: they must never meet.
you know it's bad news when Shendu wants to work with the Chans and okay with losing a tailsmen.
Okay, if Ratso is that smart why is he working for Valmont again?
7605594
I vote we should have a separate tracker and a total/overall tracker. I am not sure of when others said it in the show, but I recall it happening in the one with the Chi vampire, so why not!
7605625
It pays well and he has no applicable job skills beyond being the diplomatic face of the Enforcers?
Well then, talk about the enemy of my enemy.
7605613 SECONDED!!!
The enemy of my enemy is my enema.
This should be...entertaining.
7605629 I'd buy that reasoning.
To answer RazDelacroix, my vote is running totals for both teams, plus chapter victors.
Right now, team S is ahead 1 to 0, team C not being in this chapter.
Alright! Enemy Mine situation inbound!
7605629 He probably didn't complete his theoretical physics degree, either.
They keep abusing Tohru and he's gonna swap sides, and that's what I'm hoping for.
Chapter Fifty
"Aiyah!"
Chapter Count: 0
Total Count: 29
"One More Thing!"
\
Chapter Count: 1
Total Count: 57
7605594 An interesting idea but 1) no one outside of uncle really says any of his tag-lines often enough to make me want to track them separately, 2) doing so would mean my having to backtrack through each chapter to hunt down the three or four out of fifty seven times someone other than Uncle said "Aiyah" or "One More Thing", and 3) out of those three or four times, I don't think any of them were from the same person twice.
7605625 Probably because it's good money. Valmont is rich, and intelligence doesn't require morality or ambition.
Great, now even Shendu is doing it. That One More Thing quote is like an infection!
Shendu following the whole 'I can't conquer the world if it is already destroyed!' logic, gotta love Villains that get stuck doing heroic work because of that.
7605806
Righto then! Carry on!
I thought "One more thing" was Uncle's thing
7605629
When the series aired, this would have just been a comedic plot device
. Now? I know guys with B.S. degree, made honors in school, that were stuck with jobs like fast food and Wal-Mart because that's all that was available and B.S.'s don't count as much as they once did
. So, yeah, this could definitely be plausible
.
This fic annoys me purely for the fact that you stretched Uncle's face horizontally in the cover art.
derpicdn.net/img/view/2012/12/8/176573.png
7605935
I didn't make the cover art. The one who put it together for me did that.
7605954 i'm tempted to redesign your cover art for you .-.
7605959
I'd certainly appreciate it if you did.
Wait... If they know that their enemies live at the antique shop what's stopping them from sending some ninjas in there while they sleep?
...Am I missing something completely obvious that has already been explained?
7606037
Mostly because the Antique Shop has enough good magic imbued into the very walls that Shadow Khan can't be sent in at this point, and Jackie plus Audrey means nothing short of a full demon incursion will be effective.
Very good chapter, can't wait to see how the Enforcers and Crusaders work together. I'm not worried about Ratso and Tohru much though, they like the Crusaders. But can Tohru do a Fastball special with Scootaloo to give her enough speed she gets a feel for the sound barrier and makes it her goal to break it by wing power????
7605954
If someone was to do a better cover design would you take it?
7606153
Absolutely!
7605629
In this job market? I'd believe it.
This could get really bad, really quick. Looking forward to more.
Keep up the great work. Deus tecum.
Gonna need moar dakka...... a metric fuck-ton more.
Another enjoyable chapter. Great job.
Good to know Ratso is aware of how insane Lovecraft was.
Shendu is right to be concerned with the Elder Ones. What will happen though if fans of Cthulu try to help bring the end times?
Also what if the Rat Talisman landed in a Bible? Would angels and demons come forth? Or would we get God and the Four Horseman? Cause if the spiritual aspect can call ancient beings into this world then a number of books are gateways it sounds like.
Yeah, hero villain team up.
I always like it when these things happen. While Shendu understands how grim the situation is I'm surprised he's willing to give up the one talisman that can free him from his prison. You think he be the type who would try to take it as soon as the danger is over. I wonder if the Shadowkhan can be of any use. Can dark magic beat dark magic or only good can?
