Epilogue
Risa's sun was slowly sinking under the horizon, its brilliant light reflected off the ocean, causing the surface of the water to sparkle and shine. A warm and gentle breeze swept over the beach and ruffled through Luna's feathers. Her mane ignored the breeze and instead rippled to an unfelt wind, as the stars inside it shimmered and shined. Two alicorns and a not-quite-human stood on a walkway adjacent to the sandy shore.
"What, pray tell, is the hold up Discord?" Luna asked, tapping her hooves impatiently on the sand covered walkway.
For the last year Celestia and Luna had enjoyed a much needed vacation. Apart from a small adventure here or there, most of their time had been spent relaxing on the pristine beach that stretched out before them. The native inhabitants of Risa had initially been confused over Luna and Celestia's appearance, having never met another species quite like the two ponies, but after they had gotten used to the two alicorns, they had proved extremely hospitable. A small and private bungalow had been assigned to the two sisters, who preferred to spend most of their time enjoying peace and quiet. Occasionally they ventured into the more populated areas to enjoy the local entertainment and learn more about Risa's culture.
The vacation had been a good one, but now it was time to return to Equestria. Luna watched the demi-god. He was still in his human form and still wearing the same ridiculous red and black uniform that he had donned the moment they arrived in this dimension. A large portal sat directly in front of the three immortals. As Discord rapidly snapped his fingers, the surface of the portal phased from solid to permeable as it jumped through dimensions.
Unusual for the chaos god, he wore a grim mask of determination on his face that betrayed the fact that something was not quite right. Luna hadn't noticed it yet but Celestia picked up on it the moment his lips twitched into a frown.
"Discord, stop," Celestia said.
Discord snapped his fingers one last time and the portal vanished.
"You're having trouble opening the portal back to Equestria," Celestia stated, looking at the draconequus in human form.
"Yes," Discord said as he hung his head in shame.
There was a thud as Luna dropped her piña colada in surprise. The cup bounced off the sand, spilling the rest of her drink. She had been paying more attention to the final drink of her vacation than to Discord's attempts to open a portal. That changed when she heard him confess his difficulties, she frowned, partially over the lost drink but mostly over the news itself.
If Celestia was nervous about Discord's statement, she didn't show it. Instead her horn lit up, glowing dimly. She concentrated, focusing her magic as best she could as looked for the source of Discord's issues.
"The alignment between dimensions has shifted... but they still should be close enough to form a portal... barely," Celestia said. "That much I can still feel."
During their extended vacation, both sisters had recovered fully, but the nature of the universe they now occupied prevented them from accessing their full range of magic. They were mostly limited to holding their pony forms, magical levitation, simple spells and flight. It had been disturbing at first, but since the two were trying to refrain from using magic, in the end they had grown to enjoy the restriction. That however, meant they could not assist Discord in opening the portal back to Equestria. If he was having problems, they could be trapped.
"You had a portal open, and it did pierce the veil, where did it lead too?" Luna asked.
"I can get close... dimensionally speaking, but I can't reach Equestria itself. I've tried everything I can think of," Discord said.
"Breaking through the barrier between dimension is the hardest part of the spell, how is it that you can handle that but not aligning it with our home universe?" Celestia asked.
"The alignment isn't the only issue. There is... there is a time differential between the dimensions as well," he admitted as he took a seat on a chair that he materialized out of nowhere.
"What!?" Luna asked as she started to tap her forehooves nervously. "If time flows differently in Equestria we could be late. Very late. This is serious."
"What is the differential?" Celestia asked, maintaining her clam.
"Faster... or slower... I can't tell, it might not even be consistent," Discord said.
"That would make opening the portal more difficult, but it shouldn't be impossibly so," Celestia said. "Unless you were having trouble summoning the energy to overcome the temporal gradient and the dimensional shift at the same time, but I know you should have the power to do so."
Discord winced, then quickly tried to hide the fact by looking away. This time even Luna noticed.
"You said you have come to this dimension before, many times in fact. That captain seemed to know you quite well, if by a different name. What hath changed?" Luna asked.
"Never directly from Equestria before, but yes, I've been here before," Discord said as he slumped in his chair. He snapped his fingers and a marble chess set appeared in front of him. The pieces began to move around the board, playing out a game. He watched for a few moments and then shuddered.
"I tried to plan this out, but in the end, it's just not my thing. I've never really cared for this, too many rules and too orderly," he said, looking at the chess set. "It's more Celestia's game."
