• Member Since 1st Dec, 2015
  • offline last seen May 16th, 2019

Sunsette


worthless piece of shit :P

T

Starlight Glimmer had been forgiven for her actions and now resides in Ponyville, Equestria with Twilight. One day, she was trotting around the Library, and find a particular book in the relentlessly dark corner of the library that catches, and holds, her attention—“Forerunners.”

Chapters (3)
Comments ( 10 )

First paragraph last sentence, "we're" should be were.

Pargraph twenty seven, ""Look i'm sorry i didn-" She was cut off from Twilight's hoof. "It's alright, i-i'm sorry if i shouted at you..." She replied, wiping away the tear's in her eye."" I'm and I should all have capital "I's".

Paragraph forty, "Halo's" doesn't need an apostrophe

There were a few more grammar mistakes but other than that, I'm enjoying the story so far. My one piece of advice is to make sure you re-read your chapter several times before posting, or ask somebody else to proof read. Trust me it will help a lot. I look forward to your next chapters, this is pretty interesting.

7087274 thank you for your advice, i'll make sure to double check the grammar next time :twilightsheepish:

7F

I wonder Do you have plan to insert Twi and Starlight into period of forerunner Saga aka the cryptum, the primordium and the silentium?
Considering title of fiction and content...

7101062 Soon :) still kind of thinking about it possible sequel confirmed :O

Wow, that was... amazing. I'll admit that at first I was a bit skeptical about an MLP and Halo crossover. All this chapter has done is prove me wrong. I think the idea is really good. I'm sure it's been done before somewhere but this is my first time reading a story like this. Definitely looking forward to more. My one word of advise is on apostrophes

'S shows something has ownership
S' means multiple things have ownership over one object
ies/s/es shows that something is plural

Keep this in mind for future stories. With that said I'm excited to see how this plays out!:yay:

7101063 Hi, Here is A Private Message I Just sent to you Today Celebrating the February 17th 2017 Release of Halo Wars 2...http://www.fimfiction.net/manage_user/messages/9024531
with thanks and Dearest Hopes Up,
From Your Biggest Fan of All Time in the History of all of Reality,
Shane W.L. Nokes aka James S.K. Plasma aka Dark-Pulse/Darkimus-Primal

Interesting. This deserves more attention.

Well starlight lost her sanity.

Well this could be interesting.

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