7606613
True but for the part about bringing God or angels forth .. . well it could also call upon powerful figures or legends as well. Samson for instance who has strength so long as he has hair. Also the Son of God, Jesus Christ and his betrayer Judas Iscariot. Jesus coming forth would cause a lot of trouble with the miracles as well as answers for our little crusaders. Judas though is a mixed bag. I see him working to atone but see the possibility of betrayal as well to help Shendu.
As for the Four Horseman I know about the part with seven seals in the Revelations book but if Cthulu can come forth then what stops say Death coming forth in his pale, bony form? Or the Red Dragon said to appear. Death in fact would be as bad as Cthulu if the plagues of Egypt have truth as he could claim the firstborn of every house in San Francisco.
7606613
7606655
Two things I'd like to say.
First, please take this discussion of theology to PM.
Second, the reason this worked with a Lovecraft book isn't just because so many people believe it so strongly. It's also because Lovecraft just happened to get it right and the Elder Gods are always actively trying to get back into the physical plane of existence.
It wouldn't work for a Bible because God would choose not to supply the necessary Mental aspect of the spell. It created a Cthulhu facsimile because he happened to be featured in the book the Talisman fell in more than the others, but it could have easily been any of the others.
7606659
Sorry,
Also that makes sense. So the magical or spiritual energy is present with the talisman and physical is gathered over time depending on strength of the entity called forth. BUT the mental aspect is what I failed to account for. After all the statue of a god coming forth like the one episode of Jackie Chan adventures made me think that with the right circumstances any being could rise.
Mental state of the author might be a factor I should consider as well as Lovecraft had drinking problems and was insane. Which makes anything from Shakespeare with the Fairies to other such monsters like Slenderman possible coming forth. Didn't know the entity had power in making their arrival preventable though if it's as you say for the bible.
7606690
Actually, any divine being could come forth as a facsimile, much like Quetzalcoatl does in that episode. However, the divine being in question has to want to come forth or exert influence, and have the power to do so. In the case of the Elder Gods, their powers are excessively vast, but their ability to influence the physical plane from their dimension is limited. In the case of Younger Gods, it would have to be a statue in an area where said god had worshipers. In the case of statues of people, the person in question has to have had unfinished business, or a strong sense of duty to things that have become significant in the present (like the Chi Warrior in the next episode chronologically).
In the case of any other statue or inanimate object, you just get the basic instincts of the shape, unless - like the Gnomekop toy - there's an associated lore around it. (Based on this headcanon, in the original show the mental aspect to make Gnomekop act like Gnomekop came from how much Jade played with it.)
7606730
I put a lot of thought into the workings of magic when I write a story that takes place in a magic world.
I still remember everything I had planned out for "On Snow White Wings", my JCA/Harry Potter crossover where Jade attends Hogwarts alongside Harry and the others. Never finished year four...don't know if I'll ever get back to it...
Hope I get to write the scene where Hogwarts transforms into an Daemon Elemental powered golem to fisticuffs with Final Form Drago someday...
7606732
I would love to see that!
Welp Its Friday. Got to stop an another eldritch abomination from destroying our plane of exsistence AGAIN!
Sigh... Jackie Chan managed to begin the destruction of the world AGAIN...
If Shendu knows about Cthulhu, I wonder what Uncle could comment... He could have a heart attack, but well, they have something to give Shendu for Christmas, the books of Lovecraft.
7606732
The question then becomes, what happens when you use the Rat Talisman on a warship? Does the warship become operational on it's own, albeit under the control of whoever cast the spell, or do we get a Kantai Collection scenario where the ship becomes intelligent and has it's own personality? What about using it on ships that are old enough that, according to Japanese mythology, they would have tsukumogami? Does the Rat Talisman just put the tsukumogami in control of the ship? I'm really curious about this.
I would be more surprised but I just saw a Sly Cooper Story from Tat. I literally don't care about ink Cthulhu at the moment.
EDIT: The binge intensifies! Melody and "Dressed to Steal" with a side of Jak & Daxter.