"Discord, you are not acting like yourself. If something is wrong tell us, we may be able to help," Celestia said, gently placing a hoof on Discord's shoulder.
Discord slumped even farther down and let out a sigh.
"I have been maintaining a spell on an individual in Equestria," he said.
Both sisters stared for a moment before Luna spoke up.
"That would take an enormous amount of magic," she said. "You are not originally from Equestria so maintaining an active connection to that dimension for this entire time... if you were mortal you'd have killed yourself."
"Who, and what was the spell for?" Celestia asked.
"It was a translation spell, more or less, and it was for a human."
"There is a human in Equestria? How in Tartarus did a human get into Equestria?" Luna asked.
"Discord, if that human is anything like the humans from this universe, Equestrian magic would quickly poison them," Celestia said with concern.
"The translation spell had some additional properties, it didn't straight up protect the human, but it reduced the effects," Discord said glumly. "Or it did, it was terminated not too long ago."
"The human will die!" Luna shouted. Discord merely laughed.
"I don't think so. It was Twilight who severed my connection, though I do not think it was on purpose. I could tell that mare's magic even from here. That human isn't human anymore. She found some way to transform him. He's probably learning to walk on hooves now," Discord said with a smile. Despite the seriousness of the situation, the thought of a human bumbling about on all fours sent him giggling.
"Why did you send a human to Equestria?" Celestia asked, her expression turning serious.
"If there's one thing that's surprisingly consistent across the dimensions, it's that humans are... special. More often than not, they lack any sort of magical abilities, yet even in the dimensions that this is true, they still tend to thrive, against all odds. They are curious, adaptable, unpredictable... chaotic. They overcome their own limitations through an almost innate ability to master technology. Look at the humans in this universe. Not a single drop of magic, but they travel the stars," Discord said.
"They are a curious and interesting species, but that hardly answers the question," Luna said.
"There is one other skill that seems almost innate to humanity," Discord said grimly. "One other area that they seem excel at."
"What is that?" Luna asked.
"War."
Neither Celestia nor Luna spoke up for several moments. Even Celestia's normally unreadable expression had changed to a look of shock. Finally, she opened her mouth.
"Why...?
Discord didn't even let her finish.
"I warned you that Chrysalis was not the only threat to Equestria. I felt something coming, something that you would not have been able to handle in your condition. Equestria's future is not clear to me, I could not determine the exact source of it but something happened in the not-too-distant future. A war, leading up to some event that was so chaotic it sent ripples back in time that I was able to feel. The only thing I could tell with any certainty was that a massive conflict, larger than any Equestria had seen before was coming, cumulating in a final event that involved my own powers, that of your own and destruction beyond belief."
"WHAT?! Why didn't you say anything!?" Luna demanded.
"If I had, would you have left?" Discord asked. "I knew something had to be done, but every action I took only made the ripple stronger. Our very presence seemed to agitate things, the only solution seemed to be to remove us from the game."
Discord turned back to the chess game and removed the kings and queens from the board. "I did what I could, I gave Equestria a fighting chance. The portal spell I cast as we left fragmented into thousands of shards. Each was designed to scour a multitude of dimensions and find something or someone that would tip the balance in Equestria's favor. When it latched onto a human, I was at first concerned something had gone wrong, but the more I think about it, the more I think it went right."
"Is this human some great warrior from another universe?" Luna asked.
"Perhaps, I am not sure, all I really know is that it pulled in a human and if my spell was woven correctly, it pulled in the right one."
"What do you mean, the right one?" Celestia asked.
"The spell was supposed to analyze any beings it could find and choose one that had a high probability of being able to help based on a number of criteria. Celestia, you of all ponies should know, a warrior isn't always the right tool for the job. Twilight certainly isn't one, but look what she's accomplished," Discord said.
"That is true," Celestia said. "Sometimes, the right pony in the wrong place can make make all the difference in the world."
"Or in this case, the right man," Discord said with a laugh.
"I still think this is grave news. The fate of our world lies in the hands of an unknown human with unknown abilities," Luna said. "How do you know this human will be able to do anything at all?"
"As I said, the future is hazy, even more so since we are separated from Equestria. I can only sense probable outcomes based on the strength of ripples and clouded visions of the future. Removing us from Equestria shifted the odds, favoring a positive outcome for ponykind, the great cataclysm we were involved with seems to have all but vanished, but war it seems, is still inevitable. All I can really say is ever since the human arrived, Equestria's odds have steadily improved."
"What are they now?" Celestia asked.
"A coin flip," Discord said, pulling a bit from thin air and tossing it into the air. "They aren't getting any better than that, but neither are they growing worse."
"We can't just sit here, what are our options?" Luna asked.
"I can't tell what would happen if we returned while the human was still there, too many variables. We may be able to help or we may make things worse. One thing is for sure though, I'm too drained to open a portal to Equestria, we'll have to wait till I recover." Discord said with a shrug.
"Unacceptable," Luna said loudly as she stamped a hoof down, kicking up some sand.
"There is one other option Discord," Celestia said. "You can open a portal to other dimensions, but not back to Equestria. We can't assist in this universe, but in another, where we had access to more magic, we could."
"That would be risky sister, not every universe has a path to Equestria. We may have to travel through several before we find one that does," Luna said.
"I could do it, but the number of dimensions I can reach right now is limited. And even I have not explored them all. The more we travel through though, the more energy I will have to use. Eventually we're going to get stuck somewhere for a very long time," Discord said.
"That's just a chance we will have to take. Luna is right, we can't just sit here," Celestia said.
"I can try to steer us towards a dimension where your magic will work better in, but we may have to make several jumps through a chain of universes. None of the ones I can reach directly right now will improve our situation at all," Discord said.
"Let us be off then," Luna said.
Discord stood up and snapped his fingers again. A portal opened, swirling and pulsing with magical energies.
"Ladies," he said. "After you."
Luna and Celestia stepped through and Discord followed. A moment later the portal vanished, leaving no trace of the three beings who had stood there just seconds ago.
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Complete...wtf. I want more now
8168725
And you shall get it. I'm definitely not abandoning anything, I planned this from the beginning (to split it into 2 parts) I've been working on part 2 on and off for about 2 months (but most of my time has been going into polishing up TRM before chapter releases. Now that TRM is done, I can focus 100% of my writing time on part 2.
well now this is a vary interesting end to part one.
I was kind of hoping for a short stop on the NCC1701-D for a bit of help from a android. but it was not to be.
this first story is grate and I will most defiantly be watching for sequels.
aw hell yea brilliant way of dropping the title in the epilogue XD
Per some of the events published in "I, Q", if DisQord can locate the Guardian of Forever wherever it got off to, that would help take care of any temporal components involved in their return...perhaps just a little late in arriving...maybe a few hundred years or so...♪♫
Looking forward to the next book, and hope you'll do some side stories of what they did during their vacation on the Enterprise, Risa & points in between
Well this was an interesting chapter and I thought it was interesting to see Discord actually having a plan to get the princess getting a descent rest managed to trick them to get out of the board game if he actually thought it was the only option for the survival of Equestia. I wonder who else they are going to fight against, the Yaks, the Deers, the Zebra's, the Centaur's, the Alpaca's?
8169016
Well done, I enjoyed this story. A bit of a jarring stop what with the events in equestria rapidly coming to a head but, I am pleased to hear that you are continuing.
I'm looking forward to the sequel to this.
I cannot get a scenario out of my head. I know that it makes no sense in-continuity, but I cannot escape the mental image of a UFO descending from space in full view of ponies. The door opens, the ramp comes down. An alien steps out. "Citizens of Equestria!" he loudly proclaims. "Take from me your leaders!"
Then Celestia, Luna, and Discord are hustled down the ramp, and the spaceship quickly leaves again.
I still picture celstias group return showing up in a battlefield and Celestia being shot in the ass
8170691
BANG
Twilight runs over and checks on the Celestia
SHE'S OKAY EVERYPONY!
Thank... um Celestia, I guess, for immortal leadership.
8170492
A cliché with some grains of irony to mix in some originality. I like it.
are you going to make a sequel?
8174326
Yes. It will take me some time, but I am working on it.
8174330 ok.
8177608 No problem. I do not give out kind words easily.
An excellent story so far, and I must admit, not entirely what I'd expected. Very well polished, even with a glitch here and there, and it flowed very well. I look forward to the next half!
8193056
Glad you enjoyed it.
If you see any glaring errors, especially grammar or spelling, let me know in a PM or here in the comments. I'll be sure to fix them when time permits
8221350
There gonna be a sequel to this? Just asking for future reference since I haven't read this yet but plan to.
8227889
Yep! It's (slowly) in progress right now.
Where is the sequel
8276045
Still in progress. It will be a while before I'm ready to post anything.
Ok.
Finally finished reading this and what a captivating read it was. I am eagerly awaiting the sequel. Great Story!
8294986
Glad you enjoyed it!
8169313
Hey, anyone wanna help me modify the lines? let's see what we cal all come up with
8319055
Doo eeet
God damn it, just why, this shit got me thinking so hard, its 1 am and now I cant sleep for a few hours, WWWHHHHHYYYY
Also I wanted to yell at Hail Storm cause as an aspiring (I think thats the right word) weapons engineer I thought of so many better ways to make guns, even (personal opinion) better guns. Now i gotta wait for the sequel and then scream some more
8338134
While I do try to look up ways things get done in the real world so I can have some semblance of accuracy, a gunsmith I am not. Nor do I have any real knowledge of metalworking beyond what I've read on the net. So there are prob plenty of things I'm not getting correct or not doing the best way.
As for better guns, we'll get there.
It's (slowly) in progress.
8338855
I mean a lot was correct, actually I only found one issue, and even then it was mostly personal choice in how the weapon is made, not gonna really go into detail unless you want me to. Its mostly the "how I would do it" that peeved me. Nothing was really wrong. Anyway great story, waiting for sequel
8338922
Huzzah!
That's good to hear.
Well, if you feel like it you can always PM me.
The sequel is going to going to introduce new weapons so there will be more technical bits. If I can improve something and still have it fit the story, I will.
Glad you enjoyed it!
Been meaning to leave a comment for a while, so here we go:
I've got decidedly mixed feelings on guns. I grew up with and around people who believed strongly in "responsible gun use." I've also seen, a little more recently, the harm they can cause. I say this to emphasize that I really like how you've handled things in this story: he comes at things from the perspective of an enthusiast and hobbyist, liking the positive aspects but not shying away from the more negative aspects. I did get a little nervous as more and more Equestrians began seeing the more warlike aspects of what he was building, but then you brought it home and gave it a purpose with your ending.
So congratulations: I'm invested, I'm on board, and I really like what you've done. I would love to read more, of course, but thank you for writing this.
8343914
I'm glad you enjoyed the story, thank you for the comment.
I know I put a lot of information about firearm safety, which might not be the most exciting thing in the world to read, but from my perspective, it seemed more realistic (as realistic as a story about magical ponies can be anyway
) because Hail Storm isn't just introducing someone to the sport of shooting, he's introducing them to the concept of firearms entirely. Ponies don't have even the basic knowledge that most humans have (like what a gun is and which end the bullet comes out of).
At the same time I think Hail Storm's task was eased by the fact that ponies don't have any preconceived notions about firearms. I think a lot of people have this flawed knowledge set where firearms come off as scary because they think they know more than they actually do.
And of course since I knew from when I started writing this that part 2 was going to involve a war I wanted to slowly get ponies introduced to firearms so they wouldn't just appear out of nowhere.
is there going to be a sequel?
8382323
There sure will be, I'm working on it now (literally). It will be a while though.
8382338
cool, and now we play the waiting game.
8410792
Ah, missed that. Sorry.
8411435
No worries!
I had to go back and check since if it was just the towel, you'd be right. Like I mentioned, I try to have some consistency, but there's def some spots where I just kinda guessed at prices. If you notice any other spots that look off let me know and I'll evaluate and fix if needed.
8419013
That's a pretty long time even for real bureaucracy. Hal already commented on the surreal speed to talk directly to a ruler, and even of he didn't, that one sentence I typed is a pretty alarming cliffnote that would shoot uphill like lightning (again, one that Shiny would already have cottoned on to through his soldiers' sport shooting).
Military bureaucracy tends to obstruct procedural changes and outside interference, or even information going downhill. But flow of extremely high priority intel up to higher ranks is like the main thing it's designed to do. If a military took 8 or 9 months to relay that kind of thing, that is an intimately failed military.
8419699
That's actually kind of the point. I would say Equestria's military is a failed military. The Royal Guard is the token remnants of a military that hasn't seen anything approaching real war in thousands of years, save for the changeling invasion, in which they got their asses handed to them due to their complete lack of experience. They've been out of the game so long that not a single living member of the guard has any actual military experience, nopony has done anything but police work for centuries. Add in slower communication compared to what we would have (their primary mode of communication would be written letters which means a report traveling across the country could take days to even weeks to reach its destination), there's no email or faxes and I don't think they'd be sending reports via telegram)
8419739
And I'd expect that to be reflected in their training, tactics, armaments, etc. But I can't even think of a lot of civilian jobs where you wouldn't get extra-fired for failing to pass that along within hours, much less one that's functionally a police force that the story has confirmed as seeing occasional activity from monsters etc. They may not be prepared to wage a protracted war, but the abstract idea of urgency should not be particularly alien.
The batponies wouldn't even have to report it in a military capacity; as has been pointed out to Hal, they could just fly to the castle as civilians and get the direct ear of ponies in charge.
8420110
Information just didn't flow that fast before the invention of modern communication methods. Beyond that I find it suspect that there wouldn't be some sort of internal investigation to confirm the contents of the report before it was passed up the chain. Sequel spoiler: It isn't a major plot point or anything but I do talk about some of these delays in the first chapter of the sequel, which I'm still working on.
I suppose, but it seems more reasonable they'd go through official channels first, there isn't enough urgency for them to go directly to the princesses. When Silent Night and Thunderbolt are first exposed to guns there is no mass production going on, so the timing isn't critical. When they first go shooting there's less than 100 guns in existence, most of them shotguns and there's no mass supply of ammunition. The vast majority of the ammunition that is being produced is being consumed on Hail's range, so there's not even a stockpile of it somewhere that could be used to fight a battle. Also remember, the rifle that made the biggest impact was the bolt action which isn't even in production, there's literally only one on the planet. It it important that Silent Night and Thunderbolt report this, but it isn't really a super time critical message... unless you also know about the coming changelings, which nopony does at that time.
To an earlier point you had made that I had missed...
It isn't anywhere near half the guard, at that point in time that it's a fraction of a percent, even by the end of the story it's still under a tenth of the guard (I'd say somewhere between 2-5%) because Hail's production is just not that fast. You can't arm an entire military weapons coming out of a single small location. Hail simply doesn't have the production capacity. That makes the matter less urgent, at least from anypony who doesn't know about the impending changeling invasion. Sequel spoiler: Part of the sequel will deal with the fact that Hail can't arm an army with his current production and his need to expand things.
I love this story.
Sorry for lack of comments, I would have given 20 (1 for each chapter) of them by now but I was forced to read offline.
Not certain what to say specificity of the story it's self, to me there wasn't really a low and high put, I think CORACK keep the interest and excitement through out.
Hardly noticed I got the epilogue. Fantastic work mate.
8421420
Haha, no worries. That's how I do the vast majority of my fanfic reading so I understand.
I'm glad you enjoyed it!
Can’t wait for the next book
8518728
It's sloooooooowllyyyy getting written.
"Why did you send a human to Equestria?" Celestia asked, her expression turning serious.
"If there's one thing that's surprisingly consistent across the dimensions, it's that humans are... special. More often than not, they lack any sort of magical abilities, yet even in the dimensions that this is true, they still tend to thrive, against all odds. They are curious, adaptable, unpredictable... chaotic. They overcome their own limitations through an almost innate ability to master technology. Look at the humans in this universe. Not a single drop of magic, but they travel the stars," Discord said.
"They are a curious and interesting species, but that hardly answers the question," Luna said.
"There is one other skill that seems almost innate to humanity," Discord said grimly. "One other area that they seem excel at."
"What is that?" Luna asked.
"War."
friend that awesome i cant wait!!
let's see how our heroes are doing
pbs.twimg.com/media/BZc9pLHCEAE2jNm.jpg:large
Not gonna lie, did not like quite a bit of this story. Him going pony, him just going, "Lets bring guns to Equestria!" and ponies being completely chill about it as well as the military not dive bombing on it the second he started talking about selling them.
The epilogue however clears up a few of my misgivings and answers some questions but I still can't get behind his mindset of, "Lets make and sell guns! This is totally fine and will never be a problem." Its worth noting that I really dislike human turned pony stories and guns in general but nice work making a story including both that I find interesting, compelling to read and likeable.
Good story overall, had a few errors here and there but nothing really detracting from the experience. Great pacing btw, you managed to have everything not feel rushed and threw in quite a bit of foreshadowing. In the back of my mind I would read something and a minute later be like, "Thats going to be important in the future." I will check out the sequel.